Special Announcement! | The Car Podcast #78

Saturday, 23rd of May. Put it in your diary. The great British Jaguar Day at Bista Motion

with the car podcast, Chris Harris and Friends. Okay? We're going to do a live podcast recording.

All things Jaguar. You have to bring your Jaguars and you have to bring a cake. Those are the

great days out. Please come along to celebrate the thing we love so much. Jaguar.

Hello and welcome to the car podcast of Chris Harris and his friends. Early morning this one,

so we look a bit bleary-eyed. I apologise. Neil was up at five is to drive to the office,

managed to drink tea. Chris Cooper's an A. Surprisingly, unlit office looking like he's

about to do a hard day's graft. We're doing a hard day's graft. We'll start with,

uh, managed like these. They're rather good. Can we really imagine in 10 years time all new cars

will be electric? I've got a theory on this. I'll go into it once I've heard from Neil Clifford.

No, I can't. It's a simple answer, but I do think, you know, life, the world is always a journey,

isn't it? So it will obviously be different. I think what will be the case will be most cars

will be electric. A lot of those will have little range extenders. I think that's a development

that's quite a big thing now in China, isn't it? That you've got your little, you've got your little

tiny power in petrol engine that's at the back bit like the i3, which by the way I love. I love.

So you're never actually going to run out of electric. You're not going to be stranded.

You've got your little power motor. You've got your little five gallon tank of fuel, petrol.

I think a lot of cars will probably be hybrid. Probably hybrid is the solution, a mix of both.

And there will be us dinosaurs driving around in cool old petrol things that we probably

happen to pay a lot of money to do that. Five quid a gallon or five quid a litre.

Big road tax, you know, they'll be treated in a certain way. We're only allowed to drive them,

you know, 20 days a year or 50 days a year. But I suppose my instinct is that

because I'm sort of an endeavor to be an eternal optimist, the future will be decent.

Because my, you know, my kids, all of our kids, they still love travel and curiosity and journeys.

And so they will have their cars that they will love. They won't look back at us going, oh my

God, I wish I had a 993 turbo. Because that's a bit like my mum saying to me, oh, you should

listen to Roy Orbison, Pollux, The Jam, what a load of wrapping that is. You know what I mean?

Half dead and young people look forward like we did, you know, we watched

Top of the Pops and, you know, it's just a journey, isn't it? So I think in the end cars will still

exist and it won't be all electric because it's probably just very inconvenient for a lot of people

unless the tarmac, they develop a tarmac that you can charge your car while you drive along or

maybe there'll be some technology that solves these things or maybe it's a two minute charge

that you can just stop like you're getting your petrol and it'll only take two minutes and

so maybe there will be some technological solutions. That is always the case, isn't it?

Technology finds a solutions, not law. So I think there'll be a mix of everything,

but everyone still will be happy and they still will be driving about because we love that. It's

a human thing to explore. Manish, I'm going to avoid Chris Cooper for a moment because he just,

he looked very hitch cocky in a minute ago when it was just the light on his face. It looked like

the poster to an especially gruesome horror movie, I thought, as he was leaning forward there. So

he's now got the lights on so we'll just let him reestablish himself there and Manish can give us

his thoughts on whether we can imagine 20 years from now all cars being electric, new cars, sorry.

Yeah, I think Neil from that up beautifully. We don't know where technology is going,

but I think we've lived long enough to know which direction we're heading in. I think we all felt,

none of us felt very strongly anti-electric car. I just think we all felt and we have done over the

last 18 months of this podcast, three years of being together and doing this, that the government

was applying a Bunsen burner or a bunch of sort of slightly idiotic carrots to catalyze this

process. And I think, you know, we almost got, I suppose what it is, is I look at electric cars,

and apart from maybe the i3 or one or two others, the process was accelerated so much that these

things are inherently unattractive. They didn't go through a beautiful sort of evolutionary life

cycle. It was almost as if, back, you know, here's your press molded electric car, like it, you've

got to have one, by the way, you've got 10 minutes. And I don't think any of us, I haven't enjoyed

being taught to like that since I was five, you know, that we all rebelled against that.

But I think just taking a step back, you know, without getting too political, this global

political instability that makes energy prices jump up and down. If you just take Britain as a

very good example, we've got, I know we've got unreliable wind, but we've got wind, we've got

huge coastlines, we've got the potential of tidal, there's some HAPE. I think we nick

French nuclear, don't we, when we're at a deficit? I think building small nuclear power stations

to fill the gap is a really, really clever idea. And I think, you know, why wouldn't we want,

you know, our nine to five commutes, those really simple, slightly boring things,

why wouldn't we want them a little bit more electrified, whether that's purely electric

or hybrid? As the guy who lives in central London, the four of us spends 99% of his life here,

you know, I, you know, it's not a lot of fun driving Lola through Islington and dodging

hot oils or, you know, the London borough of Camden. I suppose it is probably quite a cool

thing to go and park her up at Scots, but I mean, how often do I do that? So if you gave me

a kind of great appliance for the, for the few journeys I make in central London,

I'd be happy. And if I am, I'm sure other people would be, but just as long as in 10 years,

we do have the right to, to stretch our legs, to fill a petrol-engined car. And yes, okay,

it will be at a financial penalty, which is a pity in some ways for younger people who aren't

even going to be able to afford houses. It'd be lovely to get them into I, you know, I see cars

in 10 years time, but maybe we'll have to do that on tracks rather than on the roads so they can

enjoy them. They can enjoy, you know, putting their foot down. So I think, yes, 10 years time,

I would imagine they'll mostly be electric. Chris Cooper.

No, it's the answer to your question. Oh, love it. Is there anything else I can help you with?

No, I'm guessing the message, don't worry. I think, yeah, I'll fill in, then you can follow me.

I think that as someone who loves cars and, and follows the motor industry quite closely,

I've never, I've always felt it had a sort of parity to real life that really every other

industry was going in the same direction as us, that we were trying to reap the benefits from

clever people and the technologies they uncovered for us and we benefited from them.

And it was all a journey of progress. But I feel that quite a few years ago, the motor industry

was, was just sort of peeled away from real life. And it went on its own trajectory, a bit like

Back to the Future 2 when you get the alternative reality and they go to Biff's palace and he's

got, he's taken over the world. Remember that when you get this dystopian reality where Biff

Tannin's taken over the world and you're just, you're horrified at what you see, that it's squalor

and lawlessness and recklessness. Well, the motor industry has a version of that to me.

We no longer have the same basic rules of gravity as everyone else. You know, every other industry

is looking to make things better, faster, more efficient. They're doing something called

progress. We're not anymore. We're sort of, we're stuck in a process of engineers trying to progress,

bosses that run car companies trying to appease politicians. And we've ended up with this rather

unusual soup that sort of bubbled to the boil for me yesterday at about 7.20am in the bus lane

near Slough with a lovely chap who drove me from Ferrari's HQ to the station because I've driven

a car up there. And he was in his Kia electric car, which is about a year old. And he couldn't

wait to tell me how shit it was. How often do we get that now? Where you get into a cab and the

bloke, there's a person that lives in this thing day and day and he goes, my Audi A6 was great.

I had it for three years. It did 180,000 miles. It did everything I wanted it to. This thing is shit.

