Annotations will appear as you listen
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36:15
Car
1991 Nissan Maxima
This is a mid-sized family sedan made by Nissan that was designed to be more fun to drive than a standard commuter car, featuring a powerful engine and sporty handling.
Part
brake rotor
This is the shiny metal disc you can see behind your car's wheels. When you step on the brakes, the car squeezes this disc to slow you down.
Car
1995 Jeep Grand Cherokee
This is a popular mid-sized SUV made by Jeep that was designed to be comfortable for daily driving while still being able to handle rough off-road trails.
Car
1992 Mitsubishi Expo
This is a vintage, tall station wagon made by Mitsubishi that offered lots of cargo space and optional four-wheel drive, acting as an early ancestor to modern crossover SUVs.
Car
Colt Vista
The Colt Vista is a small, boxy station wagon from the 1980s and 1990s that was built by Mitsubishi but sold by Dodge. It was designed to carry up to seven people in a small vehicle, serving as an early alternative to a minivan.
Part
viscous coupling
This is a fluid-filled device in four-wheel-drive cars that helps the front and back wheels turn at different speeds when you make a tight turn, preventing the car from shaking or binding up.
Part
carburetor
This is an older mechanical part that mixes gasoline with air before sending it into the engine to be burned. Most modern cars use computers and fuel injectors instead.
Car
1989 Chevrolet Suburban
This is a very large, heavy-duty SUV made by Chevrolet that is built like a truck, designed to carry lots of passengers and tow heavy trailers.
Car
Lincoln Town Car
This is a very large, comfortable luxury sedan made by Lincoln that was often used as a limousine or executive transport because of its smooth ride and giant trunk.
Car
1993 Audi 90S
This is a small, upscale sedan made by Audi in the 1990s that featured luxury touches like heated seats and headlight washers, along with a smooth V6 engine.
Part
transmission computer
This is a small computer dedicated entirely to controlling your car's automatic transmission, telling it exactly when to change gears.
LIVE
This is our glass. On This American Life, one that we like is a good mystery.
Sometimes about really big things, but most times, the little mysteries are the best.
Our lost and found is currently filled with pants. I don't know, I've never seen this happen.
Wait, is this true?
This is true.
Mysteries of every size, each week, This American Life, wherever you get your podcasts.
Music
Hello and welcome to Car Talk from National Public Radio with us, Click and Clack, the Tapper Brothers.
And we're broadcasting this week from the Department of Public Transportation here at Car Talk Plaza.
Here's a report, man. 98% of the United States commuters favor public transportation.
Well, I should mention.
For others.
This is from the onion.
Washington, D.C. A study released Monday by the American Public Transportation Association reveals
that 98% of Americans support the use of mass transit by others.
Here's a quote, with traffic congestion, pollution and oil shortages all getting worse.
Now is the time to shift to affordable, efficient public transportation.
After director Howard Collier said, fortunately, as his report shows, Americans have finally
recognized the need for everyone else to do exactly that.
Of the studies, 5,200 participants, 44% cited faster commutes as the primary reason to expand public transportation.
Because if there's no one else is on the road, you're going to pass right there.
There you go.
Now, expanding mass transit isn't just a good idea.
It's a necessity, said Anaheim, California resident Lance Holland.
My drive to work is unbelievable.
I spend more than two hours stuck in 12 lanes of traffic.
It's about time somebody did something to get these other cars off the road.
It goes on to say we should all be using, they should all be, be using public transportation.
Not we.
The campaign is intended to de-emphasize the inconvenience and social stigma associated with public transportation,
focusing instead on the positives.
Among these are the health benefits of getting fresh air while waiting at the bus stop,
the chance to meet interesting people from a diverse array of low-paying service sector jobs,
and the opportunity to learn new languages by reading Subway ads written in Spanish.
People need to realize that public transportation isn't just for some poor sucker to take to work,
Claudia said.
They should also be taken in shopping, to the mall, to the supermarket, and to the laundry.
Isn't it the truth?
