Banger racing is a kind of racing where people use older, cheaper cars—often cars they don’t mind damaging. The idea is to keep it affordable and not turn it into a high-budget racing series.
That’s a Volkswagen Golf from the Mk5 generation. It’s a common, easy-to-find car, which is why people often use it for budget racing or “banger” events.
The Mercedes-Benz A-Class is a small car (a hatchback) made for regular daily use. It’s popular because it’s practical and easy to drive. The podcast mentions it because someone is using an A-Class as a racing or performance project.
The Mercedes-Benz B-Class is a small family car with a hatchback shape. It’s designed to be practical and usually offers more interior space than some smaller models. The podcast mentions it because it has a slightly longer wheelbase, which can help with comfort and room.
The Toyota Previa is a minivan, meaning it’s built to carry people comfortably. It’s often talked about because it’s a practical choice and has a unique look compared with many cars. The podcast mentions it repeatedly, suggesting it’s a well-known model among enthusiasts.
“Inboard engine” means the engine is placed more toward the middle of the car. That can affect how the car balances and handles, and it can also run into rules about what layouts are permitted in certain racing events.
A mid-engine car puts the engine near the center of the vehicle. That helps the car feel more balanced when you turn, which is why people associate it with sharper handling.
Term
Bangoracing
“Bangoracing” sounds like the name of a particular racing series or event. The hosts are basically debating whether the engine has to be moved for that kind of racing.
A livery is the car’s paint scheme and graphics—basically how it looks on the outside. In this segment they’re talking about how different color layouts can look good together.
The Jaguar XJ-S is a sporty, long-distance style car made by Jaguar. People talk about it because it’s a classic grand tourer, and some versions are very powerful. It’s the kind of car that shows up at car events and gets discussed for its history.
The Lamborghini Murcielago is a famous Lamborghini supercar. Here, the discussion is mostly about how to say its name correctly—“Murcielago” vs “Murcielago.”
The Porsche 911 GT3 RS is a special 911 made for track driving, with extra aerodynamic parts to help it stick to the road. In the episode, they’re describing a modified one with additional aero bits.
The Maserati Gricale is a Maserati car model. In this part of the episode, the host realizes they said the name wrong and had to redo the recording so the final video would use the correct name.
Car
Caparo T1
The Caparo T1 is a very extreme, lightweight race-style car made by the British company Caparo. The hosts are talking about a scary testing incident where a fire happened while it was being tested.
“Fifth gear” is one of the numbered gears in the car’s gearbox. The host is saying the fire happened while they were testing the car in that specific gear.
The Chevrolet Camaro is a famous American sports car. Here, they’re mostly arguing about how to pronounce the word “Camaro,” not talking about how the car drives.
A Porsche 911 is a famous sports car from Porsche. It’s known for having the engine in the back, and it’s been made for decades. Here, they mention a 911 without saying which exact version.
An engine rebuild means taking the engine apart and fixing or replacing the worn/broken internal parts. It’s a big, costly job, usually done when the engine has serious problems.
Car
K series
The K series is a particular engine family used in some Rover/Land Rover cars. People often talk about it because certain failures can get expensive to fix.
Term
I.R.D.
I.R.D. is a drivetrain component that helps send power to the rear wheels on some Land Rover Freelander setups. If it’s broken, the rear wheels may not get power anymore, so the car can act like it’s only driving the front wheels.
A timing belt is a belt inside the engine that keeps the engine’s moving parts timed correctly. If it breaks, the engine can be badly damaged because the valves and pistons no longer line up.
“Cam belt going boom” means the belt that times the camshaft failed. When that happens, the engine timing can get so far off that the engine can be seriously damaged.
Land Rover Freelander is a small SUV made by Land Rover. Here, they’re talking about which older Freelander years count for a car festival, so the exact year matters.
Four-wheel drive means power can go to all four wheels instead of just two. That helps the car grip better on slippery or rough ground, so it’s important that it still works.
The Land Rover Freelander 1 is an older version of the Freelander SUV. The host is basically saying that older Freelander 1s might become popular online and among buyers next.
A Toyota Tacoma is a popular pickup truck. Here they’re talking about a gasket near the water pump on Tacoma trucks from 1995 to 2017—basically a part that can start leaking coolant if it fails.
