Carmagazine is a car magazine/website that publishes articles about cars. Mentioning an old story from it means they’re talking about something that was written back then.
The Renault 21 is an older French car. The hosts are talking about how its engine could be arranged in different ways, which affected how much space there was in the car—so the wheelbase could change.
Wheelbase is the distance between the front and rear wheels. If the engine is arranged differently, the car may need a different wheelbase to make everything fit.
“Transverse” means the engine sits sideways in the car. Because it takes up space differently than other layouts, it can affect the car’s overall shape and wheelbase.
“Longitudinal” means the engine is lined up front-to-back. That changes how the drivetrain and other parts fit, so the car may need different measurements like wheelbase.
The Monaco circuit is the famous Formula One track in Monaco. It’s made of narrow streets with lots of turns and walls, so it’s very challenging to drive.
The Bentley Bentayga is a luxury SUV from Bentley. It’s the kind of car that’s meant to feel upscale and comfortable, even though it’s still a serious, quick vehicle.
Road positioning is basically where you drive in your lane. Putting the car in the right spot helps you see better and makes turning smoother and safer.
The Iso Grifo is a classic, rare Italian sports/grand touring car. People love it for its unique shape and the fact that it feels like a proper enthusiast’s classic.
The Maserati Ghibli is a Maserati model that’s meant to be sporty and stylish. In this moment, they’re just pointing out a particular Ghibli they saw at the event.
A parcel shelf is a panel behind the back seats. If it’s “partial,” it covers only part of the space, which can affect what you can see and how the car sounds inside.
Battery electric vehicles are cars that run on electricity stored in a battery, not gasoline. The speaker is sharing a news statistic about how big EVs have become in new car sales worldwide.
A tipping point is the moment when things start changing faster and harder to reverse. The speaker is saying the market or politics has reached a stage where the shift will keep accelerating.
Concept
electric utility
“Electric utility” means electric cars or vans used for practical jobs, like deliveries or company work. The idea is that these kinds of vehicles are often the first to switch to electric because they fit real-world routines.
“Boot” is just the trunk area at the back of the car where you put bags and luggage. They’re saying he put the bag in carefully so it wouldn’t slide around while driving.
Your “driving position” is how you sit in the seat—how low it is and how your body lines up with the wheel and pedals. They’re describing that this driver’s setup made the car feel a certain way.
A “stunt driver” is a professional driver who does impressive, risky-looking maneuvers safely. Here, they mean the driving looked extremely skilled and controlled.
The Nürburgring is a well-known race track in Germany. Car people mention it a lot because it’s famous for being tough and because lots of driving events happen there.
This is a sportier Audi S4, not the regular A4. They’re talking about it because it hasn’t been driven in a long time, so they’re trying to get it started safely.
A jump pack is like a portable battery booster. It gives the car enough power to start when the battery isn’t strong enough on its own.
Term
disconnect
Here, “disconnect” means temporarily turning off something so the engine won’t actually fire while they’re getting it ready. It’s a safety step to prevent problems during the first attempts to start.
Compression is how an engine squeezes the mixture inside the cylinder. If the engine hasn’t been running for a while, you want to make sure it can build that pressure properly before it starts.
Oil pressure is a sign that the engine oil is flowing and lubricating the engine. If oil pressure isn’t right, it can mean the engine isn’t being protected.
The BMW 5 Series is a mid-size luxury sedan. It’s meant for comfortable everyday driving, but some versions are also built to be very fast. The podcast brings it up because the 5 Series has famous performance models in certain generations.
Those “exhaust boxes” are parts of the exhaust system that help control the noise. Swapping them can make the car sound different and may affect how the exhaust fits together.
BMW’s M5 is a special, faster version of the 5 Series. “E39” is just the code for that generation of the car, and here it’s mentioned because the speaker is trading exhaust parts for one.
“Twin tips” means the exhaust has two visible pipe openings at the back. It’s mostly a noticeable design feature, and it can also tell you which exhaust setup it is.
Jan Speed is the company that made the exhaust part the speaker still has. Aftermarket exhaust makers like this usually build parts to fit specific cars.
The Peugeot 106 is a small car, and the “XSI” version is the sportier one. Here, the speaker is talking about an exhaust “back box” that was made for a 1994 106 XSI.
“High revs” just means the engine is spinning faster (higher RPM). It usually makes the car sound more exciting and can help it feel stronger.
Term
rumble at 70 miles an hour
A “rumble” at 70 mph means you can hear a low, vibrating sound at that exact speed. That usually comes from something vibrating—like tires, exhaust, or parts in the drivetrain.
“Burn too much oil” means the engine is using oil as it runs. If it uses oil faster than expected, you may need to top it up often, and it can eventually cause engine damage.
“Oil minimum” means the car thinks the engine oil is getting too low. Low oil can’t protect the engine properly, so you should check and top up as soon as possible.
That’s a screen or gauge on the dashboard that tells you something about the engine’s oil. It can show oil level (and sometimes oil pressure) so you know the engine is being lubricated properly.
“Car and Classic” sounds like a website or service for classic cars. The speaker is saying you can go there to find the kind of cars they’re talking about.
The Bentley Mulsanne is a top-tier luxury Bentley sedan. It’s the kind of car people buy when they want a very comfortable, high-end ride rather than something small and sporty.
Concept
Mr Cooper effect
This is a nickname for the idea that what you love early on sticks with you. The host is saying your first big car impressions can strongly influence what you think is “cool” later.
Concept
homunculus
A “homunculus” is basically a metaphor for an internal mental picture. In this conversation, it means you might carry an early idea of the “perfect car” in your head.
An algorithm is a set of rules a computer follows to solve a problem. Here, it means car companies using lots of computer logic to design and tune cars.
Ferrari is a famous Italian car brand known for very fast, special cars. The point here is that seeing your first Ferrari on the street is a big childhood excitement.
Le Mans is a famous long-distance race in France where cars have to keep going for a full day. If a car wins there, it’s a big sign it’s truly fast and durable.
They’re talking about the Mercedes-Benz 300 SL as a standout older car. The point is that it was created with a clear vision and engineering direction, not watered down by too many opinions.
Here, “vintage” means older cars, but the hosts are arguing about what counts. Is it about a certain look and type of race car, or just any older cars from the past?
The Volkswagen Golf is a compact car that many people use for daily driving. It’s well known and common, so it often shows up in car conversations. The podcast brings it up as part of a wider discussion about classic cars and what people drive.
A status symbol is something that signals you’re doing well or want others to think you are. In cars, it can be the brand, badge, or new features that make you look successful.
“On that ladder” is a metaphor for moving up in life. The speaker means people often start with certain cars when they’re young, and then their choices change as they get older.
They’re talking about older cars that look simpler—less branding and fewer fancy add-ons. The idea is that the car feels more about driving than showing off.
They’re describing why older cars can feel special: you can sense the mechanics, the interior/engine has a distinct smell, the styling is more tactile, and the controls are physical dials. It’s about the car feeling more “real” than just digital screens.
Concept
spitfires for the road
They’re using a metaphor: like a fighter plane, the car feels quick and exciting. The point is that these older cars are actually fun and fast, not slow.
Concept
hi-fi watches
This is a tongue-in-cheek phrase comparing watches to cars as a hobby people get into. The main idea is that some tastes come from what you were taught or assumed, rather than from real experience.
Concept
external combustion engines vs internal combustion engines
Some engines burn fuel outside the engine (like steam engines), and others burn fuel inside the engine. That difference affects how the engine makes power and how it feels to watch or drive.
Camber is the angle of the wheels compared to straight up and down. Positive camber means the wheel leans outward at the top, which can affect how well the tire grips when you turn.
Topic
Vartzie race
They’re talking about a vintage race event where older cars compete. It’s used as an example of seeing these cars in action.
The Bugatti Type 251 is an old racing car made by Bugatti. It’s very rare and built for motorsport, not normal everyday driving. The podcast mentions it because it’s a notable historic car that was driven by someone special.
The Bugatti Type 51 is an old-school race car from Bugatti, built for speed and competition. The hosts are talking about how well it can be driven even though it’s not like a modern car with all the safety and grip tech.
Term
TSL timing
“TSL timing” is a way of measuring lap times and speed around a track. The speaker is saying they looked at the timing data before discussing the run.
A chicane is a section of the track that makes you weave through a couple of turns instead of going straight. It’s designed to make cars slow down and handle carefully.
This is describing the tire not gripping cleanly—like it’s sliding a bit and wasting energy as heat. The speaker is saying you could see that traction loss happening at the front wheel.
Term
scramble
A “scramble” here means a busy, hectic moment with lots of people around. The speaker is saying they were very close to the driver during that event area.
Company
Bruntythorpe
Bruntythorpe is the name of the track where these driving stories happened. The speaker is talking about past events there and how people reacted to tire noise.
Car
M635 CSI
The BMW M635 CSI is an older BMW performance car. The host is saying that when Matt Walton was a kid, he was already driving it in a way that involved lots of sliding—basically learning car control early.
The Ford Fiesta is a small, common car. Here it’s brought up because the speaker didn’t want to be seen in it, even though it was basically just a practical, inexpensive choice.
A “wedge car” is a car that looks like a wedge: low in front, wide in the middle, and tapering down toward the nose. People like it because it looks fast and it also helps airflow over the body.
