Unbothered |S:03E.65

Music

Free steel crack tire and bayou air crass The sun's head and creek side is fading fast

Are you really digging for peace Or is that just a lie tell to help you sleep

Sure that you hear y'all

I'm Jerry Wayne Longmarin y'all are presumably still y'all

All are welcome here in the Church of Internal Combustion

We just asked that you show up with an open heart

It's actually Wednesday for me

I'm recording I got shows in Gladewater, Texas this weekend

I'm going back up to the Piney Woods up to my little area where I'm from

And all manner of things are going to be tasked in the next few days

I'm not going to have time to sit down and do the podcast

Still haven't got the Cadillac sorted out but I'm working on it

Funny enough I had to rent a car on Touro for this trip because I decided to take the whole family with me

And the only car within my budget was the Cadillac XTC

So I'm renting a newer Cadillac to drive to East Texas

So let's just hope that goes well and the EBCM don't go out on that

So I'm 52 on the way there

I don't know much about the newer ones

We'll see

But we are going up there by the time you guys watch this I will already be on my way home

And hopefully it will be a successful weekend

I don't know, ticket sales aren't great

Which always stresses me out for the shows

So there's that to contend with

I'm hoping they get better by the time we get there and I got ads running

We'll just see but some of them are areas like that are hard places to market

So we'll see what happens

But I'm also going to go Friday and have lunch with my father and his wife

And Saturday the plan is

I've talked to my cousin Jimmy and got permission from him

Who now owns the property that the wrecking yard was on

Jimmy's also the one that found my mom's car in the woods and pulled it out for me

So the plan Saturday is meet my cousin Ricky's going to meet me over there in Lever's Chapel

And we're going to load up mom's Volkswagen

And Jimmy graciously allowed me to look around the shop and spend a few moments with the shop

And he's a good dude

You know we weren't really close growing up, he's quite a bit younger me

And I didn't see him a lot when we were younger

But man the past several years this dude is

Him and his wife are coming to the show Saturday night

I'm glad I put them on the guest list

Because this dude came and saw me performing Shreveport years ago

And it was messed up too because I hadn't seen him in a long time

Very little possum, huh, little possum not possum but a possum just run by

It was messed up man that night he come see me in Shreveport

He wasn't with the lady he's married to now

But that night he come see me in Shreveport

I was so excited, Uncle Bobby came that night too

Uncle Bobby and Aunt Lori and I think Granny came that night

And saw me performing Shreveport at the Funny Bone

At least I was there the whole week so they came to some of the shows

I was working with Steve McGrew

It's featuring for Steve McGrew

And funny enough that story kind of ties into the man I wanted to talk to y'all about today

Uncle Terry

But when Jimmy came to see me that night in Shreveport

Me and Rachel had not been together very long but we had just moved to a house in Oak Forest, Houston

And it's kind of a neighborhood had some problems

It's a lot better now but back then that neighborhood had some issues

And the house of course had burglar bars and all that kind of shit all over it

But Rachel had texted me while I was on stage

And when I got off stage she said she was scared

She thought somebody was messing around in the backyard or something

So you hear somebody in the backyard and we had heard somebody

We had caught somebody in our backyard one night before

And I had run them off

I have a history this is the funniest thing

So I have lots of guns

I'm pretty well trained with the use of firearms

You spend a lot more time shooting than I do now but I used to go all the time

But despite having those things at my person

And they're in safes and I got a biometric safe and everything that's for quick access

All that good stuff

Despite having those things around me I have a bad habit of chasing intruders away naked with hammers

It's happened at least three times

One time for sure an intruder

Another time for sure an intruder

And another time may not have been nothing

But all three of those times I have woken up, bolted out of bed with maybe nothing more than a pair of underwear

And because I was a contractor for so many years and I work on stuff at the house all the time

There's always a hammer nearby

And my first instinct is to always just grab the hammer and go chase something outside

And one night at that particular house

She had heard a noise in the middle of the night, she's very light sleeper, I'm a heavy sleeper

She heard a noise and I woke up and it sounded like somebody crunching around in our backyard in the leaves

And I bolted up out of bed and under the bridges

Grabbed a hammer out of the kitchen, set off in the backyard

And somebody run around inside the house, jumped over the fence, that was the end of it

Well it wasn't the end of it, we didn't sleep much that night, we were freaking out about that all night, it was a new neighborhood

Anyways, getting ahead of myself

She texts me, says hey I think somebody's in the backyard, I'm hearing somebody walking around back there

And I'm kind of freaked out because I'm here by myself

And her dad at the time was like in Huntsville or something, really good distance away

And so I called my buddy Steve, texted him and asked him if he'd go over there and check it out

And hang out him and reach for friends, wasn't a problem, you know what I mean?

