What’s happened to Porsche? | The Car Podcast #75
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Car
Ferrari 512 TR
The Ferrari 512 TR is a fast and stylish sports car made by Ferrari in the 1990s. It has a powerful engine and is popular among car lovers.
Car
Lamborghini Countach
The Lamborghini Countach is a famous sports car that was made from the 70s to the 90s. It's known for its sharp angles and powerful engine, making it a symbol of luxury and speed.
Car
Land Rover Range Rover
The Range Rover is a fancy SUV made by Land Rover. It's known for being very comfortable and powerful, often used for both city driving and off-road adventures.
Car
Land Rover Defender V8
The Land Rover Defender V8 is a tough, off-road vehicle that has a powerful V8 engine. It's known for its ability to handle rough terrain and is a favorite among people who love adventure.
Term
V8 engine
A V8 engine has eight cylinders that help the car produce a lot of power. It's commonly found in powerful cars and trucks, making them faster and more capable.
Car
G-Class Gwagon
The Mercedes-Benz G-Class, or G-Wagon, is a fancy SUV that looks very tough and can go off-road. It's popular for its unique shape and luxurious features inside.
Car
Triumph TR7
The Triumph TR7 is a British sports car made in the late 1970s and early 1980s. It has a unique triangular shape and is known for being one of the last cars made by Triumph.
Term
V12 engine
A V12 engine has twelve cylinders arranged in a V shape. It usually runs very smoothly and can produce a lot of power, which is why it's often found in high-end cars.
Term
automatic gearbox
An automatic gearbox is a system in a car that changes gears on its own. This means you don't have to manually shift gears while driving, making it easier to operate the vehicle.
Car
Ferrari 599
The Ferrari 599 is a high-performance sports car made by Ferrari. It has a powerful engine and is designed for both speed and comfort, making it a favorite among car lovers.
Car
Ferrari F12
The Ferrari F12 Berlinetta is a super-fast sports car that came out in 2012. It's famous for its powerful engine and beautiful looks, making it a dream car for many people.
Car
BMW E32
The BMW 7 Series is a fancy car made by BMW that is designed for comfort and luxury. The E32 is a specific version of this car that was made in the late 1980s and early 1990s.
Car
BMW 735i
The BMW 735i is a luxury sedan that offers a smooth and comfortable ride. It's known for being well-balanced, making it enjoyable to drive.
Car
Audi A8 W12
The Audi A8 W12 is a high-end luxury car that has a powerful W12 engine, providing a smooth and powerful driving experience. It's designed for comfort and advanced features.
Car
Mercedes-Benz G-Wagen
The G-Wagen is a tough and luxurious SUV made by Mercedes-Benz. The previous generation is the older version that had its own unique style and features.
Car
Mercedes-Benz G65 AMG
The G65 is a special version of the G-Wagen that has a very powerful V12 engine. It's designed for those who want a mix of luxury and extreme performance.
Term
horsepower
Horsepower is a way to measure how powerful an engine is. More horsepower usually means a car can go faster and accelerate better.
Term
torque
Torque is a measure of how strong an engine is at making the car move. More torque means the car can start moving faster and pull heavier loads.
Term
twin-turbo
Twin-turbo means the engine has two turbochargers that help it produce more power. This makes the car faster and more efficient than if it only had one turbo.
Car
Mercedes-Benz SL
The Mercedes-Benz SL is a fancy convertible car that has been around for a long time. The SL500 version is especially liked because it drives smoothly and has a strong engine.
Car
Mercedes-Benz SL500
The Mercedes-Benz SL500 is a fancy sports car that combines speed and luxury. It's designed for a comfortable driving experience and has a strong engine.
Car
Mercedes-Benz SL60 AMG
The SL60 is a model from Mercedes-Benz that combines luxury and sportiness. It's part of a series of cars that are designed for high performance and style.
Car
Mercedes-Benz SL63 AMG
The SL63 is a sportier version of the SL-Class from Mercedes-Benz. It has a more powerful engine and is designed for better performance on the road.
Car
Mercedes-Benz SL65 AMG
The SL65 is a more powerful and luxurious version of the SL-Class. It usually has a bigger engine and more features than the SL60 and SL63.
Car
Porsche 911
The Porsche 911 is a famous sports car that has been around since the 1960s. It's known for its unique shape and powerful performance, and many car enthusiasts talk about how it has changed and improved over time.
Term
steering feel
Steering feel is how much you can feel the road through the steering wheel. A car with good steering feel makes it easier to control and enjoy driving.
Brand
Stellantis
Stellantis is a large car company that owns many different car brands. It was created when two big car companies joined together, and now it makes cars under several names.
Brand
Peugeot
Peugeot is a car brand from France that makes different types of cars, like small cars and larger ones.
Brand
Jeep
Jeep is a car brand from America that makes tough vehicles, especially ones designed for off-roading.
Car
Porsche Boxster
The Porsche Boxster is a two-seat convertible sports car that first came out in the late 90s. It's loved for its fun driving experience and is often seen as a more budget-friendly option compared to other Porsche models.
Car
Porsche Cayman
The Porsche Cayman is a two-door sports car that looks similar to the Boxster but has a hard roof instead of a convertible top. It's praised for its great handling and speed, making it a favorite among driving enthusiasts.
Car
Porsche Panamera
The Porsche Panamera is a high-end car that has four doors and is designed for both speed and comfort. It's known for being fast and luxurious.
Car
Porsche Cayenne
The Porsche Cayenne is a fancy SUV that combines the features of a sports car with the space of an SUV. The newest versions are electric, meaning they run on batteries instead of gasoline.
Car
Porsche Taycan
The Porsche Taycan is a fast and modern electric car that looks like a sports car. It's part of Porsche's move to make more electric vehicles.
Car
Porsche 928
The Porsche 928 is a luxury sports car that was made from the late 70s to the mid-90s. It has a different design than the typical Porsche, with the engine in the front, and is known for being comfortable and powerful.
Car
Volkswagen Golf
The Volkswagen Golf is a small car that has been popular for many years because it's easy to drive and has a lot of space inside. The Mark 7 model is especially liked for being both fun to drive and good on gas.
Car
Rolls-Royce Rollsroyce Silver
The Rolls-Royce Silver Shadow is a very luxurious car made from the 60s to the 80s. It's famous for its comfortable ride and beautiful interior, making it a symbol of wealth and elegance.
Car
Audi Quattro
The Audi Quattro is a sporty car that was introduced in the early 80s and is famous for its all-wheel-drive system. This feature helps it grip the road better, especially in tough driving conditions.
Car
Audi 90
The Audi 90 is a compact car that was made in the 80s and early 90s. It's known for being well-built and has a special all-wheel-drive system that helps it handle well in different conditions.
Car
Bmw 6
The BMW 6 Series is a stylish luxury car that has been around since the late 70s. The older models, especially from the 80s, are loved for their classic look and smooth driving feel.
Car
Porsche 968
The Porsche 968 is a sporty car that was made in the early 90s. It's appreciated for how well it handles on the road and is considered a great option for those who want something different from other Porsches.
Car
Volkswagen Jetta
The Volkswagen Jetta is a four-door car that's popular for being reliable and practical. The 16-valve model is remembered for being a bit sportier and more fun to drive than the regular versions.
Car
Lotus Elise
The Lotus Elise is a very light and small sports car that focuses on giving you a thrilling driving experience. It's known for being fun to drive because it handles really well on the road.
Car
BMW Z3Ms
The BMW Z3 is a small two-seat convertible car made in the late 90s and early 2000s. It's known for being fun to drive and became famous after appearing in a James Bond movie.
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Did I talk too much?
I can't.
I just let it go.
I was thinking so much.
I didn't know that.
Did I talk too much?
I didn't know that.
I just let it go.
Take a breath.
You're not alone.
Let's talk about what's going on.
Better.
Hello and welcome to the car podcast with Chris Harrington and his friends.
I'm quite concerned because this is episode 75.
Chris Cooper is holding a lage.
You know what that means?
You know what that means?
He can get a bit loose and potty mouth by the end.
So let's go far.
Oh God, Manish has got a red wine.
Manish had a very stressful day getting back from Madrid.
Neil Clifford had a not very stressful day getting back from London.
