Episode 16: Oh My God The Banks Are Out Of Oil
Annotations will appear as you listen
0:00
89:46
Term
engine oil
Engine oil is the fluid your car’s engine uses to keep moving parts from grinding against each other. It also helps keep the engine cool and protected.
Term
lighter weight oil
Lighter weight oil is thinner oil that flows more easily, especially when the engine is cold. The tradeoff is it has to still protect the engine when things get hot.
Term
base oil
Base oil is the main ingredient that gets refined and then mixed with other chemicals to make the final engine oil. The additives are what give engine oil its special protective behavior.
Term
viscosity
Viscosity is basically how “thick” or “runny” a fluid is. For engine oil, thickness matters because it affects how well the oil lubricates parts, especially when the engine is hot.
Term
octane rating
Octane rating is about how resistant gasoline is to pinging/knocking in the engine. The hosts are using it as a comparison point for how oil properties are rated.
Term
Group III
Base oils get grouped based on how they’re refined. Group III oils are generally considered better at staying consistent when things get hot, which is why they’re often recommended for engine oil.
Car
Ford Mustang
The Ford Mustang is a sports car made by Ford. It’s known for a distinctive front end and a sporty look. People talk about it a lot because it’s one of the most recognizable American performance cars.
Car
Toyota Crown
The Toyota Crown is a nicer, more premium Toyota car. It’s meant to be comfortable and higher-end compared with basic everyday models. In the podcast, it’s mentioned as a “top” or “valuable” thing, not as a detailed car review.
Car
Toyota Corolla
The Toyota Corolla is a small, everyday car. It’s popular because it’s usually reliable and not too expensive to keep running. That’s why it comes up when people talk about cars that can handle a lot.
Term
group three
“Group three” is a type of base oil—basically a specific grade of raw oil used to make engine oil. If there’s not enough of that grade, it can limit the engine oils that can be produced.
Term
0w16
0W-16 is the label on engine oil that tells you how it behaves when it’s cold and when the engine is hot. Lower numbers usually mean the oil flows more easily, which can help efficiency—but it may be harder to get during supply shortages.
Term
lightweight oils
Lightweight oils are thinner engine oils that reduce friction. If the supply chain can’t make enough of the specific thin oil a car needs, you can see shortages.
Term
intensive refinement
Intensive refinement means the oil has to be processed more heavily to reach the right quality. If that processing capacity is limited, certain engine oils can run short.
Term
turbo cars
Turbo cars have a turbocharger that helps the engine make more power. Because they can run hotter and work harder, they may need specific types of engine oil to protect the engine.
Term
substitutes
They’re talking about swapping in different oil ingredients or sources when supply is tight. But you can’t always just replace one oil with another without meeting the same requirements.
Term
certification
“Certification” here refers to formal approval that an oil meets required standards for performance and safety. For automakers and lubricant blenders, certification matters because it limits what can be substituted when base-oil supply changes.
Concept
oil supply chain stress
They’re talking about how problems upstream—like where oil ingredients come from—can affect the engine oil you buy. That can mean shortages and higher prices.
Concept
accelerationism
Accelerationism is a belief that things should get worse faster instead of being stopped. In this conversation it’s more of a metaphor than something about driving a car.
Car
BMW F30
BMW F30 is a specific generation of the BMW 3 Series. When people say “F30,” they usually mean the 2012–2015-era cars.
Car
BMW M3
The BMW M3 is a fast, performance-focused BMW sedan. It’s made to drive more aggressively than a regular 3 Series. People who care about cars often talk about it because it’s built for speed and handling.
Car
BMW X5 M
The BMW X5 M is a sportier, higher-performance version of the BMW X5 SUV. It’s the “M” model, which usually means it’s tuned for quicker driving and more aggressive handling.
Car
Hyundai Ioniq
The Hyundai Ioniq is a Hyundai car that’s designed around electric or hybrid-style driving. In the podcast, it’s mentioned because someone was looking at leasing one to replace another car. The key point is that it was on their short list for a practical replacement.
Car
Kia EV6
The Kia EV6 is an electric car, meaning it runs on electricity instead of gasoline. It’s styled to look sporty and modern. The podcast brings it up as an EV option if you want a more exciting-looking car.
Car
Byd Shark 6
The BYD Shark 6 is a car that’s known for a bold, unusual look. In the podcast, it’s brought up because it’s visually striking compared to more typical designs. The main point is the design and how it stands out.
Car
Hyundai Elantra
The Hyundai Elantra is a compact car meant for everyday driving. In the podcast, the speaker says their first Elantra helped in a serious situation, implying it was safe and dependable. It’s being mentioned as a personal, real-life experience.
Car
Ioniq 6
The Ioniq 6 is Hyundai’s electric car. Here, the big point is that a safety recall is preventing dealers from selling some cars until it’s fixed.
Term
safety recall
A safety recall means the company says there’s a safety problem in certain cars. Until it’s fixed, dealers may be told not to sell them.
Term
seat belt might just detach
This refers to a potential seat-belt hardware failure where the belt could separate from its mounting point. That’s a serious safety issue because the seat belt is the primary restraint system in a crash.
Term
stop sale recall
A stop sale recall means dealers are told not to sell certain cars. The cars can be stuck on the lot until the problem is fixed.
Car
Ford Fusion
The Ford Fusion is a regular, everyday car in the mid-size category. In the podcast, it’s mentioned because the suspension (specifically the shocks) had issues. Shocks help the car ride smoothly, so damaged shocks can make the ride rough.
Part
shocks
Shocks are parts that help smooth out bumps and keep the ride from feeling bouncy or harsh. The host is saying even a car with bad shocks felt better than the Tesla they were comparing it to.
Car
Bmw I4
The BMW i4 is an electric car from BMW. It’s designed to feel like a more premium sedan while using electricity instead of gasoline. The podcast mentions it mainly because it costs more to lease than some alternatives.
Term
EV
EV means electric vehicle. It’s a car that runs on electricity from a battery instead of using gasoline.
Car
2016 BMW M2
The 2016 BMW M2 is a small BMW sports car that’s famous for feeling connected to the road. The speaker is saying it’s the last BMW they felt really “got it” before later BMWs felt less engaging.
Car
Porsche Taycan
The Porsche Taycan is Porsche’s electric performance car. The speaker brings it up to say the Ioniq 6 is being compared to Porsche’s EV in terms of how it drives.
Car
Nissan Leaf
The Nissan Leaf is one of the best-known electric cars. The speaker is basically saying that even the Leaf doesn’t feel like the kind of EV shape they want anymore.
Car
Nissan Juke
The Nissan Juke is a small crossover. The speaker is using it to make the point that more models are being reshaped into crossovers.
Car
Lucid Air
The Lucid Air is a luxury electric sedan. They’re bringing it up as an alternative because they feel like sedan choices are getting scarce.
Car
Audi Etron
Audi e-tron is Audi’s name for its electric cars. The speaker is using it as one of the EV options they’re considering.
Car
Toyota Gr86
The Toyota GR 86 is a small sports car from Toyota. It’s meant to be fun to drive, with power sent to the rear wheels. People like it because it feels light and easy to enjoy.
Concept
E15 fuel
E15 is a type of gasoline mixed with ethanol (a plant-based alcohol). Because it’s a different fuel blend than regular gas, it can affect how efficiently your car uses fuel.
Term
miles per gallon
Miles per gallon (MPG) tells you how efficiently a car uses fuel. If MPG goes down, you have to buy more gas to drive the same distance.
Term
ethanol-based fuels
Some gas blends include ethanol, which can make your car go fewer miles on the same amount of fuel. That’s why people often talk about ethanol blends affecting gas mileage.
Term
cvt
CVT means a transmission that can change “gears” smoothly rather than jumping between set gears. In this segment, the speaker feels the car is getting less responsive over time, and they blame it on the CVT behavior.
Car
Dodge Charger
The Dodge Charger is a car that’s built to feel powerful and sporty. It has a bold, aggressive design and comes in performance versions. People mention it a lot when they talk about fast American cars.
Car
Aston Martin Valhalla
The Aston Martin Valhalla is a very expensive, high-performance sports car. It’s the kind of car people talk about as a “dream” vehicle because it’s rare and built for speed. In the podcast, it’s mentioned in an excited, aspirational way rather than as an everyday option.
LIVE
That was a low yeah
And welcome to episode 16 of trend girlies moe. I am your host Victoria Scott my pronouns are she and her
I am here with like the most. Oh, yeah, it's uh, it's a the most Monday of Friday as we
Record this has ever felt. Hi. My name is Jordan Hofstetter my pronouns are she and her um
You might be wondering why Vicki and I
Feel bad why we just feel bad um
this past week a
An undergrad at the
University of Washington, right?
