Touring car racing uses cars that are related to normal road cars. The hosts are talking about what 1990s road car would be a good starting point for a racing team.
They’re talking about the rules for the BTCC, which is a UK touring car racing series. Those rules decide what cars can race and what safety/changes are allowed. So the question is whether the Saab could be entered legally.
They mention that in the mid-1990s, a Saab 9-5 Aero was used as the official car for parade laps. Parade laps are more about display and ceremony than racing. The “Aero” part usually means it’s the sportier version of that Saab model.
“Saab GB” refers to Saab’s UK organization, which provided the car for BTCC parade laps. Manufacturer national branches often handle logistics like supplying vehicles for events and marketing. The hosts joke about whether the car came from the UK office versus another country’s Saab operation.
“Left-hand drive” means the steering wheel is on the left side of the car. The speaker is asking why that setup matters for the situation they’re discussing.
They’re talking about an event at Silverstone, which is a well-known race track in the UK. The speaker is saying their birthday lined up with that track day.
“Space saver wheels” are compact spare wheels/tires designed to be lightweight and take up less room. Because they’re smaller and often have different tire construction and tread, they can change traction and stability—especially noticeable during aggressive driving like drifting.
They’re talking about a Saab 9-3 convertible. It had four spare-style wheels on it, which usually aren’t meant for normal driving, so the car would feel different and be easier to slide.
They’re describing that Saab and the drivers planned things ahead of time. The point is that the setup (including the unusual wheels) wasn’t accidental—it was arranged.
A “four-wheel drift” means the car is sliding so that more than just the back end is losing grip. It usually takes the right tires and setup, which is why the space-saver wheels matter.
Term
swingy booms
“Booms” are arms that move—often using hydraulics. If they’re “swingy,” they pivot to reach where they need to go. That movement is important because it determines how the machine works in the field.
Term
portal axle fluid drive
A portal axle is a special axle design that raises the wheels higher off the ground. That helps a vehicle clear ruts, rocks, and uneven terrain. The host is joking about it sounding like it “drives” with fluid, but the main point is the axle design.
Concept
slur into gear
Some vehicles don’t shift with a sharp click—they engage more smoothly. That can make the drivetrain sound like it’s “slurring” into the next gear. It’s a clue about how the transmission or driveline is designed.
Concept
chest freezer
A chest freezer is a big freezer you open from the top. People use it to store lots of frozen food, and the joke here is about not having space for it.
Garage flooring is what you put on the floor of your garage. Better flooring can make it easier to clean and helps protect the concrete from stains and damage.
Duramat makes garage floor products, like tiles you can install yourself. The point they’re making is that it can make a garage floor look nicer and be customized.
These are separate floor pieces that you lay down like a puzzle. People like them because they’re usually easier to install than a full coating and you can pick the look.
“Space Wagon” sounds like a nickname or a made-up name for a vehicle. In the podcast context, it’s mentioned alongside practical items like cleaning and a fire extinguisher, suggesting it’s being used as a playful reference rather than a specific real-world model.
“psi” is just a way of measuring how much air pressure is in the tire. The amount of air changes how the tire feels and how well it sticks to the ground.
Tire pressure changes how the tire behaves. More air usually makes it feel firmer and faster, while less air can feel grippier and more comfortable but can be less stable.
A hang glider is like a lightweight flying wing you steer by moving your body. If it’s homemade, it may not be built to the same safety standards as commercial ones.
Concept
micro dose GLP one
GLP-1 is a type of medicine that can help you feel less hungry and support weight loss. “Micro dose” usually means starting with a smaller amount first.
An exploded diagram is a picture where the parts are pulled apart so you can see how everything goes together. It’s useful when you’re trying to understand or repair a mechanical system.
Suspension is what helps the tires stay in contact with the road. In Formula One, the suspension is tuned very precisely so the car grips well and handles predictably.
The rear axle is the part that helps drive the rear wheels. It also helps support the back of the car, so it can affect traction and stability.
Concept
micro light
A microlight is a very small airplane. In this conversation it’s just part of a hypothetical scenario, not something related to car parts or driving.
Car
Honda Goldwing
Honda’s Gold Wing is a touring motorcycle that’s built for long rides. The hosts are talking about how the handlebars and riding position can feel different depending on how the bike is set up.
A flat-six engine is a type of engine where the cylinders are laid out flat, like two banks facing opposite directions. People like it because it can run smoothly and sit lower in the vehicle, but putting one into a car takes a lot of design work.
A “salvage” vehicle is one that was badly damaged and written off, then sold to be fixed or used for parts. If you’re buying one, you want to be sure it was repaired properly and that the title/history is clear.
Broken Wings is a UK shop that focuses on damaged Honda Gold Wing bikes. They’re the kind of specialist business you’d look up when searching for salvage bikes.
An MOT is a UK vehicle safety check done once a year. If it’s an “MOT failure,” the vehicle didn’t pass, so it likely needs repairs before it can be legally driven.
“Unfinished projects” are vehicles that have been partially repaired, modified, or restored but not completed. For buyers, this often means missing parts, incomplete wiring/mechanical work, and unknown quality of prior repairs.
An insurance write-off is when an insurance company decides a vehicle is too badly damaged to fix for a normal repair. Those cars can end up being repaired later or sold off, and they often have paperwork/road-legal status to consider.
The Hillman Imp is an old British car. The hosts are talking about putting a different engine into it—basically turning it into a custom project.
Car
Citroen Picasso
A Citroën Picasso is a family car/van-style vehicle (an MPV). Here it’s just being referenced as part of the story—what car he was linked to during the incident.
Car
moped
A moped is like a small scooter with a motor, usually meant for short trips and lower speeds than a motorcycle. The episode is using it to describe who Ronnie Pickering was arguing with.
Concept
eBay'd for charity
“eBay’d for charity” means the car was sold through an online auction, and the money was meant for a good cause. If you ever buy something like that, you usually want to be extra careful about checking the car’s condition and documents.
“Pre-bids” are early bids you can place before the auction officially starts. It’s a way to show you’re interested and potentially get the bidding moving. The speaker is saying the car is already available for early offers.
The speaker mentions the “Shelby Super Snake Mustang,” which is a high-performance variant associated with Shelby American. It’s known as a more extreme, power-focused take on the Ford Mustang, often tied to big engine upgrades and aggressive tuning. In the context of the auction, it’s being used as a comparison point for the car they found.
Concept
jammed open throttle
“Jammed open throttle” means the gas pedal/throttle can’t close, so the engine keeps getting lots of air. That can make the car accelerate when you don’t want it to. It’s basically a worst-case scenario the speaker is joking about.
Pop-up lights are headlights that hide in the car’s body and then pop out when you turn them on. They look cool and very “80s,” but they have moving parts that can wear out over time.
Digital instruments are the gauge cluster displays that use electronic screens instead of purely analog dials. In the 1980s, this was a big design and technology statement, and it’s part of why the car feels so “of the era.” Depending on the specific cluster, digital systems can be sensitive to aging electronics.
A 1984 Corvette C4 is a specific generation of the Corvette made by Chevrolet. “C4” is just the code for that generation. People like it because it looks very 1980s and has a classic Corvette vibe.
Service history is the paperwork trail of oil changes, repairs, and inspections. When it’s “extensive,” it usually means the previous owner kept up with maintenance, which makes the car less of a mystery.
Concept
COVID purchase
“COVID purchase” means the car was bought around the pandemic. Some people drove less or stored cars more, so even if the miles are low, you still want to check that maintenance was actually done.
Alloys are fancy wheels made from metal instead of plain steel. The “16-inch” part is the wheel diameter, which changes how the car rides and how the tires look.
A “kit replica” is a car that’s made to resemble something famous, using parts from a kit. The big thing to check is how close it is to the original and what it’s actually built on.
“Canite Rider” is the company named as making the replica. When you’re buying something like this, the maker can tell you whether the build quality and details are likely to be good.
A “small block Chevrolet” is a popular Chevy V8 engine family. “5.7” usually points to the common 350 V8 size, which is known for being easy to find parts for and build.
“Bare metal restoration” means they took the car down to the metal shell before repainting it. That usually indicates more serious prep work, like fixing rust properly.
These are tires with white lettering on the side. It’s a style choice that makes the car look more classic and “period-correct.”
Term
turbo vac
“Turbo vac” sounds like a name for the wheels or a specific look on the van. In this context, it’s probably not about the engine—it’s more about the styling.
Deep dish rims are wheels that look more “inward” or scooped. People like them because they change the car’s look and stance.
