Slipping the clutch means not fully pressing or releasing the clutch pedal, which lets the car's engine and wheels move a bit independently. This helps when starting the car or controlling speed.
The Porsche Boxster is a sporty car with the engine placed in the middle, which helps it drive really well. The version mentioned has an automatic gearbox that came before Porsche made a faster-shifting one. People talk about it because it's a fun and somewhat affordable way to own a Porsche.
The Porsche 911 is a famous fast car that has its engine in the back. People love it because it drives really well and looks great. It's one of the most well-known sports cars in the world.
The Volkswagen Beetle is a small, round car that lots of people like because it looks unique and is easy to drive. It was made a long time ago and still has fans today.
Handbrake turning is when a driver pulls the handbrake to make the back wheels stop spinning, which helps the car turn quickly by sliding the back end around. It's a trick used to make sharp turns or slides.
The BMW M3 is a fast and sporty car made by BMW. The convertible version lets you drive with the roof down, which many people enjoy. It's known for being fun to drive and good for both daily use and racing.
The sill is the bottom edge of the car's body near the door. A sill crimp means this part got bent or damaged, which is bad because it's hard to fix and can make the car look worse.
The Buick Regal is a medium-sized car that is comfortable to drive. Sometimes, people buy used ones that were used by the government, which might mean they were driven a lot but also taken care of. It's talked about because it can be a good, affordable car.
The MG MGB is a small British sports car that was popular in the 1960s and 70s. The 'Rubber Bumper' version has big black rubber bumpers that protect the car in minor crashes.
The Dodge Charger is a big, strong car from America that has a very powerful engine. The Shelby version is a special, faster model that some people might think is secret or unofficial, but it really exists. People talk about it because it's a classic muscle car.
The Chrysler Voyager is a big car that can carry lots of people and stuff, like a family car. It's comfortable and good for trips with many passengers. People talk about it because it's useful for families.
The Chrysler Town and Country is a type of van that many families used because it had lots of space for people and stuff. It was one of the first popular family vans.
The Dodge Caravan is a family van that many people used because it was big inside and good for carrying lots of people or things. It helped make minivans popular.
The Plymouth Voyager is a type of van that families used to buy for carrying lots of people or stuff. It was made by a company called Plymouth and was popular a while ago.
High octane fuel is special gas that helps some cars run better and faster without making knocking noises. It's like giving the engine better fuel to perform well.
A separate calibrated speedo is a speedometer that is placed somewhere else in the car, like in front of the passenger, and it shows the car's speed correctly.
The Rover SD1 is an older British car that was popular in the 1970s and 80s. It has a unique shape with a sloping back and was seen as a cool car back then.
British Leyland was a big British company that made lots of cars a long time ago. They made many famous British cars but had some problems that made their cars less reliable.
Austin Rover was a British company that made cars many years ago. It was part of a bigger company called British Leyland and made some well-known cars.
The Fiat Ritmo is a small car from many years ago that some people didn't like at first because of how it looked or worked. But now, some people think it's interesting and fun to remember. It's talked about because it's a bit unusual.
The Mazda MX-5 is a small, fun car with two seats that people like to drive because it's easy and sporty. It's very popular and known for being a good car to enjoy driving.
The Ford F-150 is a big truck that many people use for work and daily driving. It's good at driving in snow because it has strong power and can handle tough roads.
The Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution is a fast and sporty car that can drive well on all kinds of roads, even rough ones. The Evo 10 is one of the last and best versions. People like it because it's fun to drive and can be made even faster.
Tyres are the round rubber parts on a car's wheels that touch the road. The right tyres help the car drive safely and smoothly, especially when it's snowy or wet.
Four-wheel drive means the car sends power to all four wheels at the same time, which helps it grip the road better, especially in slippery conditions like snow.
The Toyota Land Cruiser is a very strong and reliable big car that can go almost anywhere, even on rough roads. People talk about it when deciding if they really need such a tough car to get around. It's famous for lasting a long time and working well in hard conditions.