Was a trans student was murdered while just trying to do her laundry and
as
You know, we're both transplants to our current cities where we moved for a
better safer life and
I
just I
Know we have a ton of cis listeners and I've been thinking about what should I say to you and I
Just want
Everyone who listens and maybe this is your like
You know, I don't know based on our listeners media diet
This is not the only show with trans people you listen to if my if our auto-generated recommendations of other shows to listen to
is any
is any
Evidence there we go, but you know
Hate crimes are a real category because there's no
Sensible reason other than the hate in one's heart to do an act like this and just snuff out a a
19 year old girl a 19 year old girl's life who had a
Yeah
The other thing that I was just gonna throw into is that like part of what makes this
Part of what makes being trans in the current media environment difficult is that not only is a 19 year old girl who presumably like
From what I could tell her whole family loves her everybody loves her. She was a wonderful ray of sunshine. She loved Pokemon
Like not only is she gone?
Partially because you know the our current society makes violence against trans people acceptable
But then I have to and every trans person has to go through every article about her death and watch them
Degender her or pretend that it was you know in some way
Maybe it wasn't as valuable her life wasn't as valuable as other people's because she was trans or tried to remove her identity
As a factor while at the same time, you know running on the page opposite
They're talking about you know whether detransitioning kids is actually a good strategy because like now, you know, Texas has got a
Detransition wing and their children's hospital in Houston and you know
I was a source this week for a great article that Gwen Howerton did about trans people fleeing Texas
I think that Jordan and I both did
There's just like there are these massive social pressures going on right now that can kill us
that don't get treated the same way as
It would for any other group of people and it's the systemic
Devaluation of our lives on top of the fact that we keep getting like killed that really is what makes it difficult to like
You know find out about this girl read these articles that treat her like, you know
Like just some nameless like, you know random victim that you know nobody, you know
It just it's just
Depersonalizing and because it's so consistent even in places that are supposed to be safe like you're at my home of Seattle
It just drives me insane
And you know, I think there's going to be a lot of litigation in the coming weeks as to whether or not this but you know
Truly hits the definition of a hate crime
Or whether Texas is really all that bad for trans people or and the thing is is like if you're cisgender and you're listening
The main thing that I would say is please just listen to us when we talk about it
Generally speaking like trans people who have lived with the discrimination of having been in Texas or
Having seen their siblings get murdered for the whole time that they're out
Generally have some insight that says people don't and so instead of litigating whether or not we are grieving or
Having anxiety about the dangers of our lives correctly. Just maybe like listen to us
That's that's yeah, that's all it needs to be said because yeah, I am
It's been it feels like this is the the weird culmination of a couple of weeks of
Me watching a bunch of my friends get told that they are complaining about issues too loud
for sis for sis comfort and
you know, I
Feel like this is the
Last I you know, I try I am more of a I love you to death Victoria
I am more of a positive person usually overall
But like, you know, it's just been
It's just been one of those weeks that really
Goes to show that no matter
who you are if
You were trans of any sort that is going to color every little bit of your life and also
every little bit of your death if you are
so caught up in a
new cycle and a tragedy and
Yeah
Rest in peace that you never blessing. Yeah, she just well the vigil will be after this episode before this episode comes out
but she truly it's
I'm not a huge believer in nominative determinism, but
You know by all accounts. She was a blessing to everyone. She knew and that's
The way she should be remembered
All right, well there yeah, you want to talk about cars
We've had an episode that starts as a complete doubter so now we are really truly in everyone
Take a moment push the glasses up. Just just touch your eyes. Just go to the shapes place for a second
It'll be fine. We can reset and also like, you know, genuinely
I think the thing that I would say to trans people is like I
Struggle with this constantly. So I'm saying this is a reminder to people who are listening and
Myself in equal amounts, but like you should let yourself mourn when things that are horrible happen to our community
I feel like because we get heckled constantly that we're not mourning or not like being politically proactive enough
Or not like being the correct kind of sad or you know
Anxious or posting incorrect or whatever that we all hyperscrutinize ourselves and we're like, well, it's not productive to be sad
At least I do that
No, you should just like be sad go to vigils if you know somebody that in your community dies like it's just it's it
It's
Sometimes feeling sad is the point. It's anyway comes free with you being human. Yeah
The only see here's the thing I I've got a segue now
Oh, we can get back into we can get back into trying to
Have fun despite it all because you know, so here's the thing I
Might I don't really like America very much. I don't know if you know this Jordan not a big fan of the government Victoria. Yeah
Um, I think the the crimes of this guilty land can never be purged. No
But I have good news, which is that if you also hate America
We might not have to deal with it much longer
You should you should go to the bank right now and take out all of your oil immediately
Hurry because the banks are going to run out of oil. Yeah. Yeah. I just go to the bank
I know we have a lot of fun here and joke about a consumer advice actual consumer advice if you need
Engine oil for the next
Victoria just want to throw 12 months if you need engine oil
You think you need an oil change in the next year and a half go buy your oil fucking right now. Oh
God, especially if you use a lighter weight oil
Because here's the thing right it's like and again, this is you vw pervert
I'm just I'm just taking my glasses off. Yeah for the next several minutes as I go to the shapes place because you know
In the same vein that being a trans person requires you to be politically active and aware in order to navigate like
Being alive in the most basic forms in this country. Yeah
Being a car enthusiast increasingly means that you have to become a petrochemicals and geopolitics expert
So
There was somebody who made up a post on Twitter where they were like
I own an oil change place and all the banks are out of oil go to the bank and take out all your oil right now
And I was like, that's not true. This is just some guy on x.com the everything app who's got an entrepreneur brain
So I was like, well, I'm gonna do some digging and it turned out what I had to first learn
Was Jordan do you have a base oil is I am a listener of well
There's your problem and engineering podcast beat beat beat with slides. So yes
I am I am familiar with what a base oil is also. I was raised in the Houston area
Which means most of our natural history museum is oil based and paid for so
All right, well oil based does apply the existence of oil cringe as well, and I think oil cringe is
Is this entire American moment actually?
Well, so first in order for people who are not aware of what a base oil is first we have to ask what is oil
I should get a drinks. Well, there's your problem. You're right. You're right Victoria
I should get a patreon stretch goal thousand paying subscribers a month
I will get a drinks. Well, maybe not a trap stamp, but I'll get a drinks. I'll steal that bit from while there's your problem
You can brand my flesh with drinks. Well
I mean, I feel like they at what you can take the the girl out of Texas
But you can't take the Texas out of the girl that would be a really good bit
Um, but you know as you know oil is actually a very loose term
There isn't really one thing that's oil
We just use the word oil to describe basically anything that can be refined from raw petroleum that is pulled from the earth
And when you refine this raw petroleum which
Oh my god
refinement is heating that is a wildly like criminal over simplification
But there is that other show that i'm on that I wrote an entire episode about the texas city disaster
Like down the street from Houston. Hello beat people. Oh, yeah. She uh, she knows mama. She knows bomb is having a rough one
so therefore it is uh
Record time to her throwing herself on me like baby
Like a little baby. She also loves oil apparently. Ow. Ow. Hey
Yeah, so basically heat it uh, that's not entirely true
But like watch the texas city disaster episode of well, there's your problem that I wrote about oil refining to like know how this actually works
um
Basically you separate the petroleum into like heavy and light hydrocarbons
Your your light hydrocarbons come to the top and they become like gasoline and paraffin and stuff like that
And your heavier stuff becomes bitumans bitumans. Yeah
And and base oils
Um
And the base oils what we're interested in here because that's like that gets turned into uh stuff that you would I guess kind of
conceptualize of is oil in your head
Um, those base oils are split into five categories by the american petroleum institute
um, normal guys groups
really parties
Honestly, they probably do know how to throw a rager they got so much money
I've got so much money and they've successfully convinced everyone that uh
No one at chevron should have got to jail after we realized that they do about climate change in the 70s
Anyways, yeah
Um
So they're they're these these are just called, you know groups one through five. Oh no
Beep beep injury beep beep uh beep beep has uh is front declawed but not back to declawed
I would have never declawed a cat. That's not my choice. She's a rescue
Uh, but she doesn't understand when her back claws are out because of the lack of front claws
So therefore, uh, I wearing a low cut top does mean occasionally my collarbone will just get fucking shredded when beep beep jumps off me
Base oils. Yeah, uh-huh base oils. Just just beep beep every thoughts on base oil
No, she said fuck this
My friends
My friends keep giving me shit for this being last week tonight with gay girls john oliver and i'm the base oil thing really
I was like, yeah, no, no getting hard to deny. No, it was uh, it was our first episode where you were talking to like financial people
uh
And stella was immediately like
Oh, you are just kind of doing gay girls john oliver and I was just like fucking as long as it
As long as it works, right?
Yeah, you made the episode that I called an economist and an accountant
Well, I didn't know any oil people just because probably they'd find my politics pretty difficult to get along with
um
Since it's my my opinions on chevron are pretty rough. Uh, if you work for chevron
Um
Anyway, we have groups one through five. I don't care. We don't care about groups four and five
We're interested in the first three basic groups here because those are categorized the most straightforward way
They are it's based on saturate and sulfur content and their viscosity index
Um, jordan, do you know what a viscosity index is?
Is that is that just the number weight of oils?