The Lamborghini Countach is a legendary Lamborghini supercar with a very sharp, wedge-like look. The host is talking about seeing one of the earliest versions at a major car show in 1976.
The Lotus Esprit is a British sports car that’s famous for its sharp, low wedge look. The host is using it as an example of the kind of design they mean by “wedge car.”
A “mid engine” car puts the engine closer to the middle of the car instead of the front. That usually makes the car feel more balanced and easier to control in corners.
“Pop-up headlamps” are headlights that are hidden behind the bodywork and then lift up when you turn them on. They were popular on some sports cars because they improved aerodynamics when driving with lights off, but many markets later restricted them for safety and design reasons.
Lincoln Continental is a luxury car made by Lincoln (Ford’s nicer brand). The hosts mention it as a kind of car that feels special and comfortable, especially in the context of big, open-top style choices.
A four-door cabriolet is basically a convertible with four doors. That usually makes it easier to get in and out of the back seats while still enjoying the open-top experience.
A W12 is a type of engine with 12 cylinders arranged in a special shape. It’s uncommon, and it’s usually used in luxury cars because it can run very smoothly.
Term
U-turn
A U-turn is when you turn the car around so you can drive back the way you came. The host is describing doing that and then hitting the same problem again.
An Alpina B10 is a special BMW-based car made by Alpina. It’s meant to feel fast and refined, not flashy, and the “early 2000s” part just means a particular older generation.
“Long roof” is the look of a wagon/estate where the roof stretches back farther than on a normal sedan. People who like this style usually love how it changes the car’s proportions.
A “shooting brake” is basically a stylish car shape that mixes a coupe look with a wagon-like back. It usually has more room than a normal coupe, but still looks sporty.
A “notchback” is a car shape where the roof ends and then the trunk area starts in a more sudden step. You can usually see a clear “break” in the side profile.
“Intake” is the part of the car that brings air into the engine. Changing it can make the engine breathe differently and often changes the sound you hear.
The scuttle is the area under the windshield, near the top of the engine bay. The speaker is basically saying the sound seemed to be coming from that region.
They’re talking about a Ford Granada, and they mention it has a three-liter engine. It’s being used as a clue for which car matches the “cheese” they’re describing.
The Fiat X1/9 is an older small sports car made by Fiat. It’s known for being compact and fun to drive, with the engine placed toward the middle of the car. People talk about it because it’s a recognizable classic with a sporty design.
The Citroën 2CV is an older French car known for being simple and unusual. It’s famous for its quirky design and how it drives compared to normal cars. The podcast mentions it because it’s a recognizable classic with a distinctive identity.
The Fiat Uno is a small hatchback car. A “Turbo” version means it’s tuned to feel quicker than the regular ones. People talk about it because it’s a compact car with a more exciting performance option.
A “turbo” is a turbocharger that helps the engine breathe better by pushing extra air in. That usually makes the car feel quicker than the same engine without a turbo.
The Ford Capri is an older sporty-looking car, usually a coupe. The Mark II 3.0L S is a more powerful version of that model. People talk about it because it’s a classic that many enthusiasts still remember.
They’re talking about owning two cars for two different purposes. One is for everyday family life, and the other is a fun sports car for when you’re not dealing with the kids.
They’re talking about the Alfa Romeo Spider, an Italian open-top roadster. Here it’s used as an example of a certain kind of driver and lifestyle, not a deep technical review.
They’re saying the Toyota Land Cruiser is the dependable, go-anywhere SUV. In the story, it’s the choice for someone who wants a car that won’t break down.
That “Busso V6” is a specific kind of V6 engine used in some classic Alfa Romeos. People love it because it sounds great and feels lively when you start the car. The host is saying the engine note is part of what makes the car turn heads.
This is a 1971 Datsun 240Z, a classic Japanese sports car. It’s the kind of car that looks cool and feels sporty, but it’s not as flashy as a Ferrari. The host is saying it’s a smart choice if you want attention without trying too hard.
They mention a Chevy Camaro as a joke example of a car you’d pick if you were trying to look like you didn’t have great options. It’s a famous American sports car, so it stands out compared with the more subtle picks. No technical details are really the point here.
The Dodge Journey is a family-oriented SUV/crossover. It’s built to carry people and gear comfortably for normal daily driving. The podcast mentions it in the context of a specific variant or body style someone had.
The Porsche Cayman is a popular mid-engine Porsche sports car. The speaker is basically saying the Alfa is more interesting because it isn’t the “usual” pick like a Cayman.
The Jeep Commander is a mid-size SUV. It’s designed to carry people and gear comfortably for everyday driving. The podcast mentions it as an example of a more mainstream, practical Jeep choice.
Jaguar is a car brand. “British Jaguar day” sounds like an event where people get together to celebrate Jaguar cars.
LIVE
Hello, and welcome to the car podcast with Chris Terrace and his friends.
Everyone on this podcast works really hard, in fact they're not willing to remind each
other with on a daily basis.
I think this is episode 85, is it?
It is 85.
Do you know what 85 is?
He goes.
85 is the year when the greatest racing driver ever won his first world championship.
Alan Prost?
Yep.
Yep.
It was actually the year when the greatest racing driver ever won his first race.
Oh, there you go.
I'll start with the fact.
Lapping everybody up to the second place guy.
That's how good he was.
Nigel Matz was spun off on the start-finish line as the greatest racing driver ever crossed
it.
So, I'll start with a factoid.
This is quite a good factoid this week.
I met with someone I used to work with on Sunday at the Bister scramble and I said to
him, his name is Richard Bremner.
He won't listen to this, but he's right up there in terms of being a car nerd.
Those of you that have read his stuff will know exactly who he is.
I said I was reading a story in Carmagazine from 1986, I think it was, or 85, about the
new Renault 21.
And did you know that the Renault 21 came with two wheelbases because it had a transverse
engine option and a longitudinal engine option and Renault dealt with that by having different
wheelbases.
And Bremner said, ah, but you're wrong.
There were four wheelbases because the Savannah had a longer wheelbase, plus it had transverse
unlonger to legend.
So the Renault 21 came with four different wheelbases.
That's a good factoid.
That's brilliant.
Now, I want to add one other thing.
It's a question.
I recently woke up, really recently woke up and I made myself a cup of tea and it's got
a few lumps in it.
Would you A, drink it because you're pretty partial and want to drink it, or would you
go to the fridge quickly and leave your learning friends together with the first topic so you
could check if the milk's off?
Later.
Right.
I'm going to pull this thing on your back, set you going and I might disappear for a minute
to check on the milk.
First point on the agenda is your week, cars or news?
I suspect we'll all be choosing something quite similar.
Let's go first with Neil Clifford.
Well, I'm choosing the thing that I was the only one that did this thing because obviously
we did another thing, which we all did.
So I'm leaving that to you.
I went to Monaco Historic F1 weekend.
Normally go with my son, actually, Vincent, because he likes to be a photographer and
A-level photography, but actually it's every two years, which is sort of good and bad.
I think it's probably good because you get two years worth of getting excited about it
as opposed to an every year thing, which maybe gets a bit more standard.
I went with my wife.
We flew into Nice Thursday night, actually.
So we were there on the sort of practice, well done, tea's no lumpy tea.
We were there for practice and then we were there for quality on Saturday, get a little
train from Nice.
I'd really, really recommend it.
There's something about the South of France that even though the food's a bit overrated
in my view, we much prefer to be in Italy if you're talking about food than France, but
the light, the sun, it's like a filter on the sun down there, which has got this sort
of goldy yellow vibe early in the morning, little train into Monaco.
And it sounds like, oh my God, it's a very sort of posh, poncy thing to do.
And of course, if you stay in Monaco, there's probably not 100 quid hotels, but you can
stay in Nice where there are 100 quid hotels, it's 60 euros a ticket for the weekend, 60
euros.
Good price.
Can't stand tickets, 60 euros.
So where were you staying?
How far out?
I was staying in Monaco.
Oops.
But I mean, yes, it's not 100 quid, but it's not 1000 quid, you know, I wasn't in the sort
of Uber, Uber Poncy hotels that are there, but we're staying in the, we're staying in
the Fairmont, which is on the, on the hairpin over the tunnel.
Yes, great.
Yeah, amazing.
And I suppose, I suppose, you know what?
You have to just admire everyone involved because they're preserving history, but it's
more than that because it's, they're, they're using history.
The, the noise is, I mean, you sort of, I don't like being negative about anything,
but when you hear those, I know, I mean, it's 30s, it's, it's obviously not much, wasn't
much going on in Europe in the 40s about racing cars, 30s, late 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s, all the
way up to sort of 85, 86.
So there's seven or eight different groups, all Formula One cars, amazingly brave people.
I'm lucky enough now to have a few mates that actually do it.
Joe, Mark, Marino.
I like being brave, watching my friends being brave, basically, which I think is quite
brave.
It's about the bravest I can be.
And you, the mechanics, the, the, the, everyone is just a foot, you go down to the
paddock and drag my wife out of bed and will drag my son out of bed at six 15 and you
get down to the paddock at sunrise, right on the, right on the water, where all the
Ponzi boats are, you can go in there, including with your 60 euro ticket, see the sun come
up, see the covers come off these most glorious machines with all these amazing people working
on them.