And I've been in my flat all day because I spent five days in Bonnie, Scotland, where
I watched England get absolutely thumped at Murrayfield, which was the weirdest atmosphere
ever because it's the best atmosphere I've ever experienced in a sports stadium as we
got beaten.
How strange is that?
So to show just how fickle we are and how much we love playing the advocate of the devil,
this week, more is less.
So we've done the less is less.
More is more.
And now Manish is going to start us off with more is less.
So I think there's a car.
There's just one car.
It's always so dear to me that absolutely personifies more is less.
And that is the evolution of the Qantas.
And if you look at the very, very first one, you go back to the first one, it doesn't have
those great big air boxes at the side.
It's possibly one of just the most exciting, simple wedges.
And perhaps the writing was on the wall and that car couldn't be cooled down enough.
So they had to put those two boxes on, which actually I quite like.
I quite like those two boxes.
And you have the LP 400.
Now it came.
And I think it's an object of incredible beauty.
The tires aren't too wide.
I don't think it looks that boxy actually.
I think if you look at it carefully, you can see the curves that Gandini puts in.
You look at that beautiful rear wheel.
It's a kind of ellipse, but with the edge cut off.
I mean, the front wheel, yeah, it's a proper round wheel arch.
You know, the roof, the little periscopio part.
It's a beautiful thing.
And then it starts to go wrong.
They make the, it was the 400S.
They just called it the S.
And they started putting bloody boxes all over it.
First starting with the wheel arches.
And then you get the wall-to-wall titration.
Then you get the wing on the back.
Then you get the 5,000, the 5,000S.
Then you get the quadruple valve with a hump over the engine hood.
It just, this car just gets more and more and more absurd the more they add to it.
But just when you think they couldn't drag it any lower,
they create the anniversary edition.
And that is, it's a sack of shit.
It's my only, it's an absolute, it's an abomination.
If you just look at the original Gandini car
and then you look at this thing with its
bizarre, striked air intakes, that integrated box.
It, what a mess.
Designed famously by who?
Designed famously by who?
By darkness.
Yes.
Well, you know, given a brief and got paid for it.
And did they all sell?
Does anyone even know?
Did they all sell?
Yeah.
One of them to 25?
Those days Lamborghini just made what they could make.
There was no, they didn't say we're going to make 3,000.
They just made what they, is this post-Mimran?
Is it that sort of, yeah, probably is, isn't it?
It just, that car, it just, you know,
if you just put all the silhouettes side by side,
you would see very, very beautifully how over a period of 25 years,
more is definitely less.
It's supposed to be.
I forgot my factoid at the beginning of this.
I want to get it in now.
This is a really good one.
It was posted.
It was sent to Neil Clifford by Jeremy.
To stop Bentley's logo from being copied,
they made it asymmetric.
Count the number of feathers and you'll see that the right side has 10
and the left side has 11.
Jeremy, we love that shit.
Sorry to interrupt there.
Let's go straight back to Neil.
Well, I agree with you, Manich, really, on the anniversary,
but isn't it supposed to be in a bit like a 512 TR?
Isn't it supposed to be a better car, the anniversary?
Wasn't it sort of, maybe it was made uglier,
but also made better to drive and the engine was better?
Who was the test driver?
What was his name?
Jerry Evans, Hal Boney.
Hal Boney.
When he was asked which one is the Countach for you,
he says it's the LP 400.
He feels that the tyres give you just the right amount of grip
and the car had just the right amount of power and it was a challenge.
It was something that he still enjoys and I think by the end,
those things were just heavy washing machines, weren't they?
Horrible.
It's funny, isn't it?
I'm not going to question my Boney's opinion,
but I thought a 5000.
I like the Quattrovalvole and I like the way it looks
because I think that was my poster car.
Exactly.
This is the strange thing.
When I first saw a 400, it looked weird to me.
It looked too skinny and it looked a bit emaciated
and it took me a while and a bit of age
to appreciate the beauty and simplicity of the lines
because I love the wide-bodied Quattrovalvole.
That was the Athena poster, wasn't it?
I only had the Athena poster guy's kuntash,
the Blackwood Blackcar, right-hand drive.
I stupidly sold it.
Harvey, now at RM, bastard,
he bought it off me and he shouldn't have done.
He should have persuaded me to keep it even though I hated it.
Buy it back, Neil. Go on.
No, it's about seven times the price now.
There they are.
Morris Les, Chris Cooper.
Do you know when I realised this was true?
It was last Saturday when I was actually in the house by myself
and Lynn was away somewhere on the weekend.
Boys were both doing their things.
I was at a really, really bastard week
and I thought, you know what?
I'm going to treat myself.
I'm going to do a guilty speak with it.
I'm going to order a burger.
A few.
I'm going to order a burger from one of those app things on here.
And like everything in modern life,
it says to you, would you like extra?
Would you like an extra patty?
An extra slice of...
I thought, well, that's brilliant.
So I went on to the five guys burger thing.
Other burger surveys are available.
Lovely.
And I thought, I'm going to get the burger
because you got your last order,
which is a great thing.
Could you want to add a bit more?
So I thought, well, it's bound to be better.
Adding another slice of meat to it.
And it ruined it.
It's just too much.
It had a catastrophic...
I said catastrophic.
It was still a burger.
It was lovely.
And I had a lovely Saturday night
watching a rerun of slow horses or something like that by myself.
It was a real, like just bit of me time.
It was really nice.
And the car.
This is how fickle we are.
The car that I thought about when I was having that burger
and I thought, I was wrong about that.
It's that one.
Again, it's the one I thought more is more.
I'll change my mind.
I think that is too much.
More is less.
But there is one car that I think...
And this is all first world problems, isn't it?
Where you think it's bound to make it better,
but it doesn't.
A normal full-size Range Rover
with the very, very powerful petrol engines
don't work.
More is less.
Because it's too much power
and the body's got too much pitch
and dive and roll.
And how often, even by yourself,
would you use full throttle,
let alone with anybody else in there?
Diesel engines and those big ranges,
it's fine.
Big petrol, supercharged,
turbocharged engines as well.
So thank you, five guys
and Deliveroo
for proving and reminding to me
that actually more can be less.
Well...
Thank you for confirming
that, you know, next week your opinions will be complete.
Yeah.
Yes.
I guarantee it.
There's something very
poignant in your burger comparison there.
There is.
I'll tell you why.
Because it's not just
more.
It's about upsetting the balance of components.
That's why I chose it.
And I think you're quite right.
Because what happens is you realise that whoever
signed off the five guys burger
really knew what they were doing.
Because when you bite into it, you get just the right amount of squish.
The right amount of meat,
cheese, bread and everything else.
And if you put an extra patty in there,
suddenly it just becomes a meat.
It's not a burger, it's a meat.
Exactly.
And I think cars can be like this.
If you over egg them in certain areas,
you know, if you go too much engine, too much
suspension, not normally those things,
too much exhaust.
I think the exhaust was just too loud.
Yeah.
And actually it just took over.
So more was less.
Where's Neil Clifford on this?
I think the burger analogy could be
the analogy of the year.
Definitely.
It's so good.
We all, we all...
It all just made so much sense
when you mentioned the word burger.
We like he's nailed it.
It's amazing.
My analogy is
the absolutely bloody awful
70th anniversary
Defender V8.
Yes.
That was made by,
bless them,
Land Rover Classic.
Brilliant idea.
That's a very good example.
It looked like they were making
the perfect Defender.
We all got so excited.
Bit of a silly bloody price.
But anyway, this was going to be a keeper.
It would just be incredible.
It's the last proper Defender.
They've taken the V8 from the Jaguar
or whatever it was,
and they're making it by hand
and bespoke,
and it's all wonderful.
It was crap.
Because it wasn't balanced.
There were three burgers in the bun.
Because that's such an over-engined car.
And I knew it.
I went up to wherever that Lamington
Spa or wherever that lovely
Classic Jaguar Land Rover
place is.
Very excited.
With Emma.
Oh my God.
We've got our forever Defender.
This is going to be amazing.
Literally, by the time we got to the M40
going south,
I'm like,
oh Christ,
this thing.
This is really crap.
I thought it was going to be the British G-Wagon.
And it's like a TR7
with a V12 in it,
with an automatic gearbox.
It was really bad.
And I mean, they still hold their money, those things.
So maybe, I think they're like boomerangs.
