BTCC is the British Touring Car Championship, a racing series in the UK. Teams race production-based cars, and in this bit they’re talking about picking a car maker to sponsor/enter a team.
OEM just means the car company itself—the brand that makes the production cars. In racing, it’s the manufacturer that backs the team and provides the race program.
Audi is the car brand mentioned as already involved, so the teams can’t pick it again in this game-like setup. It’s included to show which manufacturers are off-limits.
Nissan is mentioned as already taken in the scenario, so the team can’t pick it for their manufacturer deal. It’s included to set the rules of the game.
Volvo is listed among the manufacturers that are already in the BTCC setup and can’t be chosen as the new OEM. The mention supports the idea that multiple brands are competing/represented in the series.
A privateer is a racing team that competes without being the main factory-backed works team. In touring car series like the BTCC, privateer entries could still race competitive cars, but the relationship to the manufacturer (and eligibility rules) could differ from official OEM programs.
The BMW 3 Series is a popular car line from BMW that’s meant to be comfortable for daily driving but still fun to drive. The podcast is mentioning an older version (the E36) because that generation is often linked with BMW’s racing history.
DTM is a German race series for touring cars—think production-based cars modified for racing. When people bring it up, they’re usually talking about which car models were racing at that time. Here it’s helping them figure out the right era.
The Volvo 850 is a family car from Volvo. The podcast mentions it because racing versions—especially the wagon/estate—helped make the 850 more famous beyond normal road use.
The Aston Martin DBX is a fancy SUV. Here, the host points out it was towing a small trailer, which is not what you’d normally expect from a car like that.
Car
Renault Avantime
The Renault Avantime is a weird, uncommon Renault that looks like a cross between a family car and a coupe. The host remembers it because it was packed full of ladders, which made it stand out even more.
Le Mans is one of the biggest endurance races in the world, famous for running for a full 24 hours. The mention here signals this is serious race-car territory.
Hydration just means drinking enough water. On a long drive, it helps you feel better and less anxious, and it can prevent you from having to stop suddenly.
In the UK, the boot means the trunk. The speaker is saying the CD changer was often placed in the trunk area.
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I'm Richard Porter.
I'm Johnny Smith.
And this is On the Other Side of Things, the Smith & Sniff spinoff in which we answer your questions.
Once again, we are going to answer some questions because that's what we do in the show on a Friday,
a little half an hour. Shall I just dive in there?
I dare you. You're good at doing the early dive on this. I've got to get better at my clutch control.
I'm usually riding it and you've already gone.
Yeah, let's just crack on.
This one is from early this year, so pretty recent by our standards from a listener called Matt Edwards
who says, hello, you sweet, sweet hamshafts.
Guys, look, listen, here's the situation. It's the late 1990s, say 1997.
And Mr. Touring Cars, Alan Gao.
Yes. Listen to this podcast. Hello, Alan Gao.
Has asked you each to start up a BTCC team and secure a deal with a manufacturer to race in the series.
Therefore, Audi, Renault, Nissan, Honda, Peugeot, Vauxhall, Volvo and forwards cannot be selected.
Richard, as the owner of Flute Sport Racing, which manufacturer are you picking as a new OEM into the BTCC
and which late 90s model are you choosing?
Johnny, as the owner of Sleeve Speed, which manufacturer are you picking and which late 90s model?
Bonus points if they're saloon cars to fit the late 90s super touring barges vibe of the time.
So hang on, we're not allowed to choose cars that were actual touring cars. Is that right?
That's right. So yeah, so Matt's hopefully done us a list.
Audi, Renault, Nissan, Honda, Peugeot, Vauxhall, Volvo and Ford are all in there already.
So we have to pick somebody else.
Oh, gosh.
As soon as you started that question, I thought if it's starting a touring car team now, I would have immediately shot in.
But I can't. So I've had to retract my offer.
You could just dance. You could bloody mindedly answer that question instead.
Well, it's fine.
I'd go Alpha and I pick Azulia, the car that we constantly talk about.
And I would try and make the United Kingdom buy more Azulias because they are so good and they look so cool.
And I think as a race version, they would look shit white.
Look mega.
BMW not in BTCC in 97. Maybe they maybe they're not officially were they a privateer then?