LIVE
I'm Richard Porter, I'm Johnny Smith, and this is on the other side of things, the Smith and Sniff spin-off in which we answer your questions.
Hark! Question time.
On the other side of things, our second show on a Friday, half an hour, answering your questions.
I'm going to dive straight in, as is my usual...
This is becoming habitual now. You are...
Let's start back around. We've only got 30 minutes.
I feel like you're being competitive. I feel like there's a competitive nature between you.
I'm just getting on with it.
I'm going to start with a message from a listener called Tom, who says,
Bonjour, my two favourite iffy clutches.
It's 2029, and Plato Racing is imperious.
His jackets have taken Wigan by storm.
He wants to branch out into banger racing, and has summoned you both.
What will your vature of choice be?
Tom French, or is it just like occasionally using French words, I can't tell.
He says, what will your vature of choice be, and how will you negotiate merging the colour schemes of Plato, Purple, and Smith and Sniff mustard?
Oh, easy.
He ends with...
He ends with, Salud tronco, gracias tío adios.
I assume that is Spanish for cheers mate, thanks mate, bye.
Yeah.
Gracias tío adios, I know, the rest of it.
I think so.
Anyway.
Yeah.
So what car are we going to enter banger racing?
With Plato.
And Plato Racing name, yeah.
OK, so if we are playing by correct banger racing rules in that it has to be,
at that point, pretty much worthless, not these crazy fools who like banger race worthy cars.
Someone banger raced a Bristol last weekend.
No.
I kid you not, someone banger raced a Bristol.
What?
Yeah, in 2026, someone banger raced a 1960s Bristol.
That's mental.
So it's 2029.
What car is about 20 years old at that point, or between 15 and 20?
Well you're sort of into stuff that would probably go, hang on, they only went out of production last week.
Because I'd like, I had a second gen focus and say at Leon's, the sort of nice looking one.
Yeah.
Mark V Golf.
Yeah.
Six Golf by then.
So I'm struggling with my Golf now, six I think.
So quite a lot of stuff, but what was Plato racing 20 years ago in BTCC?
Vauxhall's.
OK.
Vauxhall's.
So AstraZis.
AstraZis Coupez's.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
The Astra GTC, the sleaky one, which I actually think is quite cool.
OK.
So yeah.
I mean, they're a nice looking car, aren't they?
They are really good looking cars.
That's really incredible because they're for banger racing.
They're a very nice looking car once you've taken the lights off and the glass out.
And smashed it completely up.
Yes.
And maybe drawn cocks on it with a badge's tail.
Yeah.
That.
So that's one option, but is that a bit too obvious that he's just gone back to car he
knows or that we've helped him in that way?
I don't know.
Or we look at what Plato racing is doing now.
He's in Mercedes mode now, A-class, isn't he?
Yes.
Yes.
That's true.
You could get, but it would be a different kind of A-class if it's from 2009.
Yes, it would.
Because that would be a second gen, I guess.
They'll be a lot.
No, no.
The post-topple phase, won't it be?
Post-topple?
Well, I assume that the ESP and everything has all gone in the bin.
Yeah, all of that.
When we made into a banger racer.
But it's just, I mean, fundamentally, the central gravity is not super high because
the engine sort of lies flat, doesn't it?
Yeah.
A bit wide.
Or a B-class.
They could go for a B-class, which has got a bit more wheelbase in it.
But with another, it just feels like a slightly elongated version, isn't it, of the A?
No, when I said R, I meant an R-class.
Oh, an R-class?
Because that's got a lot more, you know, metalwork to soak it up.
That's not very valuable because nobody really wants them.
No, which is a shame, but they are rare, but nobody cares, I guess, now.
Are they?
Yeah.
I think so, yeah.
Yeah, I sort of always get the feeling there, one of those cars, that people who have them
absolutely love them.
That's true.
And they're very cross, they can't buy a new one.
But people who've never tried one or not and just don't get them and they just never caught on.
That's so true.
That is so true.
Much like, sorry to mention it, but we have to mention it every other show, seemingly,
but the Previa, the original Previa, you know, those cars that owners absolutely adored
and kept them forever.
And I think that the original Previa was available in purple, not quite Plato racing purple,
but close enough that it would be easier to give it a blow over in the correct colour
without something else coming through underneath.
They're incredible by our cars.