I think people buy them with excitement
and then they don't keep them,
or they don't drive them,
or they think it's an investment,
and therefore don't drive them,
or they sell them on.
Yeah, so that was definitely,
whatever this thing is,
more is less.
That was the car for me.
And also wheels.
I'd like to add wheels.
You can really get it wrong on wheels.
Massively.
If you, you know,
oh, I'm going to get the 20 ones,
even though the standard's 19s,
or I'm going to get the flashy ones.
Always go for the basic wheel.
I think in the end,
it looks better
than the optional wheel.
I think you might be right.
That's a big topic.
By the way, go and see
a 599 with the rare standard wheel.
There's about four of them
with the living on the standard wheel.
They look superb.
Yes, they do.
As does the F12
on that basic dentist,
German dentist spec,
where he walked in and said,
I want a Ferrari F12.
Please do not sell me any options.
I do not care for them.
I think there's one country's got
a bit of a problem with more is less,
and it consistently gets it wrong.
And that is Germany.
So quite often,
it makes a super duper variant
of a car that's already very good.
And that super duper variant
only serves to remind us how good
the existing one was.
So E32 BMW 7 Series,
they bought out the Majestic 750
with the V12.
But most people,
if you go back and read the reports
and if you've drive them,
the 735i is a sweeter car.
It's just a nicer, better balanced car.
Yes.
Howdy did the same with the W12 A8.
There's so many examples of...
It's like the Peter Principle with cars.
Each model range is promoted
to its level of...
Incompetence.
What's the phrase?
Inability or something like that.
The idea that you would get promoted
to the point where you're no good at your job.
I think the best one I've ever driven
by some margin was the previous generation G-Wagen.
There was a V12 G65.
What's that?
And they made very few of them.
They had about 630 horsepower,
but it had so much torque.
It was a twin-turbo V12
that you could feel the chassis rails
twisting when you're accelerated.
And I remember being in Southern Germany
with Nilo filming it.
And I thought the car was broken.
But actually, the calibration
on the electronic safety systems
was so worried about everything
that if you just accelerated half throttle,
the yellow light would flash and it would just cut everything.
It just felt like a sort of tuner car.
So it really was.
More was so much less.
I think the SL repeatedly did this as well.
An SL500 is a sweet car.
The SL60, if you've driven one,
they're not what you think they're going to be.
SL63 that Chris has got is a car.
The 65 version of that.
It's a bit of a folly, really.
The sweet spot tends to be one run down
from the top of the ladder.
SL60, all you want is the badge.
Everything else is not as good.
You just want the badge.
And the exhaust tips.
You want the exhaust tips as well.
The square exhaust tips, yeah.
They look good.
I mean, sometimes more can be more.
But more, I think in Germany,
quite often it's a little bit less.
The 911 is confusing.
It goes through different periods.
There's definitely a period for a long time
when the turbo was the on paper car you wanted.
But in reality, you just wanted a career.
You know, a little C2 on the smaller wheels
was the sweeter car.
Or it was the one that if you were talking to your friend,
if you wanted to look like a real enthusiast,
you'd always say, yeah, I've got the baby car.
The intuition being I could afford a turbo,
but I prefer the steering feel.
Or some wank like that.
But actually, these days, the turbo is so mega.
I think if you could, you just have a turbo
when you're just a monstrous car.
So I think that does ever flow.
But yeah, there's a lot of these German makers
always make one silly version
that reminds you how good the previous top of the range was.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Here we go.
I've lost the agenda.
I've screenshot the wrong thing.
A bit of news.
A bit of news.
A little update.
Do some news.
Here we go.
Do some news.
Let's go to Chris Cooper first.
So I thought we'd have a little bit of a quick quiz.
Oh, here we go.
Because in the news last week,
as in the papers again of FT this morning,
Stellantis has written off 25 billion or whatever it is
in the reversal of their EV strategy.
Car makers generally have written off nearly 100 billion.
Chris, you were saying before we started
that when you add it all up, equity loss, everybody's right off.
The total cost of the flip-flopping on strategy could be a trillion.
And we talked last week about Stellantis.
And Neil, you said,
well, they only make shit cars or something like that.
I'm probably overplaying what you said.
Seven.
I thought we have a little game to see,
can we guess how many brands Stellantis has got?
Actually, what are they?
Oh, my God.
Mr. Harris, you go first.
Give me a Stellantis brand.
There are 15.
Okay.
I'll list them all.
I'll go fear.
We've got to go one each round the square.
Okay.
15.
Do I fear it?
Yep.
Neil.
How from there?
Yep.
Manish.
Peugeot.
Yep.
Chris.
How about you, Cooper?
Maserati.
Oh, you've got the list.
Maserati.
Yeah, Maserati.
Voxel.
Yep.
Manish.
So trend.
So trend.
Mr. Harris.
Is that Peugeot?
Yeah.
You've got that.
Iveco.
No.
Don't know that.
Chrysler.
Yep.
Neil.
Jeep.
Yep.
Manish.
Ooh.
I was going to say Jeep.
Come on.
In America.
Chrysler.
Jeep.
Peugeot.
Citroen.
You're missing one obvious one.
Two obvious ones.
Peugeot.
Citroen.
Italian.
Yep.
There's an obvious Italian one.
Italian one.
Did you say alpha?
Yeah, he's got that.
There's another obvious Italian one.
It still exists.
Come on.
Luncher.
Yep.
Yes.
Thank you.
What are we up to?
We've got one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.
We've got nine out of the technically 16.
15, 16.
I'll give you the rest.
More Americans.
More Americans.
So the ones you're missing, the obvious one you're missing.
Opal.
Yeah.
Dodge.
Yeah.
I just said dodge.
Did you?
Sorry, Neil.
Neil, you won this.
And the other ones are sort of a bit irritating.
A bath is a brand.
DS.
The posh bit of Citroen.
Yes.
Ram Trucks, which is kind of a sub-brand of Dodge.
Dodge.
And I've forgotten this.
Solantis owns a 51% stake in Leap Motor, the Chinese EV maker.
So that's one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine,
10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15 brands.
Do you think that's too many?
I think it probably is.
It could all be.
If you are, if you are still listening to this podcast now,
thank you very much for your support.
Al Khan, Mr. Al Khan.
We're back to John.
We've really pushed you.
We've really pushed you to the edge there.
So Chris Cooper is now going to stand up
because he's wearing a jockstrap.
So you can look at that for a few minutes
just to bring the audience back in.
A bit of eye candy.
That's all mine.
Oh, Jesus, it's a cold day.
Right. So let's, we're never doing the news again.
I'll tell you about this.
So I'll tell you about my private plate very quickly.
I'm not sure if it's been resolved.
I think I've had a missed phone call.
So I bought a prior just to let you know.
Word of warning.
I've never bought a personalized number plate before.
I've bought cars that have them on.
And I've had someone at the garage stick a plate on a car for me
that I didn't want people to see the other number plate on it
for various reasons.
But I wanted to buy a funny number plate
for the fat ice race.
So I went through red transfers.
And I just bit, I just clicked on it
and it was about 700 pounds or 800 pounds.
It's quite a lot of money for me.
And I just thought, well, that'd be good fun.
And I got the place made out,
waited for the retention certificate to come through.
And I didn't have any emails or anything.
I just had a voicemail on my phone a few days later
because I was overseas just saying, oh, sorry, you didn't buy it.
I went, oh, how's that?
And you've taken the money from my account.
They went, no, we're going to refund it.
It wasn't for sale.
The person selling it decided not to sell it.
What?
So just a word of warning out there.
What these things aren't always for sale.
They're not just, they're sort of,
you could be a private puncher and use it as a listing,
like an SLR position for a number plate.
And if it was a fixed price and you bid on it,
you don't necessarily buy it,
but they do take the money from your account.
And then they say to you afterwards, oh, sorry, you didn't buy it.
But the default is we'll take your money.
Then we'll decide afterwards.
I didn't like it really.
I think they're trying to resolve it.
But I, yeah, I thought it was really a very strange way to trans out.
I've never had that before.
Did you get your money back?
Sorry.
Did you get your money back?
Money has come back.
Yeah.
Money has come back now.
Yeah.
Which is for absolutely.
I have had that.
I've had that before.
And you, because on certain,
we won't mention the websites,
but on certain websites that are sort of related to things like
registration plates,
it says inquire,
which therefore you know that that is not for owned.