They were deaf. Well, hang on. They were definitely doing DTM and it would have been the E36 then, wouldn't it?
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
So I think that maybe that wasn't official at that point. I lose track.
Now, it's because there is, you know, we're sort of boxed in here. A lot of money.
Yeah, it's tempting to say Citroen because Renault were in there.
So it feels like Citroen is left out now.
The PSA.
I'm thinking of the 97 championship and I'm thinking that that would be around the time where you could have a Zantia Activa.
So what better way to show off your anti-roll technology?
I'm sure it's against the rules, but let's pretend it isn't.
They're all go around and there's this uncannily level Zantia.
I probably wouldn't be competitive for other reasons, but it'd be quite a fun thing to watch go around anyway.
Failing that.
I'm thinking that...
Well, Rover doing it then.
Well, they weren't, you see. So this is where I was sort of going. There's two options here.
It's a little early, but let's say the 98 season because then the Rover 75 is on sale.
Oh, 75 touring car.
Oh, you naughty float.
But around that time, again, it would have to be the 98 season.
So I'm thinking all the attention that Volvo got from racing 850 estate cars.
Yeah.
And all this.
I know it's not strictly playing to its strengths, but in 1997, definitely in 98, Land Rover had just launched the Freelander.
Quite an unusual car for them because it was so, you know, they were worried it wasn't hardcore off-road enough because it was a monocoque and it didn't have a low-range gearbox, bloody, bloody, bloody.
Lean into that. The Freelander touring car.
That's a flippin' smart idea, Rich, because they did a two-wheel drive version, an economy version at some point, didn't they?
I think that was Freelander 2.
Yeah, the Freelander 1, they didn't officially do it, but a lot of Freelander 1s became two-wheel drive because that reduction gear thing broke.
And it used less petrol.
Same, same.
So it's 5.
Yeah.
Exactly, yeah.
V6?
Yes, well, there was.
Yeah, that came a bit later.
That didn't come until the 2000s, but, you know, let's cut fast and loose with these rules and say, yeah, I'm good to go.
That's my final answer from Racing Freelander.
The PR is writing itself. This is great.
Although, all I'm thinking about now, and I know we have a strong gang of Aussie and NZ listeners.
Imagine if the Rover 75 went into V8 touring cars over there.
That would have been so good, wouldn't it?
It might not have been competitive, but it would have looked hard as nails.
I would have liked that.
But it's not happening.
So sorry, everybody, it didn't happen.
Certainly not.
Are there any manufacturers which disappeared?
Well, aside from Rover, I suppose, Saab.
Yes, you swine, because they did a good saloon.
They did do a good estate, as you know.
They also did a convertible.
Not sure you'd enter the convertible.
Well, hang on again, PR-wise.
PR-wise would be amazing.
It's going to stand out, right?
It's going to be fantastic.
And also, you know when Jan Lamers put a pretend dog in the back of the Volvo?
I don't know if it was actually Jan, or whether it was just someone in the team.
Imagine if the Saab Cabrio, because I'm not sure whether you'd be allowed to legit race it with the top down or not.
We'll see.
Yeah, with a cage, though.
With a cage, I reckon, you could just have a black bin liner for Superleggera.
So it looks like the hood, but it's just a black bin liner.
But what I was thinking of is you could attach to the race driver's helmets a huge amount of long hair.
And you'd race with the windows down.
Don't know why.
So that as you were overtaking people, just a stream of Rapunzel spec hair just came out of the car.
Everyone wanted a photo or a video clip of the Saab Cabrio BTCC car with hair.
Is there a possibility that in fact the Saab comes last in every race down to the sheer drag of all the hair just blowing out to the side?
It could be.
It could be an enormous.
But can you imagine all of the merch?
The fans, they all have huge wigs.
We're here for the hair.
That's the tagline.
Come on Saab drop top crew.
It would be great.
Saab Hairow.
Saab Hairow.
Don't have to tell you the model name and there you go.
Saab 93 Hairow.
That's in Hairow.
And we'd get Bonnie Tyler to come in and she'd sing I'm Holding Up for a Hairow.
Yes.
There you go. See we've sorted all of this out.