And it's, it's a fabulous, fabulous weekend.
I don't know what the scott, there's, we must have a Scottish only podcast, I think,
because I know we touched on it before, the sort of bravery of the skills of the Scottish
driver.
And there's a bit of sort of Italian mixed in there, isn't there, whether it be Joe
Mercario or Marina or Dario, this sort of that lovely mix of Scotland and Italy.
And it's so admirable.
And I suppose it's a special place, the place is gorgeous, the place is unique, the
architecture, the sunlight, as I've said, wandering around Monaco, having a
slightly shitty French coffee at seven AM, because it's not Italy, but apart from, you
know, it's amazing.
And seeing this place that is the most unique place in the world very much, or certainly
one of them, isn't it?
So I would highly recommend it.
I had a wonderful time.
I get too scared to actually watch the race.
So I then get on a plane and come home and watch it in my kitchen on my iPad, because
there's, there's practice Friday, quality Saturday, which we watched.
And then Sunday is the racing.
My wonderful friend Mark Shaw won in his car, which I can't remember what it's
called, but it's the blue one, the American one, with the lovely sort of
scarab, it's a scarab.
Only one of three, won the first race.
So yeah, that's what I did.
And and 2028 is the next time I went to Bista.
Is it busy at the historic?
Amazing, isn't it?
I mean, it's clearly not empty, but there's plenty of tickets.
Grandstands are awful.
I suppose the obvious thing to do is go to the Formula One, which I've been
lucky to do a couple of times.
But you know what?
It's a ball, like it's much better on telly.
Yeah, yeah, you don't know what's going on.
Be the car sound a bit shit.
And certainly if you go to this, God, do they sound shit?
You know, listening to those DFVs and those V12 Ferraris, they had a Ferrari
procession of 1990 and 2000 cars.
So all that, you know, all the dudes that own those cars and Ferrari were
there in abundance and looking after those cars.
Joe McCarrie drove one of the Schumacher V10s to hear those going round 20 of
them around the Monaco circuit is just everyone needs to experience that.
And, you know, it's 60 euros and cheap flight into Nice and a train ride.
So it's it's really great.
Yeah, it did look pretty fantastic.
OK, Manage, how was your week?
It's a lot of fun.
Unfortunately, we weren't at the Monaco Classic, but I had a friend
who was there who was sending me lots of videos over the whole weekend.
And really, they did have just about everything there, didn't they?
I saw you as Ferrari's McLaren's.
Oh, did you have a good time? Was he having a good time?
Yeah, I said hello. Yeah, yeah, it was a very, very Ferrari-tastic weekend.
We went to Bista, Bista Motion.
And I have to say I drove the Green Beast there, the Bentayga,
which I'm getting more and more used to.
I wasn't sworn out.
My road positioning in general was a lot better than.
First, the possession of the car was way too far over to the left all the time.
I saw some very beautiful cars there, but I want to talk about two cars
that I saw that literally made my tongue hang out.
There was a an iso grifo there.
We must have seen it, the sort of deep metallic grey with the Coyo leather inside.
I, oh, the more I see that car, the more I think, actually,
if I had to pick a 70s car, probably would be 60, 70s.
Probably be that, actually.
They're so unique.
The proportions are just so, so perfect.
I just I stared and stared and stared and stared at that.
Whoever owns that car, I mean, they love that car.
That interior was absolutely immaculate, but used.
Somebody drives that car.
And the other thing there was a blue Maserati Ghibli.
Have you saw the navy blue one?
Absolutely stunning car.
And there's a slight twist in this is when I was leaving,
I had to go and do an errand.
So I left Bista for a bit and came back.
The Ghibli was parked on the side of the road.
In the past lane, a couple of cones around it just broke my heart.
But it gives you a little bit of perspective.
You lean back and sort of say, if you want a car like that,
you have to be prepared for moments like that, overcome them.
And it's like a good marriage, I think, having a car that you love in that way.
Things don't always go right.
But you work your way through them because it's worth it.
You know, you don't you don't.
I would never.
I think I'm also just looking at that Ghibli.
I was looking at the lines, looking at the back window,
looking at the length and the proportions.
And she does seem to be, for me, the spiritual kind of ancestor to Lola.
Very similar brief, very.
I think that one had a partial parcel shelf at the back, didn't it?
I don't think the one that was at Bista had two back seats,
but it was just such such a beautiful car.
So I rather love that.
Quick bit of news was that the Financial Times reported on the 26th of April
that battery electric vehicles now count for one quarter of all global new car sales.
And even though Chinese Chinese cars in China,
the BV proportion fell slightly, Chinese exports went up.
And they think the reason why I think it's a really important story is because.
They think the tipping point has been reached.
And I think that sort of recent geopolitical events are only going to accelerate this.
So we're looking at sort of electric utility and it does feel like it's the dawn of something.
And my third little note is tomorrow is May the 1st.
We're recording this on April the 30th.
And tomorrow is sadly the 32nd anniversary of Senna's death.
Today is the 32nd anniversary of Roland Ratzenberger's death.
It was a very, very horrible weekend.
I'd say on May the 1st every year, I do have a little quiet moment and reflect on that
because that weekend did unfold live, sadly, for me.
So these are the what we did in cars and what we will be doing in cars tomorrow.
32 years, I know.
It's unbelievable. He was 34 when he went.
Imagine Senna's a 66 year old now.
You might he wouldn't have put on any weight.
But you'd have had that age.
Brazil is a plastic surgery capital of the world.
So perhaps he might have had a little work done.
You might have looked the same.
Yeah, you're not the same.
It's quite a thought, isn't it?
It's quite a thought.
Chris Cooper, your your week in cars or a bit of news up to you?
I've just spent 24 hours in Warsaw, Poland,
which is fantastic, really.
Poland is a fantastic country.
It's got so many things going on right now.
Obviously, lots of Ukrainians still living there, displaced and
things going on with neighbors, so forth.
But it's a fantastic country.
It's vibrant. It's energetic.
It's can do its building.
And to get around, I downloaded one of those ride
hailing apps, the Bolt, one of that one hadn't had that one before.
And yesterday, late afternoon,
I had to get from the offices of the client in one of my day jobs.
I know some of you on this podcast only really somehow muddled by with one day job.
But, you know, anyway, anyway, we don't like talking about how hard you work again.
We don't like talking about consumer.
I thought that was just pre-pod.
I don't like talking about how hard he works.
Exactly. The listeners don't need to hear this.
They're all supposed to be very angry about it.
Anyway, I digress.
So I hailed this ride and I think came up on here that basically said,
your driver, Anthony, with an eye, will be with you shortly.
He has a white Toyota Corolla.
Did it say, please don't tell him how hard you work.
It's getting boring.
No, it didn't have that.
No, that didn't quite get through the translator.
OK, right.
So Anthony was there and he had a pristine white Toyota Corolla,
which initially think, well, they're all Toyota Corollas, really, and these sort of things.
The reason I'm showing it was it was.
He is driving and he's care of his car.
Young chap, quite young, very fit looking, quite sort of trendy looking guy.
And as we got into the car, he opened the boot, you know,
even the way he took my bag and placed it into the boot
and made sure it wasn't going to move around.
I thought, this might be an interesting ride.
So he got into the back of the car.
I need to sort of and he had he had that driving position.
He had that driving position.
He would the seat was right low down.
Somehow he got this wheel right here in front of him.
He looked relaxed, but alert.
And as he started to move off, he just turned around to me,
just half turned his head and said to me,
Mr. Chris, because I suspect the Chris and the Coupe got mixed up, said, Mr. Chris.
May I suggest you put your seatbelt on now?
Oh, and it was quite busy because, like, you know,
end of end of sort of work day, at least end of work day for some.
And the way he drove that car, it was like watching a stunt driver.
It was smooth, but brutally effective.
He just, you know, there's a gap, right, we've gone.
Wish, you know, there's like, actually, if I go, if I take a lane over now,
I can go forward and I'll be three cars further on.
And then I can make the right I need to there.
It was all smooth.
There was no jerk, no sort of it was just wonderful.
The inside.
I can ask a question and if in about a month's time,
someone phoned you from Poland and said, you won't believe this, Chris,
but you're on a national TV show because inadvertently you took a taxi ride.
And it was a national TV show that put a brilliant GT3 driver to spoof people.
They had cameras on you.
Would you believe that that could be the case?
100% that's a great feeling.
It's a hundred percent.
And I said to him, we stopped.
I said, said, you're a bloody good driver.
You're a bloody good driver.
You said, thank you, Mr.
Chris, and then that was it.
Just a lot of the head and he was off.
His car was immaculate.
He clearly cared for the car and the act of driving.
Some of the roads are quite, we complain about our roads.
I mean, they have massive.
It was like minus four yesterday morning and it's going to be in Warsaw.
There's going to be 26 degrees tomorrow.
I mean, massive temperature changes.
So a couple of the roads are a bit gnarly, but it was wonderful.
So I just, I just thought it was wonderful to go to Poland.
A young man in his job with his bolt car.
Brilliant. It was fantastic.
I really missed the idea.
Quick, quick, quick interjection.
And I just loaded a phrase into Google Translate into Polish.
It's excuse my Polish, but something like
Prakusze Barzo Sieko.
And that is I work very hard.