Concept
mem memorabilia, including a handgun
They say the sale includes memorabilia, even a handgun. The important question is whether it’s a real, legal firearm or just a prop tied to the theme.
Term
three spoke wooden chrome stereo
They’re describing the car’s old-school music system. It’s probably a vintage-looking stereo with wood and shiny chrome trim, which some people think looks really cool in an older car.
They’re talking about a big engine: a V8 that’s about 5 liters. “V8” means eight cylinders, and “five litre” is the engine’s size—bigger engines usually feel strong and smooth, even if they don’t make huge horsepower by today’s standards.
That’s another way of saying engine size. “305 cubic inches” is roughly a 5-liter V8, and it’s a common classic-engine spec people use to compare how strong the car should feel.
It means the car has an automatic transmission with only three forward gears. That usually makes the car feel easy and smooth, especially at low speeds, but it may not be as quick or efficient as newer transmissions.
A roof spoiler is a small wing-like piece on the back of the roof. It’s mostly there to change the car’s look, and sometimes to help the airflow around the back of the car.
Flared arches are widened wheel-arch panels that cover more tire. They’re often used to fit wider tires and to give a more aggressive, classic muscle or rally-inspired stance.
Wheelbase is the spacing between the front and rear wheels. If it looks too long, the car can look stretched, and that can also change how it feels on the road.
Rake is how the car sits—whether the front is higher or lower than the back. People use it to make the car look more aggressive or “ready to go,” especially in hot-rod styles.
“A-team Hire” sounds like a company that rents the A-Team-style van for people who want to use it for something. It’s a reminder that you can experience the vibe without buying the vehicle.
An “ex-hire vehicle” is one that used to be rented out or used by a rental company. Because lots of different people drive it, it may have more wear, so it’s smart to check service history and inspect it closely.
The Dodge Viper is a sports car built to be very fast and exciting to drive. The podcast brings it up because someone was considering it while looking at vehicles at an auction.
They’re saying that a big American truck can be awkward in the UK—harder to park and not always a good fit for the roads. They also mention that the look (like chrome) can make it feel dated or silly.
They’re talking about a Chevrolet Impala in the “SS” performance trim. It’s basically the sportier version of that model.
Concept
mismatched listing details (rent vs for sale photos)
This segment highlights a verification problem: when a car listing for “rent” and a listing for “for sale” show different engine photos, it suggests the listings may not refer to the same vehicle. For buyers and renters, photo mismatches are a practical warning sign that you should request VIN/registration details, confirm the exact car, and do a pre-agreement check. It’s essentially a “don’t trust the ad—verify the specific car” lesson.
They mention “rush hour” to explain the timing—this car was spotted in heavy traffic. It’s just context for the story.
Concept
time travel
They’re joking about a time traveler coming back to drive an old car. It’s basically a fun way to talk about how some cars look and feel like they belong to a certain decade.
LIVE
A Better Help ad.
Hold on.
One second.
Mommy!
I just need to...
What if you had a room where no one interrupts?
No notifications, no expectations.
Just space to talk.
With Better Help, therapy happens in a space that's yours.
Visit BetterHELP.com slash random podcast for 10% off your first month of online therapy.
This is a Monday.com ad, the same Monday.com designed for every team.
The same Monday.com with built-in AI, scaling your work from day one.
The same Monday.com with an easy and intuitive setup.
Go to Monday.com and try it for free.
Have you ever been stuck on a weight loss plateau, trying everything and anything you
can to lose that extra weight and reach peak health?
We've all been there.
But Noom's unlocked a secret to reaching the mountaintop.
Go in micro.
The Noom GLP-1 microdose program starts at $99 and is delivered to your door in 7 days.
Start your microdose GLP-1 journey today at Noom.com.
That's N-O-O-M dot com.
Noom.
Micro changes.
Big results.
Noom GLP-1 RX program involves healthy diet, exercise, and support.
Individual results may vary.
Meds and personalization based on clinical need.
Not reviewed by FDA for safety, efficacy, or quality.
No affiliation with Novo Nordisk Inc.
The only US source of FDA-approved semi-glutide.
Not available in all 50 US states.
I'm Jonny Smith.
I'm your reporter.
And this is Smith & Sniff, a podcast on which two friends talk about cars and many other
things.
Right.
Guys.
Right.
Listen.
Look.
Here's the situation.
When I say, look, I mean, you can look now.
This is it, Richard.
This is happening right, right this minute as I sit here in my little chair, in my little
corner of my little section of a room that's not, not that little, but it's a small corner
of it.
Um, we're making videos.
What are we doing?
I still don't know.
But here we are.
Dear listener, if you are listening, you won't know this, but this episode for the first
time is also a video episode.
Yeah.
Because apparently podcasts have to be video now.
So here we are.
If you are watching this on YouTube or another platform, um, hi.
Yeah.
Hi, everybody.
Thanks for watching.
Uh, but yeah, from now on, hopefully, impending technical difficulties, we will do this as
a video podcast as well as an audio one.
But um, we have made a solemn vow not to be one of those podcasts that starts chatting
about things that you can see, because that's deeply annoying for audio listeners.
And as someone who listens to podcasts while in the car or walking the dog primarily, I
hate people who don't tell us what they're looking at on podcasts.
So we're going to try and not do that, but, uh, but we are going to be video for now.
So that's nice.
Well, yeah.
But like if you, let's just rewind a little bit.
Let's just like reflect, Richard.
We was doing videos many years ago before possibly the people what are doing videos
now would doing videos before, because we started off, yes, this was a video format
before it was a podcasting format, uh, wasn't it?
Why, why, why did you do a Matt Berry, Randy?
I don't know.
But casting for Matt, I don't know why I did that.
But thinking back to when we used to do the, the Bulldog services, driving around, rigging
up silly cameras and very appalling quality microphones in cars, although it was really
enjoyable and it was crucially a hobby.
It was something we just wanted to do for, for Lolls, wasn't it?
We didn't, we weren't doing it for the Gram, Richard.
We're doing it for, for personal Lolls, uh, not gains.
We, um, we, we, that was the Pesh mode with personal Lolls.
Yes, your own personal Loll.
I told you this before, haven't I?
Genuinely, for when the, the whole Loll thing started being used liberally, I think it took
me three years before I was brave enough to ask someone what it meant.
Oh, I just didn't know.
I always think that it is a sign of getting old or personally, for me, it's a real indicator
of getting old.
How often I have to go to urban dictionary and look something up because I have simply
no idea what it means.
Yeah.
Um, but anyway, that's, that's fine.
Uh, look, I wanted to, before I forget, read out an email we've had from a listener, uh,
which is a reaction to something we talked about on, uh, an Otisot couple of weeks ago,
I think we were talking about, uh, uh, touring cars and what nineties car we would use if
we had to set up a touring car team in the nineties and you, uh, said perhaps a Saab
Cabrio, if we could get away with it.
Yeah.
We weren't sure if it fitted the rules.
Well, uh, someone's been in touch to, uh, to clarify this, uh, that person is in fact
missed touring cars himself.
Alan Gow, the chief executive of the BTCC is, is, is, is a listener.
The Gow.
Um, he says good day both.
He's Australian in case people don't know.
So he's allowed to say that.
Good day, Alan.
Uh, good day, Alan.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Uh, he says, as you may have guessed, a Saab 93 hero convertible would not have complied
with a multitude of BTC regulations.
In fact, I can hardly think of any regulations that it would have complied with, but, but
I love the imagery you concocted.
As an aside, for a few years in the mid nineties, we used a Saab 95 aero as the official car
of the BTCC for parade laps, et cetera.
Oh, courtesy of Saab GB.
Fantastic.
It would have been weird if it was Saab Germany that supplied it, but yeah.
Brilliant.
Yes.
And the people from Saab GB going, where did they get that from?
Why is it left hand drive?
What's going on?
You're British as fans.
It made it look stupid.
Anyway, uh, Alan continues.
It was a great car at the time, but thank God it wasn't a 93 convertible.
Let me explain.
Our Silverstone event one year happened to coincide with my birthday.
So unbeknown to me, some of my staff decided to have a bit of their own sport in inverted
commas. The female VIP passenger that I was asked to take around for a few laps immediately
before the race was supposedly a TV soap star and rather buxom, not being a soap aficionado.
I had no clue who it was meant to be, but she was supposedly of such importance that the BBC
had their cameraman in the backseat to record it all.
And off we went on the laps.
Right.
Almost immediately she started to complain that it was too hot in the car and began
disrobing very completely and very quickly.