The Range Rover is a fancy and comfortable big car that can drive off-road very well. People sometimes wonder if you really need such a car to go to hard places or if it's just for looking good. It's known for being both tough and nice inside.
The Suzuki Jimny is a small, tough car that can drive on rough roads even though it's not very big. People like it because it's easy to use and doesn't cost a lot but still works well off-road. It's often compared to bigger, more expensive cars that do similar things.
LIVE
I'm Richard Porter. I'm Johnny Smith. And this is on the other side of things, the Smith and Sniff spinoff, in which we answer your questions.
Hi there. Greetings. Welcome to another question answering session for a Friday. Happy Friday. If you're listening to it on Friday, if you're not, happy day.
Other days are available. Happy other day. I'm going to just go straight out. I'm already slipping the clutch. I'm just going to dump it now.
This is a story, not a story, a letter from Alistair Underwood. He hasn't said I can't say his name.
Good morning. You pair of lovely podcast presenters slash flat headed sleeve valves. Often you mention older drivers getting into automatic cars only to experience unintended acceleration episodes.
I now have firsthand experience of this. I have a torque converter auto Mazda CX-5. The other day, whilst having my foot on the brake at the lights to arrest the torque converter creep,
my car suddenly accelerated forwards a few feet. The distance was definitely longer than expected as it took my brain a second to work out what on earth was going on.
I was wearing quite wide shoes that I don't usually wear and I assumed the right shoe slipped off the brake a bit because it had been wet.
And onto the accelerator, I mention it because a few years ago, my little brother, who only works part time, I don't know why that's relevant, was roped in by a friend to sell his Porsche 981 Tiptronic pre-PDK Boxster.
As his friend had moved to the UK, he's never owned an automatic before, my little brother, so my basically unemployed little brother managed to crash my friend's Porsche through a shop window making the local news.
I, of course, until yesterday ruthlessly mocked him for this. My brother is a tennis coach and thus is often wearing quite sporting rubber and therefore probably did what I just did.
My question after all of this is, what's the most embarrassing thing you have done to someone else's car?
Sorry, I feel like there's two quite subtle digs at tennis coaches in that message.
Yes.
Suggesting they only work part time, slash basically unemployed.
It was cruel because I think a good tennis coach is a very good person, very talented, just putting that out there.
What's the most embarrassing thing you have done to someone else's car?
Okay, I can go on with this, I can proceed.
Please do.
A long time ago, when I was in the Beetle scene, the air called Volkswagen scene, my girlfriend's sister and her partner, husband, I think, decided to also buy a Beetle as like a weekend car and they were London people so they didn't need a Beetle, a car to use every day.
It was just a weekend thing.
We all met up over the weekend at her parents' house in Shrewsbury or Shrewsbury, depending on what you care about saying.
Now, he said to me, the chap and my girlfriend's sister said, oh, we think there's a problem with the Beetle.
You know about Beetles, you've driven lots of them.
Could you take it out for a drive and tell us whether it's doing this thing and I can't remember what it was?
I said, yeah, I'll do it tomorrow because I think we were drinking wine.
The next morning, I woke up, opened the curtains and it had been snowing and I went, oh, well, Beetles are amazing in snow.
So I said, I'll go out and I'll see if it does the thing you have been talking about and I'll report back.
And I went out in the snow and was slithering around and really enjoying it.
And then as I went, as I'd come round myself, shake down from round the block, I tried to tip it in and slide it onto my girlfriend's parents' drive.
And instead of oversteering, it just went into a humiliating understeer and it hit a low wall right in front of everybody, including the owners of the actual car.
That was really embarrassing.
I think that's probably the most embarrassing thing I've done to someone else's car.
I felt awful because it is not long at a repaint.
So it had done in the front valence on the edge of the bonnet.
It was a small impact because I was only going very slowly, but it was the humiliation of thought I was going to do some fantastic handbrake turning.
And it had done it all the way around the block.
I was slithering it nicely and then just in the bit in front of an audience, I just mugged it right up.
So I felt like a total fool, an absolute stroker.