I think they actually might have been banned from certain events because they were just
too good with their inboard engine.
Oh, one of those.
Plato would like that, though, because he likes a car that people are a bit iffy with.
Like, are you sure you're allowed to really be using those?
Yeah.
So I think he might be down with that.
He likes mischief, doesn't he?
So a Prev, I could see him in a Prev.
Knowing him, he'd put the engine even further back so it would be like behind the driver
in the middle of the car.
So it's absolutely mid-engine.
Even though you don't have to move the engine in Bangoracing, I don't think, but so much
engineering goes into Bangoracing these days.
I think that answers the question, I think.
Yeah.
How would we negotiate merging the Kuliski?
So there is no way to merge them.
The problem is that I think purple and yellow could look quite strident together, but we're
going to just lean into it and make sure that absolutely every inch of the car has got yellow
and purple next to each other.
I think it would have to have a yellow lipsticky front.
Oh, like a Rover 200 BRF.
Exactly like that.
So it's got little pouty mouth of yellow, but fundamentally most of the car is purple.
I think he'd be down with that.
Well, because actually the classic silk cut livery Jaguar endurance racers, if you look
at the livery on a lot of those, they have the purple of the cigarettes, but then actually
they have a yellow sort of coach line that runs between the purple and the lighter colored
upper bit.
Yes.
So there is precedent there and it looked pretty good.
In fact, it didn't clash.
It just looked sort of unusual, but in a good way.
So I would go with a sort of that look.
So it would be faux silk cut, wouldn't it?
Or slut?
Yeah.
Knowing.
Yeah, in a way it would.
Yeah.
Slut racing.
I mean, there's an obvious extra letter that maybe Jason would encourage us to add to cut.
Oh, gosh.
Yes, I don't know.
Band from the Banger Seed.
There's kiddies here.
How dare you?
I think we've suddenly thought of a fantastic Jaguar Day livery for whenever there's another
Jaguar Big Jaguar show.
I did.
I did.
Mock that up.
We rude the fact that we didn't act sooner to go in a podcast promoting XJS to the Jaguar
Day thing the other weekend.
But anyway.
Another time.
Another time.
Well, I hope that answers your question, Tom, in a sort of way.
Yeah.
This is a letter from a chap called Robert from Rugby.
Hi, you pair of ITBs.
I have a quick question for Johnny.
The other week when you spoke about Giorgiaro designed car, I'm not sure if you were saying
it properly.
It sent my mind back to early fifth gear episodes.
Was Tiff the first person in the world to test the Lamborghini Murcielago?
Because in that review, he calls it the Murcielago.
I remember this and I remember the amount of defending, defense shouting from Tiff.
Because he said Lamborghini told me that's what it was called.
So I'm calling it that.
Yes.
And he said of you.
And he's right.
Yeah.
Murcielago.
I say Murcielago.
But I probably say Murcielago because although Murcielago, I think suppose is it Spanish supposed
to put a little sort of list on the sea as well.
Murcielago.
Murcielago.
Murcielago.
Murcielago.
But I don't know.
It does make you sound a little bit pretentious.
Maybe.
So it's a hard one to pull off.
It is a difficult one.
Murcielago is correct and Tiff was correct to say that because I remember Lamborghini
saying that to us at Top Gear and going, it's actually pronounced Murcielago.
And we're like, oh, we've already said Murcielago.
So yeah.
Sorry.
I do remember that moment from Tiff.
The question here is, is have you ever reviewed a car but should pronouncing its name only
to see other people calling it something completely different?
Keep up the fantastic work.
Look, your automotive chat chemistry is much welcome in the lorry on the long haul.
Thanks, Rob.
Ah.
Big up to the lorry driving crew.
We did one last summer at Goodwood.
Well, I did.
I don't know if you did as well.
I have a feeling we might have both done it.
We saw one of those amazing Mantae Porsches, you know, the sort of modified GT3 RS, what
it was, with the aero covers on the back wheels and things.
Yeah.
And I think I called it Mantae.
Yeah.
We were in that.
It was incredibly hot.
And we were doing that walk up the grid of cars going out on the supercar paddock display
on the hill.
And we were really up against it to walk down this line, talk about all the cars before they
all drove off.
And it was boiling hot and it was also quite high pressure and sweaty.
And I just, yeah.