Completely.
Yes, she was a stripper.
Anyone in the grandstands who was looking into the car as it went around would have
witnessed the carry-on, the flurry of me knee-steering the car while trying to get her covered up
before the crowd could see it, all the while sloudly swearing in a most fruity and Australian
manner at my staff for fixing me up. The cameraman thoroughly enjoyed himself,
but the footage is now safely locked away deep in the BBC archives.
So that's why I'm glad it wasn't a Saab convertible.
Although a few rounds later I did have to use a Saab convertible because while I was tied up in
a 93 convertible fitted with four space saver wheels.
What?
A clever bit of pre-planning between Saab and some of the drivers led by John Clelland
who was always the main mischief maker.
Naughty Clelland.
Naughty Clelland.
Alan concludes by saying I must admit that the car on those space savers did beautiful
four-wheel drifts around brands that day.
I bet it did actually.
Yeah.
He concludes by saying keep up the great work.
You are by a long way my dog walking podcast of choice.
So Alan, thank you.
You're a legend.
Well, yeah, we are not worthy in the words of Wayne's world.
Thank you very much for sending that to us.
That's brilliant.
Now you got me thinking about if you were following a Saab or any car on a pair of or
all four space savers, they look a lot like those crop spraying adapted tractors
that aren't really tractors that sit very, very high and have a very wide gate.
If you were a runner, you'd refer to it as a gate.
Would you?
Would you?
You know what I mean?
I think so.
Spelt G-A-I-T, not the swinging gate.
They almost look like the kind of, I don't know, the automotive praying mantis.
There's a bit of a praying mantis about them because they've got these swingy booms and
big like a tank full of, I don't know, poison in the back or whatever it is.
I like those though because they're like portal axle fluid drive.
So you can hear that they kind of slur into gear.
Yeah, they're quite nice the way they slur into gear.
You can hear them.
The farm where the Lake Brake Show is based, they've got one.
I always enjoy watching it as it's being brought out.
In fact, it came out last week, I think, because it's time of year, Rich.
You know, swear crops are coming on.
They're bringing the crops on.
Yeah.
Is that what they say?
Bringing them on?
Yeah, they're bringing them on.
Yeah.
It's sowing.
That's what I say a little bit.
Yeah, they've already sown.
They're now bringing them on.
It's like it's like a football hooligans goading one another.
Come and have it.
It's basically come and have a go if you think you're hard enough.
They do that to the crops, but with...
Come and have a grow if you think you're hard.
Come and have a grow if you think you're hard.
Exactly that.
And the crops go, all right, I will then.
You go, go on.
Go on.
Prove it.
Okay, I will.
I'm going to grow taller.
Become taller.
Barley, you dickhead.
Is it like far, far?
What is that, a farm chanter?
You'll have loads of footy hooligans stood politely
around the edge of the setter side in the field,
pointing to the middle, going,
oh, I, yeah, oh, I, yeah, come and have a go.
And before you know it, it's grown an inch in 24 hours.
But they do say that talking to plants helps them to thrive,
don't they?
Yeah.
This is a sort of a thing.
I've never found out if it's actual just
hooey or if it's true.
Well, no, and I remember reading a magazine article
where now King was Prince Charles.
Oh, yes.
Because he's obviously very passionate about horticulture.
I think he used to play classic FM to his.
And can I just say that sometimes I do listen to classic FM,
rarely, but whenever I do and I'm driving,
I always feel like somebody's behind me music scoring my life.
And I kind of like it.
Kind of like it.
Yeah.
There's a power about.
Classic FM, now it just reminds me of the old barber
that I used to go to in London who was absolutely crackers.
And he always had classic FM on.
Did he?
And so, yeah.
And so I sort of associate it with, he was,
he was one of those barbers who he didn't talk a lot,
but he would just suddenly say something completely nuts.
And he, he was the one.
Have I told you about this?
He was the one who, at one point he just started,
he's just started telling me that I should get a chest freezer.
And I said, I haven't really got room in my house for a chest freezer.
And he was a chest freezer.
But there was, bear in mind, there was no context to this.
It was like, he's there.
Classic FM's playing quite quietly.
There's no one else in his barber shop.
Yeah.
He's cutting my hair.
Yeah.
In silence.
And then he just suddenly went, have you got a chest freezer?
And I went, no, I haven't.
He went, you should get one.
And I was like, I haven't really got room in my house for one.
He went, no, it'd be fine.
Have you got a chest freezer?
That's a bit kiddampy.
I know.
It's like, where did that come from?
He then told me that he's got one and he just has it in his sitting room.
So he's like, I mean, honestly, it gave good haircuts,
but he was absolutely crackers.
He once told me that after the Grenfell fire,
that they were just going to ban tower blocks.
What?
You know, when someone's just sort of general thought processes
and opinions are so nutty that you can't,
I just can't engage with this because it's not going to go anywhere.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's like trying to eat a cloud or something.
It's never going to work.
So, but I sort of, I did kind of cautiously go,
I'm not sure they could ban tower blocks.
There's just too many of them.
You went, yeah, they're going to have to ban them.
Too dangerous.
Oh gosh.
Hang on.
I'm going to look in my notes.
I, yeah, here we go.
I used to write down the incredibly mad things.
What, that your Barbie used to say?
Can I just clarify?
Did you say he has a chest freezer in his lounge,
basically his lounge?
Yes.
I've written here in my notes.
That's not a good look, is it?
I've written in my notes.
Out of nowhere, he asks me if I have a chest freezer.
And when I said I'd have nowhere to put it,
he said he keeps his in the sitting room.
That's the talk of a murderer.
That is the talk of somebody that kills.
Come on.
Come on.
Goodness me.
He, in October 2018, I've written the text down with this.
In October 2018, he suddenly stopped cutting my hair,
walked over to the door of the shop, opened it,
looked up and down the street,
and then came back and said,
it's muggy and kept cutting my hair.
He's such a random man.
Oh, I need to meet him.
I don't know if he's still there.
It isn't near my old house,
but he, on another occasion, he got me to sat down,
sit down, he put the towel and all the gubbins around my neck.
He started cutting my hair,
and then suddenly he went into the back
and made himself a cup of tea.
What? Half-eaten through a haircut?
Well, yeah.
The haircut commenced,
but clearly his need for a cup of tea was...
Was greater than your hair.
Again, out of nowhere,
he told me that he lent a friend of his sat-nav.
His friend now denies that this happened,
so now he doesn't have a sat-nav.
I just...
Just for context, there's a sort of...
This guy also had this kind of like...
This is...
This sense that he could lose his shit at any time,
like this simmering undercurrents of anger,
which made these anecdotes and things slightly frightening.
For me, that sort of person who probably gets edgy very quickly
and annoyed about little things,
I feel they shouldn't live in a busy capital city.
They should live somewhere where everything's quite slow
and relaxed, and it's easy to digest the pace and things going on.
And he'd probably find very minor things to get annoyed about.
For example, this morning,
I wheeled out my wheelie bin to the bottom of the drive,
and a wheelie bin makes quite a loud noise.
It's like dragging a trolleyjack across a bare concrete floor.
It's awful.
But the neighbors might have woken up.
It was, what, quarter to eight?
I don't know if that's too early for a wheelie bin.
I'm really not sure on the rules.
I often do it late at night,
and then my security light comes on.
And if it's raining, it feels quite atmospheric.
I feel like there could be a Jan Hammer music score to that.
And if I look up at the sky,
it's expecting to see the bat symbol appear.
And I sometimes look at my watch as if someone's filming me
or reaching to my pocket and check that I've got my car key,
as if I'm prepared to start my mission,
which always starts with putting the bins out.
They tend to edit those bits out of James Bond films, don't they?
Bond puts the bins out before he goes on a mission
to save the world.
But would you accept a Jan Lammers soundtrack?
I'd love the, so that would be amazing.
So I'm sorry, I can't really play an instrument,
but I don't find, just have a go, Jan.
It's okay, just have a go.
Again, a retired touring car legend, right?
We should get the Crockett's theme according to Jan Lammers.
Just see what his interpretation of it is.
No musical ability at all.
He's an excellent racing driver,
but yeah, he's just plinking away on an old Casio keyboard
doing his best.
Yeah.
Now, speaking, sort of, of musicians.
Major news.
In the last week, I'll read you the start of this story from BBC News.
A record number of British performers
are to be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame this year,
including Oasis, Heavy Metal Legends Iron Maiden, and Shade.