Well, if you'd like to talk about the benefits of public transportation for everyone else that is,
or if you have an actual question about your car because you don't use public transportation,
give us a call at 1-888-CAR-TALK, that's 888-227-8255.
Hello, you're on Car Talk.
Hello, this is Paul from Aspen.
Hi, Paul from Aspen. How are you?
Aspen.
Yeah.
The ski place?
The ski place.
That's where all those big stars go and they ski and they break their legs,
and everyone goes to see them and drink coffee with them and stuff like that.
Something like that.
So, what's your problem?
Actually, I have a problem with my 91 Nissan Maximus.
It's the best car I've ever owned, actually.
Great.
Yeah, it's a great car.
But, for the past couple months, actually, it's been making some funny noise from the...
I think it's coming from the left front wheel well.
Any time I press on the brakes, if you press on it a tiny bit, it won't make it.
If you press on it too much, it won't make it.
But if you hit this little middle spot, it makes this kind of metallic croaking frog sound.
Not quite like that.
A little higher pitched, perhaps?
A little higher pitched and kind of delicate.
Sort of like F above middle C?
Possibly.
Actually, I'll try to make the sound for you, but it sounds a little bit more like a duck
if you can translate it into a frog.
It's kind of like...
Did you do that again?
Hey, that's great!
You have to do it again.
Do it again.
Okay, one more time.
One more time.
What just happens?
Is there anyone in the car with you?
Oh, God.
And it only happens when the car is moving, right?
Yeah, the car is moving.
And it's proportional to how fast it's going.
The rhythm of it will be a lot faster if I'm going faster.
Well, let's tell you all the things that you don't need.
Yeah, exactly.
You don't need a CV joint.
That would have cost you 300 bucks.
You don't need an engine rebuilt.
You don't need a transmission rebuilt.
You don't need a new glove box door.
The heat of core, 750 bucks, you don't need that either.
Don't you feel good, man?
This is good news so far, you're right.
What does he need?
I have a famous idea.
I think you have a warped disc rotor.
You do?
Yeah, I'm going to ask you a dangerous question.
Uh-oh.
In that if you give the wrong answer, it could shoot a hole in the whole theory.
Uh-oh.
If you drive it at high speed.
And you step on the brake a little bit.
Do you feel a vibration or a pulsation in the pedal or a vibration in the car
or an oscillation of the steering wheel or the...
Everything depends on...
Or does your left kneecap get itchy?
Everything depends on your answer to this question.
It doesn't really.
It doesn't pull, it doesn't vibrate.
You don't feel any pulsation.
See, that's why I...
I was honest at least.
I said I have no idea.
Wow.
Yeah, but then I'm the default mode.
Well, yeah, I knew that wasn't going to...
I knew you were going to get a bad answer to that question.
No, I suspected I might and that's why I asked it with reservations.
And now you're sorry you asked, aren't you?
Because do you have a backup?
You always.
No, I do not have a backup position.
Oh, you don't?
No, I have a new philosophy now.
I'm sticking with it.
Now, I think you do have a warped rotor
and I think if you take the thing out and drive it on the highway
you're going to say, oh my God, I never noticed that I have a pulsation.
It may be very slight.
The rotor is so slightly warped
that it's not maybe enough to make the car shake
or the pedal pulse at high speed.
I don't like it.
But I would be willing to bet if you took it to your shop
and asked them to put a dial indicator
on that left front disc rotor
that they'd say, oh my God, it's warped
and if they either replace it or machine it, the problem will go away.
Right on.
Yeah, the other possibility is that the left front wheels
getting ready to fall off.
Well, that's the same kind of noise you would get in fact
if you had a wheel nuts that were loose.
Are you serious?
Yeah, I'm serious.
So you should check that first.
It's unlikely possibility because you'd probably be dead now.
Yeah, no, that's why I'm sticking.
I'm sticking with it, Paul.
I'm sticking with it.
All right.
See you later, man.
Thank you.
Bye-bye.
Bye-bye.