Not quite. Um, so the the way that viscosity index works is it's a relationship of the oil's viscosity to heat
So the higher the number from like it's like a scale
It was originally a scale from zero to a hundred and then they invented better oils
So now it's just zero to whatever they feel like cool. Um
Uh, but like basically the higher the number the more consistent the oil is as it is heated
So like, you know, a shitty oil is going to get really thin and watery when it gets really hot
An oil that's going to be you want to actually put in a car engine is going to stay thick and like lube
As the friction increases there's a lot more motion in there. Um, it's a much more durable lube
And those are what you're going to want to put uh inside
Do you think we can get a slick with sponsorship assemblies?
I just I just sorry just throw in ideas out there just as just played some loose word association here
um, um, so it's kind of like it's like octane rating but for like
Oil not to not to really oversimplify it, but like I know I know what octane rating does
Yeah
Yes, yeah, it's it's similar
And so that basically your group three oils that you're going to be the ones that have the highest uh viscosity index
Are the ones you're going to want to put in the car engine. Um, and this is relevant
Um, because and this is where this that was like, uh, yeah, I'm not the origin these allegations
So a friend of mine who actually made the joke post where
She did our logo our name. Yeah, just in the john oliver font
Um, she was sitting on the couch
Uh, and like sort of looking over at me as I did research and I was like, ooh
The independent lubricant manufacturers association. This should be a good source and she started cabling
Um, I so according to ilma ilma or the independent lubricant manufacturers association
showing up as a like
Listeners, this is about to get crass for a second. So like, you know, I'm gonna just I want to show up with just
purporting to be
bad dragon
And I just wrote it. I'm like, why is my cumblube not allowed in this lube manufacturers association?
Am I not legitimate for you?
I still cumblube at the mall. Did I tell you this? What? I was really high in the mall with my co-worker charlotte
Uh
And we were at a spencer's gifts because we were being adult teenagers
And anyway, my mom would never spencers has such mystique in my mind because like in the era that I went to a mall as like a
Pre-teen early teenager
I wasn't allowed to go unaccompanied obviously because I was raised in the vault
My mom would never even let me look at spencers. No, I imagined that I couldn't even walk in
They'll they'll sell you a bong and a vibrator. Yeah, that place is evil to moms. Yeah
To be fair, I still feel too old and too young to be in a spencer
Simultaneously, it does give me like a weird like my mom's gonna find out energy
But uh, they have just fake fantasy dildos there now
Uh, that's that's where that's at the mall and also. Yeah, they were just selling
knockoff cum lube at at the spencer's which
I bought a halo t-shirt. So that's
where I'm at
I I can't imagine going to the mall to buy cum lube like
I I am pretty open about like, you know
Having sexuality being interested in things
But the idea of going taking a trip specifically to the mall and walking out with cum lube is a little bit too much
Well, you also you're going to auntie and you're maybe hitting up the cinnabon
If you're be you're for sure going to lush because you know what listeners your girl smells good and soft all the time
Uh, but yeah, no the ball is a wonderland
It's spashing a cinnabon. It's sort of the grill of the Mustang. Just try to you got to eat somebody
You're gonna die in here
Holding a device in my hand that starts clicking when I when I hold it near jordan. It's my white woman detector. Oh, yeah, absolutely
Absolutely
Um, anyway, uh now ilma does not deal with cum lube. That would be a different base oil. Um
Yes, I did that as you took a sip of monster. I was gonna see if I could
I should have seen if we could cover the widest emotional range possible in this episode. Um
but
ilma does deal with uh
groups one through five base oils
And so 44 of the us supplies of group three base oils according to ilma come from the persian gulf
Um, now you might be familiar with the persian gulf from that place in the news
uh
Currently that oil is basically stuck
um
To make matters worse uh according to ilma 30 000 barrels per day of group three base oils used in the us come from a single
Shell gas to liquid plant and cutter
They got yoinked by a shahead in february
Um, it's going to take at least until 2027 to get it back online granted
It is only they had to shut the whole thing down. It was only half destroyed. They have like two units
So presumably there's like some output it could make
But it's still going to take a year to get that back to full capacity. I was reading on shell's website
This is like the crown jewel of their gas to liquid operations in the whole world. Um, so this was a very, you know
Again once again around running up the scoreboard with like
You know 4000000000 dollar gas to liquid
Like crown jewel of shell refining plant and cutter
$30,000 shahead just ramming, you know junk yard Toyota corollas into Rolls Royces all day long
I don't want to hand it to
The ayatollah
Come on, but don't have to come up by it. It's pretty funny dog
At every single stop oil protester on earth versus one shahead drone
And you know on top of this it actually all gets um even worse
As of january this year 55% of our group three base oils came via the middle east so higher than historical average
And that primarily came from cutter
The united amerits and Bahrain and all of those require the straight of hormones to ship oil
And you know, I mean, I think it was cutter that was like we're going to build a pipeline or whatever
But like that's going to take a long time and also again
You can just lob 30 000 drones at this shit all day long. They're all right there like Iran is right next door
They have ridiculous terrain. They can just keep doing this forever. Uh-huh
um
It's almost like this was a bad idea and there's a reason the united states has never like
It despite the immense
Like islamophobic bloodlust of every politician in america. There's a reason nobody else ever tried this and it's because
We could not win it
Unless you're willing to like basically nuke iran and wipe it off the face of the earth
Which I pray to fucking god nobody in our administration is anyway, which even then like okay cool
He's still probably lose. Yeah. Yeah, cool. You've made yourself the uh nuclear pariah state
Which I would argue maybe we should have been since like, I don't know the 40s, but like, you know, I um
Oh boy, uh
It's so it's so funny
It's just so funny of just like uh every single
Every single week in 2026 and 2025 with
between tariffs and this and any of our other
Misadventures you've had to learn so much about global logistics
like
the de minimis rule like
I didn't have to think about that shit for years and now it's just like oh
What do you mean everything has tariffs now? What do you mean? We were just getting that shit waived
Donald trump is perhaps, uh, one of the greatest people in the world to ever help americans understanding of what commodity fetishism is
And how to undo it by making them appreciate the miracle of modern logistics
Uh, it turns out that no matter how many apps you put in the way and how how much you try to push humans out of the equation
People do have to make the things that you get you can't gig economy your way out of this one bucko. Yeah, it's uh
this is
I
I also the first time I saw that like thread of like this guy going like i'm
Oh, well, you don't know anything about all this oil not being available and this guy hitting back with the perfect ready to screenshot to own
conservatives online of just like I have the largest single oil
oil buyer in the east coast or whatever, but it's just like
yeah, uh
Yeah, I uh
Maybe it's bad to have one crown jewel plant where we could do this not arguing for more oil infrastructure
But like it's one of those things where you just go like oh
We just build so many things hoping that none of this bullshit happens and then when it happens
We just don't have an answer. That's cool. That's really cool. Do you remember?
Do you remember the pandemic? I try not to
I also again never stopped still going on
We were basket outside kids
Um
Yeah, if you remember that at all, uh, the hantavirus pandemic. Yeah, I'm familiar. It's coming. Yeah, I oh god
Please I beg you to step away from the lead. I've I've been like hantavirus isn't real. It can't hurt you
It's not gonna be that big a deal and then every time I think that rfk jr. Says something about like, oh, we have it under control
And I'm like, oh god, we're all fucked. Oh my god. Yeah. He's I
Oh my god, you could you could probably
Like power a small city with the heat from my blood when I think about that man
Yeah, uh, just because how mad he makes me but in any case like everything ever the part of the reason that the
You know the pandemic was so
Eye-opening at least for me was like that it illustrated the fragility of like modern systems that have very little to almost no slack built into them
If you remember if you tried to buy a car
in the past six years
Um cars got really cheap for like a hot second
Uh right at the beginning of the pandemic because nobody was buying anything
And then they got very expensive for like several years afterward and really have never kind of come back down
And part of that is like economic pressures of like redistribution of wealth from the poor to the wealthy
But part of that was also because everybody went through a supply shock
Because really there's very little slop built into modern supply chains because that is lost profit
Like if you're making things you're not selling immediately. Why would you do that?
This is again an oversimplification not every system is like this, but generally speaking it is like
It is more
Profitable and a if you assume nothing ever goes wrong if you were like, you know, a spherical cow and a vacuum minded
Um
You you would rather have like one big plant than a bunch of small ones like to do more logistics with like that's
Generally how things tend to work. I would say um, and that seems to be biting us in the ass again
Who could have or could have foreseen this happening? Uh again
Just the the ever given getting stuck
Uh
In 2021 was truly one of the greatest like ah
That was the primer the world gave us so we would be familiar with this situation when when 2026 rolled around. Um
I
I'm feeling gas cars might be getting real cheap again here, so
Not for great reasons, but like, you know, uh
Well, so I have a great quote. So this is when my friend at the couch really started cackling was I was like
Ooh
This source looks good jobbers world market intelligence for intelligent lubricant marketers
Um
Which is really one of those reeds like wow, there really are especially publications for everything
Do you think I will say jobbers world did really good research? I think they sell t-shirts
Are you familiar with the wrestling term jobber?