You, Rich, what about you?
I can match that with just sheer embarrassment.
The one that came to mind was just when I borrowed a BMW M3 convertible for an Evo story.
I don't know why.
It was one of those slightly sort of thingy story about why convertibles often don't carry favour with Evo enthusiastic type people.
And so I had a M3 convertible and a Mini Cooper S convertible, I think, but I can't remember why and what the point was.
But we went up to a small airfield just north of London to do some photos.
And while manoeuvring the BMW in their car park, I didn't notice that one of the buildings had a low step.
It was like flagstones and it was sort of like two square flagstones deep from the building.
And arguably too big, I would say.
There's no need for the step to be that big and to project that far into the bit where cars drove around.
And I just managed to scrape the sill of the BMW onto the corner of the step,
which both dented the car and pulled the flagstone off the corner of the step a little bit.
And I looked and the doors that the step led to were heavily tinted glass and I couldn't see anything inside.
And the whole building looked a bit sort of not used.
So I thought, well, at least there's that.
And I was too busy fretting about the fact I kind of just damaged the sill of this brand new BMW.
A sill crimp is a very sad impact.
I don't like it.
Least favourite bits of damage to see on a car, never mind do on a car.
A sill crimp.
The sill crimp, exactly.
So I realised I couldn't really do anything about the BMW.
I pushed the flagstone back onto the step with my foot.
And then I just got back into the BMW because the photographer was waiting for me to bring it towards where he was set up to take pictures.
And then I had to break it to him that he was going to have to photograph it from the other side because the sill was all crimped.
But before I could do that, I was just getting into it.
And suddenly the door of this building flew open and this man came out quite angrily and said,
were you going to come in and admit to that?
And I was like, I didn't know you were in there.
I'm so sorry.
I just I didn't.
And he took my details.
Yes.
And then I never heard anything more about it, presumably because he realised that the flagstone was all right.
Not broken.
Or it made him realise that his step was idiotically big and he didn't.
He maybe he'd just chop it down anyway.
So I think he'd I think that was a trap that he'd set.
And you know, like a funnel web spider, it makes the trap and then it sits there for sometimes weeks waiting for prey.
It was a flagstone funnel.
An unused building just with a man.
He had a moustache, I seem to remember as well, which I think in some circumstances a moustache can make you seem angrier.
And he, yeah, he was really pissed off about his step, even though it looked like it was fine.
But he'd clearly seen what happened.
But from where?
Like it took him a while to come out.
And I think you could have only seen what happened if you were in the area behind the heavily tinted doors.
It was all very odd.
I think it's one of those businesses that's maybe gone defunct, but they have to pay a security guard to stop squatters.
So he lives in there.
And he has a moustache because he believes it gives him more authority.
Because there are some authoritative stashes, as we well know.
Yes.
That's, I think that's a, that's a given.
Army.
Sergeant Major.
Authoritash.
A great example.
Authoritash, exactly.
Yeah.
Just thought of that.
So I'll go to move on to a different question.
This one is from a listener called Andrea, who is in Italy.
And I know this because he starts with hello from Italy.
Okay.
You pair of flauto appele, which he explains at the bottom.
And I hope I'm pronouncing that very correctly.
Flato appele is skin flute.
And Andrea says, this is a definition my father used to describe the penis because it literally means skin flute.
I love that because I have used the term skin flute liberally over many years of my life.
And now I will just say flauto appele.
Yeah, I do.
I like that one.
That would make a good sticker on the back of an 80s Alfa Romeo or something.
It would, wouldn't it?
Yeah.
Anyway, so Andrea says on the latest episode you mentioned Jarvis Cocker's Libarren.
Yeah.
On that side of things during another episode you were discussing car related lyrics.
You should listen to short skirt long jacket by cake.
A great song by the way.
One of the lyrics is she's trading her MG for a white Chrysler Libarren.
And a few people mentioned this and it's not a song I'm familiar with.
I'm not familiar with it.
It sounds great.
It sounds like a wet leg song, short skirt long jacket.