And I was like, I kind of knew they're called Mantae because I've heard them called that
before.
Well, that's their name.
But I just absolutely choked and went Mantae.
And then I think maybe you might have gone, yes, Mantae, just to sort of not make me look
like to drop me in it by going, you first it wrong, you cock.
Yeah.
It's, I mean, yeah, I mean, I, I don't know if I, well, you know, when you misread something
and you just, you convince yourself that you've read it right and you just have to go along
with it.
And I had to effectively reshoot and re-voice every time I mentioned it, the Maserati Gricale.
Okay.
For some reason, I didn't see the A in Gricale.
I thought it was an O. So I called it for the whole shoot, the Gricale.
And when it came out for the final edit, realized, oh no, I buggered up its name and had to pretty
much rehash the whole thing.
And it was so difficult.
It was so difficult to get the, the sound right on the, the loud mics because of being
in outside and blah, blah, blah.
It was, so I've, I'm almost, I almost don't want to ever drive a Gricale again because
it gave me such problems, although it was fundamentally a pretty good car.
But yeah, the Gricale slash Gricale, it sounds better when you've got a slightly West Country
voice, I always think.
I was going to say, the Gricale, Gricale.
Oh right, listen mate, I've got a Maserati Gricale, yeah?
Gricale?
The one that came to mind with this question was years ago.
We had, do you remember the Caparo T1, that amazing looking thing that, speaking as we
were with Jason Plato, he, he got burnt by, there was a fire while testing it for fifth
gear.
That's right.
It did, it did, it did set him on fire a bit.
Yeah.
But before anyone was allowed to drive that car, they had a show car that they brought
to the Top Gear studio, and we just did a little segment where Hammond walked around
it and went, look at this thing, doesn't it look amazing?
I don't know, they hear the amazing stats about it, and you know, one day you'll be
able to buy one, bloody, bloody, bloody, bloody.
And for some reason, because we'd only ever seen the company name written down, that Richard's
said Caparo.
Oh yeah.
And we shot it, and the, there was a PR guy there who, well, he did say something, but
he said it like right at the end when all the audience were leaving.
He went up to the floor manager and went, oh, sorry, um, yeah, when, when Richard did
that thing, which was like about an hour previous, I needed that thing, he said, Caparo and it
should be Caparo.
Oh my gosh.
And the floor manager was like, well, we've just wrapped filming, so there's nothing we
can do about that.
Sorry.
And I knew nothing about this, because you know, it's kind of my department as the script
editor.
Yeah.
And trying to make sure the presenters said things correctly.
So, and the next thing I knew, I got a call from like a different, like the head of PR
or something going, you, you've said the name of the car wrong, I was like, well, no one
mentioned it to us.
And he went, yeah, my guy who was there said something, I was like, well, I'm afraid I
wasn't aware of that.
So we, we eventually found out what happened, but this, the, the big boss guy was furious
and was getting properly shouty at me on the phone.
And I was a bit like, I came a point where I was like, look, we've featured your car
on the telly and I'm afraid if you're a man who's standing there right at the front near
the show car, can't step in at the time and, and correct what's going on, then, and in
fact, I have a feeling that the guy was even there for rehearsals, maybe not.
But anyway, it was, it was all just about a slightly vexing situation.
My executive producer, Andy Willman, is sometimes knows exactly the right tone to strike to
be diplomatic.
Because I then said, I've learned around Willman and went, and I've had a guy from
Caparo, Caparo, having a right old go about the name of the car.
And I've basically told him to bug her off.
And we went, let me call him, I'll sort this out.
And so Willman called him back and in the face of this man's rage, Andy very cleverly
decided that the correct course of action was just to be charming and funny and disarm
the man that way.
So he went, hey, don't worry about it, look, what we might be able to do in the edit is
find another thing that Richard said where he's used the right vowel sound and we can
drop that in so that it makes it sound like he says, Caparo, not Caparo.
We just need to find the right sound.
So hopefully at some point in the show, he'll have said something else like vagina or something.
No, he didn't say that.
Yeah, I was standing next to him and he was on the phone.
And I was like, oh my God, Willman's decided that the best course of action is to just
be silly, ultimately, and try and make this guy laugh so that he stops being cross and
it worked.
But better than that, he was true to his words, put in a call to the edit and went, right,
we've got a little challenge for you here.