1-888-CAR-TALK, that's 888-227-8255.
Hello, you're on Car Talk.
Hi, this is Becca.
I'm calling from Minneapolis.
Becca.
Becca.
I drive a 95 Jeep Cherokee.
This is a regular Cherokee or a Grand Cherokee?
It's a Grand.
Oh, it's Grande.
Yes, it is.
And my ulterior motive for being on the show
is that my father and I both love the show.
My mom, not so much.
So the fact that I'm on the show now.
But you don't like her so much or she doesn't like the show so much?
She doesn't like the show.
So now that I'm on, she has to listen.
Oh, of course.
So that's my ulterior motive.
Sure.
But thankfully, I do actually have a real car problem to share with you guys.
Okay, go ahead.
During the week, regular car driving, my car is beautiful, fine, no problem.
But if I go on the highway for a road trip or a long drive over an hour, whenever I
pull into a gas station or someplace to eat, as soon as I start to turn the wheel.
Or get a haircut.
Take a haircut.
Yeah.
Yeah, exactly.
It starts to jump around as soon as I start to turn the wheel at all.
You can feel it in the steering wheel and you can feel the wheels kind of shaking.
The whole thing just...
And is it worse, the sharper the turn you make?
Yes.
And I'll tell you, my father already has a theory on this.
What is it?
He thinks that my four-wheel drive is engaged.
He's kind of right.
Kind of right.
He's good.
What can't solve is why this only happens when I've been driving highway speed for over
an hour.
Well, I'll tell you a little tale.
Okay.
I knew you would.
I recently became the proud owner of a 92 Mitsubishi Expo all-wheel drive.
For those of you who don't know, it is the replacement for the Dodge Colt Vista.
Not my own Vista, which I still own, but it was the manufacturer's replacement.
I did not know that.
Yes, well, I'm sure you didn't.
Why would you?
And when I test drove the thing, and admittedly, it had a lot of miles on it when I took possession
of it.
Like a million, as I remember.
It was close to one astronomical unit, I believe.
In any event, I test drove it and it was fine.
I drove it around the block like you would drive any other car, and I checked it all out,
and it was pretty good.
And then after I drove it one day for about an hour, I tried to pull into my driveway,
and I couldn't.
Right.
And the thing locked up and then shut it like crazy.
Yeah.
And I determined what I need, and you need the same thing.
Okay.
You need something called a viscous coupling.
A viscous coupling.
Yeah.
My goodness.
And what is that?
Well, it's a coupling that allows slippage between the front and rear wheels.
In other words, allows the pair of front wheels and the pair of rear wheels to turn at different speeds.
Right.
So you can pull into tight places.
Now, why doesn't it do that during regular driving, though?
Well, because the wheels don't need to turn at different speeds.
No, no, but she means why does this thing occur only after an hour of driving?
It has to heat up before it begins up.
When it heats up, that's when it begins to bind up, and it's not free.
Because what happens when you turn, for example, if you make a right-hand turn,
a sharp right-hand turn into a parking space, the wheel that has to turn the fastest
is the left front wheel.
Okay.
And the right rear wheel is hardly moving at all.
Right.
Imagine if you could pivot the thing around the right rear wheel.
Uh-huh.
And as such, the two front wheels, velocities added together, would have to be greater than
the two back wheels, velocities added together.
Right.
So you require something in the middle to differentiate those speeds.
And that thing is called the viscous coupling, except yours ain't doing it.
And it's not allowing the slipping.
And what it's doing is it's making everything try to turn at the same speed,
and that's why the thing shudders.
Right.
It has locked up when it overheats.
So you should avoid turns at all costs.
No, I mean, this is dangerous.
This could be dangerous.
Yeah, this is dangerous.
Because if you had to swerve on a highway after that hour, then the same thing would happen.
And you could easily lose control of the vehicle and crash.
That's not good.
So you need to get it fixed.
I don't know what it costs on your, it costs many hundreds on my poor little...
Oh, no.