And it's a really weird sensation to acknowledge the fact that the motor industry

is in a strange place. If you applied the pressures that the motor industry is under

to mobile telephones or crockery or something else, I think they'd all fare worse. I think the

motor industry has done an amazing job to be so resilient to keep our dreams alive and to keep

delivering cars that people actually want to buy. But they can't win the whole time. So my answer would

be, yeah, the majority of new cars will be electric. But I wonder whether something might have happened

by then to make the general population go, I'm not sure about this. I'm not sure about this.

If we can't fill a pothole, we're never having dynamic charging tarmac. Are we? That's not happening.

We can't afford a lot of this stuff. I wonder whether I've always had this theory that

countries will develop according to their local geography and what they've got and what they

haven't got. What have we got? We've got too many people on a small rock. They've got a lot of wind

power. Not a huge amount of solar. We should have a bit of nuclear. What's the right solution for us?

Is it really electric? I'm not sure. It is entirely electric, actually. If you live in,

you know, Iceland or someone like that, I can see it could be. But I'm not sure what our future is.

I have speakers at UK residents. It would be different wherever you are listening to, maybe.

I do believe the solutions could end up being quite geographical.

I hope what we get are fun cars. Cars that make us smile. But most importantly, I hope the

governments don't try and outlaw everything that isn't a new car. That's maybe where we're coming

from. If you outlaw everything that isn't a new car, you'll probably have some sort of insurrection

on your hands. I think that's right. Surely that, in many respects, is the best thing for the environment.

Yeah. It's a good point. Messages are so important. At what point will people realise that the greenest

thing you could do is to not buy a new car? That message. I've never seen that on a government

message. I've never seen them say, just buy a used one. Buy one that someone had before.

That's the greenest thing you could do. It's always, no, you need to have one of these.

I think that would really piss off the automotive industry if government said that. But it's

probably the reality of the best thing for the planet is don't make any new ones and most of

the new ones are shit anyway. So it would be good for the environment and would be happy.

For the environment and be happy. There's a t-shirt. Here we go then. The expensive restoration

that you will never get your money back story. Okay. Right. I don't know where to begin with that one.

So let's manage. I think we'll start with you actually because it's the one area of this very

carry pod where I think you can feel similar pain to us. I'm not saying that Lola isn't worth what you

spent on her, but I am. Okay. Let's just go manage. I had a little semi-story plan. Do you

know that Braddock is at that party at the beginning and he just wants to be left alone,

but he's won the Alpingham Prize and everyone wants to talk to him. There's a guy who goes

up to Ben. Ben, just one word. Just one word and he grabs him. He takes him into the garden

and he looks around shiftily and he says, plastics, enough said. And then he just leaves Ben alone.

I was going to say, you know, I have just one word answer for this. Lola, enough said. So

let's just leave it alone. But I don't know. I thought about this a little bit more and I think

is the expensive restoration as opposed to buying a car that ultimately you know you're going to

sell. So you'll use her. The real difference between a wife and a girlfriend. And I really

thought about this. I thought, why do you do an expensive restorations? Because actually

you're going to marry this car or at least you've got every intention of marrying this car. You want

a relationship that is going to go on for life and you have a word for it to keep her.

And it's romantic and it's optimistic. And it's just like, I'm going to be with you forever, baby.

And when you have problems, you work through those problems. I mean, God have I had problems.

As you know, you know, the problems actually I added them up are a quarter of the value.

I've spent a quarter of the value of the car on just the engineering issues. You know,

forget about everything else. Sorry. Five grand.

Somebody actually once in the comments wrote, you know, what a penis buying a 25 grand car

for 50 grand and then spending the same again on the interior. I think that's what they literally

wrote. Fair enough. But there is something kind of kind of wonderful. And I wonder whether

something happens then because the second part of the question was the kind of expensive restoration

that you I don't think we wrote regret, but that, you know, that isn't worth it in the end.

There maybe there just does come a moment where you go, oh, this isn't working for me. And it's

time to kind of move on in which case I think you probably just try to find the best next owner

you can if you've cared about something like this so much. You don't just I hope put it on

to a car auction website and hope that somebody's gonna, you know, gonna look after it. You almost

try to find a bespoke buyer. But I have to say, how far am I now to owning her two years?

There's been expense, but there's been so much joy. And I have to tell you right now,

if my circumstances stay the same or improve, I can't imagine a life without her. I really can't.

So, you know, I'm all for the expensive restoration for the keeper.

Passionate piece of advocacy that I completely agree with Chris Cooper. What would your story

be if you wanted to share it? And if you didn't, what would your anecdote be of someone else's pain?

So the question suggests that restorations other than the expensive kind are available.

And I'd like to know all about that. Yeah, I mean, this is the

it's the heart of our passion. Because it sort of gets to the heart of

the triumph of hope over reality. And our eternal optimism that this is a really good idea.

When we know secretly and fundamentally, it isn't going to work out the way we think it is.

But it doesn't change how we feel about it, in most cases. And I think I haven't

no nearly as a champion of this subject.

Closely followed more recently by Mr. Harris and managed by you. So I've actually got,

I've probably got the least experience of this. Maybe because some part of objectivity and common

sense has interjected itself. You're the most sensible of that. It's good point. You buy stuff

that's pretty much factory standard. Enjoy it. But I don't. But do I miss out on stuff? I don't

quite possibly. And no, actually, I'll stop there. You don't. This is really interesting.

This is about who you are. That's what this question is about. It's too early in the morning.

Honestly, the bits that are enjoyable are very enjoyable, but the downsides of

vacillation, dealing with things that don't happen on time, it's basically a constant

route to disappointment. It would drive you nuts. You just go, why is everyone so shit at this?

Yeah, I mean, possibly because my life is just too full of other stuff, really.

I mean, I've talked about this before. My mini-magic was, I allow myself to be

seduced by a magazine article when they first appeared.

And I probably haven't had as much use out of it as I should have done. I wanted to.

Did you restore it?

Yeah, it was, yeah. So I bought a mini 850 from a lovely chap who deals with

many down in Devon summer. I've forgotten his name. Some of you might know who he is,

having it Magwicked. That was the plan. I'd read an article in Octane magazine

when the first mini-magic was built. It would have been Cracky 2017, 2016,

a while ago now, 2017. And I thought, that's just fantastic. That's exactly what I want,

because my first car I've been a mini, a really shit box mini, was a fake mini-light

alloy wheels were worth more than the rest of the car, which is why when it was stolen,

the rest of the car was left behind.

And it has been, you know, the journey that I didn't do the restoring, Nick Swift and his

wonderful team down in Kent did the restoring, but you sort of lived the process. I mean,

if I tried it, I'd have been absolutely dreadful assets. It'd have been poly filler everywhere

and sticky back plastic and stuff. So it's the triumph of optimism, suspension of belief over

reality. But I do look forward to hearing one of my colleagues tell me about the secret access code

for the non-expensive restoration.

I'm not sure there is one or ever has been actually a new part. It's a state of mind.