But then if it says buy me or buy now,
you assume that that one,
either they own or they're,
because I do wonder a little bit that it's a bit like Stellantis.
This, this number plate thing that there are all these different
websites,
but actually there is like a Mr. Big of number plates and one guy,
a thousand computers all around his desk
and all the sales are coming in.
And he's,
because I think they're brilliant mathematicians,
these guys,
you know,
put the prices up on their website,
change the prices.
I think the price has changed all the time.
It's a bit like buying a Ryanair ticket, you watch them and watch them.
But when I've had that before where you says buy now and I think, oh, I quite like that
plate, some stupid plate that I'm never really going to ever get my money back, but it's
not a lot of money, 500 quid or 300 quid, goes with the car, bit quirky, not too knobby
but a little bit funny or whatever, I know private price are a bit crap anyway.
And they then email you the next day and say, I'm sorry, the owner's decided or we
can't get hold of the owner.
So it is you've got to be a little bit careful that you think you own it, as Chris said,
but sometimes you don't.
So I suppose if I just got a message saying, bad luck, it wasn't for sale, I wouldn't
give a shit, but they took the money.
That's the bit I didn't like.
I thought that was a bit naughty.
Yeah.
And I suppose maybe this is a segue into another subject for another week.
Stuff you've never done before, but you've really plucked up the courage to have a go
and it blows up in your face.
Like I probably look like I'm very sneery about number plates.
I don't really like them.
So I'm sitting there going, I shouldn't be doing this.
I shouldn't be doing this.
Goes against everything that I thought I stood for, but I'm going to have a go because
everyone has these things.
It could be quite good fun to put this place on this car.
Let's have a go.
Then it all went to shit.
So I'll never buy another number player.
Just a really.
It's like waiting, you know, you've never seen the first fish dish you ordered off.
My sister was successful in buying a number plate for her golf.
She's a GP.
And every time I see this car, I think she has to get her ex-head examined.
Her registration plate, and I kid you not, reads sick doctor.
And I don't want one of those.
Do you, as my GP?
What does it say in the number plate?
DR. Her registration plate is sick doctor.
Why would you want a sick doctor?
It's actually quite, quite like that.
God, I'll tell her.
So there you go.
Just everyone, if you like these number plates, I get it.
But just, just watch out for the other thing.
Sorry, I do own a couple of number plates.
And my number, man, let me finish, my number plates, I can put them on to these famous
websites that we all know, and they're there for sale.
Yeah.
They're there for sale.
And no one's ever contacted me about, can I put your number plate up on the website?
And there, but that's quite cheeky.
That is cheeky.
I suspect it's because it's not a regulated sector.
And there's this odd, some people who listen to this will know this better than me.
But technically, you don't own a number plate.
They remain the property of the, in the UK, of the driver and vehicle licensing agency.
Every country, there must work differently in different countries.
But in the UK, they're issued by the DVLA, they remain the property of DVLA.
What people are buying and selling is the right to use them or assign them to a vehicle.
And if they have an interesting number, then there's a value attached to
selling that right of assignment, whatever it is, blah, blah, blah.
But it does appear to be just an absolute, I've, one of these years ago,
I had a very similar experience, Chris, to you.
I suspect with the same firm.
And since then, they've been texting me a lot recently.
And they'll send me a number plate, which sort of vaguely approximates to my surname,
but only if you're looking at it from Mars.
And then the next week, the price of that will have gone up.
I'm thinking, that's really interesting.
Am I, is that meant to attempt to think, if you necessarily buy it now, it'll be sold?
I thought, well, I didn't want it last week when it was quite cheap.
And now I definitely don't want it.
Very odd algorithm.
It might be, as you say, the Mr. Big with his fluffy white cat.
I think there's just one bloke.
Is it one bloke, mate?
He doesn't run the DVLA website, does he?
No, I hope not.
That's the one thing he doesn't do.
And that, that's...
If you go to France, you want these mental eucalyptus tissues.
They are absolutely superb.
Fully...
If you've got a cold arm...
Did you notice, we need to talk about that.
Everyday items that are branded with some of our favourite cars,
as your little balsam-infused tissues were.
I noticed.
So the number plate thing, I think, let me just wrap that one up.
I don't have a problem with any of it.
I don't actually have a problem with speculative listing number plates that aren't yours.
Because if someone might get 100 grand for a plate, they never thought they might get an offer.
So all that stuff, I don't mind.
And the world, an unregulated world, I prefer to regulate it one anyway.
But I...
But I don't think, I don't think you could take money for something that was never for sale
and then just go, ooh, sorry, we'll give you the money back.
I think that's naughty.
It's naughty.
I think that's a bit naughty.
And also, I think what you should be told, probably is,
that you're not going, you've not bought this till you've bought it.
You know, till the paperwork lands, you haven't bought it.
I think the assumption is that when you press, when you press go,
and then I send all my, maybe I'm pissed off because I send all my mates notes going,
oh boy, it's really cool play.
And I hadn't bought stuff though.
I think if it said bid now or inquire,
the chances of you doing that is like 5%.
Yeah, it's like POA, isn't it?
Yeah, you don't inquire, you don't bother.
If you think you can buy it, and maybe they're obviously taking a punt, aren't they,
that they think, OK, well, we've done a calculation.
We've got our algorithm, it's told us roughly how much that plate is worth
because it's got a single digit and three letters and they're all about this
unless there's like, cock or some silly word in it or something.
So they know roughly how much it is and then they take a punt
and they email the people.
And if they can't, probably, most importantly, probably can't get all of them
because I haven't registered with any of these websites,
but the number plates are on there.
I'm not having a massive go, I'm just something stroppy, man.
Interesting, interesting.
Stuff that you find a bit irritating, that's what that is, doesn't ruin your week.
Now, this one is controversial.
Has Porsche gone a little bit boring?
Oh, oh, Neil Clifford.
I've visited three Porsche dealerships in the last
month or two and I came away feeling very
weary and
sad and a little depressed
about a company and a mark and a, you know, car thing that I adore
that it all felt a little bit miserable in the showroom.
And it felt a little bit miserable because you walk in
and they're trying to sell you these electric things
and customers don't want the electric things.
They've brilliantly five years ago, strategically said, I'm sure,
we're going to be the first, we're going to be the best, you know,
we've got to take on Elon.
Porsche is the best automotive brand.
We're going to double down, triple down on electric.
We're going to spend 20 billion.
We're going to build all these factories and we're going to be
the first out of the block and then suddenly no one wants them
to the demand that was calculated in the spreadsheet.
And then half of the cars they did sell are all coming back under warranty
or they, you know, someone paid 80 grand for a take on.
And if you're not even going to get a bid off the dealer,
it's going to be 30 grand and you're going to be annoyed
and you've lost money or the car's broken down or it's under warranty.
You just felt this heavy cloud of angst in the dealership.
But then it's reflected in the cars because suddenly
this is my take on it on maybe being a bit miserable.
When I used to, you know, when would I first really walked into showrooms
in a Porsche 993, I suppose, 993 was my first mid 90s, couldn't afford one.
But I went in there and nicked the brochures and, you know,
I had a kick around and sat in one and oh, my God, one day, one day
and the quality of this thing.
And it was aspirational.
It was like a dream thing for me.
And now you walk in now, of course, maybe I'm more used to it
and maybe other people have the different feelings they walk in.
But all the cars are gray.
There's no exciting colours.
The most interesting things are the bloody key rings and the cups.
The merge and then I look at the model line up.
And of course, we can understand maybe why,
because they've been so sort of diverted by this electric thing.
There's not many interesting cars.
What are we going to go and buy there?
If we won the lottery or got a big bonus or your uncle Reg died
and he left you 150 grand, what are you going to walk in there and buy?
No, maybe. Maybe I'm wrong.
Maybe you are going to walk in and say, please, sir, can you get me a touring
and I want the rear seats and the salesman is going to say, sorry about that.
We can't get you one of those, but we can sell you an electric mechan,
which we can't actually sell you anything of what you actually want to buy.
But where are the new exciting cars?
Where's the where's the eight, four, nine
Tester Rosser from Porsche at four or five hundred grand?
That's a mini 911 or where is the nine to eight?
Or where is the mini Boxster RS thing that's like limited edition?
Or where's the McCann GT?
I think it's all gone a bit flat as a pancake.