Oh, it's gonna cost many hundreds.
And your father is basically right.
He's a good man.
He's a good man, Charlie Brown.
Your mother we're not sure about, but the old man's all right.
The old man's good.
See ya, Becca.
Thanks a lot.
See ya.
Bye-bye.
Bye-bye.
Okay, Tommy, time to test that steel trap mind of yours.
Do you remember anything about last week's puzzler?
Did it have something to do with workplace misunderstandings, moments of terror,
and unexplained backfiring?
Well, you're close.
That was the whoopee cushion we see from the bugs before the show.
Oh.
Why the current Ebola outbreak in Africa could rival the worst on record.
Listen to Shortwave in the NPR app or wherever you get your podcasts.
Follow ConsiderThis wherever you get your podcasts.
Hi, we're back.
You're listening to Car Talk with us.
Click and Clack the Tablet Brothers, and we're here to talk about cars, car repair,
but first up, the answer to last week's puzzler.
First up instead of end up.
First up.
First up.
This one was from the early days of aviation.
Is it coming back to you now?
Can you see yourself with a scarf wrapped around your neck?
I can.
A leather helmet?
I used to have one of those hats.
You're playing football with Newt Rockney.
Oh, the DC3.
The pilot.
Yeah.
Cold Slovenia.
That was too easy.
Oh, darn.
Once upon a time, aircraft mechanics were confused.
Early aircraft mechanics were confused because the airplane engines seemed to backfire through
the carburetor with some kind of regularity.
And this would cause damage to the carburetors or at the very least would require the mechanics
to do extra maintenance.
While they began investigating, figuring there was something wrong and after thorough
investigations, ruminations, recalibrations, and the like, they discovered that the cause
of the backfiring was the pilot.
And in fact, the pilots were doing it on purpose.
The question is...
Like Tony used to do when he went through the tunnel.
Why would a pilot want the engine to backfire through the carburetor, scaring the pants
off himself when it seemed in the estimation of the mechanics to have no useful purpose?
Yeah.
I don't know.
Well, back in the early days, before they had figured out this phenomenon, when pilots
flew under damp and cool conditions, the carburetors would ice up.
Oh, and they would make it backfire to blow the ice out.
Blow the ice out.
Blow it out your carburetor.
So to speak.
Blow the ice out, baby.
And they would either lean out the mixture or advance the timing or do whatever it took
to get the thing to pop back through the carburetor, thus expelling the ice, which if it were
allowed to build up, would eventually stall the engine.
And that would be not good.
That would be not good.
And of course, the same thing happens to automobiles.
It can't happen to automobiles.
Yeah.
And cars have some crude little device which prevents this.
And of course, airplane engines don't really have carburetors anymore, but that's why they
did it.
So who's our winner this week?
The winner is Ginger Culbertson from Greenville, South Carolina.
And for having her answer selected at random from the truckloads of correct answers that
we got, Ginger is going to get, are you ready for this, Ginger?
A $25 gift certificate to the Shameless Commerce Division at the CarTalk section of Cars.com.
And with that $25 gift certificate, what can she get, you might say?
What can she get?
She can get a brand new CarTalk muffler.
You can have a muffler.
It's a black winter muffler, otherwise known as what?
Like a scarf, right?
Hey, hey, does it have a lifetime warranty?
Yes, it does.
Okay.
It says Midas on the side.
It actually, it's embroidered with the CarTalk logo.
And it comes with this, an actual muffler clamp.
Oh.
Isn't that what a nice touch.
Oh man, my brother ordered too many muffler clamps at the garage last year and we were
dying to get rid of them.
So you're going to get one if you buy the muffler.
Wow.
Hey, by the way, if you'd like to tell somebody that you really don't like them that much
this Christmas, you can find all kinds of CarTalk gifts at the CarTalk Shameless Commerce
Division, which is at the CarTalk section of Cars.com, but you can also call that.
Don't we have a number for them?
We do.
Eight car junk.
There you go.
Sure.
Yeah.