Find somewhere where Hammond says an R sound and put it in where he said air in Caparo
and he did and it was pretty seamless.
I'm sure people could find this on YouTube and go and have a look, but yeah, we kept
Caparo happy by making it look like Richard had said their name correctly all along.
Richard also helped us because I suppose if everybody else, to Rob's question, if everybody
else then started going, hey, here's this new Caparo and people go, well, but on top
of it, they said Caparo, so they're wrong.
It would have made us look like chumps.
So you know, it wasn't a selfless act, but it did involve quite a bit of tense phone
call work.
That's interesting.
We'll finish this now, but I just wanted to quickly add at the end that this quandary
with the name of Caparo, Caparo is my internal quandary with the Chevrolet Camaro Camaro.
I used to say Camaro for years.
And then when I first went out to the States, I heard people saying Camaro.
So I changed it to Camaro and have used Camaro for years.
But I recently heard on a YouTube video of a motoring journalist calling it a Camaro
and he's American.
And now I don't know what to say, like a Camaro or something.
I don't know what to believe anymore.
So is it Camaro or is it Camaro?
I don't know.
I can never remember and I often say the one that we would say and my wife being American
goes, no, I think it's the other one.
And I always get mixed up which way is American, ours.
And I sometimes just oscillate between the two just to just do both.
It's like trying to say high and die to Americans.
I do that with Porsche.
Oh, yeah, I do Porsche and Porsche.
I'm a I'm a bit of a 5050, a bit of a 5050 because Porsche is too long winded sometimes.
I can't be bothered.
I just shortcut it.
Porsche, why don't you just call them poor poor?
Well, you could call it a porker.
Oh, no, I don't like that.
No, maybe just refer to the model and not the make.
Just that's a box of that's a 911, that's a KN.
Yeah, you could do that.
But what if you just talk about the company that makes them?
The company that makes the KN and the McCann.
Yeah, you know, P word.
OK, I'll move on to a question from Alistair.
We'd never asked people to put where they're from in there when they sign off,
but everyone does know and it's quite good because it's just interesting to know.
So this is from Tony, who is in Stafford.
He says, greetings, you pair of crankshaft.
Oh, I've owned my car for 12 years now.
I paid £400 for it. Wow.
In that time, yeah, the repair bills have
averaged less than the yearly tax outlay.
A new alternator here, a new starter motor there, some tires once in a while.
Yeah, it's had good MOTs and bad MOTs.
Yeah, but I've been tracking the costs and the tax has always been
the third worst outlay after fuel and insurance.
In January, the car celebrated its 23rd birthday
and it had the most expensive MOT to date, £700.
OK, I could swallow that just.
I was then told that the water pump was leaking
and that I really should have the timing belt done.
So I tied a luggage tag to the indicator
stalk with fix the fucking water pump and timing belt on it.
Come March, I'd booked it in.
So obviously the next day, the valves and cylinders
got into a nasty battle for the airspace in the head.
No, that cost me £1300 to fix.
Yeah. Oh, no. My question is in three parts.
One, at what point would you have walked away from this 2003 car,
the MOT or the engine rebuild?
Two, would your opinion change knowing it was a K series
engine Freelander one with no back legs?
I think he means, as in the I.R.D. thing
that takes drive to the rear wheels as broken.
So you just kind of take it off.
Yes, you have a front wheel drive car.
And three, if I had dumped it, what should I have replaced it with?
Given a £2,000 budget until he finishes by saying, obviously, I kept it
and I'm now working through the non-essential repairs.
There are a lot of interest in your opinions.
Salute to Amici.
Gracias, Amici Valley.
So this is interesting.
This is a really interesting.
So there's a lot of better, the devil, you know, with these sorts of cars,
which is always was my dad's tactic and still kind of is with cars.
And by job, that's bangeromics.
So Bravo to the bangeromics of buying a cheap car
and having having your back all that time.
Shame about the shame about the timing belt issue.
Yeah, what at what point would I I think if you're in love with the car
and you've got and you've made some great memories with it
and it and it's always had your back for well over a decade.
I think when I and I had and I felt like I was responsible
for the the cam belt going boom because I knew it needed it for a year or whatever.
I would just go go on then unless it was hideously rotten.
But I mean, I've been in those situations
where it's hard to with your heart in your head with a car that's not a classic.
