LIVE
The John Clay Wolf Show has appeared on Terrestrial Radio for a really, really, really long time.
So we dug into our pockets.
And on the other side of our d***, we found something funny.
And yes, it's contagious.
Gather round as the Wolf Pack goes on this throwback adventure.
Ho, ho, ho!
What it do?
It's ya boy, DJ Pre-K with the John Clay Wolf Show.
And I've got a sack full of green buds and throwback clips, baby.
Let's take a trip down Christmas memory lane with everybody's favorite sketchy chipmunk,
our own Randy.
Him and his boys have been scheming to hit a big lick this holiday season, and it looks
like the prize just might be in sight.
Him and his chipmunk posse are finally gonna be made in the shade.
They deserve it after a trifle in Thanksgiving.
Let's check it out and see if Randy can come up big.
Ho, ho, ho!
Randy Rusty, what's his name?
Randy and his chipmunk.
Hey guys!
What's going on?
Hey guys!
Good morning.
Good morning.
What's up?
I'm sweating a little bit.
You do.
You look high and all.
Yeah, it's a holiday season.
You look disheveled.
I'm tired.
Oh, you're tired.
What have you been doing?
I've been trying to get everything together for Christmas.
Just trying to keep it all together.
Yeah.
Still have nuts for everybody till spring.
Oh, is that okay?
You gotta kind of measure them out of this winter.
Well, to tell you the truth, I think it's got more to do with the great nut disparity.
For what?
You know, like chipmunks have been saving nuts all year long.
Well, yeah, you have to.
But squirrels, a lot of them just won't do it.
Well, no.
Depending on where you live.
Well, they've been running from dogs.
It's also the first time in a year you get a lot of nonviolent chipmunk crime.
What?
Namely, nut burglary.
There's nut.
Hey, hey, hey, it takes a lot of nuts to feed an extended family of 30 or 40 chipmunks.
We have a little rite of passage for all the young chipmunks and us dads.
There's an actual ceremony?
Yeah.
What has it worked?
We'll get several families together, too, because it takes like 20 of us to get it done.
We pull off giant heists.
A heist?
At the All Night Walmart Superstore?
No.
Where they got that big old nut bin?
Yeah.
Yeah, buddy.
I'm talking about walnuts, peanuts, cashew nuts, almonds and hazelnuts, Brazil nuts, pecans.
And sometimes maybe a carton of Winston's.
No, don't steal cigarettes.
Here's how it goes.
We all get inside while the stockers are going on break at 3 a.m.
And while the night helps all outside smoking, the little chipmunks all go to the back
and break into the egg counters in the refrigerator aisle
and run them up to the front in tandem and throw them on the floor in the main action alley,
leaving a trail of runny yellow egg destruction all the way to the back of the store.
You guys have this figured out.
It's a mess.
So while they're doing the egg work,
us more experienced professionals of stuff as many as produce bags as full as we can to drag
and make for the shopping cart door.
So we always make the haul.
One time my cousin Rudy slipped on the egg and fell down on his way out.
Scattered his nuts all over the floor and twisted his hind leg.
But you know what?
He sued him.
He sued what?
Yeah, he won.
No, he didn't.
Like 60,000 nuts.
Oh, God.
He went to court really.
Now that Thanksgiving's behind us.
Yeah.
Time to get Christmas on.
Y'all have a good Thanksgiving?
It was great.
It was a great Thanksgiving.
Yeah.
What does chipmunks do for Thanksgiving?
Well, it's just probably the same as you do.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Like turkey, dressing, and cranberries?
Oh, God, no.
Oh.
No, we wouldn't know where to start.
You ever been around a turkey?
Yeah.
They're just crazy.
I know.
Let me just...
They try to talk to a turkey sometimes.
I know.
I know.
Turkeys are like the pinnacle of the animal world.
Safety.
Everything they say is like,
Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
Besides that, every chipmunk knows.
Yeah.
In an omnivorous environment.
Omnivorous.
A turkey will eat your ass.
That's a question.
Yeah.
No me.
No.
Gracias.
Gracias.
No mana.
I got you.
I never knew.
Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
I know that.
That's how they say it.
Thank you, Rusty.
Okay.
Bye.
See you, man.
Randy.
Randy.
Randy.
All right.
Y'all know what to do.
You can check out old episodes on there.
You know, stay up to date with what we got going on.
Get cool gear.
We got hats, shirts, all that.
Hit us up on Facebook, you know.
Search John Clay Wolf Show.
We're on Instagram.
John's on Twitter.
You know, you can holler at all of us, okay?
You know how to spell it, okay?
We appreciate y'all listening.
Keep on rocking with us.
0:00
4:59