No, I was going to talk to you about Iron Maiden, actually, today.
Oh, well, yeah.
Let me tell you, now this is confusing, because the people
who are being inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame,
you have to have been, it has to be at least 25 years
since your first commercial release for you to be eligible
to go into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.
Is that one of the criteria?
I never knew that.
Yeah, no, I didn't know that either.
I thought it was just quite arbitrary.
Yeah.
And so the 2026 inductees are Phil Collins.
No, I thought he would have been in there already, because...
What? I was going to say, I thought he would have been in there long ago.
He was inducted in 2010 as a member of Genesis,
but this is his solo work.
It's just Americans really like Phil Collins, don't they?
So I thought he'd have been in there for ages,
because this is an American thing.
Yeah.
Another surprise, Billy Idol.
Again, I thought Americans liked him,
and they'd have put him in their ages, but no.
Yeah, Billy should have been in there, I think,
just for eyes without a face, really.
Also, this year, they're putting Joy Division and New Order in,
which, again, it's like about time.
Yeah.
Oasis, Luther Van Dros, Wu Tang Clan, and Shade.
Wow, what a mix.
Luther, bless him.
I mean...
It's what a mix.
A good year for British musicians, because a lot of those are from this country.
Yeah.
But yeah, again, it's like Shade, only just putting Shade in.
Feels about time.
I think so, because Shade's never really gone out of fashion.
Shade dominates all relaxed music genres,
wherever they might be played, to whatever age crowd.
Yes.
We do need to find out the truth about her rotary entrusts,
but talking of Iron Maiden, I actually did something different.
I brushed my teeth this morning whilst watching Iron Maiden.
Normally, it's only an evening thing.
It's normally the evening brush that I select for Iron Maiden-related visuals stimulus.
So, ask me what I watched with Iron Maiden Live this morning, Richard.
Johnny, what did you watch with Iron Maiden Live this morning?
Thanks for asking.
I watched Iron Maiden Live on German television in 1987, playing their hit Wasted Years.
And this one was interesting, because a lot of people thought this footage was lost,
and they were dicking around, because I think they had to mime this song, and Maiden don't do miming.
So, they decided in minor protest to play one another's instruments and start being silly.
Yes.
And I think at one point, the drummer just got up and just kind of walked to the other side of the stage.
Perhaps he's related to my old barber.
Yeah, well.
He just walked to the door to have a look outside to see if it's muggy.
But the thing that concerned me the most about this live on German television in 1987 video
was the fact that, how do we say?
Bruce Dickinson's upper outfit was, you know those waistcoats that they wear in professional snooker?
Yes.
It's, it looked like one of those that had kind of burst open at the front.
But then as he turned around, I realized it was more of a wrestling singlet,
but it was cut in a very different way.
And it was a garment that I think less than 1% of men could carry off.
I'm convinced of it.
And was he carrying it off?
He was absolutely carrying off.
Of course he was.
Of course he was carrying off.
In 1987, Bruce Dickinson also extremely quite buff.
Not that he's like wasting away now or anything like that, but he, you know, 87,
quite a long time ago.
So I enjoyed this one.
And I'll share this link if anyone else wants to brush their teeth to it in our Patreon,
if you want to.
But yeah, it's quite a good one.
I think it's about three minutes 50.
So it gives you a chance to do everything that you need to do with your teeth.
It's just, you just reminded me of that clip I sent to you a few months ago of Jennifer Rush,
the Canadian singeress miming to one of her hits on Pebble Mill at One.
Outside my old office, in fact, at BBC Birmingham, but she sort of,
it sort of looks like she's been locked outside because she's kind of rolling down the windows,
but on the outside, not the, in the studio.
Yeah.
And doesn't she walk down some shallow steps?
She does.
Quite theatrically.
Yeah.
She does.
She, oh, she puts on a performance.
It's really impressive.
Yeah.
I'll stick the link up somewhere or other, but yeah.
No, she really puts her back into it, but it's also, I know those steps.
They were, they were sort of my polished concrete or even maybe marble, but
polished concrete.
They were officially closed off to employees who worked at Pebble Mill when I was there,
because they were prone to becoming very slippery.
Oh, were they?
It was wet.
So Jennifer Rush was taking her life into her own hands.
Wasn't she wearing stilettos?
Yeah, she's wearing stilettos and she's doing it in a really theatrical way as well.
But, you know, fair play to her.
She's a pro.
She didn't fall over and crack her spine whilst singing Ring of Ice or miming to it.
Ring of Ice?
Is that, is that a real song?
Yeah, is it?
Ring of Ice.
Okay.
By Jennifer Rush.
I just thought you made that up.
That's a known Jennifer Rush hit.
Okay.
She's generally just power of love, lady, isn't she?
But, but she did do other stuff.
Johnny, did you know the ancient Egyptians considered having a rough, unattractive
garage floor to be a mark of great shame?
Is that true?
No.
Well, did you know that Duramat garage flooring is the simple way to make your
garage floor look great?
The tiles are incredibly easy to fit yourself, they come in a huge range of colors,
and they can be etched printed with any logo or design you like.
And did you also know that the Smith and Sniff listeners,
they can get 10% off any order of Duramat garage flooring by going to duramat.co.uk
and simply using the code SSG10 at the checkout.
Is that true?
Yes.
What if you're an ancient Egyptian?
An ancient Egyptian with the internet.
It was a very advanced society.
But hang on, they didn't have cars.
So why would an ancient Egyptian have a garage?
To have somewhere to put their chest freezer.
This podcast is proudly sponsored by Duramat garage flooring.
The other week, everyone was talking about this shuttle launch
going and going into the moon.
Not into the moon, going to the moon.
Is it Artemis?
Is that the name of it?
Artemis, yes.
The aftershave.
That's right.
It does sound like an aftershave, doesn't it?
It was an aftershave.
Artemis was an aftershave, wasn't it?
It was, was it?
I think so.
Well, which came first?
I'm going to say that they're both named after,
like you said, Greek goddess or something, isn't it, Artemis?
Is it a god or a goddess?
Yeah, she was the Greek goddess of hunting the wilderness, wild animals, transitions.
A goddess of nature, vegetation, childbirth, care of children and chastity.
She's taken on too much.
Yeah, there's a lot of responsibility there, isn't it?
But also utterly unconnected things, hunting but also the care of children.
What would you be?
And saucepans and wistfulness and inert gases.
Look, you're taking on too much, Artemis.
I'd be the tender of garden-grown crops, but also keeping chariots and cars clean.
And fire extinguisher.
I'd always check the pressure of fire extinguishers or parts.
You know the little gauge on the top?
I'd always have a quick eyeball of that and go, that looks a bit low.
I don't want to get rid of that one.
Yeah.
So, Artemis, I didn't watch any of it, full disclosure, because I'm not interested.
But lots of people were, and I think, do you know what I think it needed?
A more Iron Maiden soundtrack.
Well, actually, that would have been good.
That's not what I was getting to.
I feel like the Artemis launch, you know, obviously it takes a long time and a huge
amount of prep to get to the point where you know you're definitely going to press the button
and they're going to launch conditions, engineering checks, safety, blah, blah, blah, blah.
I feel like amongst all of this prep, the Artemis launch is about to go ahead and it's all fine.
But no-name-full suspension mountain bike appears to just weave through all the security
on the back wheel.
Yeah.
On the back wheel, and he's singing or whistling, he just effortlessly does it.
Shirtless?
Of course he's shirtless with his combats on.
The combats got a shitload of oil on the chain leg.
Ironically, not from the chain of his bike, which hasn't been oiled since Tony Blair was in power.
Yeah, I think he walked past some grease or something on the narrowboat and just wiped
onto his leg.
So yeah, he's squealing by on the no-name-full suspension mountain bike with a very kind of
smeary 12 psi on the back tire and manages to go out like airside as the rocket's about to,
the shuttle's about to kick off.
There's loads of people running after him or shouting that they're going to shoot,
but because he weaves at such an acute angle on the back wheel,
there's no point in trying to fire and they can't fire and they can't abort because it's like,
they've counted down.
It's like three now, two, one, no-name-full suspension mountain bike guy comes in
and all he keeps shouting to people who are shouting to him is,
give us a light.
Give us a light.
Are you saying that he's ridden to the base of an about-to-launch rocket just to
fight a cigarette off the engines?
Yeah, he thinks it's possible and he's rolled a real nice chubby smoke and he just wants to
get a light and he's just weaving in there.
I think he'd be very hard for the security people to shoot because he's such an incredibly thin man.