And maybe it's a sort of controlled recklessness that you can allow yourself. It's an area of

chaos where people that aren't naturally chaotic or willing to entertain such dangerous moves

can go to because they've got some sort of a way out of it. They know when they start it,

there's a way out. It might be that they just got the resources to do it anyway. So if it

goes wrong, it's not a problem. I think if you're lucky enough to have had a few years where you've

earned a few quid, you can say, well, I'll do, you know, I'm going to put a lambs wall interior

into my 46m3. I don't really care if it goes wrong because I didn't buy a new Ferrari that week

or whatever. I didn't buy something stupid. And at the end of it, I've got this base car I can sell

and I know I can sell it. So I think there is sort of false pragmatism there because you've got

the resources to get out of it the other side if you really need to. A lot of restorations I think

are undertaken on that basis, but people don't want to admit it because it seems a bit crude,

but it is. I think if you've only got 2000 pounds left in your bank account, you're not spending

two and a half on fancy wheels because you've got to eat. On a quad-roy interior in an M5.

Yeah, exactly. You know that. You only put a quad-roy interior in an M5 if life was already

going wrong then. Maybe that was madness. But I think back in the day, there was, there had to

be this hope that it would be okay because you're probably not just dealing with your own money.

You're persuading a wife or a partner that you can do this with your collective money

and you're doing it instead of other things. You're doing it instead of holidays or whatever

else you spend your money on. It's pretty reckless. So yeah, they are brutal things. I think latterly,

the game has changed enormously because I think whereas they used to just be a folly that were

an add-on to your life, so you did all the other stuff. You might persuade people through

man-maths that you were not going to buy the new car, but you did buy the new car and you did the

restoration. So it's Neil Clifford flinching there because he knows what's going on. But

latterly, I think a lot of people have been, me included, have been choosing to tinker with cars

rather than buy other stuff because I find so much more joy in it than I do,

go walk into a car showroom and saying, can I have the new whatever because the new whatever

doesn't really interest me. I think that is totally the case and I suppose the little thing

that's developed there is if you've got that tinkering feeling and the fact that you don't like

new cars but you've got a load of money, that's where the Resto mod thing has come in, isn't it?

It's filled that vacuum of new cars are shit. There are people with lots of money.

Yeah, and I suppose I call myself out and I call anyone else out that thinks that that's rubbish,

that actually if you were told at the beginning of a restoration project that at some point in the

next two years after completing it, you would be forced to sell it to recover whatever you could

from it. I don't think you'd undertake it. I don't think you could. So there is an element of

starting this with a safety net. So cars on the table, my Green M5 has not been driven for

15 months because Dara, who's an absolute legend, we did the interior. We rebuilt the

suspension. I mean, the only thing on the car that has any relationship with the thing I bought

really is the tin body shell, different color now, and the gearbox internals are the same,

the gear cogs, everything else is different. And we've had lots of engine issues. So we rebuilt

an engine a year ago, no, about eight months ago. And through no fault of his or my own,

there was a faulty component that swathed through the engine and wrecked it. And we're doing it

again. So what does it owe me? Well, there's no doubt that on paper, it's a six figure E61 M5.

Now, I could have that signed by the entire, I could have that signed by everyone that's ever

won an F1 World Championship and have pictures of Bill Gates and God knows who else inside it.

And it's never worth that. The car is never, ever worth that. Am I, am I pleased by that? I'm not

pleased, but I'm not unhappy because I never want to sell the car, ever want to sell the car. I'm

also in a fortunate position where have I spent that money on it? No, I'm talking about in services,

in lieu of services supplied, because, you know, people work on the car and have to pay full rate

for it. So I'm a bit torn really. The way I look at it, this is the ultimate man mask. What would

I have done with the money otherwise? Well, well, I could find myself to the same genre,

the same vertical. So it has to be in a state, what estate car would I have bought instead?

The answer is there isn't one I want as much. There just isn't. There's not a car as silly.

It's my car now. I won't go through all the reasons why that's so important. We've done that

before in this podcast, but they are all subjective and quite powerful. But yeah, that's a car that

is totally out of control, the Integrale. I mean, I hate to think Peter has done such a

lot. The Integrale is currently, by the way, back at base at Peter's base, having a subwoofer put

under the seat, pods put onto the A-pillars for the tweeters, and it's having some different

wheels fitted and I don't think I'll ever leave them alone. I've definitely got the bug again.

I had this in the 90s. I love playing the cars. So what's that? What I hate to think. That's

probably, if I sold both of those cars tomorrow, I'd be lucky if they returned me even half of

what I've spent on them, even half. They are financially catastrophic is what I'd say. But

maybe because I'm a bit lucky because of what I do for a living. Those numbers would get closer

to each other, but I don't know. Neil, I'm not even told you the worst one I've ever done. That

might come later in this podcast. Neil, what about you? How are you going to answer this question?

I'm certainly not declaring anywhere near the worst one that I've ever done,

but may I just declare and talk you through for one minute the story of my 1973 Mini Bego.

So this car was owned by a wonderful man called Nigel Kass. He's on Instagram. He has the most

amazing cars, old 70s Mercedes estate, Citroen SM, Citroen DS, big American things, a team,

sort of camper vans. He's a dude. Then he turns up with this thing on Instagram and I'm like,

you know when you instantly know, because obviously it said it was for sale, you instantly know

you've had it. You know within 10 seconds that car has got to be mine. It's an absolute awful,

disastrous cancer that we have that you just like, I'm fucked. That is in your dreams go ballistic

what you're going to do with this car. You've never even seen the car. I'm going to go to the Isle

of Man TT in my Winnie Bego. I'm going to the south of France. This is going to be incredible.

I'm going to leave it at Corf Castle for the summer in Dorset. You know, your imagination

goes absolutely, mind us, goes absolutely crazy in this parallel life that you frankly are never

going to have. So I have a chat with Nigel. I do the most pathetic negotiation. You know,

he knows he's got you, right? Oh, well, it's, you know, I paid 25. I'd probably let it go for

somewhere around about what I paid for it. Probably untrue. You know, he's got all the history. This

car has been around America. It's got full service history from news, wonderful thing,

all these photographs, a bit fucking Yellowstone National Park. Oh my God, this is amazing.

So you strike a deal, which is probably like 300 quid less than his asking price.

And of course, you're meeting him because this is the sort of thing that happens

in the Brent Cross car park, right? Because you can't actually go anywhere else to pick

this thing up because it needs, you know, an airfield to meet and buy the car. And of course,

how are you going to inspect a Winnebago camper? You get in, start it, rev it up.

There's the MOT. There's the service history. What are you going to do?

Going to start seeing if the beds work or something. So you're like,

done. There's what funds transfer Nigel. I'm so happy with that. And then off you go. And then

within a minute, you have immense regret. Because you're like, this is really big. This is real.

It's much bigger in real life than the photographs and Instagram. And I'm trying to keep the wheel,

you know, the steering wheels, because obviously got a major steering rack problem.