Like watch movies, bullshit

But in the meantime she wanted me to stay on the phone with her because she was really freaking out

And Jimmy and his friend had come and seen my show

And I didn't get to really talk to him after the show because I was on the phone with her and she was rightfully so freaking out

About maybe somebody, an intruder being in our yard

And I always hated that he ended up having to leave and I didn't get a chance to think of him coming out and hanging out and everything

He was just a good dude

But funny enough, that same Shreveport trip

I went fishing with my cousin Justin who was Terry's son

And that's one of my favorite fishing trips I've ever been on

We just had a little talk about it more

Anyway, so we're getting ready to go to Gladewater

We got moms in there packing the kids up

I cleaned the bathroom because there's nothing more

That shows you how old I've gotten is my favorite thing

Is cleaning the bathroom right before we go out of town

So come home, the bathroom is sparkling, it's perfect

And go in there and take that first back home dump

And it's a good time, it's just what you need to welcome you back into your home

That's how old I am now

And I've been getting stuff ready

I had to of course finish writing this episode

And I went ahead and wrote next week's episode or parts of it

Because one of the things we're going to do is

You know, if everything works out, we get to go out there and get the car

We're going to do quite a bit of filming out there

And I'm going to do some narrating for you guys

So next week's episode is going to be kind of a special episode

Where I'm going to take y'all to the wrecking yard

You know, and you know what's left of it

So I think, and we're going to get what's left of mom's car

And then I've wretched out to Mikey Brown

And me and him are going to brainstorm and figure out what to do with that car

So I'm really excited about that

Also, full of some trepidation

And it's the same trepidation I always get about going home

I just, I don't feel like I belong there anymore

I do like going and I like seeing everybody

But I always feel this little sense of unease that my time there is over

And it's not, you know, that's when they tell you you can't go home

But you can't because it's not the same, it's not the same place

It's not, nothing, some things are the same

You can go eat you a char burger, but Charlene ain't there

You know what I mean?

You can, I can go look at that shop all I want

But you know who ain't, Papa ain't there, my dad ain't there

And I'm going to see my dad, which I'm excited about that

But we just, our relationship is full of work

And I don't even know any other way to describe it

We just, we're always, we're just not quite there yet

I'm also sort of studying, I'm getting up Sunday morning

And going and sitting in a service at the First United Pentecostal Church

Just to see the inside of that building one more time

I don't know, say goodbyes to some things, that's what I'm going to do this weekend

Is I'm going to say some good, say some goodbyes to things

Because I don't think I'll be going there again for a while

We'll see

I

I want to get too deep into it, but

Uncle Bobby's daughter is in the hospital, Shani

And it's not, it's looking pretty grim

So

It's just not a good situation

But I think that might be the last straw for me as far as, I mean sometimes I just think that old woman cursed us all

I don't know, it doesn't matter

But I do sometimes think that

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Uncle Terry

It's my dad's youngest brother

And my dad's almost a baby, so it's a

If I had to line it out for you, it goes, I believe

It was Stanley

Larry, Gary

Linda

Then Jerry and Terry

A lot of airy names there

His name was Terry Lee

Terry Lee

And that's how they called him, Terry Lee

Terry Lee

Jerry Wayne

Terry Lee

They never called Larry by his middle name

I couldn't even tell you what Larry's middle name is

And Gary, I think was Gary Jean

They called him Gary Jean every once in a while

But

Of course, Stanley's middle name was James

That's what Stanley wanted to be called, James

I should have just called him Uncle James

When I was real small

I don't know how much younger Uncle Terry is than my dad

I think maybe it's just three or four years

It's not much

I heard stories about him all my life

My dad used to tell me that every time

Me, mom and papa all left to go to a girls' store

Go run errands

And Linda would beat the shit out of him and Terry both

And I, you know what

That doesn't even surprise me

They all grew up in a war-like chaotic household

Tell me lots of stories

But Terry Lee was the baby and he got away with more shit

Around Papa Longmire

Papa Longmire seemed a little softened towards Terry Lee

And Terry Lee could get the old man's goat and mess with him

And my dad always sort of envied the way Terry could get them in and out of shit

When they was growing up

He used to tell me a story about one time him

And Uncle Terry and Aunt Linda

And I think two of the neighbor boys decided to play war in the cornfield

And ruined the section of this old dude's cornfield

And he came over and got Papa Longmire involved

And some butts got whooped

And shit went down

Because they ripped a whole mess of cornfield

And he said Terry was the only one that didn't get his butt whooped over that

Because he'd come up with some reason why he didn't know it was a cornfield

Sounds ridiculous

When I was a kid, him and Aunt Robbie was already married

And they had a...

They lived in the neighborhood

So my mom and papa all lived right on Highway 31

Right when we were going through Kilroy, Texas

And they lived pretty close to Frisk Watson Road where the church was

And right behind their house there was a little neighborhood back there

And there was King's Highway and Bill Street

And there was one of these streets back there

It was called Tidewater Street

When I was a little kid, Uncle Terry and Aunt Robbie lived in this big old...

It seemed huge to me when I was a kid

It probably wasn't that big

But very, very old house that was built on that street

I remember they had a pool table

In their dining room

Because Uncle Terry had seen the hustler

And he decided he was going to be a pool player

And they had this big old mean cat that just hated my guts

That's mostly what I remember about that house

Is that cat just jacking me up every opportunity it got

That cat hated my guts

And sure enough I was asked my dad about it

I was talking to him the other day and I brought this up

And I said, man, do you remember them having some big old...

Because that big old mean gray cat

I was like, yep, okay, I didn't imagine that

That's something that he hated everybody except for them

But you know, when my parents got married

Uncle Terry still lived at home

Be my own papa

And...

Well, my uncle Terry's about the only person my papa would praise

He'd just tell you, boy, Terry Lee...