Anyway, we'll have a new puzzler coming up.
But it's better to go to Cars.com because then you don't have to answer the phone.
You go to Cars.com.
No one has to do anything.
Go to Cars.com.
Don't bother us with your silly phone calls.
We're busy.
We're working here.
Anyway, we'll have a new puzzler coming up in the third half of today's show, so don't
touch that dial.
In the meantime, you can call us and ask us a question about anything you want.
Hey, do you know what time it is?
Yeah, time to give Berman his annual petrified fruitcake.
No.
It's time to play Stuff the Chumps.
This is the part of the show where we tracked down a previous caller to see if we were on
the ball, on the money, or if we should be on the lamb.
So who's our lucky player this week?
Well, the note here says it's Captain Rob.
I remember him from Oklahoma.
He called because his Chevy Suburban was hesitating at high speeds, but the real problem was that
Captain Rob himself was hesitating.
Oh, he didn't want to go on Operation Desert Excursion with his mother-in-law or something,
wasn't it?
Oh, I think I remember.
Was that it?
I think so.
Well, here it is.
Is that my wife's family is coming out here to do the grand tour of the West during the
hottest time of year with the highest gas prices, and that's a 5,000-mile round trip.
Is her mother going?
Here's the deal.
You hit the nail on the head.
Two years ago, when I was stationed in Germany, I had a 1989 Chevy Suburban, not the same one,
but the same model we're making here.
Yeah, yeah.
And we took a big trip through Austria, France, and down into Italy and Switzerland, and my
mother-in-law, bless her heart, never been out on any major trip, started out the trip
by saying, Rob, you're driving too fast.
That's why I bought my MG.
No backseat.
Mother-in-law proof.
So, do we tell them to go on the trip or what?
Of course not.
We tell them to shoot themselves out and spend the week in the infirmary if you had to.
I remember this.
And what do we tell them was wrong with the Suburban?
Well, we didn't really know.
We told them it was like a bad sensor of some kind, I think.
Rob, you there?
I'm here, guys.
Look, before we find out whether the sensor was faulty.
Oh, the reasoning was faulty.
We need to verify that the answer you're about to give on Stump the Chumps has not been influenced
by our staff, the staff of National Public Radio, or the hired assassin we recently referred
your mother-in-law to.
All right, did you take our advice or did you cave in and go on the trip?
Well, I couldn't get away with shooting myself.
You guys told me that you'd say a couple of novenas.
I don't think you prayed hard enough.
You didn't, huh?
Nah.
How bad was it?
Well, let me tell you.
Day one of this trip, we just clear into New Mexico, driving along fine.
And your mother-in-law's in the front seat, right?
Nah, she's in the middle.
She's in the middle, within striking distance of the back of my head.
We make it into New Mexico.
We're two hours away from Santa Fe, our target.
Black smoke starts pouring out the back of the truck.
Now, the truck didn't hesitate and the temperature didn't jump up, so we didn't know what it
was.
We pull over, I look underneath the truck, and it looks like I cut a main artery.
Cherry juice everywhere.
Oh, no.
So, we call AAA.
Thankfully, two hours later, they showed up rapidly.
Can you have them drive your mother-in-law home?
Exactly.
Leave us here.
Leave us a canteen of water.
Just take her out.
Forget the canteen of water.
Just go.
I can see it now.
Well, they tell us that Santa Rosa, New Mexico is about 20 miles up the road, and since the
truck doesn't seem to be in any problem, other than the transmission fluid all over
the place, I should try and limp that way, because it's going to cost me more to tow
it anywhere.
Yeah.
I'd limp into Santa Rosa, and right there on the side, old Route 66, you're going to
like this guy.
Oh, man.
Bozo's garage is right there.
24-hour mechanic on duty.
My wallet is screaming in my back pocket.
No, don't go there.
Bozo's garage.
Yeah.
I mean, anyone who has the courage to put up a name like that has to be good, right?
Guys, he is unbelievable.
He fixed everything.
He puts it up on the jack.