Did you tell him that?
No, I didn't tell him that.
No, I can't speak Polish and I was so busy.
I didn't have time to use a translator.
Good point. Good point.
Very good point.
So also I wouldn't take that crap off the lounge lizard panley
who spends most of his time in his undergarments on the sofa.
So let's go. Come on.
Monaco historic.
We actually had two invitations to go this year,
both from people with lovely, lovely boats in the harbor.
And we just because of what we're doing on Sunday and other stuff going on.
You were too busy.
Couldn't. I wasn't going to say that.
We could. I really, really saw you there on Friday and Saturday
and all the lovely pictures.
And I thought, bloody hell, it would have been lovely to go.
So Brandon, one of the lovely people who invited.
I'm, you know, I'm sort of so grateful you invited us and sort of
sort of sorry, couldn't make it the scramble.
I didn't see a single thing at the scramble this year.
Because we had this little stand,
this little part of the scramble previewing our Great British Jaguar Day,
which was great fun.
Lots of people came up and talked about their Jaguar stories.
And we had some amazing Jaguars on display,
all of which will be there on the 23rd of May.
There was one car, which I think is probably the least
well understood modern Jaguar XKRS GT.
Yeah.
It's the red one.
It's the least well understood modern Jaguar.
It's absolute such a special thing.
Penndyne very kindly brought along their XJR 15 and fired it up.
Mr. Harris thought it was a good idea to go around the back of this car
to sort of enjoy this how your eardrum still exists.
It's just extraordinary.
But the most fun part of it was Matthew Davis,
who is the CEO of Jaguar Heritage, Jaguar Dayman Heritage Trust,
who has been fantastically supportive of our event
as of colleagues at Jaguar and Jaguar Classic.
Very kindly drove from their collection that morning.
The Austin Powers Jaguar.
Yes. So we'd had to talk about this
but amongst us before the weekend to say,
because there's a suggestion that we drove it around the site.
And there was a there was a there was some mixed reactions to say,
no, Mr. Harris said,
the last time I did that somebody threw a brat first at me.
That's true.
They threw a sausage at me at the Nürburgring.
I'm never ever doing that again.
So I valiantly valvolunteered to do this.
It was great fun.
It was like middle of the morning, late morning.
So the whole place is really busy.
And I had a fantastic chat.
I think Alex, apologies, I've got your name right,
is from Mission Motorsport,
who was my lost guide to escort me around the site and clear the crowd.
You do know, Chris, that when someone is when people shout the word cock,
it's not a reference to poultry.
It's it's not. I know that I do.
It were quite a few spice girls
reference, which I I sort of felt I thought that was fine.
I thought, you know, all are welcome, all are welcome, all comments are welcome.
So it was fantastic.
So thank you very much, everybody who came and said hello,
and we'll see you on the 20th of May.
We have. And we've just designed Hot Off the Press
as a car sticker that is going to be available free
to every Jaguar that shows up on that day.
Only available on that day.
Yeah, look at that.
That's great work, Neil.
That's because it also it could from a distance,
that could be national trust, which means that you if you sell your car,
you'll be more trusted because you've got the Great British Dragon a day stick on.
You look at that.
It's your member of the National Rust.
Very, very good.
What have I done in cars this week?
I'm so I'm so I'm starting to forget what I've done in cars this week.
I've moved.
I did do this is quite this is quite interesting.
So I had to move some stuff that I've not moved in a long, long time.
One of which was a 2012 Audi S4
that used to belong to my mother has been this been stationary,
has not turned the wheel since twenty twenty one.
And before that had only been moved once since twenty nineteen.
It's not quite as bad as Jimmy Savile's room with his mother, but it's not far off.
I just thought I just thought I left the car because I'm a bit weird like that.
And I had a couple of pals with me.
Will from the cross country company who's been superb.
I've put my socials a bit, but what a great bloke helped me and James Walker as well.
The ever present James Walker.
They're like, we'll just fire it up, stick a jump.
And I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
We need to make sure we maybe, you know, disconnect or take the plugs out
so we can he can get some compression in there or do something before we work out.
It's all right before we fire it up.
Oil pressure and I'll be right.
So I just stood there waiting for it to blow up.
This thing has not done anything.
He just put the jump pack on it.
Just starts it.
Modern cars are extraordinary things.
Yeah, just starts idols, fans work away.
You go apparently needed a call pack when James are playing with it yesterday.
But other than that, we are so lucky with modern motor cars.
So they are they are built to withstand conditions and mistreatment.
But really, we shouldn't meet around them.
But I was I was very impressed.
What we do with it now, I have no idea.
So the business crumble really was spectacular for all of us.
The weather does help, doesn't it?
Once the once the fog cleared, there was a fantastic group of cars.
I managed to finally exchange on some rear exhaust boxes for an E39 M5.
I quite like the idea of a scramble where you you also have to do a sort of
swap shop exchange, you turn up, turn up with your wears and almost
becomes a bit car booting and you open your boots and you have to swap things
with people, a bit, a bit, a bit of cash could exchange hands.
But I love the idea of looking in the boots and going, oh, I wanted that head unit
or quite like the look of that spoiler splitter.
Maybe that's what we can propose to Pip and the lads, the swap shop scramble.
That's a really good idea.
Yeah.
Or because there's always something that you see in your in your boots
or in your garage that you think, I should just clear that out.
I don't need that.
I'll never use that.
I for what reason did I keep, for example, a back box made by Jan Speed
with twin tips for a Peugeot 106 XSI model year 1994.
Why did I keep that?
Why have I still got it?
I can't put it in the phone.
I don't intend to ever own it.
Look at the car like that again.
I don't like the XSI.
I'd rather have a rally and it doesn't fit that rally one doesn't fit.
So, um, yes, scramble was good.
We went up in the M five, which is running so well and remains
possibly my favorite car now, because it's mine and it at high revs.
There's not much sounds better than that.
Yeah, it just, uh, it goes like a stab rat and it's my car.
Um, I've just done, uh, Edward back in a con tee tee.
That was spectacular.
She's got a little bit of a rumble at 70 miles an hour, but other than that,
she, she gets on with it, doesn't burn too much oil to your consumption.
Surprisingly good.
Actually, it will do about 20 on a run, which you don't expect.
And I also found out, you know, when you discover things on the way back
last night, there's a line on the fuel gauge that says oil minimum.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Neil will know what I mean.
Yeah.
I didn't know about that.
Yeah.
So they're going, why would you put an oil readout on a fuel gauge?
It's a dual purpose gauge, dual function gauge.
You have a button, an oil logo.
You press that and that gauge suddenly turns to being your oil level.
And it flickers rather beautifully between the two functions.
Honestly, yeah.
My love affair with the brand from crew just grows.
The older I get, the more I want to be around Bentley.
I just love it.
That car is cool as hell.
I could have had five, 50 marinello.
There's other things, a little bit more money from that era.
And maybe the moment I ended up with that, I thought, oh, is it sporty enough for me?
Do I want a manual?
No.
No, it's cool as hell.
It really is wonderful.
Go on to car and classic now.
It doesn't have to be a T, go and buy an R, go and buy a turbo, go and buy a Mulsanne, whatever.
Get yourself something from crew.
Bipulus.
I'm stuck on the tarmac last night.
Got a bit of reception.
And I just got an Arnaj T thing going on and some really nice Arnaj T's on car and classic.
Lovely.
So, right, let's move on to the next thing.
Here we go.
If I can see it, photos.
I take a photo of the agenda normally.
Why are vintage cars, why vintage cars are much cooler when you become vintage yourself?
Well, I've just started that one, haven't I really?
So let's go to Manish first.
I wonder whether this was the Mr Cooper effect, which is in your
homunculus in your, you've got this little perfect car deep inside you.
And I think that's formed very, very early.
And it's a poster, isn't it?
Or it's that early experience with a matchbox toy or something you've seen in the street.
And I think it sits there and it defines all your concepts of cars going forward.
And I don't think you're ever really satisfied till you go back and something ticks.
That very first or those very first few cars.
And I think the older you get, the more that yearning to go back to that primal
pleasure kind of kind of comes in.
I was I was also thinking about the fact that modern cars, I would imagine if you use
computers, if you if you believe that there's an objective solution to the car,
whether it's a pickup truck or a people carrier or a sports car.
And if you use computers more and more, if you use algorithms more and more to solve
that problem, then presumably every single car company in the world will start to
gravitate towards a perfect car.
In other words, they become more and more samey, the older you get.
And, you know, for me that, you know, I'm a kid of the 70s and 80s, especially the 80s.
And if you think occasionally, you see a photograph of a car park in Britain from the 80s.
And the things that hit you are French cars look French, German cars look German, British
cars look British, Italian cars look Italian.
There are very few American cars in that photo.
The colors are extraordinary.
You know, people really believed in color, didn't they?
In the 70s and 80s.
They were colors.
And I think, I think maybe that's what being vintage is.
It's just trying.
It's a great line, isn't it?
Right at the end of the Great Gatsby, you know, where, you know, Gatsby's concept of
perfection or happiness is walking to the end of the pier and reaching out for this
green light that he'll never get.
And I do wonder whether that green light is set inside us.
Just, you know, it is.
It's it's it's top trumps.
It's seeing that first Ferrari on the street.