And the right hand wheel is on the lines on the M1, but also the left hand one is also on,

you know, oh, this is big. And then you get it home and then you get an absolute chastising from

the wife. What the hell is that? Please, we don't need that in the house. Please get rid of it

immediately. And then you start, oh, at the weekend, I'm going to check it all out, make sure it all

works. And of course, the electricity doesn't work in it, does it? You plug in the thing to make sure

that no, that doesn't work. And then you, you know, I wonder if the shower works. Of course,

doesn't work, does it? Everything doesn't work. So then you embark on, oh, well, I've got to fix

all these things, because I can't leave it at Corv Castle and have my ice cream with my deck chair,

unless it's not fixed for the summer. So you get Steve, the famous, there's always, there's always

a Steve, who is the expert on Winnie Bay goes. So he comes and fix the electric, he fixes the water,

the, the honda, whatever it is, pump electric thing that's at the back, that's broken, that needs

fixing. And then the steering column, all we can't get one of those, we've got to import one of those

from America, takes us a year to find the right part. Graham, my lovely friend Graham at Vitesse

engineering near Tring fixes it all. I won't tell you how much I spent on it, but it's about 70%

of actually what I paid for it, or maybe more. I'm you even lucky, you even for deliberately

forget invoices, don't you? No, no, no, that I didn't pay that. I didn't buy the dog looking at a

shit in the corner of the room, isn't it? You ignore half of the bills. Anyway, I've now been

instructed by my better half that this camper needs to go. So it is for sale at Vitesse engineering,

and please contact Graham Hope. I've had a deal with Graham because he's so lovely that whatever

it sells for, he can have half because I just need to get rid of it. I'm on the three line whip,

it must never be back at my house. So it is for sale, I will lose a load of money.

It's a vision that I had for myself that never was going to exist. And it's really sad that,

isn't it? Because you have these dreams, we have all these dreams of what we're going to do in these

cars and vans and all this shit that we buy. So anyone wants an amazing fully restored Winnebago

camper at an extremely good price, please contact Graham Hope at Vitesse engineering.

If I was buying a 1970s Winnebago, Portland style style, the one thing I wouldn't want to

know about is its history. Well, it's basically breaking bad. This is the van in breaking bad.

I mean, you're right, you don't want to know what's gone on in there. The thing about the

invoice is interesting, isn't it? When I suppose the silliness, I've said this before,

part of our diseases, and the lack of common sense is you do things, when you're growing up,

actually do things before you can afford them. You don't wait until the right moment.

The right moment is always too early. And when I started racing, when I absolutely couldn't afford

it, I just left a really good job to go and try and set up my own thing. And it was just a ridiculous

idea. And as with all people who start racing, you get sort of suckered in by probably the least

appropriate people to start racing with. There's some sort of universal inverse attraction that

goes on. That's part of the learning of life. And I used to avoid coming home,

because I knew in the pile of letters at the back door, there'd be this whole series of,

and all the, you know, they're there because there's about three or four envelopes all at the same.

And it's not, you know, any of the tax year, it's not a brown envelope, it's a white one.

And I remember talking to, in fact, you know, Guy Spur, because he and I sort of started roughly

the same time, a bit earlier than me. And eventually we sort of fessed up to each other and say,

do you actually now open all of these envelopes? We said, actually, I've stopped opening some of them.

It's not going to make me feel any better. I think some of the behaviors that we

display in these moments are very childlike. They remind you of those moments when, at school,

you were presented with the awful reality that you hadn't done your homework and that you would,

you know, some of the shit you'd do to get out of trouble or to avoid the problems you were in,

where, you know, I can remember being at school when I was very young and thinking that

an absolutely guaranteed way to not have been trouble was just to go up a tree. You know,

I know I'm Simeon and my nickname is like that, but if it was break time or something

in my little school, I'd just get up a tree. If I was up a tree, my problems would have gone,

wouldn't they? No one could get me. No, you know, the teacher could go, you're in trouble,

I'm looking at you and I'd go, no, you're not. I'm up a tree. You can't get me up a tree. It's the rules.

Can I let you into a little secret, Chris?

Right.

Now on, when the three of us talking about you behind your back, we're now all going to use

expression. Do you know who's gone up a tree, don't you?

That's exactly what I do. And I think a few times with bills on cars,

I can definitely say that in the last few years, I've had individual bills that have been to work

on specific parts of cars that were much bigger than the cost of buying the car in the first place.

And that's just one. And you think, oh, there's another one coming. And at which point you're

like, well, I can't really afford to pay these. So, well, we'll just carry on with it, shall we?

I think you can go into ridiculous, into ridiculous places. And maybe when, when Chris

talks about being lured in by people that life tells you, maybe you shouldn't have been doing

things with, it's fascinating to realize how far into life you can go and still end up in those

situations, you know, where you think, what? And of course, once you've reflected on it,

you realize how utterly responsible you are for your own downfall as well. You think,

at no point, did I agree a sum on this? I could, I could easily in that conversation have gone,

do you know what, I'm telling you, I'm not spending any more than that.

But in this particular instance, I was so keen to demonstrate that I knew that the

E30M3 in the showroom had the special colored intake plenum that I was going to boast about

that, not say to the department, I'm just making this up. I didn't say to the person,

can you just make sure we don't spend more than this on that? But you don't, do you? You just

don't. Because you want to look like the big guy. You want to look like the guy that can do it all,

and you just cover absolute cropper. What I would say is, despite all of that,

it's my favorite thing. Maybe like all great things. I just love it. I love the journey.

I love the madness. I love the people you meet. I'm just going to type in this. So the engine,

you're going to see a good video update on the M5. But there's a man called Mr. Wobbles,

who I probably mentioned before. The engine's going back there to check its balancing.

To go to an old British workshop and see someone hand balancing your crank against

all of your rods and pistons, and he's called Wobbly Steve or something,

because he literally wobbles things for a living. You don't get to do all that unless you get

absolutely conkers deep in some sort of restoration, but you can't afford. So it is a labyrinth.

It's the back door to Mr. Ben's shop. That's what you want to be doing. I love it.

It's nothing. The only good thing that comes from it is stories, I'd suggest.

We should start a podcast. Good God, we could do that. Here we go. Best police car. Now we're

talking. Dash globally. I just don't know where to begin with this. I'll go first with Manish.

Well, I was going to talk about the kind of slightly cliched Italian Lamborghini,

the Huracan is the closest one, or the Dubai police forces fleet of things,

including their Aventador. But in having a quick browse, I found something really,

really special. It was actually on the Top Gear website. And in 1962, the Italian police

were getting a little bit annoyed at the speed with which the bandits that robbed banks were

getting away from them. So one of them, a guy called Inspector Spatifora, said,

Inspector Spatifora said, wouldn't it be great if we had a Ferrari police car?

At which point Ferrari sent them two 250 GTEs.

Yes, we've seen that car. It's fantastic. In black. I didn't know this. It had a tan

leatherette interior for wear. Now, one was written off very, very quickly. But the other

one stayed in the Italian police force, probably from 1963 to 1968. This is the one we know,

the Colombo, the beautiful Colombo V12, the 60 degree beautiful car, full speed overdrive.

I know someone who has one of these actually, but not this one. And I just loved, I love the kind

of final moniker about this car. It was loved and feared by public and criminals alike.

I think there you've got it. There is no greater for me, police car than that.