He doesn't present a large target area.
He's so thin that despite him being topless, he's actually not entirely topless.
He's got a high of his vest on, but because it's flailing, it looks like a flag in severe wind.
It's almost pointed behind him.
Right.
And so he's not making any effort to sneak in, is he?
He's wearing high of his.
No, he's brazen is what he is.
And that's what the guy's and he inadvertently becomes an American hero.
Even though he's from a provincial British town where he lives on a canal boat.
I mean, the whole question of how he got to the US is an interesting one and he got there,
I suppose the first thing he had to do is source an unbrowned but full suspension mountain bike
of a suitable spec.
He got he got he they sort of got arrested a little bit, but then released immediately when
they realized he wasn't a threat and became a local hero.
So all the news vans that were there wanted to talk to him.
And he said, I've only just arrived in America, but I didn't fly because I don't trust commercial
airlines.
I got here on a combination of trawler boats and also a homemade hang glider.
It's taken me weeks.
Have you ever been stuck on a weight loss plateau trying everything and anything you
can to lose that extra weight and reach peak health?
We've all been there.
But nooms unlocked a secret to reaching the mountaintop.
Go in micro.
The Noom GLP one micro dose program starts at $99 and is delivered to your door in seven days.
Start your micro dose GLP one journey today at noom.com.
That's N O O M dot com.
Noom micro changes, big results.
Noom GLP one RX program involves healthy diet, exercise and support.
Individual results may vary.
Meds and personalization based on clinical need.
Not reviewed by FDA for safety, efficacy or quality.
No affiliation with Novo Nordisk Inc.
The only US source of FDA approved semi-glutide, not available in all 50 US states.
Leadership used to mean having all the answers, but today's best leaders embody a more human
approach.
I'm Jack Myers.
And I'm Tim Spangler.
Tim and I have spent our careers inside media, marketing and culture.
And we partnered with the ACAST Creator Network to start Lead Human to answer one simple question.
What does it really look like to lead in this AI dominated world?
The biggest tip for being a creator, it's a job.
What I learned from Michael Jackson, here's a man who understands precision.
It's about answering the questions that are hard, not about answering a bunch of teed up
questions that are fake.
What we're looking for are real stories and practical advice that you can use with your
teams right away.
Subscribe to Lead Human with Jack Myers and Tim Spangler wherever you get your podcasts.
Did I tell you about that guy who cut my hair?
Not the crazy one with the chest freezer in his room, but a guy who cut my hair who very
casually told me that he used to be in prison.
And the reason that he'd been in prison is that he used to smuggle drugs from the Netherlands
into the UK.
What?
And?
Where'd you get your haircut?
I know.
I just...
How?
Just like that.
How does this hammer happen?
I don't know.
I don't know.
I seem to somehow attract nutty hairdressers, but because actually someone else used to
cut my hair.
I subsequently found out she went and joined a cult.
So it's...
You're joking.
Are you bloody joking?
What?
Richard?
I know.
Anyway, so this guy who'd been in prison, he told me he used to smuggle drugs and the
way that he sometimes would do it from the Netherlands by his own, across the North
Sea, is...
It was basically in a microlight.
Oh, wow.
And he would fly incredibly low to avoid detection.
Yeah.
And I said, how low?
And he said, well, if the sea was choppy, I'd get splashed.
That's...
And he was telling a story and I went, but you landed safely and you got away with it.
And he went, oh, no, I did this loads of times.
I thought he was describing one adventure, but no, this was his...
The method he alighted on for getting illegal substances into the UK.
I mean, I imagine not much because, you know, it can't take a lot of weight.
He was a pilot, though.
Well, I'm not sure he was.
Okay.
Was he, like, co-pilot, helper?
No, oh, no, I mean, I think he was flying it.
He was the only one in it.
Oh.
I don't think he was a pilot in the sort of accepted, fully qualified sense of the word.
I think he just sort of winged it.
I got that impression, but...
What was the value of his goods to make it worth the risk?
I don't know.
Because that's what I'm thinking.
You couldn't bring in, like, five tons of marijuana or something because you simply
couldn't get that onto the micro light.
So I'm assuming he was sort of bringing in, like, pills and powders and stuff that's sort
of relatively light to its value, but I don't know.
We didn't really dig into it because then he was showing me the bullet hole scar on
his leg from when he was shot.
Bloody hell.
He told you he was really sharing, wasn't he?
Yeah.
It all started from, he went, it's classic barber, opening gambit, isn't it?
You're not working today?
And I went, oh, no, you know, I work for myself, so just taking a bit of time off to come down
here.
I'm right, what do you do?
And I said, oh, I'm a writer.
And, yeah.
Oh, what do you write?
And I said this.
I've written a few books.
And he went, yeah, I'm thinking of writing a book.
And I was a bit like, oh, I always slightly win some people say that because then they're
going to tell you some really gash idea and you're going to have to go, oh, yeah, you
should definitely see that.
Yeah.
So, and he went, yeah, it's basically, you know, it's like, it's my life story.
And I was thinking, this still isn't promising.
And then I cut some more hair and then I go, but no, and he went, because, you know, I've
had quite a life being in prison.
And I was like, whoa, okay, that's, suddenly this has got more interesting.
And his, yeah, his life story was, in fact, amazing for a number of reasons, but micro
light of drugs was one of them.
Well, that sounds like a Meridian song.
But what I'm thinking is, if Gordon Murray was involved in this drug mulling,
yeah, he would only import lightweight drugs.
Would it be the, the, the, the LSD soaked paper?
Oh, that's very light.
Yeah, LSD soaked rice paper, for example.
And Gordon could he just, I'm not, by the way, I'm not saying that Gordon Murray is
or has ever been a drug mull, because I don't think, I don't think he has.
It's, he doesn't need to.
But imagine if he printed onto rice paper, schematic diagrams of, of Formula One
suspension systems or exotic road car exploded diagrams.
Yeah.
But it's all LSD that then gets chopped up into little, little squares and so.
Yes. Oh, I see.
So if he gets stopped, he could just go, no, this is a design for a new rear axle.
Yes, a scroll of designs.
But actually it's LSD.
Okay, interesting.
I mean, if you were then smuggling your rolls of LSD paper on a micro light
very low over the North Sea, you should definitely put it into a ziplock bag or
something, because you don't want to get splashed by seawater.
And it kind of rinses all the LSD off.
Just then a smudge drawing of a racing car axle.
No, you don't want that.
You don't want that at all.
No.
But also, you probably wouldn't fly below the radar because that immediately
looks like you're trying to hide something.
I'd do the opposite.
I'd be legit flying the correct manner, broad daylight, nothing dodgy at night
where you might get your micro light swallowed by a rogue wave.
And then, yeah, and then just land as normal, fill out the papers, walk off
with your diagrams under one arm in a waterproof ziplock bag.
And and there you go.
Yeah. And on the way back to the design studio, you go and visit some drug lords.
I don't know.
Do people do LSD anymore?
I'm not sure.
It's a genuine question.
I just I just don't know.
I don't I don't know what people I don't know what drugs people do.
Got no idea.
I don't feel like you hear about LSD much anymore.
But maybe it's just quietly there in the background, getting on with stuff.
The kids in school who used to do drugs when I was, you know, 90s secondary
school in the West country, LSD was the cheapest drug.
Was it? Yeah, it was.
I remember it being very cheap.
Now, I'm saying this, I I've genuinely I've never done any class A drugs
because I'm always I've said this before I think on a podcast.
I'm always just worried about how it's traveled and what it's been cut with.
So I was like, unless I'm growing my own product and I can verify the quality,
I'm out, you know, your your concern is that someone would offer you a line
of cocaine and you'd be like, oh, this smells of someone's bum hole.
Completely.
It's one of them.
I'm putting it smells of bum hole and also cornflour.
So therefore, I don't think this is legit.
I'm not going to do it.
Sorry. Yeah, I'll just have another pint of Malbec, please.
Yes, I because that's a regulated substance.
Yeah, you enjoy your little chef, sugar and
stale fart because I'm fine here.
Thank you.
Good. Well, I don't know if I don't know if you love to settle down
over Friday evening with a good book and some LSD do let us know.
Just out of curiosity, I just feel like it's one of those things that's gone
out of fashion and therefore your business model for getting gauze and
Murray to smuggle it in disguised as blueprints is maybe on a hiding to nothing.
I don't know. I just don't know.
You know, you know, we've talked about wanked handlebars before on Honda
Goldwings, yes, and my continued obsession with wanting a flat six
Goldwing engine in a motor car.