Yeah, it does.
I only really know cake for the race was their big hit, wasn't it?
Of course.
They probably have a catalogue, just not familiar with it.
Anyway, I'll go and listen to that.
But what MG, was that a trade up or a trade down?
I'm a bit confused.
Trading her MG for a white Chrysler Libarren.
What about if the MG was something quite regal, like a magnet,
that was ex-government usage and was immaculate?
I think cake or an American band.
So I'm going to say it was just an MGB.
Rubba Bumper Midget.
Rubba Bumper B.
Rubba Bumper B.
Rubba Bumper B with ridiculous ride height.
Rubba Bumper B.
It's, you know, six of one half a dozen in the other room,
isn't it, switching it for a white Chrysler Barren?
Except if this was in the early 80s,
the white Libarren might actually be, you know, quite the thing to be seen in, perhaps.
Yeah, and the MG looks a bit old and past it.
So anyway, Andrea says, here's the question.
It's 1989 and you've just joined the Metro Dade Police Department
as Sonny Crockett was forced to retire after a shady operation
in which four kilos of cocaine disappeared from the evidence locker.
You daily are white Chrysler Libarren,
but you need something more fitting for your undercover job.
What would you trade it for?
And now, just before, Andrea has signed off with an Italian twist
on another thing that we say a bit.
He says, ciao, mate, grazie, mate, bye.
I like that.
Could it be a Riva Dirci?
Oh, yeah, you need to add that in, as well.
Ciao, mate, grazie, mate, Riva Dirci.
Quite long, but it's good. I like it.
So, yes, we've done a sort of Miami Vice question before, didn't we?
We have.
Yeah.
Similar thing, but yes,
switching a white Libarren for something more undercover.
I don't know. Just a brown Libarren instead.
What? I mean, genuinely,
a brown barren.
We established last time, did we,
that brown things on a case-by-case basis,
brown things can be excellent or not so excellent.
I'd have a Dodge Omni.
I'd be leaping.
I'd be reaching for the Pentastar keys.
I'd be switching from my Chrysler Pentastar key
to my Dodge Omni keys.
Yes, OK.
I'd probably have it in a fawn colour,
just because it's quite forgettable and blends in.
Like a female pheasant,
blends into its surroundings.
So, good for undercover, I'm going to say.
Is there not?
I'd send the head off to the UK mail order
to have it ported by some British guy in the 80s
who was still racing those kinds of cars
and have it put back on without telling the boss.
So, it was a little bit more responsive.
I don't know how much you're going to be needed
to do high-speed pursuits.
And then, so maybe your Omni plan is good,
albeit that you won't be able to do any pursuits
for, I mean, to the late 80s.
So, what, two or three months you're waiting
for the ship to come back with your...
With a head.
A cylinder head.
Big valve head.
That may be problematic,
but I'm wondering if...
Wasn't there... What was the coupé?
Was that also the labyrinth?
There was a sort of high-performance coupé.
Oh, well, they...
Hang on.
They did an actual Shelby charger.
That's not undercover, really, is it?
Do you remember?
Well...
When Carol jumped ship and went with the Mopar group
rather than folks.
That's what I'm thinking of, I think.
And I, for some reason,
because it's so fascinating to me,
even though the cars I don't think are that great,
I think they were a turbo four-cylinder,
I would like one just to say
I've got a Shelby Dodge charger
and people are like,
what? They didn't make them.
I went, I think you'll find they did, pal.
And I'll be wearing a matching,
highly flammable jacket with Shelby charger
written on the back in golden broidery.
Here's what I'm thinking.
Yes.
To the Shelby-tuned charger,
Daytona thing,
with a turbo four in it.
Yeah.
But you're right, it's too conspicuous.
Yeah.
So, what I'm thinking is,
because that's on the K-car platform,
Chrysler's ubiquitous 80s from Wheel Drive, chassis.
Yeah.
So is the Chrysler Voyager and all of those cars.
Oh.
What was it?
What was it called?
Was it town and country, wasn't it?