Chris Cooper. It's tempting to say the best police car is the one that's slightly slower

than the one I'm driving. Really, isn't it? It's an interesting question, isn't it? Because it kind

of me thinks that although I think it would be politically much harder these days to do it,

and in the modern world with social media and polarization and anger and all those things,

if say in the UK, as used to happen years ago, a Lotus or an Aston Martin or a McLaren even,

because they probably never did this, were to say just for fun, we're going to give you a 750S

or a DBS or an Imera. You can actually use for doing policing things. And I just think it would

create, I'm not sure good will is the right answer these days, but it's sort of admiration

that to say, actually, do you know what, that's quite cool. And I think that would, I've sort of

tempted, you've had a lot of, I remember in the, was it in the 90s, Porsche cars, Great Britain

gave a 968 club sport or a sport and for you to do it with various costs, and then they all decided

they really needed zero cost was because of everything being nicked in the 90s.

Take it.

With that, if it's Spender was the BBC.

The guy in the Northeast. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I was in the Northeast at the time working. And

it was, it's one of those very, very rare moments where a fictitious representation of life looked

exactly like the real one when you stood on three corner. While some of the dual carriageways going

around Newcastle. I think we should bring back that sort of, and I know Dubai is kind of famous

for it, but you know, Dubai is famous for lots of excess. But over here, I just think now and

again, it would do us all good just to see a police, police person driving something ridiculously

stupid. Just as a reminder to say, actually, do you know what, we're not completely useless.

I agree with you. My fear is that the level of lawlessness in this country now people just

try and race it, wouldn't they? They'd see it on the M4 and think, oh, let's see if it'll do 200.

But I agree. These things, the idea of the rolling police car, when you just had stock

going around the country, sitting at 68 miles an hour, nothing makes you behave more.

Nothing makes you behave more. It's the ultimate deterrent.

Yeah, it is.

My basic answer is I really like, as long as they're not chasing me, I think it's quite cool

that plain clothes thing, just for those little blue lights. When you see them zoom past the vans

and the golfs and all of that with the eight little blue lights front and back, I think, oh,

that's quite cool. You'd like one of those that you can just hoon around in and show your mates,

you've got the secret blue button. You often see it, don't you, with the, oh, previously owned by

Prince Charles, the Range Rover 322 that's got the secret buttons that you lift up and press

all of that. I also like black American V8 saloons with police written in gold.

When you see them parked, when you're driving on LA to

bloody Vegas or Willow Springs or you're going across those big sort of expanses of straight

roads and you just see one of those cars parked up behind one of those billboards, you think, oh,

that's a bit smoky in the bandit. That's quite cool, that black police thing. But maybe, maybe it's

it's a little bit cliche, but we've all maybe, if we visited the police, sorry, the Porsche Museum.

Yeah. Porsche did quite a lot of police cars. And we talked about it earlier, obviously, with

the 968, the 356 cab that they did for the Austrian police force, we stick a little picture up. And

I think they only made 20, but now there's like 50 of them. You know, whatever 356 event you go to,

even if it's, you know, in the arse end of Kent, there's at least one of those. But I think that's

quite cool. It's got a little blue light that sits above on the roof as a cabriolet. Pretty useless

bloody thing, I'm sure. But I do really like that. It's one of those things that does stop you when

you're doing that little wiggle around the Porsche Museum and deciding which one you want to stop

at. You always stop at that and go, oh, look at that. That's really cool, isn't it? I think because

we like cars, we obviously like police cars as long as they're not blue flashing light parked

behind you stationary. Yeah, they epitomize the fear fascination index for me that I have a particular

problem with these creatures. Most of the stuff I own has got a crab on it. Because I hate crabs.

So I'm fascinated by crabs. And they're all about crabs. Bit of a C1, I run with terrified me.

I think the police cars are a bit like that. You know, when they're stationary, when they're

inanimate objects, they're rather fascinated. But when they're in your rear view mirror, they

strike fear down your spine. And a bolt of electricity comes out your coccyx into the seat.

And you're like, oh, my God, I've got my tax. I now realize I'm a law abiding citizen. Because

if I see that blue light, I'm scared. That's what by the way, that's the definition of your law

abiding. If you're law abiding, that blue light scares you, you're law abiding. If you're not,

then you're not law abiding. That's the split there. So I, like everyone else, I had a good

look around during the night at cool police cars. And I realized that when you try and make a cool

police car, you're not making a cool police car, it's just a publicity stunt. And none of

them really worked for me. Because I couldn't imagine them. I couldn't imagine them in a pursuit.

Now, there's the France have got a load of A1 10 hour pings. I'm not really sure they chase

the robbers with those. I'm not sure they do. I think they probably do it in diesel mcgads.

And I, I'm fascinated by why the Dutch police used to have 911 targets in the 70s. Why a target?

And they used to wear these helmets and goggles, didn't they?

Yeah, you can't do that.

They would, they would have, it was a target with the roof panels out.

Yeah, really weird. So I don't really understand that. And I, then I thought,

no, the coolest police car is always, will always be that.

Yeah.

I just think it epitomizes everything from Minder, Sweeney professionals, whatever it is,

that the SD1 I'm talking about, but it has to be one of the police forces that had the enormous

ducktail fitted to the back of it, which must have increased downforce to the extent that these

things could be four miles an hour faster through certain slip roads on to motorways.

Would that be called the jam sandwich?

Yeah, it was a jam sandwich.

Yeah.

Just, I absolutely love them. I have to have a look at them. I think

it might have been enough to try and become a police officer so you could drive one.

No, they just, they're everything. So there are some cool ones. And I did do a top gear film

where they rolled out their fleet of stuff, which Crescendoed in a Veyron,

they had a police Veyron. And when you ask them whether they use it, they won't know,

it costs the fortune to run it. We just roll it out for idiots like you.

So, yeah, you're not going to get caught by a Veyron.

The 850 estate T5 ran it close because that, yeah, I suppose in some respects,

the other way to look at this is, can you imagine being a police officer and reading it and also

being interested in cars and really a car magazine going, whoever designed and finished that car

had an inkling, it might be a good police car. I think there's always a sense whoever did the

T5 wagon was definitely thinking there's a certain part of demographics going to enjoy this and

other ones that enforce the law. Yes. I think, can you imagine how cool it would be to know

that you'd actually inadvertently made the ultimate police car, which they probably had.

What were those big Vauxhall 80s, GSI 24 valve things?

Well, they were clever because they were so fast in a straight line. They do 150 on the motorway.

Yeah. Yeah. And if they had all their safety gear in the boot,

the rear ride height was always a little bit rolly-poly. They would be right down on their

arses. Have you been pulled over by a police Vauxhall senator?

No. I have. It's probably the car I've been pulled over by most without wishing to give the

impression that it's a routine occurrence in my life. It's probably that's the one I've been

pulled over with most, which hopefully suggests it's in my life. I suppose when we had our

Renault 5 Turbo 205, that was the, you know, the SD1 had gone. That was the big copper car,

wouldn't it, of the late 80s? Yeah. I think, well, the Jags were quite common for a bit as well,

weren't they? Quite a few FJ6s around. I think the great thing about the senator was that when

you had to sit in the back seat, they kept the velour bench so you didn't have the leather.