It's not a problem.
When you blew the front seal and bushing, and every once in a while at a certain speed,
that bushing where the problem was, was allowing that hesitation.
So, all these problems that you were having when you called us, were all solved by fixing
the transmission leak?
You know what?
I never had a transmission leak that I saw.
There was never any fluid that was dripping out, or anything like that.
It wasn't anything to clue us off that the bushing and seal were going bad.
But after he fixed it, that problem was gone.
Right.
You were hesitating in high speeds because the transmission was slipping.
Yeah.
Wow.
And he fixed it for a normative fee, about what you'd expect to pay in any other town.
He had the part.
While I'm sitting there in his shop, he's got like 5000000 trophies all over the
wall for repairing and replacing and fixing up old jollies.
He's got his own museum.
You know, he's a Route 66 guru.
Jeez.
It would be good if you went to cars.com and put Bozo's name and address in the mechanics
files.
I'll do that.
Because he certainly deserves it.
He does.
He was outstanding.
Well, Captain Broad, thanks for playing Stunk to Chumps.
Hey, I enjoyed it.
Bye-bye.
Take care.
More calls and a new puzzler coming up right after these messages.
Recently, cybersecurity researchers discovered a striking computer virus seemingly related
to the conflict between the U.S. and Iran over Iran's nuclear program.
Everything about this thing screams special.
For three weeks in 2020, part of my Seattle neighborhood was taken over by a protest occupation.
We were here to protest police brutality.
But it ended in tragedy.
The whole space felt darker and angrier.
Join me as I investigate the unsolved killing of 16-year-old Antonio Mace Jr.
Listen to We Keep Us Safe on the Embedded Podcast from NPR.
You Get Your Podcasts.
Ha!
We're back.
You're listening to Car Talk with us.
Click and Clack the Tappet Brothers.
And we here to discuss cars, car repair, and the new automotive puzzler.
Automotive?
Well, kind of automotive.
Okay.
You remember our pal Vinny Gumbatz?
Vinny Gumbatz, of course I know him.
Well, he had had, I used the past tense, two cousins, Rocco and Throckmorton.
Don't ask, it was one of those mixed marriages.
There was a male that was involved right here.
And they found themselves in the midst of a little mob fracas.
Yeah.
And next thing you know, they're both locked in the airtight trunk of a late model.
Lincoln tow car.
How did you know?
Yeah, I got it.
The brothers.
Not Vinny.
No, no, Vinny.
No, the two, Rocco and Throckmorton.
Throckmorton.
I never liked him.
The Throckmorton.
Rock and Throckmorton.
I never really liked him.
Yeah.
Well, he was funny.
He wasn't like the rest of the family.
Anyway, they're locked in the trunk.
And after the gun plays subsides, they realize that if they don't get out, they're going
to die.
Yeah.
So Rocco begins beating on the trunk and screaming, let us out, out.
Of course, nothing happens, but he spends considerable energy in doing this.
And the air supply is diminishing rapidly.
Finally, after several hours, Rocco ceases his banging and screaming.
And in fact, he expires.
During this time, Throckmorton has done nothing.
Has it made a sound?
Almost in a trance.
Yeah.
He's just been lying there.
Saving his breath.
Saving his breath, breathing very slowly.
Yeah.
While he watched.
Rocco.
Witness.
While he watched.
Rocco, suck up all the air.
Suck up all the trunk.
Suck up all the air.
And in the process, kill himself.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Hours later, Throckmorton, who's still alive, his car approach, and he figures this is his
chance for good or bad, whatever is going to happen, he's going to bang on the trunk.
He's still alive several hours after Rocco has expired.
Yeah.
And sure enough, it was the police who came.
They opened the trunk and let him free.
Yeah.
The question is, how could he possibly have survived for hours after Rocco?
Sucked up all the air.
Sucked up all the air and expired.