I don't know if I said this to you before because sometimes we forget
whether we've talked on WhatsApp or we've shared this information on the podcast.
But yeah, did you know there's a and I don't want to
I don't want to cheat on the the chat from co-part, who's still hunting down
Wanked Handlebar vehicles, but there's a website, an actual business
in the UK called Broken Wings, who just do salvage Honda Goldwings.
What they called broke seriously, they're called Broken Wings.
I kid you not, you can look it up.
Did the name come first and then they went, right, what's our business?
We could repair Paul McCartney's post Beatles band.
No, that's not going to work.
Is it? Oh, Honda Goldwings.
That's what we're doing.
I so weird. I know it.
You've only just found out about it.
I've only just found out about it.
I was typing in about, well, as I was having breakfast this morning,
I was thinking, I wonder if there's been any quite, quite modern
Honda Goldwings that have been smashed right up.
Didn't, didn't sin.
So you type in Honda Goldwing salvage and you immediately get brokenwingsuk.co.uk on their website.
Massive fans of Mr. Mr. The Eighty's band, do we think?
Yeah, funny enough, my original search for this, I just typed in brokenwings
and that's what came up was Mr.
Mr's popular hit.
Of course, because it's just a tune.
I'm looking at Broken Wings UK here.
It says, sell your Goldwing.
We buy MOT failures, unfinished projects, crash damaged, insurance write-offs,
high mileage, good condition, bad condition,
Wanked Handlebars.
You did the last bits made.
It doesn't, that's not on their bullet pointed list, sadly, but it should be.
Totally Wanked Handlebars.
There's a button that just says, sell my wing.
Oh, really?
Do people just call them wings then?
Is that a thing?
I didn't know that until this.
I wouldn't, if I had a Honda Goldwing, would I call it a wing?
Because obviously the Honda logo is a wing.
Oh, yes.
So do people who ride Hondas in general, they don't refer to their steed as a wing?
Do they?
Just going to, I'm just going to go out on the wing for a couple of hours.
Yeah.
Because the alternative would be to call it like the Goldie or something,
and I think it's...
Rubbish.
No good.
No, awful.
No, the wing, quite like that, the wing.
Well, there you go.
They're based in Essex in case you're interested.
Well, I'm hoping that the phone will be glowing in the next week after this podcast
where, I don't know, broken wings get in contact and go,
we've got like a five-year-old one that's done 12 miles
and the Handlebars look like a figure of eight.
Are you interested?
Absolutely, yes.
Not to get too technical, but in the Goldwing community,
we would refer to these Handlebars as wanked.
And so the engine is going begging.
They would, but I bet they've got...
They'll have an engine, if you want an engine.
Yeah, I know.
I've basically got to orchestrate how I could just wake up one day
and I've got a flat six Hilman Imp with a Goldwing engine already made.
What, you want this just magically happen?
Yeah, I do.
OK.
Some actual news that I wanted to share with us and the listeners.
Do you remember Ronnie Pickering?
I do remember Ronnie Pickering.
Of course you do.
Unlike the person he was shouting at in that famous video,
who had no idea who Ronnie Pickering was.
But then in those days, none of us did, I suppose.
Well, Ronnie Pickering, the man, the angry road rage man in the Citroen Picasso,
I think it was a burgundy colour.
He's been in the news again this week
because his family members issue a fake news message
after internet rumors of his death.
The family of household name Ronnie Pickering have slammed people online
after spreading fake rumors about his death.
Ronnie became a viral sensation after a rant at a moped rider.
Or it's his moped driver.
You don't drive mopeds.
Sorry Manchester Evening News, but that's just not right.
Which saw him utter the famous line,
Do you know who I am?
I'm Ronnie Pickering.
Which happened in 2015, so over 10 years ago.
He's now known by many across the country
and there's even an alternative heritage blue plaque
that was installed on the famous road where the incident took place.
Wasn't there subsequently a video of him having a fight in a pub beer garden?
Oh, was there?
Yeah, I feel like I'm imagining this.
I mean, I'll be honest, if you'd have asked me what year that was,
I'd have said even earlier, I feel like I thought that happened in the 2000s.
But that famous Picasso clip.
Yeah, there's thousands of posts on social media of the last couple of weeks
paying tribute to the hull-based man claiming he passed away on Friday, age 64.
His family have reacted angry and put this fake news to bed
and stated the rumor was not true and blasted people for being disgusting and disrespectful.
Have you ever been stuck on a weight loss plateau
trying everything and anything you can to lose that extra weight and reach peak health?
We've all been there, but Noom's unlocked a secret to reaching the mountaintop.
Go in micro.
The Noom GLP-1 microdose program starts at $99 and is delivered to your door in seven days.
Start your microdose GLP-1 journey today at Noom.com.
That's N-O-O-M dot com.
Noom, micro changes, big results.
Noom GLP-1 RX program involves healthy diet, exercise and support.
Individual results may vary.
Meds and personalization based on clinical need.
Not reviewed by FDA for safety, efficacy or quality.
No affiliation with Novo Nordisk Inc.
The only US source of FDA-approved semi-glutide.
Not available in all 50 US states.
Looking for a race that's more than just a run?
This one gives back to the trails you race on.
Join us May 9th in downtown Helena for the Don't Fence Me in Trail Run.
The happiest race in the West.
Climb iconic trails, take in big views
and when you cross that finish line, you're part of something bigger.
Spots are limited so don't wait.
Sign up for the 26th annual Don't Fence Me in Trail Run today.
Sign up at DfMI.run.
So Ronnie Pickering in the Citroen Picasso.
Well, he doesn't have the Picasso anymore.
He doesn't have the one that was featured because it got eBay'd for charity, I think.
And I'm annoyed that we didn't buy it.
He's still alive and if anybody knows him,
I would love him to do a voiceover for Smith & Snuff.
I think it'd be really nice.
Oh yes, look, there's a news story here from Hull Live
about him getting walloped in a beer garden.
Oh, he got punched in a beer garden.
He got punched to the ground in a beer garden.
In, when was this?
In 2018.
Yeah, he claims he was ambushed by a young thug.
Young thug is quite a good name for a grime artist or something, isn't it?
Oh, gosh, that coffee nearly came out of my nose.
I love it.
It's the term ambushed because that's never used in any other term.
Apart from like a black and white film that your grandpa would have watched on a Sunday.
I know, never.
I can't think of the last time I would have used the word ambushed in any context.
Do you honestly think he was ambushed?
Or do you think like three lads in tracksuits went,
oh, who do you think you are?
And he probably just went, yeah, yeah, whatever, guys.
And then they poked him a little bit,
or one of them might be threw a half a pint of fosters on him
and that was it, he just erupted.
A bit like Mumra from Thundercats that we've talked about before,
where he just suddenly gets up and you see the full majesty,
the full muscular physique of basically a guy that's supposed to be dead.
And I don't mean Ronnie Pickering, I mean Mumra the Undead.
No, Mumra the Everliving, I always get that wrong.
Greg always corrects me on that.
I'll read you a little bit of this story from whole life, if you like.
It says Mr. Pickering, who has suffered bruising
and what he believes are cracked ribs,
said, this lad was shouting, fight me, fight me.
I never answered him, I just blanked him.
I just wasn't interested in fighting anyone.
No.
I saw him take a run and then he punched me to the temple.
I hadn't been in a stance, if you know what I mean.
I wasn't prepared for it.
I fell straight backwards hitting a bench and then a wall.
It's quite a lot to dissect from that.
So well, so carefully described.
It's very Alan Bartridge, isn't it?
Hitting a bench and then a wall and then ultimately the ground.
This is what seems to have happened.
He dismissed that bit out or maybe he thought it was implicit
because of how gravity works.
I don't know, but...
That's right.
And I ripped my best Ben Sherman shirt on the way down.
Yeah.
Which is now obsolete, by the way.
It seems like he was outside smoking,
so he says, I got up, I went back inside the pub.
I wasn't about to leave my pint.
I didn't lose consciousness.
You can see that in the video.
Oh, really?
Okay, so again, it's his boxing credentials.
I went down, but I wasn't knocked out.
Mr Pickering has not sought medical treatment for his injuries
and refuses to go to the police insisting,
I am no grass.
That's just the way I was brought up.
So strange.
It's just a walking, it's just a walking,
bloody comedy series.
More important things to discuss than Mr Pickering.
Car and Classic.
You know that this channel is proudly supported by carandclassic.com,
but...
Indeed.
We have this ongoing...