The velour was comfortable and it was a lot of space. I always remember thinking,

this is very spacious. Right, but offering an impromptu road test of the rear seat environment

wasn't what they were looking for at the time for me, certainly. They wanted to have a different

chat. Right, let's move on. I'm not going to design your perfect city car this week because

we've already had a good chat about quite dull electric cars, which is what we're going to end

up talking about. So I don't want to send everyone to sleep more than they already are. So let's go

on Sunday morning in the small hours in Melbourne. First race of the season, give me your thoughts.

Chris Cooper.

It was worse than watching the F1 movie in some respects in terms of its artificiality.

I hate to say it. I mean, I was delighted for George and really, I mean, well done Mercedes

for sorting that out so well. And it was an interesting spot, not a spot, but it's an interesting

observation by those in the media this week, contrasting McLaren's previous statements about

the closeness as they're working with Mercedes over the winter. And then some of their comments

over the weekend about we're sort of in the dark about how this Mercedes engine is supposed to

work in our car. My straw poll of particularly young people has been, it's all a bit silly.

And you can't tell, it's like Mario Kart. You can't tell what wisely Claire got past Russell

there. And when you watch the onboards, the onboards are just awful. Max made a good observation,

didn't he? He said, look, you know, and this is true, and we all know this. If you gave them

golf carts and golf buggies, they'd all race golf buggies, because they're racers and they love

racing and they want to win. They want to see how can I make my wonky golf buggy go slightly

faster than his wonky golf buddy? If you give them shopping trolleys, they find a way,

they'd all be, they would say, that's the shopping trolley you want. That one over there,

it's got slightly more caster on it and it will go better. And you'd all be arguing over which

was the best shopping trolley like, you know, Chris, when we do when you go to any kind of

arrive and drive carting, after a while, you work out who's got it's number seven, the one you

want. But if you're not winning, it's just a shit shopping trolley. It's not much fun to drive.

And it feels like an extraordinary position to have got to that such a sophisticated, well run

sport, organization, governance, commerciality has got itself to this point where it's sort of

everybody can see something has to change. So it's the first race I haven't got up to watch for

a long time. I watched qualifying. I did watch that and that was just to see how it all went.

The start was chaotic because I think the one of the reasons why George's start was so bad was

he didn't have enough heat in his tires because he didn't have enough battery and that sort of

when the blue light goes on so they can all rev their engines. It's just, I mean, that was just

just awful. So as a, I was going to say as a purist, I don't think it's because I'm a purist.

Because that suggests old fashioned and funny and I'm absolutely not.

In every respect, almost every respect, I think everyone is in a great place.

Really, really great place. But the fallacy of how far they move the dial when even the electric

energy comes from burning hydrocarbons. Yeah. Somebody, it just goes to even in the biggest,

most complex, seemingly well run organizations. Sometimes you do need somebody somewhere to say,

stop. Yeah, I agree. I think that's why you sometimes do need to live in a banana dictatorship

because there's one person if he'd been involved in this sport that would not have allowed this to

happen. Be at some point, if this had happened in Bernie's era, he'd have gone, lads, this is

fucking stupid. And it wouldn't have happened. Manish. It's just very hard to argue against

anything that Chris has just said. I wonder if your average audience though, your non F1

asficionado feels the same way, because what I would say is there's a little line emerging here.

And you can shoot me down, but I don't watch Drives Survive. I think it's just pure entertainment.

It's entertainment over any form of reality. Somebody showed me a little clip of, I can't

remember who sent it. It was a clip of Lewis having a chat with Toto about leaving William,

Mercedes a couple of years ago, and it was just so contrived. The camera angles were contrived.

They have this kind of, as if there was really going to be a camera at that meeting. But it's

all fun. And then you've got the F1 movie, which is also just so contrived. I thought it was,

I mean, I found it reasonably unwatchable. I understand lots of cameras or the clever gizmos

in it. And now basically it's infected the actual racing. And I think if you look at the line, it's

all about formula one has always been a very difficult arbitrage between entertainment and

sport, probably the hardest one, because there isn't that much difference in tennis rackets,

and everyone uses the same ball. So ultimately, you know, the percentage of tennis player involved

is very high. The problem with formula one for me is that in this constant pursuit to create

this mega entertainment on TV, it just, you know, the drivers becoming so much less of the equation.

Gary Anderson wrote a brilliant piece, I think, in the telegraph simplifying what is really going

on. And he said that look, the drivers may be 20% of the equation. Now, the driver doesn't decide

when to cut the power to the rear wheels. You know, computer decides that decides what the

optimum battery charging is. The driver's got two different methods of boosting his speed.

He said they're way out of proportion. You know, you basically get way too much power from pressing

that button, which is what produces this bizarre ability to overtake at any point. And a friend

actually sent a very nice text about this. It was a great analogy. He just said, imagine every

over you play in cricket as a batsman, you're allowed to use your bat twice. And it's a very

special bat that's made out of some material. We can just whack the ball into the next city.

So what you do is you basically guarantee two, sixes and over. And that's all very exciting on

television. You know, people talk about the seven changes of, you know, lead between George and

Charles. But at some point people work out that's not real, whatever real means. And then I think

the sport will suffer for it. Because it's not pure entertainment. At some point, there's a reason

why, you know, this is supposed to be the pinnacle of motor racing, that it's supposed to be a sport.

We get told how brilliantly athletic the drivers are. They're not the fat old bastards of the 70s

and 80s smoking away. They're not fit. These are, you know, supreme athletes. They work very hard

with their engineers. In theory, they're building these amazing cars and, and shaping what this is

going to be. And it just feels to me like a very two left footed manufacturer sport. And we talked

about the fact that Audi were extraordinarily insistent on this formula. But even this number,

50% electricity, 50%. I said, why, why that number? Why 50, 50? Why not 60, 40? Why not 70, 30? I'll

tell you why, because it's a slogan, isn't it? It's just marketing press release. It's just a

press release. So our sport, it just, I just look at the lines. You've got a contrived behind the

scenes show, which will even show Father Christmas at a team principal's house. I mean, it's that,

that absurd. You've got a movie, I don't know, a guy who had an accident as distasteful, you know,

as Martin Donnelly's, they recreate that. And then he becomes a sort of mega kind of, you know,

driver in this bizarre story. And now we've got a sport where you don't know, you contrive the

racing for television. I bet you 99% of people who are really not into the sport who turned it

on probably found it extraordinarily exciting. I mean, all the midfield guys said it was like

Super Mario, because we didn't get to see that quite so much. They were just going, oh, I've

been taken back. I've been taken back. I would, I'm the same as Chris Cooper. I watched Qualifying.

I didn't watch the race live or watch the on catch up. I echo all of their thoughts really.

I feel, I feel they're a bit of a reflection of the pickle, the motor industry in itself in that

they're trying to appease too many groups of people, they want to create great racing,

they want to look like they're moving with the times, they want to keep the politicians off

their backs, they don't get outlawed. And what they've ended up with is, you know, they've got their

paint pot of all the different colors that you had at school, you know, yellow, green, whatever,

mix them all together and they got brown, which is what I always ended up with. I always ended

up painting in brown because I wasn't very good at managing my mixing technique.

And they've got, and in this case, brown is another metaphor for the quality of what we saw.

Telling, I watched the catch up with someone who doesn't know much about racing and they

immediately got it. They went, they could spot the difference between a hard fought overtake

and an overtake that happened because someone's car wasn't functioning properly. Just the language

of the cars is so different. When one is looking to try and force itself past another, it looks

very different to one just going, oh, fuck, you're not going very fast, I'll just drive past you.