That's right.
And did you have the Dodge Caravan as well?
Yes.
So what was it?
Oh, Plymouth.
Plymouth Voyager?
Plymouth Voyager.
Yeah.
I think it was only the Chrysler Voyager over here.
Anyway, it doesn't really matter.
You know what I mean.
But that original boxy Chrysler generic minivan.
Yeah.
What could be less conspicuous than one of those?
It's just like every day,
they're all over the place at this point.
It's 1989.
But mine has a Shelby-tuned turbocharged engine.
That's a great idea.
I like that.
And it would have some stickers on the back of places you visited,
like the Rocky Mountains.
And then...
But you'd only run it on very high octane fuel.
So it was exceptionally responsive when it needed to be.
New plot, point of the Miami Vi series that we're in,
is in fact that I have a mate who runs a race shop.
Yeah.
And I go and see him because he's got a supply of race spec high octane fuel.
Brilliant.
That I can use to put into my highly-tuned minivan.
Yeah.
I'm enjoying this now.
The more I think about that.
That's great.
And also, by the way, just as a very important point of detail,
you're right on the stickers on the back.
But they have to be those very specifically American...
So not Disneyland, not Universal Studios.
It has to be hyper obscure stuff.
Like, I've seen the world's biggest thermometer.
Oh, yeah.
Yes.
That's right.
We've seen the world's deepest hole.
Divers do it underwater.
Yeah.
Weirdly, I have actually seen what was claimed to be the world's biggest thermometer.
It's somewhere out in Nevada, I think.
I bet it was amazing, Rich.
Oh, it's amazing.
It's a thermometer, but just big.
A flesh thermometer.
Andrea, thank you for your question,
particularly for your language suggestions there.
If you're somewhere else in the world
and you know what skin flute is in your mother tongue, do again.
Yeah, I think it's a great one.
Thank you for that.
I'm going to read out something by a person who's written to us.
Good.
They're from Bristol, but they're anonymous.
So they're just a person.
Good morning.
You well lubricated Marina door handles.
Quick question for the pod.
There have recently been a couple of high profile arrests
where the arrestees were driven away in an unmarked police car.
Should the dreadful day come when being a blog apologist
is outlawed and your collar is felt,
what would be your preferred choice of transport to the cop shop?
One, plain clothes versus full livery.
Two, if the latter, which livery?
Modern Battenburg or old school jam sandwich British police car.
And number three, any particular make or model to help narrow it down.
It needs to be something used in the UK during your lifetime.
So sorry.
No crown victorious.
Dammit.
I take it that my question relies on the perhaps
unsound assumption that you would actually get to choose
and that there are vast repositories of heritage police cars
being stored and studiously maintained around the country.
My choice personally would be an SD1 launch year jam sandwich
replete with its separate calibrated speedo
ahead of the front seat passenger.
Oh, yes.
Oh, my gosh.
That's quite cool, isn't it?
He's also, this person from Bristol says,
P.S. I'm a patriot.
OK, Rich, any...
I've been reading what you've been thinking.
What are you thinking?
Yeah, but then annoyingly, he's probably got my first choice
of a proper old school SD1 jam sandwich
with a really big like a blue plant pot on the roof
that's the light and a Neenor siren.
Oh, Neenor, yeah.
It's nice and old school.
But I suppose if...
Are we or am I being arrested for being too interested
in British Leyland and Austin Rover cars?
Did we set up being a blog apologist?
I presume so.
Being a blog apologist is outlawed and your collar is felt.
Yeah, OK, so it's a, again, just...
I'll tell you something else,
just because they sounded brilliant
would be an 80s Sherpa V8 riot van.
Oh, yeah.
Sweet.
Just for the noise, really.
And also quite spacious, you know, as a taller chap.
Yeah.
I feel that actually the back seat of an SD1
is not super roomy.
That's a fair point, actually.
I hadn't thought about the rear legroom.
But you'd have loads of room to stretch out,
albeit maybe quite a bouncy ride,
because, you know, it's a van.