I'll tell you what, Terry Lee never raced a motor

Never raced a motor

That boy worked on cars, never raced a motor

That's papa's big unforgivable sin

Go out there and race that motor out in driveway

Boy, Terry Lee, he never raced a motor

But one story I did hear about him was around that time period

Right before mom and daddy got together

Uncle Terry had him a 1965 Mustang

A little white Ford Mustang

I believe it was

I think he had a date with Aunt Robbie

And he had decided to change oil in his car before he went on this date

And he hadn't had the car very long

He pulled it up the driveway and he got the pan

He got up under there and he took the drain plug out

Drain the oil

And my daddy said he was working on something else

Doing something else

Terry came over and said, man, I think there's something wrong with my car

So I'm supposed to take five or six quarts of oil

But I've already put eight quarts of oil in it

And it still ain't even showing on the dipstick

Dad went over there and checked the dipstick

Yeah, I don't know

Dad said they were standing there for a minute

He looked down and he noticed the oil was leaking out behind the front tire

Running out on the driveway

He said, Terry, did you put the drain plug back in it?

And he said, Terry, he said, yeah, of course I put the drain plug back in it

And then he just kind of poked him and pointed that oil leaking out behind the tire

And Terry said, oh, shit, I forgot to put the drain plug in it

Jump back over there

And he had to import all his new oil down through the motor

And then overflowed the pan that I was using to drain the old oil

And my dad said, pap, oh, oh, Mark, come on

Glued about all that oil on his driveway

Which was funny because it was just an old tar driveway to begin with

But apparently the old man had just lost his mind about it

My uncle Terry is the biggest of the Longmire clan

My dad was tall, my dad was 6'2", 6'3", Uncle Terry could look down at him

I don't know how tall Uncle Terry was

But I suspect in his prime, probably 6'4", 6'5".

He's taller than Uncle Gary, way taller than Uncle Larry

And taller than Stanley, taller than Papa when he got this full height

Papa was pretty tall, he was over 6' but Uncle Terry was big, big

And I seen pictures of him when he was young, he liked power lifting

He was strong as an ox

My favorite thing about Uncle Terry was he's the only other one in the family

Had blonde hair and blue eyes, like I did, you know

I've later since found out that my great-grandfather on that side

His name was John Thomas, he had blonde hair and blue eyes

And my papa didn't get it, but somehow I got it

Uncle Terry got it

What I mostly remember about Uncle Terry was he was just always really kind

I liked, as a kid I liked talking to him, he was always interested in talking to you

He was always interested in what you were doing in school, what was going on

When I first started getting cars and stuff, he was interested in that

He was just, he was good

And when my dad and the brothers would sit around and tell the stories

Uncle Terry didn't tell me stories, but he sure cut up and laughed at the rest of them

He had something happen to him, I can't remember what it's called

I think it's called Gin Bears Disease

But it was some crap that happened to him, I think when he was around 20

And it basically paralyzed him, what was going on

And it took him a while to recover from it

And I don't think he ever got quite back to the weightlifting

When I was growing up small, he was a big man, like heavy, weight-wise, he was just a big old man

And beautiful musician, incredible musician

My dad was a trombone player, my dad was a pretty good musician

But Uncle Terry could play just about anything

If he had strings on it, Uncle Terry could play it, and he could play it well

But what he mostly did in the church was he played banjo with the church band

And I just have a special affinity for banjo players

Not that I know anything about it, I don't know anything about music other than I love it and I enjoy it

But to me, the banjo just looks so much more complicated than a guitar, it just looks harder

And I like him sounds it makes, maybe that's a little bit of deliverance I got in me

Maybe that's just watching Uncle Terry sit up there at the church and play that banjo

Got you, got you, watch Uncle Terry play that banjo for the church

He taught the Sunday school class I was in when I was 7

Right about the time when we moved to Houston, I was in him

Him and Meemaw taught the Sunday school class for that age group

Meemaw had been teaching that age group for a real long time and Uncle Terry had come on to help her

You know, even in that community, we were still like, we lived out in the sticks

You know, we didn't live in city, in town, we didn't have nice cars and nice things

I had two friends in that class, one of them's name was J.D. Payne, J.D. Hain

And the other one's name was Mark Ferris and I'm still friends with Mark Ferris to this day

We've reconnected over the years, but they were just a little bit older me, a couple years older me

They showed me my first naked woman, I remember that

They had it right behind the church, there was a softball field

And behind that softball field was this little outbuilding that had fallen apart out there in the woods

And they had found a stash of nudie mags, hustlers and stuff like that

And they had stashed them out there in that building and they took me out there to see them one time

And I remember the first time I saw lady parts that scared the shit out of me

Because I didn't know what the hell was going on down there

But probably far too young to be seeing that sort of thing

But I was just worried something bad had happened there

Because I only knew what I had at that point and it didn't look like that

Pentecostals, not real big on sex education and such, they just tell you not to have any until you get married

And then figure it out on your own, good luck, no roadmap

But they were in that class with me and they kind of picked on me a little bit

And it's just the nature, I don't hold them any animosity, it's just the nature of the thing

I was small, I was pretty weak compared to them, they were both physically stronger than me

They were both a little bigger than me and they lived in town

Mark and his family, they had a nice house and nice cars

His dad did pretty well selling insurance and JD's dad was the assistant pastor at the church

And they did all right, they had a nice car, stuff like JD had go-karts and all kind of crap like that

JD broke his leg riding go-karts around the church, run up under somebody's car or something

I can't remember what happened, but when I first met JD he had a broke leg

But I remember they was picking on me in that class one day

Telling everybody I had picked my nose and I probably had, I was a booger picker

I was just a little dork, I was the dorkiest dork that ever dorked

I was just the dorkiest kid, I spent all my time in books and the rest of my time wandering around with my dog in the wrecking yard

I was just a little dork, I didn't have a lot of friends, I didn't have good social skills

I was pretty shy and they was just picking at me about this and making fun of me

And I remember Uncle Terry just kind of stood up out of his chair and went over there and looked at him

He goes, you gonna try to look me in the face and tell me you two boys never picked your nose before?