And I'm very and then the quality.
You know, I know there was that transition from 993 to 996,
wasn't there, where you thought, you know, I know it's a better car
and the magazine says it's a better car, but they've used quite shit plastic.
Yeah. That's all happened all over again.
And unless you specify extra, extra, extra, extra leather,
it's the inside of those cars looks like a bloody four tourist.
Yeah. You know, it looks cheap and the plastic looks cheap.
And I'm like, oh, my God, at least Ferrari are having a go.
We can criticise Ferrari for what their cars look like.
And they're not so chic and pinaforener of bring back pinaforener
and fucking Luca Monticello and all that bollocks.
But the truth is, at least they're having a go.
At least the cars look like they're designing for the future.
Porsche look like they've, you know, their brain has fallen out.
So what do you think about that?
Yes, that's a lot to digest.
And I think most of it is is very true.
I think I think the great car companies are like human beings
and their lives are soap operas and they go through these periods
of of struggling and they renew and then they succeed and they knock it out the park.
But there's always a sort of generational blip with Porsche.
And I think we're just going through one now.
They had it 20 years ago, a bit more.
And they had it 10 years before that and they famously.
So yeah, Mr.
Mr. Blumer bet the bet the house on electric and it didn't work.
So all the money that would have gone into designing a really
the thing that would solve the problem is this, if there was a really cool,
pretty new Boxster Cayman coming out now that had a really clever
I.C.E. or maybe a mild hybrid engine that was really fast and was
1,400 kilograms or 500 kilograms, you'd be going,
I've just been to the Porsche dealer.
You won't believe how cool this little sports car is.
It would change everything.
But the 911 has become a very big, very expensive product.
And I don't think the 992 is the greatest 911.
I still think it's a fabulous car.
Don't get me wrong.
But I don't think it's it's the greatest 911.
It's a big car now as well.
And it's you've chosen a very unfortunate point in the model cycle,
certainly, you know, Panamera is no longer,
you can't get the sausage anymore, which is a real shame.
The new Cayenne is just an electric behemoth.
And you can't get the new Taycan is
so the new McCann is another electric vehicle.
That it looks like the Boxster Cayman might not even come to market,
which I think is a finished car.
That's unprecedented, you know, you finish a car and you don't sell it.
We don't know that for a fact yet, but I'm hearing that might be the case.
So I think they're in a really tricky position.
But as Dereem once said,
they only get better.
Yeah, I think I think if I'm looking in the positive side,
Porsche is one of those companies that when it when it needs to recover,
it does slightly wild things.
You get five, nine, you get nine, eight teams.
You get really stuff.
And I personally think.
I've I probably haven't said this public enough.
I think the GT three should be the normal nine eleven.
I think I think there's a whole load of shit going on out there.
I think I think there should be fewer nine elevens.
I just think that if you want to you either have a turbo or a GT three
and stuff all the other or the long name bullshit, I can't be bothered with it.
And don't limit the numbers.
Make 30,000 of bloody things.
And they should depreciate like normal cars.
Get on with it. That's what it should be really.
So isn't it sad to see it's a bit like going to see your mate
who started his own business ten years ago and he's making all the money.
You know, he's sitting there and he's working every Sunday
and he's not going so well and he's he's a bit tough.
I think you walk in.
I went to a Porsche did a ship before Christmas and it was tough.
But there we go. There he is. Good lad.
He looks like a robber.
Vincent the robber. I I I get it.
But it's unfortunate timing in the model cycle, but they will recover.
They will recover and they'll give us some cool shit.
I know they will.
You think you just do wonder about Neil would have been twenty eight
in the mid nineties and you do wonder whether twenty eight year olds
do walk into Porsche dealerships now and kick the tires
and try to, you know, block a test drive or just sit in one.
And, you know, something in my little internal
soul says they probably don't not in the same not in the same way.
I mean, there was such extraordinarily aspirational cars
in the mid late 80s, early 90s.
There were two other things that you said, Chris, in the past,
which is when you sort of get something so right so early,
which is what the nine eleven was.
You know, it's all very asymptotic, isn't it?
You're just trying to get better and better and better.
But, you know, you know, you're never going to reach perfection.
But that journey, maybe over the last 10 or 15 years, has actually been
not that great.
And that's the thing that you're feeling, you know, 99 percent of the curve
is something Neil experienced maybe by the time you were forty five, Neil, or, you know,
and that that last tiny bit is just not doing it for you anymore.
And then we always point out, you know, these cars are getting bigger and bigger.
I'm always blown away by a Porsche from twenty twenty five
compared to a Porsche from nineteen sixty seven.
You look at the size, but then you pointed out, hey, they're bigger,
but, you know, compared to the old turbos, for example, they don't have turbo lag.
They're actually extremely well built.
They've got so many systems on them that it feel like a big, heavy car anymore.
And then, you know, they're a purest thing.
Yeah, but you've got a lot of systems doing this.
There was something rather wonderful about the engine there.
And there was something rather wonderful about the way you could change gears.
There was something wonderful about the way the things spooled up.
And I, you know, I do wonder the more scary thing for me, rather than going
through a difficult period, is if this is not a difficult period manifest by
the fact that, you know, they've had to divert so much of their brain power
to electricity, but much more a sort of generational thing
that younger people are just not interested in the product in that same
massively aspirational way. I may be wrong.
I think that I'm not sure that's right.
Good. I agree with that.
I'm not sure. So my take on this.
Thank you. Sorry. Chris Cooper needs to have his go here. Sorry.
In the last 30 years, actually, yeah, 30 odd years, maybe 29 years,
Porsche has introduced the Cayenne, Cayman, boxed with the roof.
Woody had that, Panamera, McCann and Taycan.
If they'd started 30 years ago with that product range, it wouldn't be Porsche.
It could be something else.
And the 9-11, when, I mean, Neil's story is very similar to mine.
I mean, I remember, you know, we talked about it before.
You all do, we all try and do something before we can afford it.
You go into a Porsche dealer well before you know you really got a right to be there.
It's human nature.
And when I, my first 9-11 was a 993 in 1997, it was a 993 C2S.
Yeah. And it's the one they had on the dealership.
It was slightly, it was a two-wheel drive with wide rear arches.
I couldn't have been more excited and happy and made up. My life is complete.
I didn't care there was a turbo. In other words, the basic 9-11 was a great 9-11.
And now it doesn't feel that way unless you have a GT3 or one of the turbos.
You think, well, actually, I've kind of not bought, I've not really bought a 9-11.
And I think that's wrong. And I, so Chris, I agree with you.
I think the GT3 should be the 9-11.
Because when 30 years ago, when we first started thinking about them,
to us, that's how they felt. And now they don't.
And I think the third thing, and I think you've already said it,
they need, I'm not a retailer, Neil, you're a retailer.
You and I were one of those dealers together the other weekend.
And we both said they need a new product.
From a retail point of view, it's staggering how little new product at the heart of the brand
they've had in 30 years. Is it a 968? Is it a 928?
You know, the Panamera, okay, perhaps he didn't do a Panamera-based thing,
because that's like a continental and that encroaches on Bentley.
But hey, live a little, you're quite clever at what you do.
And I just wonder whether there's been this corporate assumption that we've got a 9-11,
we'll protect that, have the specials and the turbos and all those kind of things,
and the mystique about the waiting list of a GT3 and residuals of that.
And they had to go large on EV, they thought, because that's where the world was going.
But for 30 years worth of product, to basically have had nothing new and exciting
other than the Cayman, which they already had, it was a Boxster with a lid.
30 years, bloody hell, when you say it like that, you think, right, okay.
We'll come over, Stuttgart, and we'll spend half a day, and we'll think about the new product.
But what I wanted from Porsche, but I couldn't get one, was a Dakar.
I thought, I thought, whatever, I thought Dakar is cool.
Yeah, that's a good point.
And I'm sure it's about rainpower and funding, and I'm sure this, whatever,
eight or nine billion that they've allocated to basically change direction,
means that in the next three or four years, we all hope there's going to be a raft of new,
exciting things. When I was at the dealer recently, and I saw, I think it was the
McCann Turbo, and no, a McCann Electric, brand new one, and it had turbo written on the back.
And I'm like, why is it got turbo written on there? Hasn't got turbo? Turbo is a trim level now, sir.