I'm in a bit of an era turmoil.
I'm thinking Omega.
Vauxhall Omega.
OK.
Because I still like them.
And bizarrely, it's a bucket list car for me.
An actual ex-police one, 3.2.
So it's either that or do I go back to the 70s,
or possibly the late 60s,
and I go for...
It was either going to be a Rover P6 V8
for the sound and the agility.
But I think I might go straight six,
and I might go Triumph 2000.
Oh.
Because I really...
The Mark II Triumph 2000,
when I was in Malta the other month,
I saw quite a few old Triumphs.
There's a lot of surviving Triumphs in Malta.
And it made me realise how damn good
the Triumph 2000 Mark II looks.
I'm flipping. Love that, doesn't it?
I think it's a really handsome car.
Good saloon.
So if I'm going to get nicked,
I'm going to get nicked in that.
And I want it to be manual overdrive, please,
so I can watch the cop shifting cogs
while I'm going to the cop shop.
On that side of things.
By the way, just in case people don't know what blarg means,
can you just repeat what blarg actually stands for?
A contraction of BL, as in British Leyland,
and R, as in Austin Rover Group.
So it's the same company,
but sort of spanning two of its iterations,
or at least its names.
So 70s, 80s, basically.
Blarg, blarg, blarg.
Blarg, yeah.
Blarg.
Blarg.
If you're interested,
there's a very minty,
not ex-police as far as I can work out.
In fact, I'm sure it isn't
because it's only got 45,000 miles on it.
It has a 2003 Omega wagon.
But it's a 2.2.
There's a four-cylinder auto.
Yeah.
But yeah, it's an estate.
It looks absolutely tidy AF.
And yeah, only 45,000 miles on it.
So that's definitely not done any police work.
But it looks really here.
Have a look at that.
We've been tempted by the fruits of another recently
with regards to the Eagle Quest, haven't we?
There's someone's wafted a,
oh gosh, that does look good.
I'm just perusing the car and classic side right now.
Is this somebody, what?
Somebody's that Rover 75 Hertz?
The Rover 75 Hertz, which I think I need to talk to you about
when we've got a night in front of the fire
with a mug of cocoa.
Because the more I think about it,
the more the practicality and the exclusivity reign supreme.
So I think we should have a convo about that.
Okay.
Okay.
Where's the song?
Resistance of trepidation.
Yes.
I was just going to do a really quick question from a listener
called Andy who says,
hello you pair of wholly exhaust manifolds.
Are either of you aware of any celebrations
for Top Gear's 50th anniversary next year?
What would you like to see in such a series of programs
slash similar?
Is it next year?
I suppose it is, yes, 77, yes.
Gosh, I know what I'd like to see.
Do you want to go first?
Well, I was going to say I'm just not aware
of any celebrations,
but then I wouldn't necessarily be privy to that.
My suspicion would be that perhaps nothing is planned
because I think the BBC probably doesn't want
to draw attention to Top Gear and remind people
that the show is currently rested
and the unfortunate circumstances that led to that.
So I suspect they'll keep their heads down
rather than blow any trumpets.
But if they did, I don't know,
there was already a show
and that may have been for the 25th, actually,
because it was a long time ago.
And they just interviewed all the ex-presenters
and showed some old clips
and it was a lovely sort of warm cancer
through ye olden times.
So I'm sure that's probably somewhere.
It might be on iPlayer, definitely be on YouTube, I'm sure.
I don't know what else you would do
unless you really went to town on the editorial
and sort of got together old presenters, old cars,
and did a whole sort of new thing
rather than just relying on archive, which you could do
if someone was prepared to spend some money on it.
I just suspect that they're not.
And there's no Top Gear team to make it happen.
Well, that's a problem.
Are we going to get that call then?
Are we going to put it together?
I doubt it. Also, we're both quite busy, aren't we?
Yeah, we are actually.
But it's something that I'm sure they could do.
I suspect the wheel isn't there at the moment.
I would say I'd like Noel Edmunds back.