And they both like, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, so what's so different about you picking your nose and him picking his?

And I remember being glad he was defending me, but also like can we stop talking about me picking my nose

And he said, everybody in this room has picked their nose before and I don't know, he just kind of dressed them down a little bit

He's like, is this the kind of thing you want to be doing in church?

Is picking on somebody else and making fun of them?

Is that the kind of message you want to send the Lord?

Straighten them boys, you know what I mean, got them off my back a little bit and it's a silly little memory to remember about somebody

My Aunt Robbie has taught or I think she's retired now, but she taught special ed my entire life

And my Aunt Robbie is just one of the kindest women that I know

I'm hoping we get to see her while we're up there

She devoted her life to special education and teaching students with disabilities

And now her daughter, their youngest Julie is doing the same thing

And I love the way they talk to my son, my son Noah, because they understand him

And he vibes with him right off the bat and I can just, I just so appreciate that out of them

It's rare you meet people that really know how to vibe with somebody who's different and they're just so good at it

But Aunt Robbie was kind of like that for me when I was growing up

She was always so kind to me about stuff like that

I feel bad about this, her son Justin is younger than me

And there was a period of time I remember when we were little that I kind of bullied him

And I don't want to make justifications excuses for it, it was mean

I was bullying him because he was smaller than me and I could

And I think I probably learned the behavior from people that was bullying me

And it went away very quickly, but I just remember her kind of laughing about my mom

Like oh this is just something they got to go through

Jerry Wayne's not mean, he's not mean spirited

I don't remember what happened, I remember I was climbed up in a tree and I was shooting him with a water gun

And every time he got close to me I would hose him down with that water gun

And he was getting really upset and there was, over the years me and him

Maintained some level of closeness and stuff as we grown up

And I'm glad because he's about six foot five and probably a good 320 pounds

And could bend me over like a damn lawn chair if he wanted me to

And probably pick me up and throw me in a dumpster

He's a big old stout boy

Two of my younger cousins, him and Dominic, both six foot five

Monsters of men that used to be fun to what they got of age

Go to the bar and take them to the bar with me though because they both like black leather jackets

Look like I had these two goons with me

And I ain't gonna lie, I got a little mouthy

You know, Brutus and Cleetus behind me

Even though I'm not sure either one of them really knew how to fight

But they were just so ominous people left us to be

And I took advantage of that some, sure, sure I did

Van Robbie was always still kind to me, she always was

And she said, she was there for me at a time

She, it's not even, it's not even a big thing

But at the time it was everything in the world

I mean, my family's very, very religious

And all the people in that little town that we grew up with

In our church community, everything also very, very religious

So when somebody dies, what do they say?

She's in a better place

She's not in pain now

She's off with the Lord, she's in a better place

And I know they mean well with it

I know the intentions are well-meaning

That's what makes it so hard

Because the people were saying that to me at my mom's funeral

And they were just, it was like a line check

Of people coming up that couldn't wait to tell me that

She's in a better place now, Jerry Wayne

And every time they said it, it would break my heart

Because all I could think was what better place is there than with us

There's no better place than with us

That was the better place

And while I am somewhat a person of faith

And somebody who does show some concern for my soul

I'm not a big believer in heaven and hell

I won't go too far into that

But I just, not a big believer in those things

I remember all those people were coming up to me

And we're saying that

And when Aunt Robbie came up, she just hugged me

And she said, I am so sorry y'all are going through this

I love y'all so much

And it just meant everything in the world

And I whispered in her ear, I was like

Oh, I feel like if one more person tells me she's in a better place

I'm going to lose my mind

She hugged me tighter and she said, kiddo

If you have to punch somebody, I got your back

And of course I wouldn't go to hit anybody at a funeral or anything like that

Or some poor stranger saying a nicety

But it was just knowing, I don't know

It was just knowing who she was and that she was there for me in that moment

And sometimes moments aren't big

The thing I really think about the older I get

Is some of the most important moments in my life

Some of the things I really dwell on and think about

When my mind is free to wonder are the very small moments

So it was a small moment, it wasn't a big moment

It took seconds, but she had my back

I knew she had my back and it made me feel better

Uncle Terry sticking up for me with them boys

Not a big moment

But an important small little

I think our life is made up of these little tiny little molecules of moments

And I think when you really think back to your life

And you look at the things that are important to you and the things that shaped you

You're going to find that a lot of those small moments did a lot more of that sanding on you