No, that's what I've been thinking about job a jobber is one of those guys who's like do you need
It John Cena is visiting pencil tucky and he needs a big w in front of this nothing crowd
So they could go. Oh my god. I saw John Cena pin a guy
Uh the the no-name guys you fight like the champ to get just fucking jobbed out immediately
Are called jobbers because that's yeah
I didn't know that I'm I am one of the only trans woman who doesn't seem to be into like
Wrestling it's not like a I think it seems cool. It's kind of like it's theater kid
Stuff and then I understand that I was adjacent, but I wasn't allowed it in the vault
So I probably would have gotten into it if I were if I would have been allowed to but like that was just no go
Because it was like too violent. Uh-huh. My mom barely let me watch battle bots as a kid
Like I had to beg for that one
I
I actually don't know what I actually didn't know what to say because I I um
It's not nice to be mad at dead people
Uh for how they treated your friends
Uh
No, you can be mad at my dad. I am mad at your dead mom. Uh, I think that lady sucked. Sorry
Oh god, I just every now and then I'm like, oh
You turned out so cool for someone so sheltered
Um, anyway, according to jobbers world market intelligence for intelligent lubricant marketers
In contrast to group one and two group three pricing is rising in a less predictable manner driven primarily by severe tightening of availability
Unless you have strong contacts for group three, you're not gonna find it one blender reported a sentiment widely echoed across the industry
end quote
um
According to ilma, they expect the us base oil market, especially for
You know group three to remain under sustained pressure until at least 2027
And again, that assumes everything was fixed tomorrow, which it's probably not going to
There's like like jp morgan put out that thing where they were like we expect the oil market to return to normal at the beginning of june
We'll assume june 1st for simplicity
I think I think where they're trying to get it from that is like the political pressure will hit a point that trump will
Come to his senses and stop doing this and accept whatever terms the iranians ask for but I think the thing is is that like
One even if even if trump were rational, which like his brain is melted every time he speaks
the
like
The israelis also like are part of this iran wants him to stop striking lebanon and they won't do that
So like that's that is already a difficult situation if you are a you know
rabid republican and you're like well
aid to israel is kind of like the the third rail of our like
um
Platform and has been for what 30 40 years at this point. I don't even 60 years
It's yeah, it's outside of like it's it so there's that part outside of his control and also again
He's losing his mind and I think again, you know, so much of like the modern world is you shouldn't need like
The average person shouldn't need to know like that this one crown jewel plant in cutter is how they get to put
0w16 in their new toyota because like those are what I'm seeing shortages
That's what like there's toyota service bulletins that like like lightweight oils that require
Like intensive refinement
Because they are so chemically advanced which happens to be like a lot of modern turbo cars require that to function
You know, that's what we're gonna stay so short of just they might be able to do like substitutes
I know that like ilmo was talking about
Uh, but a consortium of oil manufacturers are going to gm to talk about like hey
Can we like do substitutes and still get like uh, whatever the gm?
Certification is for oils
So like I don't it is impossible to say how much of this you see immediately
It probably means that like things will just cost more money
Um, things will be harder to find you might not be able to just like things might not magically appear
uh, and like
Everybody's life is so stressful in the u.s. They shouldn't really need to think about this
But also at the same time like the modern world kind of
This isn't really a sustainable way to run things anyway. So I don't know it's
I I think I think where I really at is
Well here, let's just put it like this
um
Ilma CEO holly alfano noted to cnbc in an article that was very good
But clearly had an editor on it who was like we got to put like a spin on this and so it's all about like supercars and it's like
This this impacts more than like super car owners
Do you not understand how car oil works and the rest of the article was written from a perspective where they did
It's just like the first paragraph where the hook is I was like, oh, yeah, that's a dipshit editor who got in there
And was like, oh, yeah, we got to change this
but uh
Because because most of americans group three oils that don't come from the gulf come from south korea
They get all of their input crude from the persian gulf
So she noted that uh, quote these dynamics are placing nearly three quarters of us group three imports under stress
She added that compounding the risk we are entering hurricane season
Even a single storm impacting the gulf coast could take up 30 to 40 percent of us group two capacity
And it initial 10 percent of group three
I like the sirens in the background of my
that really just like
this is just I mean like
It's just one of those things where it's like you can't you cannot like
Build a world this fragile with this little like fallback capacity and then like just be like every
Assume the spherical cow is happy in the vacuum. It's really fucking sick how no one learned anything from 2020
It's a really fucking incredible how no one learned a single goddamn thing
And this isn't even like a oh, you know, it takes a long time for these like really entrenched systems to pivot like no
It's been six years like I know and granted this isn't like another like
active god quote unquote thing this is like
We saw
we saw
a hornet's nest
And president deals decided to put both hands on it and just shake it
And now we're all getting stoned because president deals has the wasp nest still well
And like south korea stopped doing a bunch of their oil exports because they were trying to preserve like this is this is just
Absolutely walloping the entire world and so like if you were asking me like hey vicki
If you were gonna like try to decarbonize the earth, would you uh, you know
Just stop oil overnight uh from the persian gulf
I'd probably like no because this will cause a lot of harm
But I mean maybe this will like maybe we can fix the hurricane problem by destroying the oil market
Donald trump is the greatest political accelerationist we have ever seen and I don't think it's a good thing
I think this is you better start believing
Acceleration I think it's like I yeah, I think this is like wow the accelerationists did have sub points
I just still think you're all fucking assholes
Like you're all horrid bricks, but you've got a point. Yeah like
It is it is also one of those things where it's like, you know
Accelerationism only works if you think other people aren't real and their deaths don't matter
But also at a certain point your hand is just forced and you're like well shit
I mean at this point your best hope is to keep your foot down because we might make it over
The bridge out if you hit the brakes now, we're just gonna go directly off the canyon wily coyote style
Um, anyway, I just wanted to make a note here
Uh shout out to the guy on bimmer posts f80 specific forum
Who saw this shit coming literally a over a month ago?
Uh, he apparently I don't know who this like I don't know like
What this guy oh, sorry that f a f 30. I I always screw up which ones are which
The it's the it's the like 2012 to 2015 three series. Uh, this post is from tejas 1836 on
Uh, what that guy's on march 31st
And he was like, uh, hey go to the store. They're gonna run out of oil
You should stock up on oil right now
I guess he would just like was in the oil industry and was actually reading jobbers world because like this has
Like it this feels again like the pandemic in the kind of way where it's like cnbc is like this might mess up
Supercar or oil owner changes and nobody else will be affected and every specialist publication is like, oh my god
The sky is falling and it's on fire
I it's like how no I just I was just like this is uh
The amount of like weird websites you have to go to to get the action. It's one of those things where I'm just like
Maybe mainstream media has is bad. I don't know. I try to like I
I maybe took too many journalism at rtf classes, but I'm like, no, you know what the news
You know, like bolter kronkite the news, you know, like a shared reality and then it's just like, oh
Get the shit out of here. You got to go to you got to go to be over for
And talk to tejas
36 and you know
You know a fucking what a burger cup is in that cup holder of that bmw at all fucking times that guy is
I'm guessing I'm guessing san Antonio or like austin suburbs
Maybe houston, uh, I don't know
It it just he just says location tejas. Yeah
God bless
It drives drives 2023 f95 work master 75. I don't know what that is that a shotgun. There's so many bmw
There's so many bmw codes. What the hell's an f95?
Uh, oh, it's the x5 m
After the facelift
Yeah, okay, so this guy definitely works. Yeah, he sure does he's rocking him if he's rocking a three-year-old x5 m
Well, hey, you know what?
He's smarter than most people who work in mainstream media in the meantime
I will be getting my news from only the most trusted sources
Uh, whiskey fridays with tony doke appeal
Uh, yeah, did you see that tony doke goku pill got kicked out of his hotel room?