I would like Noel Edmunds to record some car reviews,
and one of them needs to be the...
pretty much the only car review video I see of him
in the archive on YouTube, which drove a Datsun Cherry.
I think it was a Cherry, a 100A Cherry.
I'd like him to drive that car again.
And then drive some other cars, including a GT40, of course.
I thought you were going to say the Fiat Strada,
which he infamously slagged off.
Oh, I bet you if he got in a Ritmo slash Strada now,
I reckon he might see the light, assuming it's not rotten.
Well, that's the thing.
He might see the light through the cells at the age of it.
He might actually be even more enraged by it
because of the poor quality that had manifested itself
over the last 50-ish, near as damn it, yes.
Well, I know he's... I've got to go back over to the Isle of Man
at some point to fetch my Honda,
and I know he has a dwelling over there these days.
Who? Noel Edmunds?
What? He's in New Zealand?
Yeah, he's doing both. I think he's flitting.
I think he's doing a bit of flit.
I'd like to... This is a serious request.
If anybody knows him and can put me in touch with him,
I'd very much like to interview him about his life in cars.
But when I emailed his agent to ask what Noel is driving these days
for a profile of Noel Edmunds in the road rat a few years ago,
his agent didn't get back to me.
At all?
No.
Oh, OK.
All right. Well, that's awkward, isn't it, really?
Yeah, you know.
Do you want... Have I got time for another one?
Do you want one more?
Yeah.
OK, this one's from Josh Stevenson,
and Josh is from a land far away.
Guys, look, it's hot chocolate weather.
Over here in Toronto,
we have just had a dumping of around 46 centimetres of snow
in one day last Sunday.
By the way, this is not from seven years ago, this email.
This was from the end of January.
OK.
Even though this took place...
Oh, sorry.
Even though this place is built for it with snow removal and all of that,
it was a shit ton of snow.
Our house has a back lane way,
and it gets to the point where you have nowhere to put snow.
I was walking the dog today,
and I stumbled across a little favourite of mine, sea attached.
This poor little MX-5
still hasn't had the snow removed off its roof,
and it's been a couple of days.
There is an MX-5, which you can't really tell it's an MX-5.
It has at least its height again of snow.
Oh, my God.
It's so snowed in,
and I think the snow plow has gone along the road
and then just funnelled it all over the car even more.
It looks like it's wearing a Victorian hat.
Yeah.
OK.
That's amazing.
So, Josh has got a question,
because that's the point of this second show.
My question to you both is,
what is the best and worst vehicle to attack a snow day in?
My Ford F-150 was amazing,
but not really the answer I'm looking for.
CMTMB, Josh.
Oh, that's a Canadian.
Cheers, mate. Thanks, mate.
Bye. Thank you for that, Josh.
What's the best and worst vehicle to attack a snow day in?
I can tell you the worst that I've ever experienced,
because it was not what you might expect.
As in it was a car you thought might be quite decent in the snow,
it was absolutely useless,
which was the Mitsubishi Evo 10
that I had as a long-terma from Evo.
Was it? Was it rubbish?
Absolutely rubbish.
Now, caveat here, I think it's the tyres.
Yes.
Because, as we know,
they can make a huge difference,
and any car would be a lot better on the snow
if it had the right tyres on it.
That Evo had some pretty, you know,
road-orientated, high-grip, good-weather tyres on it.
Yeah, some trackwork-related Yokalamas.
But when I had that car,
I lived on a street in London that was quite sloped,
and so when it snowed, I thought,
that's all right, I've got a four-wheel drive,
I'll probably be able to clamber up the street.
And I'd seen other cars going up.
It was still at that kind of quite slushy stage
where it hadn't cleared a full path,
but it was like, I've seen other cars going up the street.
It seems to be okay.
And that Evo, it just wouldn't go anywhere.
It was spinning all four wheels,
and then there was a hot smell that made me decide to stop.
Oh, a bit of a clutchiness.
Clutchiness because...
The transfer box was...