It's not appreciating value that we know of.
So I think I would have done what he's done and gone, go on then.
Let's go again. Yeah, I feel like I would have done the same.
You're right, because the MOT had gone, well, I've had a really good run.
Yeah. So this will just be a bump in the road.
And then next year, having taken care of these things,
it will be back to smooth sailing.
So I'd have definitely kept it past the MOT and then the engine rebuild.
Apart from the else, I don't think I've ever had to do this
because even my malfunctioning Panda 100 horsepower was working when I sold it
and continued to work actually for quite a while afterwards in my defense.
But yeah, yeah, so I don't think I've ever sold or got rid of a car
with a broken engine because to me, that
feels like going, oh, we're giving away our cat. Would you want to?
Yeah, please. Oh, it's dead. Yeah.
Why would I want a dead cat?
It's like, it's just, I don't know, something doesn't feel right to me.
I'd like to sell a car that can leave under its own steam.
So I think I'd have done what Tony's done.
I think I would as well.
And what was the third question?
There was a third question.
There was three questions within the question.
The second, yeah, the second was,
would your opinion change knowing this is a K series engine Freelander
with has been converted to front wheel drive only?
No, I mean, my opinion would change only as much as
I find it delightful to see first gen Freelanders now
because they were famously, well, they were famously developed on a very low budget.
So corners were cut.
It was a bit of a, you know, a kind of ingenious parts bin car in some ways.
And they were famously quite troublesome in many ways.
So when you see one still going, you go, well, you know,
someone really wants that thing to survive.
And I'm sort of impressed that Tony is one of those people because, you know,
I was always enjoyed driving the first gen Freelanders.
They were very pleasant cars.
And they were a revelation at the time for a Land Rover because they actually,
you know, felt sort of quite not sporty,
but they were quite dynamic compared to everything else the company made.
So I, yeah, no, my opinion only goes up.
And it's impressed with Tony's perseverance knowing that it's a,
you know, it's one of those sort of perpetual just throw it away.
It'll only give you more trouble kind of cars.
So it's nice to kind of confound that.
I think you should drive it to celebrate two festival of the unexceptional
and give it a little treat.
Yeah.
And that'd be really cool.
Well, it's, is it too new?
Yeah.
Is it?
It's a 2003.
So it is early, earlier Freelander ones would be eligible because it's 2000.
Yeah, I think 2001 they're saying this year is the cut off.
Okay.
The festival is an exceptional, but it's, it's near as damn it.
I mean, it's certainly, you know, it would be, it's, it'd be nice to hear that.
I can't, but where are Freelanders there last year?
I don't think I saw one.
No, someone will have like a funky yellow one.
Excuse me.
Or did they do like a jade green one?
I want to say they did a jade.
Yes, they did.
Yeah, yeah, they did.
Yeah.
In those early ones.
Yeah.
The day I picked up my metro at the end of the street where it had lived for the last 30 odd years,
there was a really tidy looking, very base spec, white Freelander one.
And it was an early one as well.
I actually stopped and took a photo of it.
I saw, I saw that.
No, don't need another white car like that.
But yeah, I saw that when I was filming.
I was distinctly remember it when I did the lunch run, clocking it.
Wow, that is.
It's got, I've got a photo, so I'll put it up here, but it's got,
it's got a real sort of survivor quality to it.
You just go, that looks like someone's just using that as their car.
And well done.
I think it was an R edge, but if he's going to replace it, I, the two,
two things that popped into my head, which are both saloons and quite dull,
but again, they'll be endearing because they'll probably have your back for a long time.
And you can just, you know, slink around in them.
One of them will be Toyota Camry.
Yeah, I don't know why.
Just popped into my head and thought, in the UK at least,
Camry's are quite seldom seen.
I know that's a shock to North American viewers slash listeners.
I know.
Yeah, we don't have birds here.
No, the cam, the Camry and the Accord, you don't see them around here anymore.
They just, we just, UK fell out of favor with them and that was that.
So one of them.
Weirdly, I saw one of the most recent Camry's just parked
in a field behind a pub yesterday.
Did you?
Yeah, we were sitting outside this lovely pub and it's on a hill.
So it's sort of the land slopes down.
There's a regular car park just below the beer gardening area,
but then below that there's a field where people sometimes camp,
but there was just a Camry park in there.