To make you who you are today than the big moments

The big moments sure, they make changes to your personality

Your psyche, your wiring, the way you look at things, your perspective

Of course they do

But I bet if you could somehow do an analysis

You would find out that the small moments did far more to shape who you become

I was talking to my buddy Adam

Adam that's working with me on the book, my editor

And telling him about a small moment

Meeting a Holy Ghost preacher in a tire shop one time

And having a conversation with his dude

And how he told me I had an anointing

That it was my job to make people happy and bring joy

And just a complete stranger and he prayed with me

Anyways, I think it's those little moments

That's a very important little moment to me

Even after when we moved to Houston

Some of the family would visit from time to time

But Uncle Terry and Aunt Robbie came all the time

Now they're youngest, Julie

She had problems with diabetes and stuff when she was young

And she had to come down to the hospital here in Houston

So they could put like a pump on her that pumped insulin for and everything

She had whatever the real scary diabetes is

I don't know a lot about it

So we had seen them a lot

Because they had been down dealing with that

But they would come and visit us quite often

And it was always a good time

My mom would always plan a host

We'd go to Astor World

A lot of times we went down to Brazos Bend and went fishing

Because Uncle Terry loved fish

And Dad liked fish and we'd go down to Brazos Bend

We didn't have no boat or nothing

We'd just go find us a little quiet place out there on Elm Lake or somewhere

In the state park

And we'd have a little mom and Aunt Robbie

We'd make a big old picnic and we'd hang out

Fish and not catch a whole lot of nothing

But we'd have a good time

Uncle Terry like I'm not his kid

I'm sure he raised his voice at times

But even when he was hot

He didn't really like

He would get a little bass in his voice

He kind of had a more nasally voice than me

They kind of talk out of the back of his nose a little bit

And he'd lean his head back like that

I can't quite do it

But I love talking with Uncle Terry

And Uncle Terry was into computers

Before anybody was

Uncle Terry read CAD machines and stuff

And he was really smart

He knew a lot about automation

He was like the first guy

Him and Uncle Bobby were the first guys that were building computers

For themselves

And

They had two kids

They had Justin, Julie

And they'd come down

We'd have a good time

We'd go fishing

All kind of stuff

Lug cool around

All over Brad's been state park

Fish and

My dad would of course be irritable

And pissed off about something for the end of the day

And Uncle Terry would just always kind of laugh

My dad could get angry as shit

And Uncle Terry would just kind of laugh at him

And just completely unbothered

By everybody else's

And I think Uncle Terry maybe just dealt with

Like I know he had a temper

There ain't no son of John Longmires

Didn't have some kind of temper

But he didn't really put it on display

He could always keep his in check for the most part

He wasn't like

My dad and the rest of his brothers

I seen Uncle Terry lose his flip shit

And come on my Uncle Gary flip shit

And come on glue

I seen my Uncle Stanley

I mean my Uncle Larry tear off across the yard

At his son Dwayne

Like he's ready to throw a car at him

I've seen you know

Y'all have heard stories about my old man

Never seen any of this out of my Uncle Terry

And I've seen him lose his cool couple of times

Working on something but

He was a pretty good mechanic

Anything with his hands

Man was just good at music

Can't it didn't matter

But he

So like my dad got into computers

My dad didn't like video games

My Uncle Terry liked video games

And he would talk to me about video games

And when we would go hang out at their house

Or spend the night at their house

He had a Commodore 64

And he had some games on it

And he had let me and Justin play on the Commodore 64

And he also

My Uncle Terry loved stand up comedy

And so they got the cable channels at their house

And we would go sit on the bed in their room

And we would watch

I think it was Caroline's Comedy Hour

And that's like

That's where I saw like John Panette

That's where I learned John Panette's routine

From when I was a kid

And you know

Back then

Tim Allen

Was still doing stand up

You'd see Tim Allen on there

And you'd see Miss Cheryl on there

It was just fascinating

It was fascinating to me

I used to watch Paula Poundstone a lot

It was fascinating to me

Never in those days

Did Don on me that was going to be something I wanted to do

But I sure loved watching it

Jeff Dunham and Peanut

Back in the day

In the old days

For Jeff to become whatever Jeff is now

But back then

The first time I saw Peanut

I thought that was the funniest shit I've ever seen in my life

And Uncle Terry used to do the peanut

Hey Bruno, you're going to like this one

It's simple

Like Uncle Terry would make all the jokes

He'd do all the routines

He liked it when I did the John Panette thing

He liked John Panette

Uncle Terry was a big big man

I seen him eat a whole package of Oreos

And one sitting one time

So fast

It was just a big dude

Man

And fish and fool

That man knew everything

Like as good as my Papa Longmire was

A fisherman I don't think

He ever held a candle to Uncle Terry

Uncle Terry studied fish

He could tell you about where they slept

How they ate, what their patterns were

He studied fish

And man catch fish

Anyway we're going to Gladewater

He used to love fish like Gladewater

He was just great to be around when I was a kid

I was always happy to be around it

I was always happy to be around Aunt Robbie

She was fun, I loved spending the night at their house

And hanging out with them

It was always a good time

We were always going to have a good time

They had a Honda Odyssey

Uncle Terry had found this old used

Honda Odyssey

I don't know if you remember that

If some of you are overseas you might not know what that is

But Honda back then made this thing

It was kind of like a big go cart

With Doom Buggy tires on it

And it was called a Honda Odyssey

It had a little 8-10 horse engine on it

And they had Uncle Terry

Had found one of them used and fixed it up

Got it running

Well me and Justin would drive at Honda Odyssey

All over their property