Now, if you think you know the answer, write it on a postcard or grill it, fat side up
into a five-inch stick medium rare Omaha steak with a remoulade or horseradish sauce and
ancho chili butter and rush it to rush overnight delivery, puzzler tower, car talk plaza, box
3500, Harvard Square, Cambridge, our facility, Matt 02238, or you can email your answer from
the car talk section of cars.com.
If you'd like to call us, write this moment, the number is 1-888-CAR-TALK, that's 888-227-8255.
Hello, you're on car talk.
Click and clack.
This is Mary in Seattle, and boy, do I need your help.
Mary, Mary, we've been hoping you would call.
I picked my car up at the garage last week and Rich, the mechanic, said, Mary, you've
got a problem, but we have no idea what's wrong with it.
And we can keep looking for the cost, but it's going to cost a lot of money.
I said, Rich, the ladies at work told me it's time to call car talk.
Maybe I really need to call them.
But it gets better.
It gets better.
Yeah.
He walked over to me, he looked around the shop, and he whispered, I'll tell you what,
Mary, I love car talk.
And if you talk to click and clack, and they can figure out what's wrong with your car,
I'll fix it for free.
Oh, man.
Yeah.
How about that?
Oh, okay.
Talk about putting us on the spot.
Okay, we're ready.
Come on.
I'm counting on you.
Give it to us.
Okay.
Okay.
I have a 1993 Audi 90S.
Oh, already you're in.
Okay.
I bought it against my father's advice.
Yeah, well.
Beautiful pearl white with seat warmers, headlight washers.
Well, those in four bucks will get you a cup of coffee at Starbucks.
Now that it's got a problem, my dad will have nothing to do with it.
And at every chance he gets, he says, my Buick doesn't do that.
So.
What does it do?
You try to accelerate and there's a loss of power for about 15 seconds.
You just sit and wait, you might roll along just a little at a crawl.
And then boom, it'll pick up and off you go.
But the next time that you stop or you slow down, no power.
No power at all.
No, there is, there's power, but no, no.
No acceleration.
So you start from a dead stop.
You step on the gas and no matter how much you step on the gas, the car doesn't really
take off.
Right.
And all of a sudden it's like someone put it into a hyperdrive and bingo.
Yep.
I've got it.
It's the dilithium crystals.
I know what you think.
Well, this guy rich, tell us about rich.
All right.
I mean, does he specialize in Audis?
Yeah, they do.
They do.
They do.
He said he had everybody look in the shop.
Yeah.
He called Audi places all over Seattle.
Yeah.
He pulled up all of these Audi bulletins to see if it was a problem that's ever come
up with this car.
Yeah.
No mention of it anywhere.
No one has heard of this happening.
Yeah.
Well, Mary, you've got a snowball chance of getting this thing fixed for free.
At least it's beginning to look like that, but we have to ask you some more questions.
Let us work on it here for a minute.
Is there ever a time when it accelerates correctly or does it always behave like this?
It does not always behave like this.
It is intermittent and it happened before I bought the car and I told me not to buy
the car.
But you were so smitten with the car that even though you knew your father was right,
you had to have it.
You had to have it because of those damn headlight washers.
I'm coming clean.
Now, here's the problem.
I mean, we give you some ideas.
The only trouble is, I don't know how you'd know that it was right unless you spent a
lot of money.
For example, it could be the pump in the transmission, which is weak.
Oh, so you think it's a transmission, huh?
I don't think so.
I do.
Oh, I think it's definitely engine.
I think the thing.
You do.
Yeah, it's starved for fuel.
So while it certainly could be the fuel, when you said pump, I said it could be the fuel
pump.
And I'm sure Rich has tested the pump.
I'm sure Rich has replaced the gas filter.
I have his invoice and job description here that he type checked it.
He checked it from Miss Bellings.
He grabbed it from me.
And when I told him, I might talk to Click and Clack.
Well, what can he check?
Okay, let's hear it.
All right.
We test drove the vehicle and found that at approximately 2200 RPM, the vehicle hesitates
for several seconds.
We checked for stored fault codes, and there were none stored.