Yeah, I think it was something in the driveline
was getting a bit pissed off
with trying to move the torque around,
as it does, you know, it's a very clever system,
but it sort of needs at least one wheel
to have a bit of grip,
to be able to really do what it does effectively.
And when everything's spinning,
I think it was just...
It couldn't really help.
Yeah, it was really surprising how bad it was, actually.
But that's, I think, a tire thing.
So it's not fair to blame the car,
even though I hated that car,
but it's...
Yeah, it was a tires thing.
What would be your best vehicle to attack a snow day in?
I don't know.
I just thought of another one that wasn't very good.
And again, it's tires plus lots of power,
plus rear-wheel drive was my old Jag XJR
was a bit hairy in the snow.
I bet that was old.
I don't think that's not really a surprise.
Yeah, at one point I thought I was just going to do
one of those loads of lock,
but your car is still going straight,
kind of low-speed crashes into another car or a curb.
That's what I did in that Beetle,
which I was talking about in an earlier letter.
Exactly, it's just like, it's that.
And so, I don't know.
What's really good in the snow?
I can't think of anything that sort of really stood out for me, but...
I can tell you what I would have in the snow as a...
And of course, I'm quite a strange man,
so it's a left-field choice.
It's an AMC Eagle, Richard.
Oh, okay.
And I thought, because this is a letter from a Canadian,
I think they were on sale in Canada.
In fact, probably a very wise choice in Canada.
So, I would say I'm going to find
a really lovely wood-sided AMC Eagle,
and it will go anywhere.
And I'll be able to remind people that you don't need
a Land Rover or a Range Rover or a Land Cruiser
or a Jimny or whatever to go places.
So, that would be my best.
My worst, I have been caught in...
I was only talking to someone about this over the weekend.
I remember doing a promotion for Fifth Gear,
and I was called to a film day on Bruntingthorpe Airfield
for a Discovery Channel when they owned it.
And it had been booked in for a while,
and they wanted me specifically to bring my Dodge Charger.
And I said, yeah, okay.
And then, snow came in.
It came in that morning,
but it wasn't really snowy when I left the house.
It was coming.
I got to Bruntingthorpe,
and it was just completely white.
The whole track, everything.
And I'm in a Dodge Charger with not appropriate tyres.
And I have to say, being on the airfield was fun,
and doing the filming was fine.
The drive home was absolutely terrifying.
I think I drove home the whole way in Second Gear
down all of the back roads,
and it was just so slithery.
And I just felt like I was about to crash my own car.
Like that low speed, like you were saying.
It's only a low speed impact, but it will ruin stuff,
and you'll really hear it.
Yes.
And I was quite pressured.
Oh, I am quite pressured about that car.
So that was awful,
and I never want to repeat that again in my life.
I was so stressed when I got home, I fell asleep instantly.
You know, when you just run out of energy,
your body just has to recharge.
I just put the Dodge in the garage and came in
and just lay down and didn't wake up for 10 hours.
That sounds a bit partridge.
I didn't, sorry about that.
I remember it being a really awful experience.
So that's mine.
Well, that's about enough from this episode.
But if you have got a question for us,
hello at smithandsniff.com is the email address.
Put Ottersot in the subject line.
If it's a question just because it helps us to find them,
and we will do this all again next Friday.
Yeah.
For sure, Monday until then.
Goodbye.
Cheers, mate.
Thanks, mate.
Bye.
About this episode
Richard and Johnny share humorous and embarrassing stories about mishandling other people's cars, from slipping the clutch in a Mazda to crashing a Beetle in front of its owners. They also discuss quirky listener questions, including one about trading a white Chrysler LeBaron for an undercover police car in a 1989 Miami Vice scenario, blending automotive nostalgia with playful banter. The episode mixes personal anecdotes with lighthearted debates on car culture and music references, creating an engaging and relatable conversation for listeners.
Jonny and Richard answer listeners’ questions about the most embarrassing thing you’ve accidentally done to someone else’s car, another Miami Vice car conundrum, the police car you’d most like to be arrested in, and cars for heavy snow.