Bloody hell, this is clever, Rich.
Well, I really, it's a great question.
It's a really good question.
Alan Gow, if you are still listening and you want to just fill us in on whether any of this would be within the rules now.
Feel free, it'd be interesting to know because we didn't bother to check before answering this question.
But anyway, thank you Matt for that question, it was excellent.
Yeah, it was.
Well, I'm going to go in with a question by a chap called Cam.
I think he's from Australia because he's signed it off with Cam from the world's best test cricketing nation.
But let's just see.
Hi, you pair of rigid woodwind instruments.
When listening to your recent conversation regarding the song Send Me an Angel,
my mind went straight to the track of the same name by a band called Real Life.
Living in Australia, I guess I was fortunate enough to have never heard of the Scorpion song.
However, thanks to following Johnny's instruction to give it a listen,
I now know that like an actual Scorpion, it's best avoided.
I'm a fan of...
We haven't yet addressed your Send Me an Angel confusion.
We'll do it on the main podcast on that because it's quite complicated.
There are two songs called that.
There are and I have to issue an official apology and addressing the situation, so I will do.
He's put, I'm a fan of the Real Life song, which was first released in 83,
but at that time I was not a licensed driver.
Later in the 80s, when I finally had a license and my own car,
I was certainly listening to some new wave as well as punk, blues and older rock,
white road tripping in my, while road tripping in my 1600 Mark II escort.
For my regular 800 kilometre round trips from Sydney to my hometown and back,
I had it equipped with four spotlights, Recaro driver's seat, CB radio,
and for the tunes, I fitted a pioneer head unit from an Aussie Ford LTD,
which had a cassette player and inbuilt graphic equaliser of course.
Unfortunately, I had to constantly run it at maximum volume to hear anything
over the noise from the sports air filter and Yokohama A008,
and as straight through exhaust at 4000 RPM.
Ah, the joys of being young and completely stupid.
I hope you can do some live shows here in Australia at some point in the future.
I've just got to the end of this and realised there's not a question.
No, I haven't heard a question, is that it?
I'm at the end of it now and it just says cheers mate, thanks mate, bye.
But the title has Ottersot in it.
Well, not to make an example of Cam from Australia, but here's the rules.
If it's a question, put Ottersot at the start of the subject line.
If it's not a question, don't do that because Johnny gets confused and reads it to us anyway.
It just helps to find it. Our filing is not good.
If we can find the questions more quickly, then we can answer them.
Cam is forgiven. Do you know what, this is the punishment I get for being timely.
This was only sent in yesterday and this is what happens when we answer questions that are fresh.
You need questions that have been allowed to sort of percolate.
Yes, marinate.
I need a marinated question really.
Well, I can do one. Do you want me to do one or is it your turn?
Go ruin it.
Okay, this is titled Cars That Aren't Used For Their Intended Purpose.
Hi, you pair of Stuttgart-based doppelganger...
doppel...doppelkablung...kablung's getrebes.
For my question, of course that was difficult.
For my question, I want to quickly take you back to the summer of 2013
when my parents, my bro and I were making our annual drive to the south of France for family holiday.
While the 12-hour drive could become a little tedious for a teenager, which I was at the time,
I was lucky to be doing it in the back of my dad's first-generation Skoda superb.
This meant I could at least enjoy more legroom than the average Swiss banker being show for Deseric Airport.
While the Skoda's 1.9 TDI chugged away and carried us further away from home,
I kept myself entertained by doing a bit of light car spotting out of the side windows
whilst trying to find any interesting cars that were making their way south down to the Belgian and French highways.
We were just leaving Belgium when I saw that we were overtaking a caravan with Dutch number plates,
nothing out of the ordinary on a drive like ours.
The Dutch caravans were also migrating in their thousands in search of better baguettes and weather.
When all of a sudden my dad drew my attention and said, look what's towing that.
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Dear crew, it's Toyota.
With an adult-sized third row, everyone's welcome in the Grand Highlander.
From sports fans to eco-buffs and movie fans.
Seen back in the Sienna with an available rear seat entertainment system.
Slip into the RAV4 with available all-wheel drive and let's go.
Toyota.
Find yours at Toyota.com.