They had a little piece of land out in Liberty City

By that time

We just had a good old time

When I first started driving

Aunt Robbie was one of the first ones

To throw me her keys

Some of y'all heard me do the joke

On stage about

Sitting in a Nissan Center too fast

She had a Nissan Center

With a five speed in it

And she knew I knew how to drive standard

But I wasn't real good at it yet

And she let me take

Julie and Justin

My sister down to the snow cone stand

Get her by snow cones

And I parked on a hill and I had never done that

In a standard transmission before

So we got in the car every time I tried to back up the hill

The car died and of course Julie was little

She started crying and wailing

And then

I started freaking out

About what to do and I finally just

Jammed it in reverse and floored it

And dumped the clutch and probably just about

Ripped all the engine mounts out of that poor little

Nissan Center to get it back up that hill

And turned around and

About the time we got back

To the house of course Julie is telling her

Version of the events in which I almost killed them

And Kimberly's like

Yeah it was pretty scary and Justin's talking about it

And I'm trying to explain what happened

I'm Mary Ant Robbie just came over to me

She goes hey I've had that happen

To be before

Next time it happens pull your emergency brake up

Get the car, push the clutch in

Get the car in gear, start easing out in the clutch

And let down your emergency brake

At the same time and it'll help you back out of that

Or get out of that spot or off the hill

And

Like everybody else was like give me grief

But Robbie just came over and told me how not to do it

Next time like it was so nice and she was just

Well I was an idiot teenager

She was used to dealing with kids with

Disabilities so I probably fit the mold

At the time

She's a good lady

Still is, still a wonderful lady

I have another little moment

With Uncle Terry that I think about often

Is

When I was young and I was living up there

I was running around with Bobby

And I had that old trans

Am

I'd gone out to Liberty City

For something and

I wasn't making much

Money then I didn't have a whole lot of money

In my pocket and

Wasn't even sure I had enough gas to get back home

And

I drove by their house

Uncle Terry always drove this little Chevrolet Blazer

For a long time

GMC version of the S15

Type thing

And I saw it there and it ain't Robbie's car there

So I pulled in and

He was sitting on the porch

In the porch swing

And he of course

Gave me all the greetings and we talked a little bit

And he was like, how's your

Daddy said you're looking for a job

I was like, yeah, he found one yet

But I'm going to do some interviews this week

And stuff and I remember he just

Without even thinking about it

He goes, well, I know I've been there

And he pulled his wallet out and he gave me $20

He goes, why don't you

Take some money to help you out

Gas and stuff

And he just gave me that 20 bucks

Just kindness

Just hey

See if anybody can help you out

Get a 20

And back in them days

The $20 went a long way

$20 bought gas

And food

And did a lot

Back in those days

Him and Robbie had left the church

And I don't know all the details

And that but

The church hadn't treated them kindly

And they left the church

And they never went back

And

But still just good

Just

Some people are just good

You know

The funniest thing about it

Is I really think

My Uncle Terry was my dad's best friend

My dad just

He just didn't have a lot of friends

But him and Terry grew up together

They were probably the closest

Out of all of them

My dad and Terry were tight

They were thick as thieves

And they both knew computers

They both could have the most boring

Conversations in the world

Uncle Terry just didn't get

He was talking about the things he liked talking about

And that was just kind of the end of it

People would bring up politics

All that kind of stuff

He just stayed out of it

He didn't feel the need to

Override somebody else's opinion

Or anything like that

He was just

But he

I really think he was my dad's

Real best friend

I really think that's the case

I think my dad had him

And my dad was real close to my Uncle Stanley

And

He lost Uncle Stanley

And him and Terry got tighter

I always think about that

Often like

My father

Like I wonder

About the damage that has been done

To his psyche

Having to lose Uncle Stanley

And then very

Shortly after Uncle Stanley died

Uncle Terry died

My dad's youngest brother

I remember it because

It was another night

I was working at the laugh stop

And

It's the other time

My cousin Amy came and told me somebody died

After a show, you know

It was

I think it's the one time

I think that is the time Amy came and told me

I think with Uncle Stanley I got a call

But

Amy and her boyfriend at the time

Had come to the comedy show

They were living in Houston

And

They had come see me at the comedy show

And after the show

She said I didn't want to tell you before the show

But

Uncle Terry died this morning

And he had a massive heart attack

They say what it really

He had like fallen down

And ruptured something inside of him

And he didn't think it was a big deal

So he didn't go to the doctor

And then it turned into a big deal

And then the stress of that

Ended up causing

I think he perforated his colon

Or something when he fell

And the stress

Of all that on his body caused a heart attack

And we lost him

And I remember then

Just like being worried about my dad

Because I knew Uncle Terry was my dad's best friend

And it was so soon after Uncle Stanley had died

And

That's the craziest thing

Like

I remember me and Amy talking about this

Like

But now even more so I think

Our dads were robbed of their brothers

But not by war

Just time

Two of five went to Vietnam

And came back

Like that

Was a super common

Two brothers go off to Vietnam and come back

But Uncle Larry

And Uncle Gary went off to Vietnam

And come back unscathed

I may not unscathed

But whole

As far as physically

But since that

My dad has had to bury every one of his brothers

He had four brothers

He's had to bury all four of them

And that's a perspective

I reckon only a man who is buried

Of his brothers

Can understand

I cannot imagine

It has to be one of the loneliest feelings

There is

I mean to just

And he's not even the youngest

You know

But he has had

To stand