And I'm like, when they launched that car, that was so controversial. I mean, that was,
I think a bit of piston heads actually exploded. I think there was actually spit
coming out of my computer as the pH massive. But I'll tell you something about Porsche that
I find fascinating. If you've interacted with them for decades, you meet board members,
and you meet people in senior positions, and you meet people that actually define the product
strategy. The 911 is the golden goose, it's everything. It doesn't always make the most
money, but I know it's what defines the company. And they know that the health of the company can
really be diagnosed through the health of the 911. It's the metaphor for Porsche. It is Porsche.
And, you know, when the car gets a bit big, and there are 47 model variants of the 911,
history tells us that it's probably going, it's gone a bit too far. But most companies have to
go a bit too far before they rain themselves back in. But there is something about the 911 that
I've always disagreed with Porsche. It's never wanted to really compete with its own car. So
anything else it did had to basically give Lord 911 a bit of space. If you do a GT4,
it can't be faster GT3. If you do any kind of car, the 911 has got to be left in its own space.
I fundamentally disagree with that. I think competition is everything. If I was Porsche,
I'd have had a Skunk Works outfit in Weissach trying to develop a car to beat the 911 myself.
And I'd have made it because the one thing that would have happened is the 911 would have got
better and better and better. And I think that would be, that's the level of competitive internal
thinking that I wish that maybe they'd assumed a while ago. Because at the moment, there's no
competition, as you say. It's just that the 911 tries to be, it's trying, for the next three
years or four years, the 911 will have to be a Cayman, a Boxster, a 911, and it'll have to be a
928. And it has to be a 968. And it can't be all those things. That's a very good analogy and summary.
So, can someone have a new idea? No one, no one has ever used that clock thing.
On top of the dash. You press it once and go, oh, look, it's all going around.
Then you never touch it ever again. There must be someone responsible for new ideas there that
to get us excited. We're easily excitable. Doesn't take much.
Look at the for now, for now, just by a used one. And I'm sure good times will return also.
If you drive a new GTS, it's pretty magnificent, the technology and the turbo is a belter. And,
you know, if you're going to fall an ST, great. But yeah, it's tough times for them, but they've
looked in the mirror. And I think it sounds like they're about to make a very, very brave decision
on a particular car. Well, I suppose they're back to 1993, aren't they? The lowest production
period. I'm sure, you know, because they came right out the traps brilliantly, didn't they?
So we all keep our fingers crossed that exactly the same that the 994 or whatever's coming or
other models now they're designing. We're going to get a 968 Turbo S style car.
Yes, they're going to make 12 of them. Be careful. My lovely, sure microphone had unscrewed itself
and in a protest at my shit verbiage had turned itself 180 against, it literally had
Kidd protested. He just did this. He went
No. Bastard. Right.
Let's move on. Thank you Chris Cooper for sending me a WhatsApp call and we can't fucking hear you.
The pleasure for using a car, did everyone answer that? We didn't we? The pleasure for using a car
as it was designed. I love this. This is brilliant. I've got one you won't beat.
I'm going to go first to Chris Cooper. This is about the undiluted knowledge and certainty
that somebody somewhere, a whole bunch of people were thinking about how to make you feel good
at a particular set of circumstances and those circumstances could be really narrow
or really, really broad. So this is not just extreme cars. I've said this before. I think the
VW Golf Mark 7 1.4 TSI is an extraordinary car because the people who made it thought about
so many different scenarios in your life, whether you're driving down the motorway,
trying to get through town, going out for an evening on a bumpy country road where you'd
appreciate ride control and suspension and all those kind of things. And I think that
knowledge, that understanding is the absolute expression of the pleasure and you know
somebody somewhere knows exactly how I feel right now. I'm doing exactly what they wanted.
If I had to think of one car, I mean the obvious car is a GT3 RS, 911,
despite what we talked about. Whereas when you're driving one of those on the Nurburgring,
you know, you know there is nothing else in the world for a moment that matters other than
how this car goes round a hallowed tarmac, is it? But the one I chew-
Oh my god, you were designed to do this. Yeah and the knowledge of, I've distilled the pleasure
and the thrill of driving to the coming together of that car and this piece of road. And that's
exactly what it was designed to do and nothing else matters. If I had to choose one though,
and I know this is the Marmite bit because I know Chris, you don't, you hate this. Well,
that may be too strong a word. I know you're not a big fan. It's a Defender, 100%. When the first
time I drove a Defender off-road, suddenly it all made sense. I think this, the pleasure of using
a car as it was designed separates the, why did it feel in those other circumstances as a really
irritating and frustrating thing. Good point. But now it feels perfect and unimaginably
impossible to better. Yeah, I like that. And a Defender, when I first drove a Defender off-road,
I thought, God, the Wilkes Brothers and all that stuff, they were right. I think this is a great,
we could, we should do it every week this question, it's fantastic. Can we have enough Defender
out there? So we move on. Let's go to Neil Clifford, hopefully we'll recover the situation.
I think this is lovely. The only thing that I've never done is enjoyed a car that's designed for
the track on the track. I bloody hate it. It's even worse being a passenger, by the way, but I
actually prefer being a passenger because at least as we crash, it's not my fault. But the,
actually, I've got so many different analogies of this, but I'll go to Chris Cooper just a moment
ago. My son owns a 1.4 Golf Mark 7.5. He lives in London. I had to drive it home this evening
because my other son, T-Delivery Vincent, needs to borrow the car. He hasn't got a car himself,
he's just passed his test. So I drove it home tonight, an hour and a half from Farringdon,
pissing with rain, dreadful traffic, you know, A1, M1, M25, A41, an hour and a half,
trying to get back to the podcast. I couldn't have been happier. It honestly is such a fabulous car
that it will go as the Guinness Book of Records as the best ever car. I think so.
I said to my wife, honestly, darling, that car is just fabulous. The build quality,
the ride, all of the buttons are in a perfect place. Everything is illuminated correctly.
We know it's the last of Piek, probably, you know, the quality of everything, both what you can see
and what you can't see. It's screwed together. The screws are this long when they can only
get to be that long, but they use the extra long ones instead. It's not been bettered.
No, 100%. It was just a random hour and a half journey in shitty weather, in shitty traffic,
and it was a joy. You're here. Manish.
What the flip side to this, which is the car that you are driven in, or chauffeured in, I should say,
that gives you an absolute sense of occasion, and you just know that this is why this car was built.
And there's one version of this car, which I think you can flip around and drive
and feel just as good driving this car as you do in the back. But it's not my best class to say
these. I think it is the Rolls-Royce Silver Shadow 2. And I think that that car is,
it's just an occasion. There's one round the corner I've seen. It's clapped out at black.
You can still see the hand-painted red line going along the side. I see the sun catch.
It's radiator. And you know a man has bent every one of those to look straight, but they aren't.
The seats, the leather, it's not like being educated on what Ferrari was doing in the early
70s by putting vinyl into their cars where people's bums don't go. This car is leather where you know
no bum will ever see it. The back seat is a sofa. The back seats are sofa. The front seats are huge
easy chairs of the type BA business used to be before the fraud, I think, of the flatbed with
it sort of half-inch thick sponge under your bum. It starts first time round all the time. You sit
in the back of it. You feel like Peter Sellers is going to a film premiere, but you sit and drive this
car. You know, the indicator, you hear this little clunk and there's a click, click, click
as it turns left or right. It's just never been better for what it is, which is a limousine
that you can drive. And I'll tell you what, this could be my next obsession because I just...
On the basis you've answered most questions with this car in the last three years,
I suggest we've got to get you one. They're not that expressive. I think to get this car right
and they'd go on forever. 25. Beautiful, beautiful car. You would go chrome bumpers early car or would
you go later 80s body-coloured car? Chrome bumpers early car. Shadow one. I'm now going to do something
I never thought I'd do. I'm going to get an impression of Chris Cooper. I'm going to lean in,
I'm going to say, you know what this is about, don't you? I'm going to pause for a flex and I'm
going to say, this is about James Bond because that's what this is about. Okay. That's my Chris
Cooper impression. You know what this is about, don't you? Thank you. So, it wasn't meant to be. So,
I think it's having the tool for the job. That's what for me this is about and I love
James Bond films, the car sequences most of the time. They're just so brilliantly childish because
he's always presented with the perfect situation to deploy the thing he's got in his car that's
only useful in one in a billion situations. The idea that when he has to cut a piece of wire
across a car park, the emblem pops out of the car and cuts, it happens to be at the right height.