Toyota.
Let's go places.
As we pulled past the caravan, in that slow way where it just reveals itself,
I saw that the small glass fibre home on wheels was not being pulled along by a Golf or a Kashkai,
but by a then-new Audi A7 3.0-litre TDI.
That image has stuck with me to this day because the idea of a big German Luxobarge
pulling a modest caravan didn't really compute in my head.
I suspect not many caravan owners were consulted in the focus groups for the A7 in Ingolstadt.
Anyway, this brings me to my actual question.
Do you know of any other cars being used for a totally different purpose that they weren't really designed for?
Maybe someone is using a phantom to take things to the skip,
or somewhere there's a funeral director arriving at the house of the deceased in a Range Rover Sport SVR.
Thanks a bunch for many hours of entertainment.
You've given us here's to many more CMT-TMB.
I think I pronounced your name.
Shtin?
S-T-I-J-N.
S-T-I-J-N.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Thanks, Stin.
Yeah, I love doing long continental journeys and trying to sniff out interesting cars.
It's great.
I bet you've seen a few, Rich.
Well, there's two sprung to mind.
And I can't remember if I've mentioned either of these on the podcast before.
One, not that long ago, I saw one of those small tip trailers.
You know the sort.
Just a little two-wheeled.
They always look very bouncy.
Like if they're not laden, they're just...
They could sort of bounce on the ground.
They're like one of those annoying dogs that when you go into someone's house and they say he won't jump at you,
but he will, and he does.
He's just being friendly.
No, he's just being a dick.
I wish he only would say that sometimes and just be honest.
Yeah, he's just being a dick.
So I saw one of those being towed by an Aston DBX.
What?
I know.
And I still can't...
I was like, what's going on here?
But it was a tip trailer.
I mean, I couldn't see if there's anything in it or what might be in it.
But yeah, very unusual.
That is...
Yeah, yeah, that's bad.
But the one that really lives in the mind, and this was a while back,
was I saw a Renault Avantime that was absolutely stuffed full of ladders and shit.
Like, I assume it was someone who was, I don't know, a decorator or a gutter repair person or something.
But there were definitely more than one ladder sort of across the whole passenger side.
And it just looked like it had absolutely tons of crap in it,
but it appeared to be being used as a van.
Right.
And I don't think the Renault Avantime, you know, I think the designers imagined it sort of
swishing around Paris looking terribly interesting and chic,
and not, in fact, getting paint on the carpet and ladders tearing the upholstery.
It was really, really striking.
I mean, apart from the elves, you don't see Avantimes very often, do you?
No.
So I sort of think they're almost at the point now where they're cars that people look after.
But this looked like a working car to me.
Oh, they are now.
They've got a very cult following, haven't they?
Especially, and I know they're hard to get parts for.
So those people tend to club together.
But well, the one that was quite publicized in so much it sort of broke the internet at the time
was a bloke that I subsequently went and filmed his car cave,
a chap called Martin Overington in Surrey.
The man that bought the beast, actually.
The beast, it wasn't the car in question,
but he had a pre-war, or has a pre-war Bentley that he races at places like the Vival.
And he towed his 9-6-2 Porsche World Endurance Championship car,
a Le Mans car, down to actual Le Mans, I think it was,
using a 1920s Bentley, because he said,
I can't be bothered to tow two cars or hire a transporter,
because he priced up a transporter truck to load it onto one of these nice covered transporters.
He said, that's absurd. I'll do it myself.
And then he realized that the Bentley's of that era are kind of like a lorry.
So towing, he said, honestly, towing wasn't a problem.
And I've had confirmation from my brother that the torque of those early cars was huge.
You could pull away in almost any gear.
And so Martin, yeah, he dragged this Porsche all the way down there
and got paparazzi pretty much all the way.
So I think that, I never saw it myself, but I think that's dead cool.
Yeah.
I wish I had seen it.
Yeah, very cool.
I did, was it not Atari Bugatti who referred to Bentley's as the world's fastest lorries?
Yeah, I think it was.
That's a disparaging way.
So they are sort of seen as quite trucky by some people.
But yeah, that was amazing.
Hasn't Martin thingy now sold the beast?
I believe the beast has sold.