At a gravesite and say goodbye to all four of his brothers

I've been a pallbearer for every one of them

And

Now it's just him and his sister

You know and she's

My inland is not in good health

She's

She actually just had a fall a while back

Broke something in her neck

And she's not doing good

But I can't imagine

What that's like

I can't begin to fathom

I have the one person

That I call my brother

And Joey is my brother

But

I'm terrified

Of that phone call

I don't want to live in a world

Where Joey doesn't exist

So I hope I go before he does

So he has to deal with it

Because himself is like that

That's all right

I'm owning it

I just want to

I hadn't talked about him a lot

And I thought about that

I was thinking about that day

With the Sunday school

And I was thinking about him

Telling me when I was learning to drive

That don't hit your brakes in a curve

Make your brake pads wear out faster

I just was remembering

All these little kindnesses

He paid me over the years

The many, many kindnesses

My Aunt Robbie has shown me

And they were just

Fantastic people

Just living

Their lives

My cousin Justin grew up

Married a real sweet lady named Valerie

And he has a good life with her

My cousin Julie's got

A lot of good things going for her

I think maybe a couple kids

Y'all did it, y'all pulled it off

Y'all did the thing

Kids grew up, they kind of got their lives together

You did it

Justin's about as good a human being

As you'd ever want to know

I feel bad

During the pandemic, Justin

I was doing a lot of leather work

And Justin sent me a knife

Somebody made him

He wanted me to make him a knife case for it

And I started making the case for it

And then the truck astrology stuff blew up

And all of a sudden I was busy

Doing gigs again

And all kind of stuff

And I couldn't do all my leather work

And I ended up just having to send him his knife back

I never got to finish that leather case for him

But I still got the pieces of it

Over in my leather box

So maybe one of these days I

Find something that

Looks similar to that knife and finish that case

For him and send it to him

I hot to

Let's wrap it up there

Well, this ain't going to be a real

Long one this week, we're going to do some testimonials

And

I'm going to address something

And it's

I don't want anybody

No, we'll get to it

We'll get to it

Let's do some testimonials

This is from last week's episode

Oh, our old buddy

Jacob Altrade's Master of Fun

I wish I could clip the last paragraph

Starting around five minutes

I couldn't agree more

No one has the same beliefs as me and that's okay

Yeah, it's just

You don't have to

And I'm going to talk a little bit about that

Because it's something somebody said in the comments

But you don't

I don't know when we became this

Everybody's got to believe the same as me

If they don't dehumanize them

I don't know

When that crept in

But it's frightening

It's not the world I grew up in

And even back then

We had all kind of other stuff going on

But it wasn't like that

My uncles

I remember when they would argue about politics

They didn't agree on nothing

They'd all argue and talk shit

And that'd be the end of it

Nobody was

Saying I don't want to live

In a country with these other people

And stuff like that

And that's the part that bothers me

You know

I think we've strayed a long way from

The seed of what this whole experiment was supposed to be

About Jake, I'm with you

And it's okay with me too

I

You know

The next testimony

There's

Matt Blue-eyed Viking

He said, I know you don't normally get political J.W.

But now is the time

Trust me, no one on the left watches you

It's a different day in time

They hate us

And I couldn't

I talked to you in the comments

I couldn't discredit you more

But I kept thinking about it

Because I had somebody else say something

Along those lines to me

And it really bothers me

Because

I'm not getting that

From anybody else

It's just

Few people that are doing that

And to me that feels

It feels like a threat

It feels

Not a threat, but like you're pushing something at me

And I don't enjoy that

And that kind of stuff

Happens to all of us

But when you say trust me

No one on the left watches you

The fact that you tried to sell me on it

Tells me you haven't really been listening to me at all

When you live in a vacuum

You start thinking the vacuum is the whole world

That's why I keep friends

Of different stripes

So I'm not breathing the same hot air all day

I talked to folks across the spectrum

Every single week

My neighbor's the most mad guy you've ever met in your life

I love that guy, he's a good dude

I don't think he's a harmful person

One of my best friends

Is as far left as you'd probably get

I don't agree with all his stuff

I don't even agree with a lot of it

But I know he's a good hearted person

That looks out for people in his life

That's why I tell you I judge people by their actions

I talk to folks across the spectrum

Every single week, not hypotheticals

But real people

I see the zip codes on the ticket sales

The addresses on the merch orders

The emails that start

Well, you probably won't agree with me

But I love the show

And it comes from all kinds of

From barbecue joints to vegan taco trucks

To union halls, deer blinds

Many bands and lifted trucks

It comes from all kinds of places

And what they all share is simple

They needed to laugh

They found their way here

Or they found their way to my show

Or they found their way to my content

I know an actual physicist

An astrophysicist in North Carolina

That watches my content

Politics is theater

And it's not even the good kind

It's kind of the fog machine

And paper crowns where the actors forget their lines

And blame it on the audience

If you want to buy into the play, that's your choice

But I'm not wasting my daylight on it

I'd rather spend my time on stories

Family

And getting a room full of strangers

To breathe in time together

You believe whatever fairy tales you want

I still love you

But don't come in here trying to tell me

Who hates me and who doesn't watch

I keep a close eye on my analytics

I know who buys tickets

Who buys shirts

Who shows up

Who listens to the podcast

On their drive to work

It's almost like this is my fucking job or something

I feel like somebody is selling you hate wholesale

And you're buying it up like toilet paper

In the pandemic

You remember how that went?