That would only have been used at that height. If that was an inch or above or below, that would
be no use. And I think maybe one of the joys of being a motor car is that you might be aware that
your car has a skill, but you never really get to use it. And when suddenly you do get to use it,
you're like, wow, no, I get to do it. And I've got the best one of these. It was from my late
dear mummy who went, she was a bit of an old Barbara Cartland style. She was hilarious. She would,
she didn't like horse racing, but she went to Cheltenham once and she was with my father
and they had a B3 Audi 90 Quattro. That fucking thing that was like a bar of soap,
but no boot space. Cool car. And they get there and they're in the car parks, which were not
hard standing and all the people they were with had BMWs. My mother's saying they had
BMWs and they tried to drive away off the wet grass at the end of the day and all the BMWs got stuck
and they put this Audi thing in first gear and it just started to sort of move its wheels,
but it wasn't going anywhere. There's a button behind the gear lever that locks the differential
in those cars, but I don't think anyone ever pressed and my mother remembered or I think one
of them remembered that the salesman had said, you've got this button here and you get stuck,
press that. So they pressed it, it locked the diff and they drove out and everyone else was stuck
in the field. That is very cool. They had the James Bond moment and I think
it's about, this is about finally getting the chance to do what your car can do, which is why
if you, I'll tell you one thing I've got wrong, I've got so many things wrong, but one thing I
really got wrong is I used to get sniffy about these experienced days and you buy a car, you
should take it because if you go to somewhere where they have Land Rover tracks, it's great to
wade the thing up to the doors and to see what it can actually do. If you get a Porsche, go to
Silverstone and skid it about and see what it can actually do because this is really about finding
out what your car can actually do. We live in a time of unprecedented over-engineering. These
things can do shit you can't believe and most of the time, if you just try to look the M4,
you're just scratching at the surface of what it can do and when you get the chance to do it,
do it. If you've got a B3 Audi 90 Quattro, press that button and also if you've got one of those,
can you explain to me that with the headphone sockets and the rear seat? They had headphone
sockets on the rear thing behind the headrests, whatever you call that and I never could work
them in that car. I used to plug my headphones in but I wouldn't get any music coming out.
I'd love to know how that works. Someone's got messages coming in, stop it. It's BloodyJK asking
me if carbon black is worth an eight grand extra. I'm serious. This is the most first world podcast
I've ever heard in my life. Managed to just complain that the seat cushions on BA Business
started a bit thin. The phone off, it's still coming through. I messaged it.
Now we're going to go to our two. Oh, this is good. Is the two car garage the New Zealand one?
Yeah. I don't know how do you turn this shit off? Just press the button on the side.
It's on your, it's coming through your laptop. It's coming through your laptop. It's coming
Just say, Jake, can you fuck off for a minute please? Yes, bless him. By the way, how about two
car garage? Two fun cars, one a classic four seater, brackets daily, one a two seater, both
beautiful enough to make you stop and look back after being parked. That's a really good way to
describe whether you like a car or not. But I always turn around and look at, right, Clifford,
stop your bloody phone. Can't do anything now, can you call him and tell him we're doing important
work? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I will. Both capable of providing great joy on New Zealand and South
Island roads. Budget, £150,000. How much is that in pounds? £66,000. How much?
£66,000. Okay. Manish, you go first, please. Okay, can I just say that I thought the full version
of this two car garage was rather lovely. It was lovely. It is lovely. Yeah. And it's so nice.
Can you read the whole thing out? Man, do you want to read it? Yeah, do you want to read it? But I
think it's beautiful. You read it. You read it. You read it. I wasn't trying to ignore it. I just
which I will do. Give me one second. Here it is. This podcast is the highlight of my Friday evening
New Zealand time of what every episode of your podcast since day one, I was inspired to take
every Friday off and drive the beautiful roads on my doorstep in New Zealand, whatever piece of
tat I purchased last. Thanks for the service you provide to all men with this affliction.
True mental medicine. Currently, I love this. In the stable 67 Merc W108, Idaily, a 59 Alpha
Sprint in a 2005 Boxster. So by the way, how about a silly two car garage that will stretch the
knowledge of the team? And then you added that. I mean, this whole podcast is about personality,
isn't it? And we want to say hello. Hello, Jay. Hello, Jay. Stop texting during the pod.
He called me.
Called you earlier. We were discussing. What were we discussing?
This is right. Manage to get yourself ready. Okay. I am ready. Exactly. Exactly. I'll bring you back
in 20. All right, darling. See you. Bye. Right. He's not going to text any longer.
You call J.K. Darling. Yes. Goodness me. Oh, yeah.
All right. So this is technically a four seater, but it's a coupe. It's kind of been
in love with for a very long time. I don't think I can stop looking at it. Forget about if it was
part, but I found a 1981 BMW 6 Series, a 635 it, it's a five speed manual. And what was so
beautiful about this car, with the number of miles that it done, it's 151,000 kilometers.
He doesn't listen, does he? Rock stars. Do rock stars listen? No. Can we get him on here next
week? So when he texted you, at least we can see what he's bloody doing.
Okay. I think this is just an, it's an object of beauty. Can you see that thing? Silver and
black. That is nice. Yeah. When you see the inside of this car, and it's, they want 32,000 euros for
it. So that's just under 30,000 pounds. It's a beautiful car. So that is my, that's the daily
48. Now, I'm afraid I couldn't find this in the auction, but I did find it in the classified
for the two seater. Again, super low mileage for what it is. Six speed manual gearbox,
1994 Porsche 968 convertible. That is nice. Can you imagine chasing her around those twisty roads
in New Zealand? I just, that was it. And together, they would come to about 65,000 pounds. So you'd
have a little airfare too. I think it's rather wonderful. I like, I like those. Anyone's driven
the roads in New Zealand, they really are. They're something else. So let's go to Neil Clifford, who
really is on the naughty step at the moment. I am really on the naughty step.
So we need a classic four door beauty that you're going to look back at. And you
need the same for a two door. Is that right? Yeah. Yeah. So I'm going a 1991 Mercedes Benz
500 E in Bonnites. Yeah. For that money. Yeah. I'm using US dollars because I didn't know what
New Zealand dollar was. But this, this is similar. Look at that. No one's offended in New Zealand or
America. No, no. Actually, no, we're always, we're almost in budget. Don't worry. It's half the money.
But yeah, half. But most four door cars, saloons, you don't look back. It's really rare.
No, you, you, it's a strong argument. It's just, but I'm not eligible for a job.
And I, you know, I've earned a bonnet. I've earned that color, actually. You look back at it because
those arches are a work of art because it's just, it's a boring car wrapped in the most
gorgeous wolf's suit you've ever seen. So you're definitely barring that and you're going to
negotiate hard and you'll get it cheap. And then two doors. I'm doing a Manish really.
A 308 GT4 in blue with tan. Look at that. That is one of the prettiest two door cars ever.
And it's only 69,000 euros. And the other one is I think 68,000 euros. So you're well under the
budget of 150 US dollars by $1,000. Honestly, sometimes think I'm in chart. It's like
this is a remedial school and I'm the teacher. Yeah. I mean, I've got Cooper supporting.
I've got Cooper saying to, I've got Cooper saying to Clifford, don't worry about it on the budget.
It's all good. Yeah. I mean, I've blown the budget. Cooper does it every week.
Here we go. Mr. Cooper, blow the budget.
You're going to laugh at this, but I think no one will have thought about this and you'll
all be kicking yourselves. So for the four seater, that's a fantastic daily. And because some,
a lot of new news, I think a long time since I've been there, but South Island, some North Island
roads are quite gravelly some of them. They're not sealed roads, some of them. They're amazing.
They're mega. I think you would always look back at a VW Jetta 16 valve.
That was the thinking person's Golf GTI, mainly because of those wheels.
Those wheels. Zoom in on the wheel, please. Oh, yes. Oh, yes. They look like a Steely.
They look like a Steely. They're an alloy. And that clear glass that I always thought
that Jetta shape, if you knew your new 16 valve, so I reckon that would go,
that's probably 20, 25 grand maybe. And then the other one, thinking of those lovely South Island,
and that car's in the auction and it starts the day before this goes out. So if you're interested,
get yourself logged on to Khan Classic on Friday this week when it comes out.