In the one in china where he had to like report
He had to he had to take a controversial stance on the one china policy by saying taiwan was close enough
Because he couldn't get a visa
Oh
I think
Everyone in
God bless me. Maybe I should start that's the one that whiskey friday save
Save me whiskey friday
It is we are recording on friday because yesterday we were both sad
So like we could just start drinking whiskey now at 9 47 a.m
Who's to stop us? I think they the banks are out of oil
They do I think they frown upon it if you show up lit on booze to your tattoo appointment
Especially when you're getting a let's just call it a pokemon tattooed on your body
um
Hey, it's a bad it's this news and also the thing i'm about i i'm pissed at the south koreans for other reasons right now
But it really does feel like victim blaming that i'm mad at these south koreans, um
Uh
Yeah, what victoria we fucked up the evi burk. It's so fucking bad
Uh
So remember how last week I I teased that we might have a new car
Yeah, so stella and I tried to go lease an Ioniq six because uh, we were trying to replace the centra. We would like another sedan
um
The Ioniq six is nice is pretty the six is pretty it's got its rear wheel drive
Uh, it's it's fun
uh
Like Porsche benchmarked it for the like their evis in terms of like driver uh
Driver engagement and everything so like you know, yeah, we don't want to crossover
We the lease rates are really great. Um
Anyway, so we so we go we we reach out about leasing one because there's one. Uh, there's a 2025 on the uh
On the dealer lot at our local hunday, uh dealership
note, I did say 2025
That will become important later
Uh
So we we give them a call we we wait usually, you know, when you reach out to a dealership they are like
Stabbing each other with pencils to try to be the first one to call you back
Uh, I should have known something was wrong when it took two days and some more product to get them to call us
Uh, that's not good. No one wants to know what's to work anymore. No one wants to lease evis anymore, which that's more true. Um
hunday told us get fucked because uh,
I had apparently completely mr. Forgotten that they're just not bringing the 2026 updated iotic 6 to the us
I actually also when you because you texted me about this
Uh, so I had a sneak preview because you were like i'm gonna just complain about america destroying the ev market
I actually did miss this also
Which is a huge bummer because I like I've recommended this car to people
I the iotic 5 is like if you want a box you get a nyanic 5
If you want the sporty looking box you get an ev6, which is also the ev platform
And if you would like a sedan that is like
Semi-reasonably priced and also like has one of the lowest coefficients of drag of any car you can buy also like really just
I a shark uh like a really striking like design and just like
That beautiful duck tail that came on the came on it and everything like I
They're really pretty they are still bringing the iotic 6 and
Over from now on because the people who want the performance evs are apparently able to order it in limited quantities, which again
I hate how much upmarket you have to go to get treated like a human person who has money
Like this is the shitty you mean you don't want a $70,000 ev with less
I don't want a $70,000 Hyundai
I'm sorry like they're they're good cars
My first car was in elantra and it saved my life and by that
I mean when I got re-rended by someone texting and driving going 45 miles an hour in their suburban
It crumpled in the right ways, which is to say uh was immediately killed, but I was I was fine
Uh I uh that car I was great
um
Yeah, so you know there's there's no there's no more
Brand new sixes. I mean there are still plenty of Ioniq sixes on dealer lots everywhere. So you go like okay
Jordan you you're explaining why you can't couldn't get a 2026, but it sounds like you know
They must be dying to get rid of those remaining 2025s
um
You know and you know the theoretical lease rates are excellent
Like we could be driving that thing for like almost nothing per month genuinely
Victoria do you want to know why yeah that they're all on dealer lots still
And it's not lack of desire I think
There is a very under reported s1 category safety recall on all Ioniq sixes in the u.s
Right now because you know what might happen the fucking seat belt might just detach
Pretty normal
Probably that it's the fucking I think you should leave steering wheel falling off
But like the number one bit of safety equipment in most cars might just detach
And they don't have a fix yet. So they're just fucking all sitting there
Uh, so they can't they have to just sit there. Yeah, they can't sell it. It is a stop sale recall. So
Oh my god, uh, yeah, it's um
How do you do it's you know, I
explain engineering a car
I know I understand that engineering a car is a very challenging thing and I I have talked to enough engineers to never trivialize it
But how do you make the seat belts fucking fall off? We've had seat belts for
A hundred years
Yeah, at least like in like modern in like normally use three point seat belts for like over half a century. Yeah, um
This then ended with the uh, the Hyundai guy is really trying to
Get my wife to uh, say yes to a five
Um
The the box which I they're kind of cool
But like they drive really boring and they're not really a car person
Yeah, you have to and get the end if you want the car's person
But again, then you're in the 70000 dollar fucking hundae
uh
Category and that's not good. Also
I recognize this is going to be probably wildly unpopular with listeners. Uh, so I apologize
But I don't really understand the point of performance EVs at all
um, they're like
I just I I think I just don't like again this sort of plays into my whole like I I'm no longer kind of wowed by superlatives with cars
It's cool that hundae has made a
5 000 pound box go from zero to 60 in three seconds or whatever and then it can do has drift mode or but like
I don't know drifting without clutch kicking just sounds kind of like
Too much of a simulacra of of like a thing. I really enjoy for me to get into it
I can get that I I get the performance EV thing just because I think that it is a category that we are going to
Have to explore to maintain enthusiasm going forward
Uh, but also like I feel like a lot of the you've just got to make it good to drive
And yeah is if your base model isn't good to drive like the five apparently is I haven't driven one yet
So we'll we'll see we might still we might get browbeat into fucking test driving the crossover for the the tall little hatch
Well, I mean what you had a note in here about other options. Oh, yeah, our other options are genuinely
uh
If we want a sedan
Let's let's just walk through sedans in order from most reasonable price wise to like
the least reasonable like uh
our I guess the
Option that every stupid buyer's guide online would tell you is the tesla bottle three
But hey, would you believe it that the two trans women don't want to fucking tesla?
Especially not a brand new tesla that we were leasing from the fucking shitbag himself
like
And unless car is willing to send me like 500 of those I bought this before elot killed himself stickers
to just sticker bother the entire thing
Like I don't think I can I don't think I could rock for that. Um
Also, they think I mean apparently they drive better now, but every pre like
2025 model three I've ever been in rides like shit. I would rather like a con of stoke. I would rather
Yeah, there was that ford fusion with the the ruined shocks that I talked about being the backup
That was still more comfortable than being in the back of a tesla bottle three and that's
Tesla they're just hateful to be inside. Okay, so next step up
Ioniq six because all of the pole stars are too expensive or they're all crossovers now
Uh, yeah, all right. Who do we have left making sedans?
Get off we we're looking at the stupid BMW i4 which is a way more expensive lease, but it seems like to be the only like
Reasonable analog because I don't think I'm missing that any other like
You know, it's i4 being the basest of all of these ev sedans. Yeah, and then immediately
I've never driven an i4. I haven't driven the new I haven't I it's been so many years since I've been in a three or four series
I will say um every BMW I've been in that's modern. I think this steering is just a
Crime I don't think you're gonna have like a fun time at an i4, but it's probably just like us at an yeah
Like I'm sure the drivetrain is great
The way bm modern bmw has been since like I would say the 2016 m2 is the cutoff for me because that car is literally perfect
Again, I would I need to find out who designed the steering on that car and send them a bouquet because it's
Wonderful. Yeah modern sports car, but everything I've driven after that is like it's really numb and the drivetrain is really fun
So I imagine the drivetrain is really fun and it feels like you're kind of driving through marmalade or something
Where it's sort of like this weird sort of friction that doesn't really have any feedback. Yeah, and like again
Stella and I are coming from a desan centra as our shared car and that's what this would be replacing
so like
I'm a little bit more forgiving of how but like that's why we wanted the Ioniq 6 right is because that is the one that is like
Porsche benchmarked the tycan off of like
Like the performance tycons off how the
Ioniq 6 drove
And I was gonna say like you could get a leaf, but that's an suv now the leaf is an suv now
Um the juke that's coming out is an suv now
We're pessimistic about
Uh, none of the toyota or subaru
Evies are not either crossovers or just heinous pieces of work. Um
The honda, I mean
And the bolt the bolt isn't really a hatchback anymore either. They've made them all suvs. Uh-huh if you want a sedan
I it's the choices are brutal
Um
If we wanted you could get a lucid air that's was next on like it's like all right
It's like all right. What's the least rate on a?