And I'm quietly annoyed that you and I haven't been in a position to align our finances and buy it,
because I would have very much enjoyed.
I know there's a list of things which Swithers have ought to buy, prelude being one of them.
But yeah, I'd really like the beast.
There's something so odd about it.
I don't know.
It's just such a weird, I feel very privileged to have driven it.
One of very few people has driven it, but it does sound utterly broken when you drive it.
But it is captivating.
It's a complete madness.
One man's mad machine.
I bloody love that, mate.
I always think it's weird when you see cabriolets or roadsters towing anything.
So I've seen a BMW Z3 with a tow bar on it before towing.
A trailer tent, those sort of very pancake flat caravans.
They fold up, don't they?
Like an accordion, a vertical accordion.
So I've seen that and I've seen a Smart with a tow bar, a Smart 4.2, which is a bit funny.
And I think the thing that I felt the most sorry for is that I saw a VW Bay Window van
that was definitely 1600cc, because most of them were, and it looked very standard.
And it was towing a fairly large caravan.
And I know that without anything additional on the back, those vans are woefully underpowered.
That engine in a beetle is fine.
That engine in a fully laden campervan with children, dog, bedding, tins of beans.
And then a caravan, that's effing cruel.
That is just cruel.
And I almost prayed for it as I went by like, please get there and please don't just fully let go,
because I just imagine the internals of that engine just sweating, sweating their little bums off.
But yeah, there's been loads and I'm sure the listeners will have a few to throw at us, which we welcome.
Don't we, Rich?
Yes, always.
Always?
I know.
Let's move on to a question from a listener called Chris, who has put this subject line as
Ottersot, time-sensitive patron.
Oh.
He really wants to make it clear.
Actually, this did come in only a couple of weeks ago, so we'll write that.
But someone ran into the back of me writing it off.
Agh.
So on a whim, I went to deepest, darkest Dartmouth for another one.
But after a few months, its engine decided not to engine anymore.
So now we're doing it in the car we always should have.
My trusty, believe it or not, Richard, Fiat Panda 100 horsepower.
Chris says, we're raising money for the amazing praxis care, a charity that supports individuals
with mental ill health, autism, learning disabilities and dementia.
My question though is, what are your essentials for long road trips?
CMTMB, Chris.
Okay, Chris.
I think number one is food stuffs.
Number one is hydration.
So always have to have a very large bottle of water because I get slightly anxious if
there isn't any.
Not sure why.
I think it's because I'm a Pisces and I need water near me.
Although that sounds like I believe in that stuff and I just don't.
It's like when people are talking to you in the pub and then they suddenly pause and
they go, are you Sagittarius?
And I go, I beg your pardon and you expect that to have some substance to it.
But I tell you what I would do because I'm big on nuts, Rich.
Luckily, I don't have a nut allergy because that wouldn't be great.
So I always go for it because it's easy to buy some terrible food for you because you
can eat absolute filth on a drive cart.
You can just delve into filth.
You've said it before, you can eat a bin liner full of kettle chips and then you feel really
unwell.
So I always go for some good clean nuts or a nut trail mix type thing with raisins and
other stuff like that.
I'm a big fan.
It keeps you, keeps you fueled.
It's not too grotty and it's there.
And I used to in my merc, and I've said this before, my old Mercedes 123 in the glove box,
I used to have one of those little joke shop fake cameras on a key ring, which when you
put your eye to the eyepiece, the viewfinder and hold it to the light, it has Victorian
nudity in it.
Oh, OK.
And it's an old what the butler saw type of thing.
I used to keep it in the glove box.
I don't know why somebody gave it to me.
And I remember once getting stuck in one of those traffic jams where the motorway pretty
much closes with you on it.
And all I had was a drink, some digestives and that camera.
I wasn't bored.
So there we go.
I probably agree.
I would say that the two priorities for me would be easily summed up as tunes and food.
Oh yes, songs.
Good music, which of course now is much easier than it would have been 20 years ago and beyond
because you can hopefully just stream stuff.
So you can, you know, you have sort of infinite possibilities.
You didn't have to plan, you know, a box of tapes or a wallet of CDs.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, I really want to listen to the album and I've left the CD at home.