I actually stood up again because I sat down and I think I just saw a Camry in the field
and I had to stand up and there was nothing else in the field at the time.
No tents, no camp fans or anything like that.
Just a Camry.
You're like a rubbish bird watcher, aren't you?
Yes.
A beer garden bird watcher.
I think I saw a flying Camry there.
Oh, I'll take a shot of that.
Oh, you're going to zoom in really, really deeply with a very, very shaky hand
and take a photo that you'll never look at or send to anyone again.
I didn't because we were in mixed company with normal people
and I thought that my wife is kind of weirdly tolerant of this.
And my daughter would just go,
Daddy, take a picture of a car.
I go, yeah, how much, yeah.
Yeah, I didn't want to have to explain myself to other people.
So I just kept myself to myself.
I believe that the Freelander 2 is generally regarded as the most reliable of the Landrovers.
I think, I remember you telling me this before
and it's actually probably the only one I would own because...
See them around, don't you?
Yeah, they're just...
Yeah.
Well, they're the late Prince Phillips weapon of choice, weren't they?
The Freelander 2?
Yes, for stunt work.
I was just about to say, unbuckled, untethered stunt work was his speciality subject.
So if I ever had a Freelander 2, I'd just channel my inner,
fill the Greek and just, yeah.
There's a garage somewhere in, I think it's Gloucestershire.
I drive past it every so often.
It's sort of north of the M4, sort of coming from my neck of the woods.
And they just seem to specialize in Freelander 2s.
Do they?
And yeah, which I thought, oh, maybe that's quite a good specialist.
Because you go, oh yeah, we sell Landrovers, but only the ones
where the customer is less likely to come back and shout at me
because something's gone wrong.
So, yeah.
And last time I was passing, I was sort of trying to ogle the prices
because it's got the old school dealer, you know, things hanging from the...
Yeah.
The mirror, sorry, the sun visor inside.
I mean, I'm guessing he's sort of specializing in the nicer stuff,
hand-picked artisanal Freelander 2s.
Yes, yes.
Definitely, there were some prices that started with 3s.
Okay.
So, I reckon privately Tony could find a 2 for his budget.
Yeah, yeah.
So, that'd be my go-to predictable though it is.
And there's a chance the four-wheel drive system will still work.
I think Freelander 1s are going to be the next very young automotive influencer car.
That's my prediction.
Do you think?
No one's asked me this question.
It's not an autism question.
Can we go on to one quick last question?
Very quick one, yeah.
Okay.
This is one from a chap called Dan.
Hi, you pair of 1995 to 2017 Toyota Tacoma water pump gaskets.
Very specific, I like it.
These are getting better.
They're getting better and better.
Not sure how quickly you get through these emails,
but well, actually Dan, I'll have you know, you sent this towards the end of May
and we're still in May.
So, that I think is a record.
So, we're not, but we would nearly, it was last week.
Nearly nearly, yeah.
Not sure how you quickly get through these emails,
but I've just found out that Channel 5 have produced a new Alan Partridge-esque series
due to be broadcast later this month called Britain's Best Service Station,
hosted by none other than JLS boy band member JB.
A short write-up of the show, hosted by JB Gill,
the program explores the UK's favourite motorway stops
and includes a behind-the-scenes look at some of the most iconic and award-winning locations.
Wow, television is just on the nose these days.
So, the question is, what service stations do you both hope to make the cut
and who would you like to win overall?
He's attached a photo to prove that such a show does exist
so that he's not having one of these heatwave-induced fever dreams.
Now, I saw this email last week and initially assumed that Dan was
taking the piss out of us and that he'd mocked up the image of JB from JLS.
Yes.
But no.
This is real.
I checked, it's absolutely legit.
I then mentioned this to my wife and her immediate reaction was,
well, it's just going to be Gloucester, isn't it?
And I went, yeah, and then I mentioned it to another mate of mine,
he went, well, won't it just be a program about Gloucester services?
Yes, yes, I know, it will, won't it?
And then, funnily enough, talking about sitting in this lovely garden
behind a pub in the countryside where I saw the Camry in a field.
And there are a lot of us there, including a friend of ours with his two sons
who are like 21 and 18, I think.
And I said, you won't believe this, but there's this show coming on Channel 5
called Britain's Best Service Station.