It's it's exactly that.
You know, appreciating the size of a Rolls Royce when you're a kid.
And I I do wonder, I mean, for me, anyway, these things are only ever scratched by going
back, not really by looking forward to the terrible thing to say in a way, a terrible
thing to admit.
But I find less and less pleasure, less and less pleasure in the future, unless
somebody makes a really bold kind of decision to go, go back and explore the
past and find something perhaps in a new way.
And we may have had a sample of that recently.
But I think that's right.
I think being bold, ignoring the algorithm, because those cars, especially,
let me just look at the old Bentley.
What did Bugatti say about them?
You just said they, you know, basically, they were fast bricks.
But that was W O's concept of a car.
That's what he built.
You know, that's how they came.
And that's why they won Le Mans.
And then, you know, you look a little bit later at something like the 300 SL
Mercedes, no Italian could have built that.
That wasn't designed by committee.
You know, I think and I think, you know, nor were we.
So I think that's what that's what that question means to me.
Neil Kevin, by vintage, do you mean really, you know, open, open winged,
open, open wheels, cars, and that's our vintage?
Or do you just mean all the cars?
Well, I think that Manish actually really gave me a little catalyst in my mind,
which was different to where my thinking was on this question, actually,
because we all, yeah, my point on this was about old, old, but actually vintage
vintage can be so many things, can't it?
I think vintage, you know, our era of cars, probably if we if we look inside
ourselves and talk about our true loves is those cars that we grew up with
when we were at the beginning of this car journey.
So for me, it is that 70s into 80s period.
If you're, you know, if you're 10 years older than me, I'm sure you are
fifties into sixties in your Maserati 250 Fs or your, you know, 250 GTOs
or whatever he types.
For me, it was, you know, it's the I'm very similar age to Manish.
I think it's the, you know, the wedgie moment and those late, late, late
seventies car magazines, but what I was thinking about here was when I used
to go and still go or try and, you know, a few of my mates are still up for it,
go to Le Mans or, you know, when you were young in those late eighties,
nineties, and you see what looked like 200 year old people when you're driving
on, you're driving onto the ferry at Pompey because the tunnel wasn't built yet
and you're in your Corrado or you're in your, you know, whatever 205 GTI and
there's all these old dudes driving on with their Bentley's or whatever it may
be. And you think, oh, silly old, silly old fuckers, you know, why are they
driving those old things that are slow and they're going to break down?
And because you're young and you want shiny new things and you want gadgets
and you want the latest high fine, you know, badges, status symbols, you know,
you're trying to demonstrate your either current success or future success.
You're on that ladder. And then suddenly you're an old fucker.
You know what I mean? It goes really quickly, doesn't it? Even though,
hopefully it's only about what you look like and inside you stay young because
I think that's really, you know, bloody important, obviously, but suddenly
you're old and you're spending more time at a member's meeting or revival,
looking at all that old shit that you didn't really thought was very
interesting before. And you're like, actually, it's amazing because it's
it's stripped of badges and gadgets and got less to prove.
And the great irony is that at that moment, which you've usually described
as being young, a bit Patrick Bateman, a bit thrusting, wanted to demonstrate
your wealth and success, nothing would have been better or more comprehensive
than rolling up in an old blower and a leather bag and just rolling on to a
ferry because those that know would go, that's someone that's really made it.
But you didn't know that when you were young.
No, you're less intelligent, aren't you? You're less worldly, you're less informed,
you're less knowledgeable, you're less experienced.
So I think now for me, you know, and I don't know because you we're all geeky,
right? We've all got this sort of disease of beardiness of our era, you know,
my specialized subject is late 70s, early 80s, probably if I was in, you know,
on mastermind, you know, I can't tell you what type of Bugatti that is,
or I can't tell you what alpha that is when you're walking around those paddocks.
But when you look at the engineering and the smells and the design and the dials
and the leather on the seats, and you know what, they're fast.
That's what you think. You thought they were slow old shitters, didn't you?
They're really quick. They're spitfires for the road, aren't they?
They're exciting and the noise and so I think, I don't know,
maybe it's just about you do become a bit more intelligent and more open,
you know, to more curious. I think maybe some of our
in astigmatisms are exposed as being folly.
And because we haven't been curious to break them down or investigate why it is,
we assumed that particular piece of behavior or reaction. We've been stuck with it.
I tell you, the weirdest one for me has nothing to do with cars. It has to do with fish.
I'll tell you a fish story that relates to this.
So my late daddy died when I was quite young in 1999.
It's a bit of a shock. And I remember sitting there trying to work out how on earth we were
going to continue or do anything. I had a very small family, but those of us that were left were
like, fuck, this is new. What's going on here? And I went out for dinner with my mother.
She was obviously broken and we went, she liked fish. She went to a fish restaurant.
I thought it'd be nice to take her to a fish restaurant and I sat there and she went,
what are you going to have? I don't eat fish. And she said, well, why don't you eat fish?
I said, because father didn't eat fish, so I don't eat fish. And she went,
I never really thought about that. That is weird. So you never actually base your decision on what
you liked or didn't like. You just inherited an opinion and an attitude. This does link back
into the cars, I think. And she said, well, I'll only use something off this menu that I think
will suit someone that's never said they liked fish because they thought they'd impressed their
daddy by not eating fish like him. And she gave me, I think, a piece of sea bass that had been
cooked simply, but a butter capers, you know, cooked correctly and handed it over. And I went,
this is utterly delicious. This is, I just realized I spent 23 years of my life not doing this,
not based on any facts at all. It was just based on an inherited need to not do it. And I think
that's what happens a lot with, you can have with cars, hi-fi watches, people are our day-to-day
behaviors. If someone says, why do you hold that opinion? Sometimes when you're young, you have
to go, I don't really know. I just sort of do. And I think vintage, vintage cars is this, I have
exactly the same thing as you. If someone said to me, why, I might lean towards your brilliant
analogy of the sort of buttons and the car magazines and what I was into. But it was probably
because I just, someone told me they were shit. It might be as simple as that. Chris Cooper, what
do you think? It's interesting, isn't it? Some of my earliest memories are my brother and I being
taken to various steam fare events or other vintage type thing. My father was an engineer,
mechanical engineer, and he could, he could build and fix things. He had, he had a workshop.
And he had not just one laser in it, he had two laser in it. That's impressive. Various other
from scratch, building a steam engine, functioning, working steam engine. And I suspect our part in
it was watching it for a bit and then getting a bit bored because it all looked a bit sort of,
it's a steam engine really and sort of they're old, aren't they? And they're not very good. And
they're sort of the external combustion engines as opposed to internal combustion engines. It's
a difference. That's why an internal combustion engine was called that because it sort of superseded
something which was familiar and around where the combustion was outside in this little fire with
the coal and sort of things went. And I'd always sort of felt the way and watching vintage cars,
which generally speaking is sort of between the wars vintage cars, sort of technically.
This is a weird analogy. I always felt quite uncomfortable watching them. It was a bit like
watching a horse on a cross country event that a horse show, which I also used to get to sort of
taken to when I was a bit younger. And I always thought the horse looked really vulnerable and
exposed. Sort of clashing up walls and jumping over a Land Rover. That's going to hurt if you hit the
Land Rover and ditches and everyone's falling off the whole time. Sometimes horses and people can
get hurt or worse. And I'd always kind of had that feeling about vintage cars, which was they
looked the wheels, their legs look kind of slightly not quite right. Sort of, you know, as they cornered
Oh God, that's an awful lot of positive camber. It's just going to fall off. It's going to really,
really hurt. And that hadn't changed until at the members meeting on the Sunday morning,
the boys and I, a couple of their friends watched the Vartzie race, which is essentially for sort
of vintage sort of biggatties and Alfa Romeo's and stuff from between the wars. And we stood
right at the fence at the sort of the exit second apex of the chicane coming on staff industry.
And I had to look it up because it looked like a Bugatti. I didn't know which one it was.
It's a Bugatti Type 51 driven by Matt Walton. He was a magician and artist. And he was clearly
properly on. I think I looked at this, I've just looked at the TSL timing thing just before we came
on. His fastest lap, I think was an average speed of 90 miles an hour. This is a car with no brakes
and no tires and the wheels are made of spokes from a thrown away bicycle.
Coming out of that chicane, I noticed I've never noticed, apart from the sort of the
horse about to fall down across country look of the positive camber of the front wheel,
I noticed there was smoke issuing from the outside front wheel. They're so on it,
as they sort of power out of the chicane that last left hander.
There's enough slip and slide and scrub in that front wheel that it smokes, not because of power
and sort of a one tire fire, just that's how much energy is going through that. And it just,
every lap, a couple of times he really just, you could see him carrying a bit too much speed and
that is just going to end up half a foot too further on. We loved it, all of us really loved it.
Do you know what's really interesting about that is that you, without realising it,
were stood about three feet from Matt Walton at the scramble. So he came over to say hello with his
that's one of the most beautiful displays of car control and speed in something I hadn't really
ever understood. It was wonderful. The Walton's relationship with Bruntythorpe is fascinating
and actually it was great to see his father who I think had some health issues recently,
he's looking much better. And they came up and we just talked about the old times and all the
times that I'd get a massive bollocking for making too much tire noise at Bruntythorpe and get
called in. And I thought they'd remember it negatively. They said that was all good fun,
wasn't it? There was always trouble. You were always, there was always, do you remember when
Cerzo Cerzo fired it into the trees and that one rolled it and but Matt obviously grew up.