It's not a feud.
What is it?
What would you call it?
It's a challenge.
Yes.
Japs.
Yes.
Use the word japs.
No, you can if you want.
Fun and japs.
Better than the word ambush.
But...
Yes, so every week one of us picks a car from car and classic
to give in inverted commas to the other one.
Yes.
If they were a eccentric billionaire who just liked gifting friends' cars.
Wouldn't have to be billionaire.
So, last week I gave you an American car.
Yeah.
This week it's your turn to give an American car to me.
Yes.
So, I started to...
Obviously, I was going through the...
There are, as you know, copious amounts of classifies,
but I went straight into the auction section.
And starting on the 20th of April, so it's open for pre-bids right now,
there is a vehicle which I immediately...
I just swooped in on.
Because I saw a couple of Shelby Super Snake Mustang type things
and I thought,
I'd like to see Richard manhandle one of those with a jammed open throttle,
but this one appealed to me more.
So, I bring to you.
Do you want me to send you the link so you can look at it as I talk about it?
Because that's sort of the professional thing to do, I think.
Probably quite slow, but everyone of a certain age will dig it.
And what this is, is a Chevrolet Corvette C4 replica of A-teams
Face Man.
Yeah.
Isn't it cool?
I love it.
I know.
I know.
We've said before, I think we both like C4 Corvettes.
Probably because of the Face Man.
I love the C4.
Even when this particular version probably is quite slow,
I still really like them.
Yes.
So, for people listening, it is, as you can probably imagine, a white Corvette.
Yes.
But with the red stripe up the side, as enjoyed by TV's...
Dirk.
What was he called?
Dirk Benedict.
Templeton Peck.
Wasn't he the character?
Yes.
Templeton Face Man Peck in the 80s.
Obviously, it's got the pop-up lights, but also it has spectacular digital instruments
that are incredibly 80s and therefore excellent.
It's got a red leather interior.
It bloody has.
I believe this one's for sale in Norfolk.
Not that that changes anything.
It's still a 1984 Corvette C4.
But this particular car has a signed Face Man photo that comes with it.
It's been in the UK since 2020, so potentially a COVID purchase.
And it has extensive amounts of service history, and it's showing at the moment 23,000 miles
that isn't verified, so we don't know if it's 123,000.
But Face Man replica with the stripes and the coach lines, white paintwork in good order,
minor lack appeal, near driver's side door handle.
That's fine.
I can live with that.
But crucially, the coolest 16-inch factory alloys.
I mean, 16s are enormous at that moment in time.
Yeah, they are, aren't they?
But also, those are.
I love those wheels.
I love those wheels so much.
I love them.
Intriguingly, in the back of some of these photos, there's what appears to be a kit replica
from Canite Rider.
Canite Rider, yes.
Is this a serial American TV star car collector?
I don't know.
It could be.
But anyway.
It's a small block Chevrolet 5.7, and the auction ends on the 27th of April.
And I should stop talking about that there.
But the problem was, right next to this auction tab is also another auction for a TV vehicle.
Not the same vendor, I don't think, on current classic, but it's the A-team van.
So you...
The auction starts on the same day at the same time, and if you are feeling flush...
And I'm definitely going to be forwarding this to my friend Colin Furze, because I know
he's been looking for one.
There is a 1981 GMC Van Durer A-team replica for sale.
It's just had a £15,000 bare metal restoration.
55,000 miles.
It's got the BF Goodrich white letter tyres on the turbo vac, deep dish rims.
Oh my gosh, it looks sensational.
I think this is the same place.
Look, the background is the same.
Oh, is it?
It's the same guy.
The building, that light brick wall.
Yeah, it is.
No, it definitely is.
Those photos are taking the same place.
I'm just looking now.
Right, this person's got it bad, haven't they?
Some kind of...
It's got...
It comes with memorabilia, including a handgun.
Presumably not the real one.
On a sec.
That...
What?
This is...
This is...
How many times do you see an advert that goes, it comes with a handgun.
It comes with...
It's got a three spoke wooden chrome stereo, which actually looks very cool.
It's got a memorabilia, includes 18 members photo, signed plaques, California A-team registration
show plates, a handgun, spare wheel found in the rear of the vehicle.
And this is, again, this is a five litre, sir, 305 cubic inch V8 with circa 155 to 180 horsepower
with the three speed auto.
Let's just...
Let's recap that.
It's a five litre V8.
It's...
Yes.
Are we sure?
I'm going to say 110 to 113 horsepower, probably from that, because that's a lazy motor.
Listen, it will sound the part and it will be easy driving because it's a three speed
auto.
And you can palm that thing into bisexual motion heritage show and everyone is going to go,
whoa, it's the A-team burn.
Again, a certain demographic of person is just going to be blown away by that early 80s.
It's got the roof spoiler.
It's got the spotlights across the top.
It's got the bull bar.
It's got the flared arches.
Wow.
Also, someone pointed out to me a while ago that the lazy A-team van replica maker, particularly
people who are just doing it on something else like a Bedford Rascal, they just tend to do
them all black with the red stripe.
But this is proper because it's black red stripe and then it's actually sort of dark
gray kind of silver on the top half.
That's the important bit and a lot of people don't do that because obviously it's fiddlier
to do.
I like that gray.
This is done right.
The only thing that's slightly puzzling me is that it looks like it's too long a wheelbase,
but maybe not.
Is it?
It was the A-team.
The A-team van always seemed quite stubby to me.
Yeah, they were quite stocky, yeah.
But it also had a rake on it.
The back was higher than the front in kind of like late 70s, early 80s hot rod stunts.
So tell me, in this world of me pretending to buy you cars on car and classic, are you
going to choose Faceman's VET or are you going to choose A-team van to...
You're not allowed to sell it for commercial gain.
You've got to keep it and enjoy it with the friends and family.
I am going to go Corvette, I think, because I genuinely like those Corvettes.
I think the C4 is one of the best looking American cars of all time.
I genuinely have a very, very good looking car.
Yeah.
I'm still very annoyed that I didn't buy that ZR1 burn find.
Sorry, ZR1 burn find.
I wish I had.
I don't, because also I think if you get the reference with the Corvette, that's cool,
but otherwise it's just a Corvette and people go, hey, nice car.
Yeah.
The A-team van is very clearly the A-team van.
And it's like, people go, what are you doing?
Why are you doing this?
Yeah.
But it would still be a lot of fun, I'm sure.
I'd be a right giggle.
You were saying that you're looking to replace your Tesla family car.
What about if you said to Mrs. Porter, if you just rocked up in that and she went, right,
it's fine for the family, can fit loads of people in, loads of space for the dog at the back.
Yeah, slightly kidnap people, let's gloss over that, be fine.
What would she say?
I think she might be a little bit horrified, but I don't know.
I mean, you know, she's a child of the 80s, or at least she grew up in the 80s like I did.
So she's, you know, it's got to have some cultural resonance.
But whether it's the cultural resonance that she would want to pull up to, I don't know, centre parks in it,
I'm not sure, might be a bit much.
Might be a bit much, love that.
Well, I mean, there's a photo of what looks like this Corvette and this A-team van together
on a website called A-team Hire.
Oh, so they're ex-hire vehicles, right?
Yeah.
Well, I'm going to say, hang on a sec, hang on a flip in sec, there's a picture of you on this website.
Oh, is it me with a picture of?
Yeah.
Okay.
So is that the same van?
That van is owned by a patron of or was owned several owners ago.
Of a patron called, yeah, called Pat, Truffle Shuffle Pat.
No.
Yeah, Pat owned that van many moons ago when I, and that's the, that's the last time,
I say the last time, it's almost the first time I ever smoked a cigar.
I remember you're smoking a cigar with the Benedict story now.
Well, he offered me such a big, chubby, high-grade Cuban and I thought, I don't smoke,
but I'm with a childhood hero.
If I'm going to do a bit of smoking, shall I do it now?
Yeah.
And I just said, without even thinking, I just went, yeah.
And I did.
And yeah, I think I tried smoking it for about an hour and a half and then just had to like tap out after that.
I was green.
Okay.
Yes.
Jeez.
That's the last time I ever smoked.
Well, the van is in Lincolnshire.
Yes, I know.
Which is quite close to you, isn't it?
You should just go and buy this.
When you say, just go and buy it, it's not that simple, really.
No, it is.
It's because I said, just go and buy it.
See, I'm making something complicated.
It sounds simple to lure you into doing it, but I mean, you know, what's difficult?
You take some money, you give it to this person and you leave with an 18 van.