The wallet of CDs.
But I, yeah, food.
I don't know.
I am a sucker for bad road snacks and then regretting it, including learn by my mistakes.
I did this the other day because I'm a friggin idiot.
I was in a petrol station in an electric garden.
I only went in to get a coffee and I saw they had these from a brand I'd not heard of,
but they looked a bit sort of ye olde, traditionally, like liquorice sweets, like liquorice torpedoes.
And I went, ooh, I love liquorice.
Bought a bag of those and then just did the lot on the remaining bit of the car journey
over two hours.
But then of course you get the horrendous sugar crash after something like that and your teeth
feel like they're all coated in valour.
It's really, it's just going, why do I do this to myself?
And yet, here we are.
I'm almost 51 years old and I'm still doing dickwit things like that.
So don't do that.
I think your advice on food is much better.
Is it like when people have rally cars, have their dashboards flocked,
it feels like your teeth have been flocked, I always feel.
It is, it's flocked.
They're all furry.
Yeah, I think music's a good point.
And funny enough, I've been touring around in my beetle this last week
and that has a CD player and a non-functioning radio.
Don't know why.
So I do actually carry with me at least three CDs in the door wallet
and I circulate the CDs.
It's quite nice.
For that reason alone, it feels like a bit of a time machine.
Yeah.
Because one of the problems in a bygone age was the six CD changer,
particularly it was located in the boot because what usually happened in my experience
is that you just found yourselves listening to the same six albums on rotation.
Yes.
Because you'd always forget to change them.
And in many ways, just a single slot in the dash was more conducive to
a more varied palette of listening things.
If you'd remembered the wallet of CDs, which...
You must remember the wallet.
I'm currently circulating Older by George Michael with The Best of the Doors.
Yeah.
Ibiza chilled 2003.
Oh, okay.
And there's one other thing in there that's rock music,
and I can't remember what it is, but those are my four in the door pocket right now.
Just so you know.
Good.
Well, I've got time for one more of the...
It's not really, but we have had a message.
This is not for Otisot, but it's weird that it's just...
It just reminded me of something you just said.
We get this quite a bit, people going,
oh, we've got someone to be a great guest on your podcast,
and you go, well, we don't really have guests on our podcast, but thanks.
And this one says, what if the voice you've been taught to silence is the one telling you the truth?
Oh.
And it's promoting a...
I won't say the name, but it's a spiritual self-help memoir
in which the author shares her journey from feeling invisible and dismissed
to embracing the guidance from the universe.
Oh.
Now, she's someone who'd come up to you in a pub and say, are you a Sagittarius?
Almost certainly.
She would, yeah.
Yeah, I don't think we'll...
I would...
You know when you have a pint that's got lovely condensation
rolling down the sides of it, which always looks very alluring, especially in summer?
Yes.
I would make sure that my hand was very wet from that,
and then I would shake her hand and make fixed eye contact with her and say,
I'm Pisces, that's why my hands are wet.
I'm born for the water.
Yes, I'm constantly wet, so...
Anyway, where are you going?
Oh, no, you've walked off.
Okay, well, except they probably wouldn't go,
wow, that's so fascinating, tell me more about it.
Okay, well, look, we should wrap this up,
but if you have a question, it's hello at smithansniff.com,
is our email address, and we will answer more questions on Friday,
normal show on Monday.
Until then, goodbye.
Thank you, everybody.
Slip into the RAV4 with available all-wheel drive, and let's go.
Toyota, find yours at Toyota.com.
Toyota, let's go places.
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About this episode
Richard Porter and Johnny Smith field listener questions in a fast, joke-heavy Q&A spinoff. The big debate: if BTCC teams in the late 1990s must avoid certain OEMs, which manufacturer and model would they pick—leading to wild “super touring” hypotheticals like a Racing Freelander and a hair-filled Saab Cabrio. Other segments cover cars used for odd jobs (luxury cars towing caravans, a Renault Avantime as a ladder-hauler) and essentials for long road trips (water, snacks, and music—plus nostalgic CD rotation).
Jonny and Richard answer listeners’ questions about starting your own 90s BTCC team, cars being used for an out-of-character purpose, and road trip essentials.