He's our equivalent of a Scandinavian rally driver. He grew up with a test track by his door
and I'm not saying he hasn't got a gold given skill. He's a superb driver but at the age of
about 12 they had these old M635 CSI stuff that he would just be skidding the hell out of.
No, and then he took up light aircraft. That was another one altogether. But he's one of us. He's
one of us. He just doesn't seem to have limits and I didn't see him at Goodwill and I didn't,
obviously I had my own reasons to go home but I heard he driven beautifully and he does a bit
of this. He's just so relaxed that he's going to go to Classic Le Mans. Yeah, we thought about
that. I don't know really, I might, we'll see how he goes but I'm glad that we appreciate what he did.
I think, I just, as you get older, your taste change. Sometimes that reinforces a position
that you've held and you think I'm vindicated in doing what I did. Another time you think,
well that was nonsense. I have no idea why I hadn't been engaging with that. I've been denied an
avenue of pleasure that I should have been enjoying for the previous 51 years of my life.
But the great thing is, whichever course you think you've taken, whichever trajectory,
you can start enjoying it now. So, you know, without sounding totally cliched, it's never too late.
Yeah. And you can suddenly turn around and go, well, I quite like MGBs or vintage cars or whatever
it is. I think what I do like is age diminishes self-consciousness and that begins to evaporate
and it doesn't matter. And, you know, I think a very good part of that is if you're lucky enough
to have children, when you really don't give a shit about embarrassing yourself and your children,
just to remind them that nothing, that doesn't matter. I like doing that. And I think if you've
reached that point, then all of the preconceived badges you held about certain cars just fall
by the wayside, don't they? Previously, I can remember, this is so shameful. My father had a
car stolen and he had a Ford Fiesta that was hanging that belonged to someone at work. And
I think he just thought, well, I'm going to have that because it's cheap for three months.
And I, I used to, I used to hope that I could get picked up from school around the corner.
I didn't like the look of it. I wasn't snobbish, but I just like, I don't want to go in the Fiesta.
And he'd rock up. I didn't have the minerals to go, can you park that shed around the corner please?
Of course, because he'd have punched me in the face, rightly so. But I, but if that happened,
if my kids did that to me, I'd just say, I'd make sure I turned up in it every day for the next year,
just to remind them it doesn't matter. So yeah, go out there and try, go try some old source,
because it's wonderful. What is your favorite genre of car? Bloody hell, how long have you got?
Flat 12 engine cars, I'm joking. Let's go for Manish first.
I mean, I think you'll all be shocked to realize that it is the wedge car. That's it. I mean,
if there's a genre, if there's something that I, you know, it turned my head then,
it turns my head now. I should just share, I sent on the group chat, I managed to find
a little AP clip. I don't know if you sort of saw it on the group group chat,
but I found the first Kuntush I ever saw, the 1976 Earl's Court Motor Show. And somebody did
a tiny little clip on it. And it was then that kind of bronzy, goldy tan color, whatever it is.
And there's something, let me just go back to my little, my little piece of moment ago.
There was something about seeing. At that time, mid 70s, late 70s, I mean, cars were hat shaped.
The silhouette was hat shaped. That's what it was with a couple of wheels. And if you went to any
infant school, you went to a little prep school, people drew four wheels, you know, on a car. That's
what they were. That's what they weren't. I don't, someone sat down and again, they wouldn't have had
the computers that they have now, maybe used a wind tunnel, but somebody just went, you know what,
this is the shape of cast. But maybe it was Marcello Gandini. I don't know who designed the
first wedge car, which you'd find out. It feels like a Bertone thing.
Google it. I'll Google it. You carry on. I'd love to know. I suspect it was Leonardo da Vinci.
He just didn't know it.
You're right. Helicopter, the first plane in the first wedge car.
There is just something about, there's something about the proportions. And then
there's one other factor with the wedge car. It's the mid engine. So it's where you then see
the cockpit with a wedge car. It's slightly forward. So you get this very balanced,
very balanced shape. And I know, you know, I just listed them, the Contascio Rabco,
the Berlinetta Boxer, the 308 GT42 plus two, the Lotus Esprit, you know, it's the smallest engine
of all of those. And, and, you know, what do they have? They're mid engine. They're relatively light.
They're immensely well balanced. I find Porsche's, you know, Porsche's incredibly impressive. But
for me, the aesthetics, the position of the engine, they're just very different. I'm not
saying worse. They're just very different. There's just something about that, that absolute shape,
those proportions, the position of the engine, how they drove. It's wonderful. And I suppose the
spiritual successor to that is probably the Alpine. It's probably the Alpine that you guys have.
It's, it's, you know, we're not loud pop up headlamps anymore. They've been, you know,
they've been made illegal for new cars. But what you've got with the Alpine is something that's
in a way kind of similar, it's very low, very light, engine in exactly the right place, two
seats. And, you know, for me, that that is the genre, that is the genre, the mid engine.
So the internet is quite interesting on this, it acknowledges all the Italians, but actually,
and maybe this is because an American has got better access to Wikipedia and the historical
side of the internet. It's saying an American called Ray Canara invented something called
the, the self-titled Canara one. And that was the 1966. And they think that might be the origin
of wedge car design. Was that amazing looking thing? Was he a member of the banana splits?
Ah, very good. Very good. Let's move on, let's move on to Neil Clifford.
What a program the banana switch was. I, one of you is going to choose the estate car.
Um, and I almost did, but actually I would then I'd be lying. My favorite, my favorite genre
of cars is the very rare niche four door, sorry, start again, four seat cabriolet.
Yeah, I just like those. And I think, I think it's, it's partly, well, partly, probably quite a
lot to do with age, because I'd have, it would never have been on my agenda in my 20s or 30s,
because maybe I saw it as kind of an old farts car. Maybe I don't know why, you know,
you wanted sporty and fast and the numbers and the badges and, you know, all that.
But actually the four door, sorry, four seat. Is there a four door cabriolet?
No. Yes. I think there is. Yes. Lincoln. 600 Laudrette. There's not many of those, is there?
Lincoln Continental. Yeah, they're great as well. Maybe, maybe it is the four door cabriolet,
actually. The four seat cabriolet for me, I love, because it sort of does everything. And
as you get older, you do prefer or certainly enjoy more, let's say, a cabriolet. I do really,
really love taking the roof off a car. I think the noises are better, the smells are better,
you're exposed to a bit of vitamin, what is it, D? C? D, I think. You just feel more connected,
you feel more open. The fact that you can take your dog in the back, you can take your kids,
you can take the bloody father-in-law for a little drive, you got a boot to M&S and shopping and,
you know, picking up the papers. It does everything for me, so I think it's a happy car for me. The
four door, four seat, fucking hell, four seat cabriolet, with the biggest engine as possible,
ideally, the W12. Is it funny when our brains just decide they're going to have a hiccup on the
same thing? Yesterday, I was filming with Francis in Scotland and we had to do a couple of shots
and we had to just up some bars, as they call them, of the car we were driving to go and do this
scene. And when we came down the road for the first time, there was a drainage grill that had,
obviously, succumbs to some freeze thought and had a fucking little pot hole around it. And I
managed to dip my wheel into it and it created a bit of a thud through the car. Not a really bad one,
but a bit of a thud. Three minutes later, when I did my U-turn and came back through again,
I spotted it, I looked at it and I drove straight into it again and we both laughed.
We both laughed and I went, I don't understand why I drove into that and he went,
that is a bit odd. Third time they came out, I did exactly the same thing again.
They're just something, my brain just went, no, I'm not helping you there, you're on your own.
You're just ridiculous, exactly what you did there. Right, go on, I did it four times,
God, Mr. Giver.
This is the hardest question in the world, because I don't think there is an answer. Well,
right now, well, there's always an answer. And the answer is,
my favorite genre of cars is the one I can't afford. That's the one I look at the most
and think about the most because I can't quite afford it. And it doesn't have to be
a ludicrous expense. I've got a real itch at the moment for finding
either an early 2000s B10 Alpina, which I can't quite justify affording.
I mean, they're not silly money, but right now I can't quite justify it.
And on car and classy, I always find myself drawn to the ones I go keep going back to
and put a little tick by saying, watch this on the auction. I know I can't quite afford or justify
affording. Is that a genre?
Well, so right now, it would be cue car, four seat, four door, super saloons.
That would be it. Which I think is a genre. Your question there, you were scrutinized,
Mr. Cooper. You came up with an answer. I like that.
May I proceed? Yes.
Thank you. Good question, though, checks and bounds.
I would say thank you for leaving the estate car for me. It's very kind of all of you.
I've sat in the car last night for a long time thinking I've now got to reverse engineer this.
So it's the estate car. I've got to find a way of not saying estate car.
And I can't, I can't really. There's other genres I like and I enjoy.
But really, there's so much joy in an estate car. There's a fundamental, for me,
connection with the shape. I just, I look at saloon cars and they go, there's a bit missing.