Audi e-tron or whatever
Because at least that I saying that we're e-tron drivers feels like that
I have enough funness for the lm the old
Audi lmp1 cars that saying e-tron feels
Kind of cool, but yeah, and then it's like oh, okay, so you don't want to give elan busk. All right
Do you have bmw i4 not your speed? Yeah, what's a lucid air release look like? You know not that bad, but then it's just like ah
Handing money directly to the Saudis cool
Also feels great. I will say
I will say those cars are of course they are they're a 100000 dollars. They should be really nice Victoria
That's fairly also still have like a ton of bugs with we're like the keys don't work a lot of the time
Yeah, I bet
But but he's don't work really
Yeah, well because it's the cheapest shittiest fob. I've ever used with a car in my life
It's like this is a little tykes toy
Not a 100000 dollar like the little tykes tozy cozy
The most reasonable evie on the market now
You can get them for as low as 70 000 to dollars
Like we're come on. That's a that's an affordable sedan. We're doing we're doing good. We're not doing 70 000
Daily and also trying to get a fun car on the side
Also, you know what was going to be the fun car a fucking gr 86
You know what takes really weird toyota? It's fucking smooth soft weight oil the fucking gr 86 like
And there's one of those like man, we finally got some money for like some fun cars. This would be nice
We could write we could like, you know use them to promote that. No, absolutely not get fucked gay girls said the auto market
Like god damn it
Uh, and then just yeah, I
It
You get a bmw i7 if you end to spend a hundred and 40000 dollars to have an imx screen in the back
I'd rather like fuck it. Let's just
We'll we'll catty
We'll catty lease me the celestique or whatever like
I saw one somebody at pittsburgh bought one really. Yeah, I was fucking dumbfounded. I was just like holy shit
That is such a pittsburgh wealthy car that feels like a car
targeted vehicle
like
Like
I think it might your money your money is measured in centuries if you drive a celestique. I think it might
I saw it out and about when cmu was doing their commencement stuff
I think it might be I might be the chancellor of cmu's car
I think oh, yeah, you know, yeah, that's where ancient. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Um
Anyways, vicky, that's my rant about how fucked the the eevee market is to be fair
I I people have probably noticed I haven't talked more about getting that car
And I need to talk to my friends about it who had offered to enable me which is really sweet of them
the thing is is like
gas is
650 a gallon here and I just I like every month the podcast is done slightly better and we got the shirts and like
I've got this book coming up on the horizon and it's like I'm making a little bit more money
And it's like I think
You know, there's like I I feel a little bit less bad about my own personal future in some way
But inflation is raising at such a rate that I'm like I cannot
adequately budget anything
And so I'm like do I really want to put an unknown amount of car insurance on a car and like maintain the expense of having it when
all of these like
Problems are hitting at once. Uh, the answer has been no. I'm too scared. Yeah. Um
It's just it's just it's it like I I
Everything is like, you know
The inflation rate is as high now as it was in the 70s. So like
Uh, that sucks. I still don't make anywhere near as much money as I did
You know
Five years ago or whatever
Uh, even when I was also just a freelancer like is it because the freelance market is destroyed because we've decided that AI should do everything forever
um, and then yeah, I mean like
What are the some of the scenarios that are kind of like I see specialists talking about these places that I don't see people talk about in mainstream media
but like there's a chance that oil just hits $200 a barrel and we don't have like a because like
We we have destroyed what I saw recently. I think it's an IE
EA like international energy
agency
Like study we've destroyed like I think somewhere between seven and nine percent of global oil supply and that it is no longer accessible
Um, but we've only seen a demand destruction of like three or four percent
Uh, which that's a huge gulf at a certain point. We are just not like
We're pulling from reserves that is going to end the oil is going to stay locked behind the straight
there's not going to be a way to get it and like
We are going to have like it's just going to become like
We're going to hit the the sharp part of the supply and demand
Like not to be an economist about it
But it's very difficult to predict anything and the market sucks. Uh, I was told this is the most efficient system for allocating resources
And I'm thinking people I think we might have been misled. Uh, yeah, uh, also just I
You've reminded me through all this that like
Uh, it's just
When we are dealing
With so much and you know what like gas itself has gone down in Pittsburgh
I don't know why but gas went down like 10 10 cents in Pittsburgh
But it's still just like that's not
Reassuring enough to say well now it's we're getting good because that's the
This eternal back and forth that the u.s. Government is having with itself whether or not it wants to you know, the uh
One of my favorite stock images of all time, which is just the guy in the business suit looking at stocks all going down with a gun to his head
That's what every that's what every adult in
In in government feels like to me right now
and like, you know
I see we've made it. I've see I've see we're making e15 our forever gas now because
The corn lobbyists need it and also
We could pad out that supply with corn
You like corn
It's but the thing is this like it doesn't really actually help anybody because I mean for one it wears engines and components quicker
But also even aside from that you just get less mileage
Yeah, it like like
If like ethanol based fuels end up being
at like a wash to net worse
For consumption because it makes cars less efficient. You get less miles per gallon
That's not but that's not important because it make it make corn producers happy
And hold a blood feast only gets elected because of the corn lobby
The corn producers are like, there's no
I don't even want to get into
Like I I have been thankful for the fact that I could just talk about base oils and not about nitrogen based fertilizers
Yeah, uh-huh
you know like
my my it was my wonderful lovely wife and tigany's birthday this week, um and
Her mom got her a like vegetable planter
Partially because we were like, you know partially because my wife has a green thumb and wanted to like grow some stuff
And like she loves taking care of plants
But also partially because we're like we should probably just have like our own little victory garden going not because like
It we are not commune brained enough to be like, oh, let's just farm all our own food or whatever because
That's one not possible and two even if it were
subsistence farming
There's a reason we stopped
Like that shit is hard. It's miserable
Uh, you can die really easily all the time. Uh, anyway
But but just because we're like it probably wouldn't be a terrible idea to have like all of the like expensive herbs and like
Some of the like more fragile crops require more tending to just have like a little extra supplemented
Just just in case food prices go
Berserk, which like I don't need to tell you what would happen if like diesel fuel suddenly became like, you know
eight dollars a gallon or whatever that'd be bad for
Everything
Because um, you couldn't just transition to using the you know, electrified rail network in america again, uh
do you think
If I was the if irate I hate knowing if I was the irate negotiators
I would just be sitting across at the table from my american counterparts being like
Do you know what they're gonna do to you if gas hits 10?
Do you know what they're going to do to you specifically because like your name's in the paper you're a negotiator like you know
What they're gonna do to you
Specifically and it's just like I yeah, and then you have to go back to president deals
It's like hey, man. We just gotta fucking take this and I was just like
But I'm thinking I'm thinking about my ballroom right now, so we're gonna just not worry about this
I mean I'm shifting it to ballroom mode
And uh, that's why that's why you can't buy a car
And that's why you can't buy a car. That's why you can't uh buy
He's why you can't afford an airplane trip. That's why you can't put gas in your car. It's why you can't ride a bus
Everyone should go watch cabaret
For no reason
Oh my god speaking of things we should
Ha ha ha ha ha
I put this in here as a beautiful little a little a beautiful little digestive of a story
Uh, uh because yeah, I mean the Ioniq stuff is not like look
We have a car that works. It's not like a great need but like I
Carvada or whoever we sell this uh central to stop listening
Uh, it did one very scary electronics thing
In front of me and I'm like cars haunted nissans haunted hit 45,000 miles nissans haunted gotta get the fuck out of this thing
Uh, the cvt has gotten noticeably a little slower and I go. Yeah, we gotta get the fuck out of here
Because like one I don't think nissan's gonna be like a real company here in a year and a half, but like
um
Victoria we're we're fans question mark of the fast and furious franchise here
Oh
My god, that's such a compliment. Yeah, right like it's that's I I said it that I actually had to like sit with it and go like
if I like
123
I think how many movies there's 10 out uh not counting Hobbes and uh ampersand Shaw
Uh
I haven't actually I don't know if you can call me a fan of something. I haven't seen all of
Because I've only seen I think seven of them. I bet they're the seven to watch though
I mean it was 89 or ten any good. I thought
Did I like nine or did I like eight?
I liked the one where they went to space. I think the last
I think the last one I saw was whatever the one is where they're like
Having a gun battle on the world's longest runway as that c-130 refuses to I think that's seven
Yeah, that's seven or eight. Yeah, I was like this is this is kind of stupid because like
This runway is literally 30 to 40 miles because that's where they kill. Uh, that's where they kill, uh
Gizlain max not her name
Not her name
Not her name. What's the Zionist woman? Who's wonder woman? Not gizlain max. Well, why was I thinking?
I just was like what's that awful woman in the media?
I
Doing a getting getting Jordan Jordan failing the name name more than one awful woman challenge. Yeah
Jordan respects women so much. She only thinks there's one bad one. The rest of us are perfect beautiful. I don't remember
It's the one where uh, it's the one where uh, kisung kang and has been has been hooked it up with her
I I her character's name is gazelle. I think I think that's why my braid was like
Gizlain
um
I had only seen I I'm again
I had only seen the first three before my girlfriend at the time took me to see the one where they went to space and also
Vin diesel uses
Uses a rope to swing across a chasm
but
You go oh the man Vin diesel and i'm like no the dodge charger. He was driving somehow grasps
Of rope and uses it to swing across the chasm and anyways
movies are fun
But uh despite uh
despite everything, uh, we will never be free of the fast and furious franchise, uh because
Uh, are you familiar with what up fronts are in like a media?
uh connotation in up front is like
usually, uh, it's right as like the the the winter spring like
Film and tv schedule is wrapping up
They usually do like the summer where show new shows aren't on and they're preparing for like fresh false late
So your up front is like a preview of what the rest of the year holds
Uh, it is mostly like a shareholder presentation, but it is big for like, you know
If you're an executive producer or like you're pitching a pilot or whatever
This is where your pilot's probably gonna get announced or whatever
anyways, Vin diesel said that nbc universal is gonna bake fucking four fast and furious tv shows
Because streaming means that everything gets to be a tv show forever despite, you know
whoever, uh
Whoever be like, I don't know how many ncis's there are there. We at least need that many fast and furious shows. Um
To be fair, oh my god, what did uh when asked to board directly about it
some folks at edbc universal who uh were not named in this uh deadline article were uh
Said that well vindiesel said the number four out loud when he was next to jimmy fallon the most fascist friendly man
of late night, uh
An nbc person said well only one is like for sure for sure a development. Um
One and four are different numbers, but you know, this is what I've always appreciated about vindiesel
Uh, is that vins a dreamer and a doer?