So let's be positive. I think the cars actually look good. I think they look quite good looking

objects compared to last year. I think they look quite fast. And I think at times, maybe the one

positive corollary of the fact that the drivers don't quite know what's going to happen next is

the cars look a bit skittish. They look, sometimes you can see they're hanging onto the bloody things

and particularly into braking zones with this ludicrous deployment of the front wing,

when the front wing decides to sort of go up again, they look very difficult to manage.

And when you, when you've got drivers falling off because of that, you know, it's difficult.

I do think that by mid-season, they might have this sorted out. I really do. I think they could

have something that's very, very watchable and also throws up all sorts of unexpected results

from cars we didn't think were going to win. So that's, I think, if they get their heads together

and realise how serious this is, that maybe they could make this work. I still don't believe in

50-50. There's an amazing conspiracy theory about Yui and Honda that they saw this coming

and that they've designed an engine that will work for regulation that might happen in three months

time. Yes, there is that conspiracy theory out there. I mean, it just, it also, it looked

at times a bit unhinged. I thought, you know, Colopinto's near miss off the start is

as close to a massive shunt as I've ever seen in my 40 years of watching the sport. I mean,

how you miss that, Mr Colopinto, I don't know. And I think that when you have unprecedented

change in us, in a formula like motorsport, you do have these areas where it, you have to remind

yourself, these, these lads are out there, not really knowing what's going on. Lando struck a

note of, of genuinely being worried by the end. He was saying, we're going, you know, we are going

to have a crash. I said that about the situation once and that's what happened. So I, I fear for

the drivers in that respect because they don't quite know what's going on. I mean, to have

a driver of the quality of piastry fire it off on the way to the grid. I mean, he must have just

been thinking, what, what can I do right here? You know, he's done nothing wrong. He made to

look an absolute idiot in front of his own crowd and he's not his fault. That's a bit like, you

jockstrap on. It's, it's bloody difficult that. So I don't know. I want, I want to support it,

but it's quite telling that I didn't get up to watch it. So I, I really, I think they will sort

it out. No, Clifford, did you watch it? I did the same as you. And then you've got that paranoia

avenue of six o'clock. I can't look at my WhatsApps. I can't look at my phone. Every

bugger is going to have told me what happens. I've got to find a way of turning on the telly and

pressing the record thing without even seeing the news. It's quite a nerve wracking little moment

that to try and watch it without knowing the score. Because if you know the score, then you're

buggered, you're like bollocks. I'm not going to watch it at all. And would have saved me a couple

of hours. I clearly don't know very much about all or I don't care very much maybe about all these

rules. It's obviously a press release, all a bit annoying, this electric thing. I thought the racing

seemed quite exciting. There you go. If I'm just a Mr. Layman, and you know, I do enjoy Drive to

the Vive. We all sit down and say, shall we watch it? We did it last night. Emma was desperate to

watch the Christian Horner one to see all the drama of all that. I think it's got a lot of people

into Formula One. It's broadened its audience and it's got younger and all the stuff that

strategically they probably needed to do for money reasons. It's all about money, isn't it?

I thought because the cars look smaller, they look faster. I don't think they are faster,

are they? Because they were sort of darty and moving around. They look faster because they're

moving around. They're obviously faster in a straight line. Are they? At some points,

apart from when they're not, but they're slightly more on edge because they've got less down for

smaller tyres. So they look like you're driving them and that's the same as Chris said earlier.

I think the car bit of the cars is actually quite good. Yeah, I think the cars look better because

they look smaller and less fat and they've had a bit of a zen pick, haven't they? They just look

sleeker. And I don't know really. Do you think they're going to change the rules,

should they? They say they are. Because it looks like the two Middle Eastern races may

well be cancelled. So we have China coming up and then I think, is it before Japan or after?

What's after China? Is it supposed to be Japan? Yeah, so then if the two Middle Eastern races

don't happen, there's a good chunk of time to do some thinking. I mean, you made such a good

point there, Mr Harris, about Oscar. Someone like that doesn't just chuck it off on a formation lap.

Ditto Max on his first qualifying lap. That's horrific. He touched the brakes. I assume the

harvesting system decided, oh, gonna lock the back wheels now. I mean, I do think it's a little

bit scary that you can be on a straight and then a computer basically, beyond lifting and coasting

can start to super clip. And I hate the word deployment. I mean, what's that? What's that?

You know, it's such an odd word. Throttle is a nice word.

Yeah, it's massive. It's so complicated. The only equivalent I can have in modern sport

is the scrum in Rugby Union. So for me, it embodies something, an edifice or a part of

the game that's incredibly complicated and subtle. But most people have no idea what's going on.

All they see is basically 16 blokes trying to shunt the shit out of each other. But there's

so much technique and skill involved in that you don't see it and you need normally a commentator

that's played at that level in that scrum to deconstruct it for you. And we've got that with

this sport. I don't think anyone realizes how complicated. No, the drivers are having to do

just to complete one lap without falling off is absurd. And that you have to conclude that gets

in the way of racing. Yeah, you have to. Yeah, logical. Who was saying he's he's got his eyes

off the road for a very high percentage now of of a lap. He's just literally looking down at his

steering wheel. As you said about the onboards, what I found very frustrating about the onboards,

I wonder whether they're going to have to cut some of the onboards is you're almost just looking at

the battery, you can see the car slow down and the battery charge up. It's a very, it's a very

weird phenomenon. You know, the guy hasn't whacked the brakes to do that. It's I mean, it's just it

for yeah, for a purist for an old man. This is this I found it very difficult to watch and I did

get up. Yeah, mostly because I thought the three of you would and you tell me who won when we did

the emergency pod, we should have sent a text they don't get up. No one will talk about it.

I think. Yeah, they'll fix it. They have they have a habit of always doing so.

Of course. But I just I don't, I don't understand why they haven't got a figurehead like a Bernie

that could just say, look, you know, Stefan has got the power. Come on, lads, we've gone into this

with the correct intentions. But we're, you know, we've made it so complicated for ourselves.

Right, let's move this on. We've got a few minutes left before we have to go off to work.

We're going to do four car garage now. It's called it's a four car garage because we didn't do a

two car garage last week. And we did, but it was a bit bodgy. Yeah, we need to do it better this

week. Actually, I think I think the result was absolutely fine. I've had correspondence with

that edifice and they are more than happy. So I can tell you now that the search on car and classic

through the small hours of the morning has been very bright from the UK. I've been looking

at Aston Martins all night jet lag to shit as usual. And I know all about Rapides and all about

very many Aston Martins. I mean, one of those early V12 vantages they're winking at me,

a 2010 car manual gearbox. What a car that was. Here we go. This is Neil Clippers four car garage.

You've run out of patience energy and enjoyment of driving cars in the UK because of the potholes.

Fortunately, you work for a multinational business with the ability to relocate and

following research of the fastest repair of potholes country he's decided to move to Japan.

You rented a one bedroom apartment, but with four car parking spaces and your company

is giving you £70,000 relocation costs, which you're going to spend on four cars,

which you which you purchased on car and classic classified before you leave.