We tested fuel pressure to see if the hesitation was caused by improper fuel pressure, but
there was no fluctuation in fuel pressure.
He writes well.
He has a career in journalism, I can say.
We then checked back pressure at each catalytic converter, both of which, by the way, I have
replaced since I bought the car.
Yeah, it wouldn't be the cats.
That cost you a couple of bucks, didn't it?
Oh.
Well, you know something?
The Buicks don't have those.
Yeah.
Go ahead.
Okay, continue.
We reviewed all current Audi service bulletins to see if this was a known problem, and there
were no bulletins that referred to this runability problem.
Well, first of all, the first thing I notice here is that his description of the problem
is not the same as yours.
You said, and I'm reading from the court notes here, you said, when you start off from
He says this doesn't happen until 2200 RPM.
At 2200 RPM, you should have already accelerated.
Does this happen from a dead stop or after you build it?
I object.
I think you're bashing it with this.
You wanted to try the glove on next.
Permission to treat the wisdom says hostile.
Does this happen from a dead stop or doesn't it?
It happens from both.
If I started a dead stop, it happens, and it will happen at a yield sign.
So are you calling rich a liar?
So this is already dramatic enough to go public like this.
Okay, it is.
I can see that you've buried your soul here and exposed yourself to, so to speak, to ridicule
from dad, even more than you not deserve, but more than you've gotten.
Okay, the answer is we don't know, but I'm going to give you one shot at it.
Only because my wife has an Audi.
And she experienced a similar problem to the one that Rich described, not the one that
you described, Barry.
And she went to the dealer.
They had no idea what was wrong with it.
And she yelled and screamed at them like she yells and screams at me.
No, she didn't.
I yelled and screamed at them.
And I'll tell you what it was.
Too cold to sleep with the garage this time of year, isn't it?
I mean, because the dealership couldn't figure it out, they went to the zone manager.
It so happened that the zone manager had exactly the same problem with his car.
And even though her car is not the same year as yours, here's what it was.
The transmission computer.
The car has an engine computer and a transmission computer.
They replaced the transmission computer and it fixed it.
So that's a long shot because it's not, I don't even know that your car has this
transmission computer because yours is not a 93.
But if we're trying to get the job done for free, this is your only shot.
You've got to go to Rich and say, they didn't really know either, but how about this?
And you're going to have to make a deal with them that if he replaces the transmission computer
and it works, he pays for it.
And if he replaces it and it doesn't work, you're going to have to pay for it.
And leave me the hell out of it.
Right.
And me too.
Good luck, Mary.
Thanks, fellas.
Good luck.
Thanks.
Wouldn't you really rather have a Buick?
See you later.
Thanks for calling, Mary.
And let us know.
All right.
Please let us know.
I'll call back.
Okay, great.
Thanks, fellas.
Good luck.
Bye-bye.
Well, it's happened again.
You've misappropriated it.
Another perfectly good hour listening to car talk.
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I've been very dissociative, so that's a problem for my future therapist.
Yeah, I see.
Let's talk about the fact you're not in therapy.
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Sometimes.
Yeah.
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Next to the P section.
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About this episode
Tom and Ray Magliozzi kick off with a hilarious Onion article about public transit before diving into caller diagnostics. Paul from Aspen seeks help for his 1991 Nissan Maxima, which makes a bizarre, duck-like croaking sound only under specific braking conditions, leading to a warped rotor diagnosis. Later, Becca from Minneapolis describes a frightening shudder in her 1995 Jeep Grand Cherokee after long highway drives. The brothers pinpoint a failing viscous coupling in her four-wheel-drive system, explaining how heat causes the system to bind during tight turns.
Original notes
Rob’s family cross-country vacation has turned into a disaster: Black smoke is pouring out of the back of the car, transmission fluid is pouring out from under the hood, his mother-in-law is giving him dopeslaps from the back seat and the only help within 20 miles is a place called “Bozo’s Garage”. Could things possibly get any worse? Find out on this episode of the Best of Car Talk.
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