Uh, and often types could just kind of brute force projects into reality
Like, you know, why is he not in too fast too furious because he uh
Fast and furious made so much money that he they're like, please please please come back
And we didn't think we'd need you for more than one movie and he's like actually you fuck you
I'm gonna go do triple x
Uh, or I'm gonna go do another riddick movie where I'm gonna teach judy dench how to play dungeons and dragons
Uh, the the learning the lore behind how the riddick movies came to be was great
It's just it's just that he's really into dnd. He's Yeah, he's like
These characters I made up are great. We should do a movie about them. He's done that twice
There's like also like a fantasy movie that he did that is literally just based on one of his campaigns
And it's just like I'm gonna be honest
I'd give a lot of money to be at a vindiesel table. I think have not roleplayed in a while, but like
I think it would be fun. Um
Uh, the thing about vindiesel that I will say is that like he he does seem
Genuinely like he like I obviously, you know, they're they've made some questionable casting decisions in the fast and furious universe in the past
Pedophile
Yeah, but vindiesel didn't cast that pedophile. Vindiesel just has continued to try to get back to that pedophile in a second
Vindiesel actually does seem like a pretty chill dude. He seems I would have a beer with vindiesel. He uh
Vindiesel come on the podcast. Yeah, I'm sure we could find this
I'm sure he's not offended by us calling his dead friend a pedophile over and over again. Um
Uh, we really need an alternative like we need a production company name so that because I almost
I did almost email someone for comment about something the other day
And then I realized
Sending an email from tradgrilesbo at gmail.com asking for media
In a media inquiry. I don't we haven't done it yet. So I don't know how it's going to play when we eventually have to do it
Uh
But also if my press credentials for uh, uh, thanks and trad grilesbo, I think that would be pretty fucking sick also
so, uh
Oh god, um
But yeah, uh, we've been kind of in a fallow period for the fast and furious franchise
Uh, it's kind of been sitting idle
Get it
Get it
Get it idle
Victoria
Yeah, yeah, okay, I'll take that. I'll I'll take closing it on your location. Oh, that's fine. That's fine finally
um
The last movie came out in 2023 and it just kind of fizzled
Like it still did. I I don't think it lost a ton of money, but like
After the meteoric like miracle run that the franchise had been on since it did its soft reboot with like
The fourth one
Which the fourth one's ampersand the first one is and the the fourth one's fast ampersand furious
So I fucked that up when we did the name for the the commentary episode
um
But like it looks like we were we got there
It looks like the 11th movie is finally happening
Uh, which is supposed to wrap up the uh, the the main story of the the fast saga
I'm throwing air quotes about around a lot of things that vid diesel likes to say about his franchise that he has
Lazarus twice back into life now. Um
But yeah, I uh
They're fun movies there. It's just such an odd cultural artifact that
I do wonder if it is purely like
If this next one's gonna do it at all and if these tv shows happen because like
There's no real reason why the last one shouldn't have worked just like the other ones
Other than they introduced jason baboa and jason baboa kind of like
kills franchises
Yeah, I mean like
Are you are you aware that the first aquaman movie made more than a billion dollars?
And yet when they tried to do a second aquaman movie
It made so little money that it was part of the reason that they wrapped up the stitor uh, dc universe
And gave everything to james gun
No, yeah
I didn't know this. I I I the last the last time I was really in I'm like
Actually, this is kind of funny. The last superhero movie I saw in a theater. I was bored of shit
And I saw captain marvel
Yeah
In in a theater like oh god, I don't even know how long uh not to be uh, this flavor of uh white woman
but the yeah, I uh
I I was there seated for the first marvel movies
I was so excited
For all of them because I couldn't believe that they were making it work
And then the avengers movie happened the first one like back in 2012 or whatever
And I'm like, oh my god, they really did it
They did all these origin movies and then they they got together and they they made it happen
Uh, I hope I'll never read anything about joss weed and ever again
Uh
And I was I was done. I was done with marvel movies
14 years ago and yet they have continued and then like you know, the last the last superhero movie
I watched was the most recent superman and that was it was really good
I I am here for a radically hopeful
Yeah, oh shit. Yeah, it's good. It was good. Uh, I love I love uh superman kills
Netanyahu the movie
Yeah, yeah, that was the
I did see that one. I forgot about I saw an i max
Um, which was a really good movie. Yeah shout out the pacific science and I guess here in a year or two
You'll be able to see it fast 11 uh on i max because it looks like it's finally happening in 2028
Uh, which is crazy because they were supposed to film 10 and 11 back to back and 10 was supposed to be part one
and 11 was supposed to be part two, but I think they're just
They're apparently going back to their street racing routes
It I don't know but uh, the real kicker is I found a uh, it's a screed rant article. So we'll see how real it is, but um
They're looking to break paul walker back for the last one because well, we know paul walker's dead
in the in universe
paul walker's still alive. He just retired
That's not
The you know
The one thing I will give the
Franchises that it did actually like, you know, they did the whole like drive away seat where he's got the white super
And he kind of peels off from the group and it's like this tearful thing and it is like
My complaints with paul walker, you know as a person aside
It was a very nice memorial to the dead man that was a very influential part of the franchise and doing this is just
Disgusting, I think I think disgusting. It's not great. I mean we've been in the era of uh,
cg homoculi
CGI necromancy of of dead actors for a couple years now, but like
I think it doesn't ever get that
wet
I didn't cry
But I felt genuine emotions watch when I watched all of the movies finally when I had the corona virus
They're great. Are you sick for a week?
movie series
Or if you're by very confusing this is victoria. Have I told you this one?
My driving instructor
Like when we were doing the like classroom component of driving instruction when we were filling out the workbook
He would just put on the fast and furious movies on the little like tv card
And he obviously was like he's like, yeah, don't do any of this, but like
Is it doesn't it fit? I kind of wanted to watch and I'm just like, yeah, you're a
You're a coach teaching a class. All right. Uh-huh. Uh-huh
But like when I finally watched all of that parking's like
It's sweet and also he basically drives to heaven
Because the I
Even though he is not dead in the story
It is the most this guy died and we're saying goodbye to him
Like they basically do that and they're like to see you in valhalla. I've got the watch or whatever
Like that. It's just I
Now no, uh, we're gonna get he goes to car heaven his brother
Again to be his body double and then we're gonna cg face replacement
node pedophile paul walker
Porsche barbecue enthusiast paul walker
Back to life for
For a movie and maybe maybe we'll give him an entire zombie
tv show
They're getting a roller coaster though. That's pretty cool
That's the weird thing about NBC universal is like they own
They just own like theme parks. Oh, yeah, they've got a theme park. I guess three
I wonder if they're gonna put the fast and furious roller coaster next to the wizarding world of harry potter
Yeah, uh, to be fair. I I trust at least one of those franchise routers to not be a turf
It's vindiesel
I don't know. I don't know if I want to know vindiesels. He's a node by
He's a node by sexual at the very least. Yeah. Oh, is he?