You need a hot hatch, a convertible and a state car and a limo for you. This is a very,

very mean budget. I think it's not a lot of flesh on the bone here.

More interesting with the with that budget goes first to to manage. Oh, okay.

Since it's four car garage, and we're going to talk too much about them. But my hot hatch,

I found a Mark two golf GTI black manual right hand drive, but we just 40,000 miles on it.

Nice 35 year old car with 1000 miles a year for £19,995 on the classified.

Beautiful thing. 18,995 for my convertible. I found a 2018 a bath one two four spider GT manual.

Apparently, there are only 15 manuals in the UK to right hand drive. That's a stunning car.

And that's £20,000 in the classifieds. I'm going to be a bit boring about my state.

And it also has dark glass and it has black wheels. But I figure you're in Japan.

You can they have curtains on the sides of their car. So this works. It's a three series BMW

2021 72,000 miles. But again, £20,000. It's dark grits pristine. Look at that thing.

And my last car. I know you don't love them, but I do the W220S class five liter limousine.

So it is long wheel based. It's only got 41,000 miles and it's 13,000 pounds. It's silver and

black. It's stunning. Good. And my total cost, this is in the classifieds comes to 72,000 pounds.

And I think with a little bit of finaddling, I reckon I can probably get that 2000 pounds down.

So that's my four car garage. I can't argue with that at all. I'm going to go next. So

hot hatch. I don't know which Civic that is. But it's a 1.6 I 16. They were they rev like

those things. They're really good. That's 14 grand. So I'm having a civic I'm taking a Japanese car

back to Japan. This is the best value car. I mean, if it's not terrible, this is the best value car

I've seen this year. Little red MGF for three grand. Yes. I think you could you could just

live your Britishness your midnight in Tokyo in rather in a rather nice hydro pneumatic way.

Was that hydro elastic? Was that hydro pneumatic that one? I don't know. I think it was, isn't it?

There's a limo only means one thing. It means one of those. So I don't really know what you do with

that. But it's a limo. Everything else is called a limo. It's a long wheelbase saloon car. A limo

is something that you saw in a Hollywood movie in the 80s. And that's one. What is it? It's a link.

It's a Lincoln. It's got 67,000 miles. It's located somewhere you don't want to go. So

and your estate car has got to be a pretty free facelift 124. Yeah. Little 200 engine

because you can't go fast in Tokyo. But I think the pre facelift 124s are looking better and better

because of the yellow indicator light, which is why I of course own a post facelift one that I

don't really want with the white one. My four cars come to 13, 14, 16 at limos a bit expensive,

26, 36, 46 grand. So I've got I'm actually going to buy a fifth car when I'm over there

because I've got to have a K car. I want to have a K car that I can be pictured and people can

laugh at me. Chris Cooper. I thought it was a fantastic question. Really fantastic. Because

you thought about which which cars would I take over? If I drove past Naito Engineering,

they would sort of they might just nod a little a little nod of appreciation. And that the car

culture there would say you haven't brought nothing to our world of revering the car and not

putting salt on the red blah blah blah. So thinking about ridiculous restorations, I found

a fantastic Mark 1 Golf GTI, which has had an amazing amount of work done to it. It's in the

classifieds. I mean, we'll put the link up. I mean, it's extraordinary. I think that is that

just completely the wheels would do it alone for me. I so almost don't think Mark 1 Golf GTI

she should fiddle with the wheels. This one looks fantastic. Gotta have a convertible. And I just

think I never had one of these but I always coveted them. An M3 46. I know you need to look at the

rear subframe and all that kind of stuff. But at least if it took it to Japan, it would have a happy

rest of its life and it would sort of hopefully sort of quell all the decaying. I think this is a limo.

It is a BMW 750 Li. Nice. It's a long wheelbase saloon car and you know it.

It is. But it's got the l for limo in it. It's 12 and a half thousand miles in classified 26,000

clear glass that beautifully understated that beautifully understated alloy wheel that they had.

Oh, yes. Oh, bring back those wheels. And then the estate.

The estate you'd have, I think, would be an Audi RS6. Also.

If you add all that up, I think you get 70,000. If you believe that, you'll believe anything.

Right. I'm going to Japan this weekend. So I'm going all British because the Japanese love

they love everything and Paul Smith, Minis, everything. So we're going, we're going to just

flick through this. We're convertible is going to be a little MGB in red, starting around going to

the fish market, having a bit of sushi five in the morning, looking cool, smoking fags, all great.

Then my estate car is actually a four by four because I forgot that I needed a

state car and I've bought a four by four and I bought a brown. Brown is the new green, a brown

L322. Nice. It's POA. So that's like a quid. So we don't have to count that in the budget.

We're then obviously most ridiculous purchase is a Ford Fiesta XR2i for 22,000 pounds.

How cool would you look on Instagram and that bombing around in Tokyo? It's all about what

you look like in Tokyo. It doesn't matter if the car is shit. And then lastly, as we know,

take these cars out of the country, it's somewhere exotic. Your car suddenly becomes exotic.

It's a long wheelbase, Jaguar, Daimler, double six, the last of the V12 long wheelbase,

then whatever it's called the X305. I didn't even know they made that actually.

The X300 on you. Yeah, look at that with a V12 engine. You are going to be a member of something

particularly saucy and cool in Japan. And it's got lots of words about how amazing the car is,

which now obviously you can't read. But navy blue tan leather, you are a dude in Japan.

We've all knocked it out of the park there. Let's go to some music quickly.

I'll go first with Manish. Japan's second album was called obscure alternatives. Japan. Japan.

And it came out in 1978. The very last track on it is a musical piece. It was the first

musical piece that they composed, no singing at all. And it's called a tenant. And it is just

the most extraordinary evocative piece of music. And I imagine that in Japan.

Okay, there we go. Chris Cooper. Politics of dancing by reflex.

There you go. Good tune. Neil Clifford. The last cars that had tape decks were around

about the late 90s weren't they really? And one of my favorite albums of that period,

I know it's a bit earlier, was stars by Simply Red. I know it's a bit earlier,

but I always loved the first song on any album the most. Something got me started.

Yeah. I simply read. When I stuck that thing on,

didn't matter how many NBNA cards, credit cards that I had, all those letters that I never opened,

I was happy. I've been restoring a train with my learning friend Francis Bourgeois.

And obviously I'm getting into trains now because he's inevitable. He's infectious and they are

really just cars with bigger bits. We were talking about Chris Rear on here a while ago,

and obviously so sad that he passed away. But I had no idea that Chris Rear had written an album

that was named after a train. So his second studio album is called Deltax, named after the amazing

class 55s that have got the great Napier Deltax two-stroke engine. And the title track

for the album is called Deltax, and he sings about the East Coast Mainline, and he talks about

the romance of those particular trains. I had no idea that his second album was about that.

So go and listen to Deltax by Chris Rear. It's a really cool track actually,

and shows just how much he loved oily, reciprocating objects. Thank you so much for

coming and listening to us. I'm sorry I'm a bit tired today, but everyone's been very kind to

our birdie before their working day. So to Neil Clifford, Managed Partner, Chris Cooper,

and myself, enjoy the rest of your Friday and have a great weekend.

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