Yeah. That, that, that I can't get over. So that brings me joy. The fact that there is,
there's a type of car that doesn't have the bit missing that works better,
that happens to be heavier, less stiff, often less good to drive and slower,
doesn't make any difference. I find long roofs appealing,
really appealing. You might almost want to sort of fetish level. I think they are,
it really is a great thing when the roof goes all the way to the back of the car
and then drops down. That for me is car design. I don't know why. I can't justify it beyond that.
Do you think the CLS sport wagon shooting brake thing? I know Neil doesn't like it.
The banana. The banana, yes. I still, you see very few of them about, but you see with the
right wheels and clear glass, you see a CLS 63 shooting brake thing. Is that the traction?
I've got one word for you. If a roof line goes pretty much all the way back to the extremity
of the car, it lends it elegance. There's an elegance to it that just is missing
in what you'd call the notch back. And I think notch back is the best way to describe
the saloon car because it does look like there's a notch missing. And yet, and yeah,
and this is why I think it's the hardest question in the world. I'm going to show a picture now,
we'll put it up on screen. It is, it's a picture of a Plymouth, a 1960s, it must be early 60s.
Look about boot. Plymouth, American Cestershire police car in white, white steel wheels,
and the boot is the longest single panel in the whole car. I followed him out. I followed
him out on Saturday from Goodwood. And when you got to the Rolls-Royce roundabout,
it almost didn't make it round at about 18 miles an hour. It looked to me. I'm sure it did,
but it was horrific round the corner. God, it looked, it looked superb on its little wheels though.
Yeah, I imagine if you were a criminal or a person of the sort of the less than law-abiding
classes, you'd have seen this thing, hoving, interview thinking will be fine. But I just,
as a shape and a genre, there's something about that, particularly in particularly, and there
were some obviously Australian versions of sort of GMs and Holden's and Ford's similar. But that's
why I think it's like, because I agree with everything Chris has said about this day. And
if I had to choose, if you held a gun to my head, I would say,
convertibles in the States of love. They're just, they're always happy because they hold memories
of happy stuff. And I look at my Defender, I drove the Defender with this newly applied
car and classic decals on its bronze green paintwork. Absolutely perfect. It did. I drove it on Sunday.
And that's probably my happiest car. I don't have lots of cars, but it's my haps car because
I only get in that when I'm going to do something happy. It's not a work car. It's not a commuting
car. When I saw that little notch, that Plymouth thing, I thought, this is the hardest question
in the world. Sounded good. I was in a, I was in my M5 with quite fancy intake, exhaustful having
all I could hear was that thing in my scuttle. So let's go to, oh, it was a quick cheese or
cars quiz. Who's doing that this week? Well, Neil has cuckooed himself because I'd forgotten to do it.
So Neil, should we do a test? We'll just do a little, do a little test, which is like a starter,
an appetizer for the main event, which will be Chris Cooper doing cheese and cars. I will do a
little, you know, when they bring around the thing that you haven't ordered at the beginning.
Oh, the Amoose, the Amoose Boosh. Yes. When you're post restaurant, they give you something extra
at the beginning. That's what I'm going to do. So I'm going to do three cheeses and you need to
tell me what car that cheese would be. Oh, I see. And then I'm going to do three cars and you've got
to tell me what cheese they would be. So that is how I've seen this car. This is quite complicated.
That's a different question. That's good. A strong, strong British cheddar.
Oh, God, that's good. Strong British cheddar. For me, that would be a Ford Sierra Sapphire
Cosworth 1993. Oh, wow. Wow. Because it's British, it's simple, packs a punch,
unsophisticated. It's quite ubiquitous. To most people, it's affordable.
Or many people, it's affordable. But it's not, it's not ordinary. And also,
it's a fancy version of an ordinary product. I've nailed it there. I've nailed it. I have to say,
that is very good. That's good. I like the sun, which is completely different, which I still like.
It's a Bentley. Ford Granada, gear, three-litre. Good. Okay. Pecorino.
We sent these in advance. So the other two got... No, what is that?
Fiat X19. What comes to mind when I say Pecorino cheese? What car is it? Fiat X19.
Fiat 500 Abarth 595. Zipping round Rome. Yep. And the Fiat 500 Jolly thing with
the little tassel-y things on the doors. Nice. Anything managed? X19. Fiat X19.
Oh, good. It's Pecorino. It's sharp. I like that. Last one, Fetta.
It's a Trin 2CV. I don't know why. I know. It's not Greek.
I deliberately chose Fetta because it's not so obvious.
No. Oh, what would Fetta be? I think it's a salty car.
Yes. So Fetta's got... There's no Greek cars that we can talk about, really, is there? So that's
difficult. But Fetta is, for me, it's an Alpha 4C because a lot of people don't rate it.
And as a Fetta gets a bad time, it gets a bad rep, actually, because it's sort of in salads.
But actually, it's quite joyous. And when it's used correctly, there's a real...
It's a genuine addition to it, particularly a salad. And also, it fights off the competing
noise of the uncooked bell pepper, which is one of the most evil things ever put in food.
Because the bell pepper just fucking takes over. Whatever room the bell pepper is in,
it's the loudest fucker there. And Fetta is your guardian angel. Fetta comes in and goes,
get lost, bell pepper. I'm going to be more flavoured than you. So actually, there you go.
Oh, true. I don't like Fetta. What cars don't you like?
So I think it would be those... I don't know what. I think those taxis you see in lost places,
mini cabs, which are based on a like a people carrier type hatchback thing,
which have got no ride, no wheel travel. The doors don't really open. They're very, very noisy.
And they're just disappointing and failed cars. Yep, I get that. Right, I'm going to give you
two cars and you've got to tell me the cheese. Fiat Uno Turbo. Fiat Uno Turbo. Organic Parmesan.
Oh, yes. I'd say that was probably like a small, one of those small, quite punchy
Camembert's, probably. Yeah, I think it's a chicken nugget.
Chicken nugget. Good cheese. It's not cheese. No, no, no. Last one. Ford Capri, Mark II,
3.0L S. Oh, that's premium. Driven in the professionals. That's premium.
It's a Somerset Brie. No, I'd say that was a...
It's blue. It's a Stilton that because it's pungent, it's potent. Whoever gets out of it,
it's going to reek of some two pound aftershave and it's going to have a long, long aftertaste.
It's premium though. Remember those little metal tubes you used to have?
Yeah. Those two things together went together.
Do you remember the little, forgotten that? The little pink bits inside?
The little bits in it, yeah. I don't think they were prawn. I'm reflecting. A bit suspect that
2B cheese, but it's not good. Right, there we go. There's a little starter on the cheese test.
Very good. Good, good, good. Like it. So we're going to have to get on with this,
boys, because I've got some work to do, which you won't believe me, but here we go.
We're going to miss the next one. We're going to do a two car garage straight away,
if you don't mind. So two car garage is as follows. You're 45 years old and have two children.
You're getting divorced and will look after the kids every two weeks. Rather than getting depressed,
you're spending hours on the internet looking for the cars this opportunity will allow you to indulge
in. First, a family run around for the weeks with the kids and second, a sports car for the
time when you will be single. Budget 75,000, but be careful. You cannot look desperate. I won't say
who said this, but there's a PS asking for a friend, which I thought was rather lovely suffix.
So let's start with Neil. I was given this two car garage in Monaco in walking into my hotel
from a lovely friend I know in Geneva. I won't say anything more, but he and all his colleagues
listen to our podcasts very regularly and they're lovely people. And we spent 15 minutes and my
wife's looking at me saying, do you really need to spend half an hour now talking about a two car
garage when we're supposed to be going to have a cup of coffee or something? So quite complicated
this particularly in my view. You can't look like you're trying too hard. I think to me,
it rules out Porsche and it rules out Ferrari, but you've got to do you want to do something,
you know, look, particularly if you're getting divorced and you sport, I'm doing my sporty one
first. You do want to look cool. You don't want to look desperate, but obviously, you know,
you're going to be available. You don't want to look a bit of a dick to your friends. You don't
want to look an idiot to the women. It's complicated. What cars are loved by men and women equally?
There's quite a few of those. Probably should do a podcast on that. But I'm going alpha because I
think it says enough, but it doesn't say too much. And then I'm going out for spider. And I thought
maybe the cam tail, the cam tail probably is the one because if you go the boat tail, maybe you're
trying a bit too hard on the boat tail, you know, they're 40 grand, 50 grand, you're losing all your
money. The cam tail is nine tenths of a boat tail. It's half the price in my view. So then, but if
you go red, you're trying a bit hard. So you've got to find one a bit nichey color. So I found a lovely
brown cam tail alpha 2000, which you're not going to look like always at it. You could see he's
getting divorced. He's trying to, you know, what's he up to? You're just going to look cool, aren't
you? You're just going to look cool. So we can't do all this. You know, this man's made well working
Geneva. And if you're driving around Geneva in a brown alpha 2000 cam tail with a tan root,
it just can look pretty cool. Do you think the boat or recently divorced? Do you think the alpha
spider? Do you think the alpha spider is the Pampers grass of the about to be divorced driver?
Do you know what somebody said to me? Well, my colleague said,
it's a bit like having Pampers grass in your front garden. Do you know what this is?
Yes, I do. I do. And we're not going in there now. We've got to get on with this.
So then he's this this this imaginary gentleman lives in Geneva, which only I know, of course.