Well, look.
You may or may not have stood next to you with Dirk Benedict.
We're not sure.
So you're going to go for Dirk Benedict's Face Man vet.
I was in the shortlist running, by the way, also on an auction.
I was going to go for a Dodgeram SRT10 Viper Quad Cab pickup, but because they were the
world's fastest pickup at the time from memory.
Yes, but I just, I don't know.
I think driving a massive American pickup in the UK, you'd look like a bit of a tit, wouldn't you?
The problem is, is I think unless it's got chrome on it, or it's blatantly from a very,
very old era, I don't like most of the American cars.
And I think the last of the interesting ones was that Impala SS that you bought for me,
and I still haven't received it yet, actually, from current customers.
I'm still waiting for it.
Are you sure that, like, every haven't just left it behind your bins or with a neighbor
or something?
Yeah, actually, there's a little card through the door saying, we missed you.
We've put this in a hedge down at the bottom of the garden.
Yes.
I'll go and have a look.
We noticed you lived by a river, so we've thrown it in the water.
I hope it wasn't a new phone or something.
I don't think this is the same Corvette.
In fact, I think I might be talking horse arse on this because there's a picture of the engine
of the Corvette for rent, and there's a picture of the engine of the Corvette for sale,
and they are different.
Are they now?
Oh, the sleuth.
The sleuth is back.
So there we go.
That's solved that one.
There is a company in Blackpool that will rent you an A-team van, and that's the one
that you've probably stood next to.
Yeah.
Well, I'm glad that's wrapped up.
Yeah, I'm glad about that.
And do you know, remember I saw a sort of ruddy-faced couple in quite a boring convertible the
other week?
Oh, yes.
The lady looking a bit like a sort of farmer's spec, Jilly Cooper.
I've not seen them since, but what I have seen, I think somebody's just taking a piss
around this area now.
I saw a voxel Belmont going by the other morning in Rush Hour, okay?
And the guy driving it was dressed as a businessman, like a middle-aged businessman.
Right.
With no sense of irony at all.
We talked about this before.
Do you remember a time-travelling businessman?
I think he's back.
Oh, okay.
Right.
Just mid to late 80s saloon car that's not particularly cooking model, but in good condition.
And he's just living in 2026, but yet is oblivious to the fact that he's 40 years frozen in time.
Well, I mean, there are various reasons why time travel probably isn't possible, but if
you were going to do it, then I'm sure the first thing you'd do is come back and drive
at Belmont.
Are you sure it wasn't Mike from Candy Showroom?
Because he likes to dress like a sort of 90s businessman, but he would obviously he does.
Yes.
And he would have a BM.
No, yeah, but he's a young man.
Oh, okay.
He'd have to be at least 55.
So it wasn't him, but it was definitely a Belmont and an older man who looked well suited.
It was incredible.
I was just out picking dandelions for the tortoises, minding my own business.
Buzz lus.
Sorry.
What a lovely lead.
Look, we should wrap this up.
But before we go, rather than the usual nonsense, I just wanted to take a moment to talk about
a chap called Ian Dealey, who was a longtime listener and supporter of this podcast.
But by day was he worked for BBC Radio.
He was a brilliant audio engineer and studio manager at the BBC.
Ian sadly died about two or three weeks ago, quite unexpectedly.
He had had some health issues and we discussed them.
He used to email in quite a lot.
He did.
He'd helped me over the years with various audio issues when my inept ability to sort
out audio stuff, Ian could just fix it in his sleep.
He was so talented at all of that sort of engineering side of things and just knowing
how to make really good sounding audio.
And when I had a particular nightmare, bless him, he just offered to take the audio file
and he cleaned it up using his know-how so that it was actually usable and it wouldn't
have been without that.
So he did us a load of favors and gave us a lot of help as well as just support and
being, you know, real, real early listener to this.
He was.
And very encouraging about it.
I can't believe he's died.
I know.
I still can't believe it either because...
He was not old.
He was not.
He was, I think, 45.
And actually, I didn't even realize he was that old because, you know, he's quite youthful.
I first met him at your late break live event in Kent.
Really?
He'd come down for that.
Yeah.
And we were chatting for ages just, you know, sort of beep gossip and things like that.
And then after that, you know, we used to sort of email every so often just either stuff
about cars or he would email the show.
He'd seen something he thought would interest us.
He was just a really genuinely lovely guy.
And yeah, it's a total shock to find out that he died very suddenly.
Oh, gosh.
So I just wanted to say, yeah.
In fact, he's a sweet, sweet guy because obviously I think he worked with Steve Wright.
He did.
The very well-known DJ who was linked to the original term sweet, sweet guy.
So I think, yeah.
Ian, thanks for all the listening, you know, and thanks for your support.
I'm sorry to end on a bit of a downer, but I just thought I couldn't go unacknowledged
that he was a genuinely lovely bloke and also a very, very talented audio engineer.
And he helped us in ways that everyone else out there probably would never know
because he fixed our ineptitude on a few occasions or at least gave us pointers on how to do it.
And that sort of generosity and kindness is not forgotten.
So go well, Ian.
And you'll be greatly missed.
Thanks to everyone.
This is our, like I say, this is our first visual official podcast.
And I've been shitting myself about it.
So hopefully it's worked.
Just wanted to be really honest with the audience.
Yes, we hope so.
I've been properly soiling it.
Yeah.
I can't see you, Richard, but that's the nature of our beast.
We like it that way, don't we?
That's how it works.
Anyway, well, if you have been watching this video, hopefully that has added something or other
if you're just listening as normal and hopefully you barely detected any change.
Assuming this has worked, we'll be back on Friday with a video otter sort.
And then this is sort of how we'll do it from now on.
But for now, thank you ever so much for listening.
Oh, come to our Belfast live show on the 15th of May as well.
There are some tickets available.
We don't know how many they keep sending me spreadsheets that I can't understand.
But I believe it's not quite sold out.
It may be close.
It's got to be on the cusp at Belfast 15th of May at the Mac.
Go to smithansniff.com and you can follow a link there to buy tickets.
Or you could just buy some merchandise, t-shirts, mugs, all that sort of stuff.
We have them there.
And as I said, we'll be back again on Friday with otter sort normal show next Monday until then.
Goodbye.
Bye, guys.
Cheers, mate.
Thanks, mate.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
I didn't tell you, Richard.
I'm wearing my terrible quality dressing gown.
Why didn't you return the dressing gown if it was so bad?
It just seemed like a lot of work.
So as we were planning to do this visual podcast, I just thought, you know what, I'll put a piece
of our merch on because obviously we ought to promote ourselves.
That's sort of the point of it.
But then I was like, I need something slightly warmer and it's very soft to the touch, this
material.
So I thought, shall I just wear my coy robe?
And then I was like, yeah, bollocks.
I'm going to wear my coy robe.
Yeah.
It's the way I roll, mate.
It's the way I roll.
Hello, hello.
It's Brooke Devard from Naked Beauty.
Join me each week for unfiltered discussion about beauty trends, self-care journeys, wellness
tips, and the products we absolutely love and cannot get enough of.
If you are a skincare obsessive and you spend 20 plus minutes on your skincare routine,
this podcast is for you.
Or if you're a newbie at the beginning of your skincare journey, you'll love this podcast
as well because we go so much deeper than beauty.
I talk to incredible and inspiring people from across industries about their relationship
with beauty.
You'll also hear from skincare experts.
We break down lots of myths in the beauty industry.
If this sounds like your thing, search for Naked Beauty on your podcast app and listen
along.
I hope you'll join us.
Thank you.
About this episode
The hosts kick off with the show’s shift to video, then dive into listener mail about BTCC touring-car rules and a hilarious (and NSFW) Silverstone birthday story involving a Saab convertible and a BBC cameraman. The conversation veers through farm machinery “space saver” tires, classic rock/TV nostalgia (Iron Maiden, Jennifer Rush), and a surreal Artemis launch riff. A major segment covers Ronnie Pickering’s fake-death rumor, then the Car and Classic challenge: choosing between a Face Man–themed C4 Corvette and an A-Team van that “comes with a handgun.” They close with a tribute to longtime BBC audio engineer Ian Dealey.
Jonny and Richard notice an unusual bonus item included with a car for sale. Also in this episode, mad barbers, overdue news from the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, various kinds of Artemis, smuggling with a microlight, a business suggestion for Gordon Murray, Broken Wings, Ronnie Pickering, another pick from Car & Classic, a time travelling Belmont businessman, and this podcast is now also on video.