The other one, I'm amazed no one's decided to choose this because this is such a winner.
It is. A Lotus Elise S2. That was nice in the auction. I think nice, lightweight,
bit of suspension travel. It's the Lotus Elise that they didn't make 10 years before.
I think both of those you could easily get. And that starts in the auction
on Wednesday. So it will still be nicely live on Friday on Khan Classic when we come out.
I think there's a winners. So, well done for staying in budget. I agree with the Saloon car.
Support to those interests. In my experience of New Zealand races, they're quite big and open.
They're like a bit of power. And I think at least might be a bit gutless there.
Because they're, so my four door, my four door is obviously a beautiful pretzer.
Because I think you've got, if you're in the North Island, you've got a bit loose surface,
you can be a bit cheeky, slide it round on the loose. And I would always turn around and look
at a series. That's a facelift actually, but a facelift gen one in pretzer is just,
it's a, for me, it's an icon now. And now I'm new to these, but these little Z3Ms in silver are,
I've led to believe really good cars. Because whilst you're sitting there talking about steering
feel, I'm actually eight miles further up the road because I've got 320 whatever horsepower,
321 horsepower, I'm going much faster. I love these. I've just, Dara, we'll do a video soon
on mine. Dara just put Bilstein's wide in the rear track and we've put a new diff in it. We've
shortened it all. So now it's a right little monster and it sits at a steady 4,785 miles an hour,
but we've turned into a Yobo. So I think that is one of the great undiscovered cars. And the
I've had one for eight months now and I really do believe that. So I'm so far under budget
that with the rest of the money, I'm going to send Neil Clifford on a Know Your International
Currency course, which will be, I'll make sure he attends three one hour sessions so he knows
what currencies are worth. I'd love to, wouldn't it be great just to go to New Zealand with a car
for a month and turn your phone off and drive around? It'd be just... If I don't do the Silver
Phone Rally this year, I will be mortified. I'm going to do it. Whatever happens, I'll do it. I just,
that place, Queenstown as well. You go to Queenstown, you're like, I'm staying here. Yeah.
Why would I want to go anywhere else? I did a bungee jump there once. That was a bit hairy.
Yeah. Let's do some music now, because this has gone on far too long. Here we go. Let's go to
Manage first. He's going to enlighten us as usual. You're muted, Manage.
I'm muted myself, apologies. There was a police car going by. I've just spent the weekend in
Madrid researching possibly the next movie. I was in a very, I'll tell you the restaurants
in Madrid, goodness me, they take fine dining to a very, very high level. There's nothing less than
10 courses. Each course is probably two centimetres square, but my God, the powder, the effusions,
whatever. But the music that sits in the background is often very, very good. I was shazaming
constantly, and I heard this great piece of car music. It's called Don't Turn It Off,
featuring Q-Zen by a band called Forty Thieves. And I've got to tell you, it's a great piece of music
to drive through. Have some of that. Have some of that. Let's go to Knockeford.
My lovely friend, Paul, went to buy a XJ40 of some sort, went to buy a lovely old Jag,
because he's a Jagman, and came back with a one owner, BMW 730.
In red, super rare in red with the very white linen interior. Wow.
20,000 miles, one owner, got all the original number plate dealer on the number plate,
just like a perfect thing. So off he went to buy the, the one thing you have to go and buy is the
updated Blaupunked Bremen, so you can do your streaming. And then all day Saturday, we spent
with other mates on our little WhatsApp group talking about what albums, ideally tapes,
but then maybe it was early CD, 86, 87, what albums would be in that car? You know,
if you, if you went, it was simply red stars, and it was Madonna. But the one for me is this
album cover. Yeah. 1986, that Phil Collins album, you know, totally weird album now. If you think
about an album with basically a drummer, but his voice was brilliant. And the song was brilliant.
My choices take me home. Oh, I love that. You know, and I played it a couple of times,
and it's fantastic. So that's how many musos hate Genesis and hate Phil Collins. I don't understand
it. I think he's fantastic. I don't think he doesn't hate anything. That's a great
start. Let's go to Neil Clifford. I just did it. All right, let's go to Chris Cooper.
When I was a student in South Sea, somebody probably correctly pointed out in the comments
last week, I used to do yacht racing across the channel when I was there. And one night,
coming back from Sherbourg somewhere, quite windy, blowy, the thing is flying along under
three sails. And somebody had a cassette or something playing that song, that Phil Collins song.
It's a one getting across the channel and you saw the lighthouse and some cats. I can't tell you
how evocative is one of the strongest memories of the 80s is that song flying across the channel
and spoke. I've gone this week. I think for the greatest ever pop band ever. Oh, bold move, bold
statement. Abba. Possibly. The winner takes it all. I listen to it randomly on Sunday.
Yeah, that was great. Doopie, doopie, do. Prodigy. I think you've got to be in a certain frame of
mind for what is in the top five greatest bands ever. They're just the bollocks, aren't they?
And I was in the car the other day and thought, I want to make a bit of time and I put on funky
shit. And do you grow a pair of horns in a way that, I mean, it should carry a health warning
that Prodigy. If you put it on in a car in the right mood, you're gone. It's just awesome. So
thank you for everything they've done to spirited driving, let's say. Well, that was the end of
episode 75. No more housekeeping. We'll be around for episode 76. Stay well and please send us some
more factoids. I didn't get my factoid in at the beginning this time. It was ill-disciplined
of me. I'll do it next time. But there's a few rolling in. I had some of them, that absolute
corpus. Bye-bye.
Like an untamed animal for an area rug under a rustic farmhouse table from Wayfair.com.
This has been your Wayfair Style Tip to keep those interiors superior.
ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend.
8.5. The war for the spark rages on. Yet one last hope remains.
Four ancient warriors are about to take to the stars and take the galaxy by storm.
Hey, so here's what you're going to do. You're going to go to
HTTPS. They added that. Colon. Yeah. God, check on that.
God, no, don't we all. I wish I were dead. Colon slash.
Stungeons and Daddies presents Grand Paws and Galaxies, an improvised actual place
senior star citizen space opera adventure coming February 10th to our solar system.
About this episode
A lively discussion unfolds around the evolution of the Lamborghini Countach, exploring how the addition of features over the years has led to a decline in its original appeal. The hosts debate the merits of various models, emphasizing how 'more' often detracts from the driving experience. Anecdotes about personal car preferences and comparisons to food, particularly burgers, illustrate the theme that balance is key in both automotive design and culinary delights. The conversation also touches on other cars that exemplify this principle, making for an engaging and humorous episode.
automatic gearbox
horsepower
Jeep
Peugeot
steering feel
Stellantis
torque
twin turbo
V12 engine
V8 engine
Audi 90
Audi A8
Audi Quattro
BMW 6 Series
BMW 7 Series
BMW Z3
Ferrari 512 TR
Ferrari 599
Ferrari F12 Berlinetta
Lamborghini Countach
Land Rover Defender
Land Rover Range Rover
Lotus Elise
Mercedes-Benz G-Class
Mercedes-Benz SL
Porsche 911
Porsche 928
Porsche 968
Porsche Boxster
Porsche Cayenne
Porsche Cayman
Porsche Panamera
Porsche Taycan
Rolls-Royce Silver Shadow
Triumph TR7
Volkswagen Golf
Volkswagen Jetta
Original notes
Download Car & Classic’s app today to see our 2CG’s, and our weekly pick of our favourite listings: https://candc.li/App_Download_
(00:00) Intro
(00:06) More is less
(15:30) The news
(19:36) You bought a private plate, but you didn't ! Private plate purchasing shenanigans
(28:24) Has Porsche gone a little bit boring ?
(46:37) The pleasure of using a car as it was designed
(59:10) 2CG by Car & Classic
(1:10:02) Music
Welcome to Chris Harris on Cars. The platform where Chris Harris (of Top Gear & automotive journalist) explores the obsessive world of cars. From in-depth reviews and hilarious podcasts, to pushing a car to its limits and debates on the future of the automobile - Chris and his friends bring their unfiltered passion, expertise, and humour. Whether you're a die-hard petrolhead or just curious about our world, this is your go-to destination for everything on four wheels.
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The Car Podcast with Chris Harris & Friends
Chris Harris
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