Folks had mountains of shaman and no food

That's what this is

It's full up on panic paper and starving for perspective

So let's be clear

You don't know my audience, I do

You don't see my inbox, I do

You don't read the room, I live in it

If your story tells you whole groups of people

Don't watch, that story is lying to you

And probably lying to you for profit

Step outside in the bubble

Breathe some fresh air and laugh with the rest of us

Because the people you think aren't here

They're already here laughing louder than you

And the only one missing out

Because of those feelings is you

You know

There are groups of people

Trying to make life difficult for us all

And I believe they're friends groups

All across the spectrum

That are doing things

To try to make everybody's life difficult

And I think when you feed into all that bullshit

And play the game, then you just make them stronger

And maybe I'll find out I'm wrong one day

Maybe I will

But you know what, I'd rather be wrong believing in the good of people

Than be right believing the worst

Hope you guys tune in next week

I'm excited about it

Please do me a favor, like and subscribe

If you enjoy listening to the podcast

All that helps my analytics

Hope your week's going well for you

Hope things are going better in your life

Hope maybe some of the

Some of the gnarliness of the outside world

Is calming down, I'd like to believe it is

I hope I can get enough people

In those rooms this weekend

That we can just have some good shows

And I can work some more on the special

I hope everything goes well with the Volkswagen

I'll be sure to let you guys know

When I'm in the chat

And I'm hoping I have

A bunch of cool video to show you next week

With some voiceover work and such like that

And

I'm beyond excited

About everything we're trying to do this weekend

Like I said, also very trepidatious

Also trepidatious

About that Cadillac I rented

Might be bad optics to be seen in the Cadillac right now

But whatever, it is what it is

Don't trust mama's car to get us there

And back without having some kind of issue

Right now and I can't get the damn thing

Registered so I'm trying to get all that

I can't get it inspected

To get the registration current

That's out so

I don't want to

Risk any problems on the trip

We got a lot of plans, a lot of moving

Parts we're trying to make happen

I'm hoping I get to visit with all my family

I want to visit, I know a bunch of them are coming

On Saturday night show so I'm looking forward to that

Seeing the cousin

Julie and

Cousin Shane

And

All them and having a little fellowship with them

I did

Find out that

The theater where I'm doing the shows

Used to be

A porn theater back in the 70s

For a short period of time and it's where they

First showed the Debbie does Dallas video

So

I've decided to wait

And let the Pentecostals know that

After the show

Because maybe I'll just bring it up

At the show, that'd be kind of funny

But I decided to do my crazy thing

Where I'm doing the wrecking yard

I'm not taking an opener, I'm just going to have

Jackson the owner of the theater

He's an entertaining cat

If you haven't seen the podcast I did with him

You should go check it out

And I'll put a link to that

But he's a crazy cat

And

I'm just going to have him bring me on stage

I'm going to do what I did in Chicago

I'm going to do that special combination

Of the wrecking yard and the tipping point

And

Because those folks are just

Pretty much buying tickets to me anyways

I just want to give them more of that

I want to give them a good night

Hopefully we'll sell a bunch of stickers

And come home with a little money in my pocket

We'll see

Thank you

The word that kept coming to my mind

When I kept thinking about Uncle Terry was unbothered

I kept thinking about that

It kept striking a chord in me

I was trying to figure something out about it

Like

My Uncle Terry

Was an unbothered man

At least from the outside looking in

Everyone

John Lomar's sons had a temper

It just showed itself different

Some of them flashed hot like lightning like my daddy

So I smoldered

Held it tight until it burned a hole

Clean through an engine block

But Uncle Terry just let most of it pass

I'm sure he raised his voice

From time to time

Any man will if you live long enough in this world

But most of the time

He wore the look of somebody who had already

Decided he wasn't going to let this thing

Or whatever this thing was

Take up any more space in his soul

Than it deserved

That's rare

I feel like most of us wake up bothered

I do

Bothered by the news

Bothered by bills

Bothered by who said what about who

The whole world stands on a street corner waving its arms

Trying to drag us into a fight

That don't even belong to us

Politics

Gossip

Arguments with strangers on the internet

All of it is bait, most days we take it

But Uncle Terry didn't

He talked about

The things he liked

Computers, comedy, music,

Fishing

And he didn't need you to like them back

To fill his own joy

He didn't measure the worth

Of his interests

Against the crowd

He didn't need

Agreement to keep his peace

I think

That's something worth aiming at

To be able to walk through this life

Without carrying every grievance home

Like a sack of wet laundry

To be able to just enjoy the things

That light you up without waiting

For someone else to clap for you

To choose joy and keep it

To stay unbothered in the middle

Of all this noise

And if I take anything from Uncle Terry

Into my own days, it's this

We'll learn the difference

Between what deserves my fire

And what deserves my silence

We'll spend less time

Clenched up in battles that don't matter

And more time unbothered

The way he was

Content, steady

Still finding reasons to smile

And that's the spirit

That I want here in the Wrecking Yard

Everybody's welcome here

But if you show up peddling

Discord and falsehoods

We're going to point you to the door

And tell you to drop that nonsense off in the gutter

Where it belongs

Don't mistake

My kindness for weakness

Or take it for granted

I've bounced off roofs, I've been beaten early to death

I've been cut on, I've been run over

I've been counted out and every single time

I got back up swinging

Don't let people put you in that position

I'm rooting for y'all

I tell you that every week and I'm meaning 100%

Even when we disagree

I mean

I'm rooting for you

Every single one of you

That listens to this, comes here to share

I'm rooting for you

You

See you guys next week

Hopefully I have some cool footage of

Volkswagen for you

I'm J.W.

And I love you

The sun's in the creek side

Are you really digging

for peace

Or is that just a lie

You tell to help you sleep

You're sure that you really want to know

We'll be hiding all the stories

they told

You

Can't live this divided

There's no success for any of us

If it continues going this way

It's not a damn bit

I sure wish I had the solution

We'll be hiding all the stories

they told

Ford Mustang

Honda Odyssey

Chevrolet Blazer

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