Good for him. I I would still like to I would I think I want to have him on the yeah
I mean we should I he seems the thing is
I know that he was friends with paul walker, but paul walker was you know
38 and dating what a seven year old. Yeah, we call that the jerry seinfeld
We call that the technically it's a
Ibafilia or whatever
The libertarian
Um, yeah, uh
Yeah
That's I I guess
I don't have a bigger point other than just like we've those movies are in our wheelhouse
And uh, I was once again confronted by the horrors of no franchise can ever end
As long as there is still money to be uh bled out of a stone
In the in the 11th episode vindiesel goes to iran and has to forcibly open the straight-of-four moves by driving the minesweeper boat
All right victoria like I we have a lot of fun here. We should tm tm tm
That's a trangrillismo official idea like uh, mr. Diesel if you would like to buy that script from us
It has to end with vindiesel being being like converted to uh
To realize that america is the great satan and actually we should we should be forced to suffer for our actions
I think he was already fake evil for a movie though if I robber correctly. So I think uh
I am not familiar with the the vindiesel cinematic video
Uh, I will say I I was gonna like obviously this episode has been a ridiculous downer
I did see a good movie this week. It's not car related, but it's trans related
Is that still close enough to make it up? Yeah
Because I also watched a good movie for another podcast, uh, but I watched heart target
So like that's not about being trans or anything. That's just a john woo film
I haven't seen that you should watch it. It's on to be right now
So I watched it with ads on to be
Pooh, he's got it to be's got that uh to be's got driven
Oh real piece of shit on to be
Um, no, I saw I went to the the Seattle international film festival this week
um, which we do every year around now and I saw the world premiere of uh
Mia moors again again, which was uh executive produced by uh, lana, which house or um, lily, which houseki
I think I think it's lily, which houseki. Uh, it was
written to like directed to acted
You know main actress was by mia moor who was a trans lady
uh, it was like
I think 90 percent of the speaking roles in it were trans people
Um, the theater I went to see it in which was the sif uptown in queen han in seattle was
80 percent trans people by volume
Uh, it was filmed in Aberdeen
So it's just like, you know for for as much of a bad mood as I've been in this week about literally everything
It was very fun to go to uh, like
A trans cultural moment that was basically like created in my city premiering
That's that was kind of fun. It was a good movie too. They made it with a 100000 dollars
and it
looked fantastic, which to me was the most impressive part because like
Making art on a shoestring budget is my kink
um, I I
I have to romanticize that or otherwise I'd go insane, but like
Uh, really genuinely a fantastic job. So I saw that this week. That is really lovely and um
Yeah, I I'm glad you got to be
I'm glad you got to have that because that moment feels very
Needed
Right now. Yeah. Yeah, it was it was well
And like I did it was fun because like I did a couple of pictures of uh,
Mia like on the red carpet at the premiere
Um for the pollination book and it was like, you know, despite the fact that things are terrible. There's still like, you know
plenty of
Joyous moments of community to be found which is like all that keeps me going
I mean that was the whole point of like what I my interview was with the Gwen this week for that story about leaving texas
It was like half of why I like Seattle is just because like, you know, there's actual people
It's like, you know, I go to Cal Anderson on Friday night and it's like full of trans people who are like
Having a good time, you know, having dinner together or like playing frisbee. It's just like it feels
It's just it's nice to be able to have that as a grounding after like how bad everything is so
Yeah, I uh, I have been putting that energy towards uh, the photo gallery
Uh submissions will be closed by the time this episode comes out
uh, but yeah, I
uh
Putting that together and we've got some great submissions already and I just I'm very
Very happy that we even if
Oh, yeah, can I can I submit to that as a as a non? Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, uh, but has good paper
Absolutely. Yeah phobia uh phobia of uh, uh
The bundlilith show
Phobia is submitting. I I'm letting some former yensers or just people I know who have visited Pittsburgh submit
You were I I guess I had assumed you were submitting not that you have to but like, yeah, I
I wasn't sure I didn't know if it counted because I never lived in I mean, I lived in your like about enemy
I was in the suburb of cleveland for like, yeah, but that's like you you you've seen the majesty of of pit burt
So you will be at oh, yeah
Cleveland and pittsburgh having a rivalry and somebody who grew up in cleveland and really likes pittsburgh is kind of like that madmen meme
Where it's like, I feel so bad for you. I don't think about you at all. Yeah
It's uh
genuinely like
I much love to the people of cleveland, but cleveland is not at all as like well recovered from the uh systemic
Collapse of all american industry as pittsburgh, and I don't even think pittsburgh recovered good
Like I don't even think pittsburgh recovered good
I just think enough of the robber barons parked all of their cash here when they died
That it kind of gave us a get out of uh, you know
We were once the wealthiest city in the western hemisphere
And then we went bankrupt less than a hundred years later, and I think you could feel that in the everything about pittsburgh
Yeah, no, it's great. Uh, well then cool. I will be sending my solutions. Um
victoria
Do you want to read out our uh, do you want to read out our 15 dollar a month? Uh shout out to your folks? Oh, yeah
I just wanted
Yeah, absolutely. I will do that as soon as I pull it up
You would think I'd have it up at this point in the episode every week, but it still always catches me off guard
Despite the fact we've been doing this before I mean I get caught off. Uh, oh, I want to throw out one thing right now
Um, I am currently wearing a trend. Oh shit. Yeah, uh-huh
That I picked up yesterday from uh shout out ink knife press here in seattle
M didn't incredible job on these. They look really good. Yeah
Um
They're the women's fit is the literal most flattering t-shirt. I own instantly like I
I have tried to find t-shirts that make my tits look this good before and I've never succeeded
Uh, I can't speak to the unisex ones, but they they're at least comfy. I can tell you that much. Um
So, uh, I will be packing those
Hopefully all of the months uh as we were recording on friday. I'm hopefully doing that by sunday
And I'm hoping by the time you hear this episode they will be
Um either mailed to you or soon to be mailed to you depending on like how many I can get through because there are quite a few to
Pack up
people who ordered prints from me that will be probably a little bit longer because uh shipping flat shipping a
13 by 19 print is it takes a while to box up that is a
And I have to ship them separately so you probably get shirts first then prints
but um, anyway, I just wanted to say that because uh
Did be it seriously I
Antigone put on one of these shirts and like she actually had like her boobs done
Um, and it's ridiculous. It's like a cartoon
It
So good. Anyway, uh, I was going to read out the names now. Yeah, let's do it ready
All right, cool, um
Is a thank you for all of her $15 and up subscribers for helping support us
helping me pay my rent and uh for listening to the show
So, uh, thank you to the people's pillow princess
Very good. It's extremely good
Thank you to Mimi
bean
brie henry
sable
James skill breath
charlie stangle
Where are you mary barra? I just want to talk about sparky v replacement batteries. We're gonna keep asking her. We're gonna keep doing it
I'm gonna I'm gonna be reading this podcast outside her front door
Thank you to theodore constantine john v
buick
adam shepherd
steven duckworth
phalan
mildly perturbed
asher in
chris hefner
Jerry at homogameragenda.com
dexas
Tara hailstorm
will
princess rees got drunk and fought in a bitch suit
You know, I mean who among us really me me me. I I have not done that. I certainly can't throw stones here
Well, I certainly can't throw stones here
Emma alex
My entire life is pennants for having once fist bumped clarence thomas that one should stay an inside thought you pay
You paid us money to put that out there
Like you paid us $15 to I mean at least it's pennants, right?
Yeah, um
Yeah, I'm gonna try to make you not have to edit the episode really heavily. So I won't say anything else
Thank you to the fan, you'll help it. Thank you to saturday's claire
Uh wingsmith molybdenum disulfide connoisseur. I need to actually google what that is one of these weeks. I don't know what that is
um
Thank you to penile sparing vaginal plastic
Uh, I'm not a man. woman. I'm a show pig
I'm not sure. I don't know what a show pig is but
Thank you
Thank you to sylvia finn springs slug gorp grumb fellow classic emoticon face
Thank you to julie aguilar gavin g whiz
crystal storm john russell josh j and selectrick
Thank you all so much and thank you for listening. Uh, if you're a regular listener, and I hope you are all doing okay
I know that this episode was not as much fun as perhaps I normally would like to make it
But at some point you have to admit that the world yeah, um, just just fucking take care of each other like don't
Everyone's tense and it's been uh
It's been one hell of a meltdown may so far, but like uh, oh my god, even I've
Everyone has it's tis the season, but um, you know
Just take care of each other take care of the people around you who help make your community what it is and if you don't have
Yeah, if you don't have someone who's uh told you that they are proud of you for being yourself lately
Let let us do that and uh, we're glad you're here
You
About this episode
The episode opens with trans community safety and media dynamics, including how coverage and social pressure can feel depersonalizing and even lead to legal action. It then pivots into a “banks are out of oil” style oil-supply discussion: buying engine oil now, what base oil is, and why Group III shortages could keep low-viscosity grades under pressure through 2027. The hosts connect supply-chain fragility to pandemic-era shocks, shipping disruptions, and pricing/availability. Later, they swap to EV and sedan shopping, recalls, and ride/comfort gripes.
Original notes
Hello and a heads up for the start of this episode: We discuss the recent murder of Seattle resident, UW student, and trans woman Juniper Blessing. We recorded this episode the day after her name was announced, and we were both extremely distraught. We discuss the ridiculous cruelty of her death and the general sadness of living as a trans person in the modern American world. If you find this triggering and upsetting and would like to skip it (which trust me, I get it if you do), the mainline episode begins at 7:58.
Today, in the actual episode, Jordan and Vicki go to the bank and take all their oil out, because the banks are out of Group III Base Oils!!! (Victoria does indeed go John Oliver mode again about base oils btw, hope y'all enjoy that.) Then, Jordan describes a perfect car which is totally illegal to buy (thanks to one weird trick Hyundai DOESN'T want you to KNOW). Then we discuss the fact that we all live in the Fast and Furious Cinematic Universe, forever, as NBC is making like four shows. Maybe. Who knows anymore tbh.
As always, our theme song is off Stella Spazzatura's Horse Tranquilizer Simulator.
Referenced Stories:
Gwen Howerton's Story About Texas -> Seattle Refugees @Chron
ILMA/DOE Talks On Base Oil Supply Chain @ILMA
Texas City Disaster (Vol. II) @Well There's Your Problem YouTube
Group III Pricing Chaos @JobbersWorld
ILMA Expectations Of Supply Pressure Through 2027 @CNBC
Bimmerpost Poster With The Lathe Of Heaven @Bimmerpost
Ioniq 6 Canned For America @CarAndDriver
Ioniq 6 Stop-Sale Recall @People
Fast And Furious Forever And Ever And Ever @Hollywood Reporter
The Receipts For Paul Walker Dating Teenage Girls When He Was Well Into His Thirties @Jalopnik
The Receipts For Jerry Seinfeld Dating A Teenage Girl When He Was Almost Forty @Collider
Tran Girlismo
Victoria Scott & Jordan Hoffstetter
0:00
89:46