And his older son, he's in his early 20s, went,
oh, yeah, with JBR, JLS.
And I was like, you've heard of this, haven't you?
Yeah, I haven't, so yeah.
Yeah, and then everyone round the table went,
will it just be Gloucester though?
And someone said, or Tea Bay?
I was about to say, Tea Bay, yeah, Tea Bay's similar ilk.
Ah, but you've got Lancaster with the big historic viewing room.
Yes, yes.
Which I like, I like that because it's very 60s.
But I like to drive past that and admire that as a piece of architecture.
It's not a great service station generally, is it?
I think any service station which has a lake,
an ornamental lake, definitely goes to the top as well.
Oxford, does it?
On the M40, it's not a lake as much as a water feature,
but it's quite nice and it's a spacious one.
It's because it's quite new.
That's good.
Okay, so that's in there.
That's good.
Yeah, that's in there.
There was a really good one up north,
like Northumberland service I stopped at a while back.
And it was one of those artisanal style ones
where there was like an oak-beamed eatery area
which felt very grand designs.
I thought it was impressive.
Oak-beamed eatery, yes.
They're doing a session on six music tomorrow, but I don't know.
I mean, that's the thing.
But hang on, Richard, hang on.
Oh, that Beckinsfield one that's quite new is sort of fine
in that it's newish and cleanish and it's sort of,
but I wouldn't ever go,
oh, wow, I'm going to make a special trip.
Hang on.
These are all incorrect answers.
As Smith and Sniff, surely we have to just nominate
Bulldog Services where this podcast was sort of born.
Forever in our hearts.
Bulldog Services, although I will admit it's bleak
and also quite generic.
Yes, it's quite generic.
I mean, it's not the worst,
except it does sort of have a deliberately obstructive walk
to the limit.
I was just up and down the service area.
And I'm hoping that JB from JLS has a similar criteria as well.
It's like, if they make you go through hoops,
just to have a quick wee, that's annoying.
I was just about to say that.
It's a bit like when you go through the patdown in airports
and when I was coming back from Belfast
or going to Belfast the other day for our live show,
you have to weave through loads of aftershaves
when I was pinching up here.
Yes.
And I was like, I don't want like bloody,
Jean-Paul Gaultier right now.
I just need a waz.
I know.
Just need a waz.
I had a double because going to from our Belfast show,
I flew from Bristol.
Now, Bristol has the same setup
and now they've got it at Belfast, it seems.
And it's like they basically build like a cart track layout.
That's right.
But surrounded by smellies and big Toblerones.
Yeah.
And you have to do all of these complicated
weaves around corners and chicanes and all manner of shit
just to get to the bit because you don't want to buy
No.
a bottle of Scotch or something.
I nearly tripped over a bucket of M&Ms
and I thought if somebody comes to talk to me now
or somebody digs me in the ribs,
I'm totally urinating myself
and I haven't brought spare trousers
because I've been traveling.
No, no.
Yeah.
Because you were wearing everything you needed.
Because I was wearing everything.
Well, I'm sure people have thoughts,
but why don't we just leave it to JB out of JLS.
He's clearly got a few ideas on this
and we'll have to watch this channel five show
to find out what they are.
But I'll look forward to that.
All right.
Well, that's that's quite enough from us for this Friday.
But if you have a question, it's hello at smithasniff.com
is our email address.
If you want to put Otisot at the start of the subject line,
it just helps us to find the questions
as opposed to all the other emails that we get.
Thank you and please.
And we'll do this all again next Friday,
normal show on Monday until then.
Goodbye.
Cheers mate, thanks mate and goodbye.
Thank you.
About this episode
Smith and Sniff’s Q&A 105 bounces between banger-racing talk and listener car questions. They debate what “correct banger racing rules” mean—cars “pretty much worthless”—and throw out examples like a 1960s Bristol, plus an Astra GTC and a Mercedes A-Class. The conversation then drifts into Plato Racing history, livery ideas, and a stack of pronunciation/production stories (Murcielago, Caparo, Maserati). Later, listeners share real ownership costs, MOT hits, and drivetrain woes.
In this week’s On The Other Side Of Things question answering show, Jonny and Richard tackle cars for going banger racing with Jason Plato in 2029, car name mispronunciations, a dilemma with a Freelander 1, and Britain’s best service station.