So he needs a four by four. Because it snows there a lot. And he doesn't want to be the
idiot gang core, you know, because he doesn't got a full bike. Of course, the tire sounds like
given a situation, he did get caught. The tires are more important, of course, than the actual
car. But anyway, but then, you know, KN trying a bit hard, Ranger trying a bit hard, G wagon
desperately trying a bit hard, you want to be low key, you don't want to break down,
you don't want your wife screaming at you, not only you an idiot, but now you've broken down
and the kids are late for school. So you want reliability. There's only one car, Total Land Cruiser.
It's going to get you everywhere. You're going to be buried in it. It will never,
ever, ever let you down. So I think it was about 40 grand this I went via Amazon. I know Chris
is going to depress him a little bit about because we all love these cars. And I think that that
will never, ever, ever let you down. And you're not trying too hard in that car either. And I
think I've got 10 grand left where I can rent a Ferrari for a couple of weekends.
I really miss my Land Cruiser. Makes me sad that. Okay, let's go to Manish.
So I think Alpha is a very good answer in terms of style and not trying too hard, but I flipped
them round. So my family car, I found a beautiful 1983 GT V6, two and a half. Look at that.
Yes. Oh yeah, good. I think that's really stylish. I think people are going to think,
what is that car? I was 16 when that car came out. And I remember thinking, whoa, whoa,
definitely, whoa, whoa, whoa. And this thing's been rebuilt. It's 28,000 euros. It's in Poland,
49,000 kilometers. And it's got that Busso V6 engine. It just, you'll sound, you're not trying
too hard. But when you turn that ignition, I think people's heads will turn. So I think that is car
number one, car number two for me, the sports car. Again, you're absolutely right. Mustn't try too
hard. A mark that I don't think anyone would associate with trying too hard. This was another car
that turned my head, but it did it at a much earlier age. I did it when I was 11. This thing
is a 1971 Datsun 240Z in dark green. That's good. Just again, you know, somebody over there, well,
that's a Datsun. He's not trying too hard, but it's really a Ferrari, isn't it? Without being a Ferrari.
And it's 48 and a half thousand pounds. There's another one that's been rebuilt. So I think neither
of these will let you down. This is in Kent. And I pretty much am bang on budget.
Wow. I gotta say, I'm very impressed. Chris Cooper. Well, you can go, you can go two ways with this,
can't you? Particularly if you're like me dyslexic, and you read the last bit and it said your budget
is 75k and you can look desperate. Yeah, okay. So I'll give you that version first.
I think if you were looking, trying to look a bit desperate, I think the family car you'd end up with,
and this is on the auction starts in tuition car classics, you'd have a Chevy Camaro. If you were
desperate, you justify that as your family run about with your kids. Yeah, I think you'd do that.
And I think if you were on that journey, then the convertible you'd have,
the bloody thing isn't working. There is, here we go.
It's a Cadillac XLR convertible. Oh, yes. Oh, yes. I give you, they look cool. They look cool. I give
you our friends in Geneva. You could go either way, both those, but actually the ones I've chosen,
the ones I've chosen. Oh, so you've chosen six? No, I've chosen four. He's answered a different
question and chosen four. You can swing either way on this one, but let's not go back to the
Pamper's Grass. So I think the family car you'd have, and this is in the auction, I think it starts
next week. So we'll start for the week being 5th of May, and I'll pin a B7, clear glass,
that's pretty mega. But I thought about this car since I saw it in that little petrol station
on the road between Aberdeen and Braymark a couple of years ago, an SL600. It's done 55,000 miles,
auction starts middle of May, that beautiful two-tone lower plastic, darker blue upper
G1 car. Yeah. So I'll get on with this. So my first car is a Ferrari F40.
Yeah, I'm with you on that. I thought it was Chris Cooper for a minute, so I'm about to do this
sensibly. So I come back to that. My first car is an Alfa Julia Quadrifoglio because I choose one
about every three weeks. I'm obsessed with them. I'm going to have to own one soon.
And I've gone out from there. So when Neil Clifford said I've gone out from there, I went,
oh, shit, I'm going to have to re-choose as it happens to me quite a lot actually. So here we go.
But you didn't choose the Alfa as I chose. That's 45 grand. It's coming home a bit cheaper than that.
And there's a leggy 4C for sale on the Alfa. Oh, two Alphas. Now, I just, there's something about
the 4C. I know it's not brilliant. And actually, you can make them really good fun. It's a really
cool looking car. It's a great conversation point. Wherever you go, someone's going to want to talk
to you. It's not a Cayman. And do you know what? The world's better because it isn't a Cayman.
So I'm going to buy, that's 35 grand. I'm a bit over, but I think that's coming a bit cheap.
The four doors coming a bit cheap. I've got a two Alfa garage that I'm going on dating sites
straight away. Right, let's do a bit of music before we head off into this beautiful working
little cloud in the sky Bristol, by the way. Not a cloud in the sky. Neil Clifford, some music.
On the subject of F40s, we all got this, I think. Someone sent me a biscuit.
An F40 biscuit. Look at that. I think we'll have to tell people who made these biscuits. And now
I can't remember obviously. I can remember. Yes. So her name is Joanne, couture cookies.
Look at that. And she very, very kindly sent us a wonderful, but I've eaten all of mine.
I've got a Salvino bag as well.
And they are absolutely wonderful. So we'd love to sort of do something more with her and sort of
think about how we can work together. But they are, Peter Haynes was involved as well, our good friend
Peter, in putting us together. And she very kindly made these. Oh, did you say good, did you say good
friend? Well, yes, I did say that. I mean, he owes more towards friend, doesn't he? I mean,
I think the good bit. Do you know what? Do you know what? I'm not even sure friend covers it
really, does it? I think that's even that's too far. Someone we once met. Yeah. But they're
delicious cookies. Joe is wonderful artist and bless you for letting us have them.
As a present to the one you love, the idea of doing cars, your other half's car as a cookie is
I never thought it'd be cool. It's really cool. Have a look at that. Have a look at the stuff.
It's really good. We'll put a link to a website up here now.
Back to music. Sorry. I was on biscuits, favorite biscuits. We should end with maybe favorite biscuits.
Do you ever or is it just me? You get you find a song that you remember, and you play it in your
car, obviously, on your own, obviously, over and over and over again. Or is it? I always do. That's
singing along the 10th time to a song that I must be maybe slightly weird. Anyway, you're not.
The verb urban hymns. But go on. Weeping willow. It is amazing. Actually makes me even go a bit
funny just saying it. It's really fucking great. What a bloody album that is. Manish.
Um, young Mexican pianist, Gibran Alcossair. Okay. Of course. Of course.
You got with me 22, plays a piano, but composed. By the way, it's called Idea 10. It's three minutes
of absolute heaven. It's just solo piano. You'll love it. And already I feel my choice might be
stupid. Chris Cooper, you can be stupid first. Not as stupid as my choice as the permanent resident
and commander in chief of the uncool and Philistine corner of this podcast. I have chosen
from the Canon of Works this week of the 1980s pop duo, dollar. Oh, wow. They were great. No, I loved
dollar. David Van Day. When I was at school, first went to university,
all the blokes wanted to be David Van Day. They all tried that hair. They all tried that hair. I
actually, when Lin listens to this, she's going to chop something off. They were great. They were
great. I once dyed my hair, because my then girlfriend facility, we won't go there again,
said, I think you'd look better with blonde hair. You can tell it's still quite blonde now.
Great. And we all fancied to raise the bizarre. It was just the one song. I mean,
there were. The Trevor Horn era was, that's not a metaphor, amazing Trevor Horn. The one I picked,
hand held in black and white by dollar. I don't know that. In a car, go and Google it now. It's
like you said, about 10 times in a row. It's banging tune.
That's a CGI person. I was often asked, when will the podcast end? And I think
the choice of dollar as the music means that this is the last episode of this podcast.
Can you imagine Chris with that haircut? Oh, I love it.
I'm going to go. Radiohead, obviously, is arguing with the best long distance band,
because you can really get into an album and you can go to some of their weird stuff,
and they'll just be like a squawking ape for about two minutes. And then you realize that
he's deployed it perfectly and it sounds right. And then you go back and play it again and at
about God knows what time in the morning. I was listening to Morning Mr. Magpie by Radiohead. Go
back and listen to that as a tune. It's absolutely bizarre, but it's freaking brilliant. So yeah,
it's a bit obvious to go back to that. There's no more housekeeping. The 23rd of May is the great
British Jaguar day. There's lots of stuff being organized. We'll keep you up to date through social
media, but come along. It really will be good fun. I'm going to stop begging and pushing people
towards the event, but numbers are growing and we're very proud of what we put together,
so we can't wait to see you at that. Any other housekeeping? I'm sure Mr. Cooper wants to add
something. No, I think that's enough for today. Okay, right. Have a great weekend, everyone.
Enjoy the sunshine if you happen here and go out in your motor cars or your motorcycles. Bye-bye.
About this episode
The conversation moves from Monaco Historic F1 and classic-car spotting into a broader debate about what makes a car genre special. The hosts weigh vintage appeal against modern reliability, then each lands on different favorites: wedge cars, four-seat cabriolets, estate cars, and low-key family choices like the Land Cruiser. Along the way, they dig into body shapes, nostalgia, and the idea that age changes what feels desirable.
