00:00
Welcome to the Reckon Yard, I'm Jerry Wayne Longmire and y'all presumably still y'all
00:29
are welcome here in the Church of Internal Combustion. We just asked that you show up with an open
00:37
heart. Sighting, here we are in season three. All right, who saw that coming? I wasn't sure
00:45
how many of these I was gonna do. And then, you know, year and a half later, we're trucking
00:51
on into season three. It's been a bit of busy week. I'm recording this on Wednesday
01:02
because I gotta go out of town at the end of the week. I'm going to Chicago Saturday and Friday.
01:07
I got my kids got a music performance. So I got stuff going on all day Friday and
01:12
tomorrow I'll mostly run around promoting the Chicago show, which I'm happy to say. I think
01:18
it's going to be great. We've got a good number of tickets sold already and the number keeps climbing.
01:25
So I'm real excited about that. But I also got to spend some time tomorrow. I condensed the first.
01:33
I'm doing a weird thing for the Chicago show because I didn't get to tour up there
01:38
when I was getting ready to film the Reckon Yard, my first special. So I thought, man,
01:43
here's what I'll do is I'm going to do instead of hiring an opener, I'm going to be my own opener.
01:49
I'm going to go out and I'm going to do a 30 minute condensed version of the Reckon Yard,
01:56
just the high points. And then I'm going to close it up by doing
02:05
my new hour. It's called the tipping point. And we're going to be filming that
02:11
in the spring. So I'm really excited about it.
02:16
You notice there's some changes here in the Reckon Yard. Those of you that are watching and not
02:21
just listening. But we did a little redecorate. Got my Castro sign in there and perform us a
02:29
little sticker wall. So the stickers you got to send me over here on my door.
02:34
Of course, St. Dell's back up there to watch over us, make sure we act right.
02:42
They'll, they'll senior and Leighi Koker to the patron saints of the Reckon Yard, Harley Earl,
02:49
also also also in the saint hood here for us. Man, I'm excited. I took a week off and
02:59
took care of some things. Fixed my lawnmower, tore the engine down, ready to put a cam in it.
03:04
I thought it needed a cam, tore engine down. Wasn't cam is just real bad vapor lock,
03:08
but it turns out carb was just dumping fuel and plug was so carbon fouled. It wasn't even funny,
03:16
was I got the carb straightened out, got tightened a little, little tight, tight on the
03:20
valve last, you know, just didn't even much. It was pretty close to 3000s already. I just
03:25
little, little quarter turn on each set of valves or you're in taking exhaust valve.
03:33
Well, John Deere running like a champ again. No breaking strut. It's gonna be all right, I guess.
03:41
At least till we completely crater the bottom end on that engine, which I hear they're notorious
03:45
for. Boy, I thought it's not a very good coaster. It's just soaking up moisture. I got
03:49
my little whiskey here. Having me a little whiskey this evening.
03:56
This is a, man, we were dealing with some people. Somebody tried to, hey, I could be wrong,
04:04
but I felt like they pulled an old trick. This is like a old, old, old entertainment
04:11
deal. People go out and contact the entertainer and talk to you about booking you and start
04:17
working on a prize, talking about that kind of stuff. And then they'll go quiet and they'll
04:21
ghost you. They'll go quiet on you. But they'll watch your calendar and make sure you don't
04:25
book nothing else. And then a couple of weeks or a week before that thing they want you to do,
04:33
they'll come back with some low ball offer. And I just had somebody do that to me and
04:38
I saw it coming a mile away and I just, I told management. I was like, I,
04:44
you know, tell them to get wrecked, which she will not. She will find a very polite way to say
04:51
we're not interested. But boy, I saw it. It's funny because I predicted it. When we first started
04:58
talking about this event and doing this stuff, I told, told me, I go, I go, no, man, I've seen,
05:06
I know this. I've seen this. They're like, oh, we hadn't heard back from them. You're not
05:11
going to, you know, I've been through this before. It's usually old rednecks and the
05:18
shit that tried to pull that crap on me. So anyways, that was a little,
05:26
was all good though. Luckily I had an existing offer already for something else at that time
05:32
period and it ain't gonna be no skin off my back. It would have been a nice lick to hit
05:38
if we'd hit it, but I just had a feeling. I had a feeling going there. Sometimes I just
05:43
got to go with my gut and it's a big gut and it's got a lot of opinions, but boy,
05:49
it just hardly ever steers in your own. Let's do a quick little sponsor copy
05:58
and we're going to do something a little different at the beginning of this podcast.
06:03
Not again. We'll talk about the truck. The truck I selected today is a
06:09
2003 quarter ton GMT 800, GMC. There's one of my father-in-law on the entire time I met him
06:21
and I only knew him about a decade, but in that decade, he shaped a good deal of who I am,
06:30
but I only knew him really about 10 years and this was a difficult one to go through,
06:40
because it wasn't all good. Sometimes father-in-laws and son-laws, boy, it is.
06:49
Sometimes they go together like peanut butter and asphalt. They just don't mix
06:53
and we were two very different people, but I'm excited to talk about him
07:02
for all our differences. He was very, very special to me and
07:10
looking forward to getting into that. Anyway, let's do some sponsor copy here.
07:13
This season of the Rick and Yard is proudly brought to you by absolutely nobody. That's
07:19
right, church. We're sponsor free, which means right now this whole production is powered entirely
07:25
by black coffee, stubbornness, and a portable AC unit. But listen, if you got a brand or business or
07:36
just a rich uncle with a guilty conscience, we got room at the table for you. Slide on in,
07:42
sponsor the yard, and let's tell the world you got better taste than your competitors.
07:47
Except that for keeping it short and sweet in season three, baby.
07:59
Well, no, I was only going for a week, but it feels like it's been a month since I talked to y'all,
08:03
so I'm excited to be doing this again already. Today we're going to talk
08:11
and we're going to do something else a little different, because I'm not going to spend as much
08:15
time on the technical stuff. You all got Google, you want to learn about something. And to be honest,
08:23
there are far better, far more knowledgeable men than me and people than me doing car
08:31
spec stuff on the internet. And you should probably go listen to one of them for that kind
08:36
of stuff. I'm very opinionated about vehicles and I let my emotions get in the way.
08:42
Birth of a platform. By the late nineties, GM was sweating.
08:50
Dodger just dropped that ram with the Peterbilt Cosplay front end.
08:57
Ford was selling F-series trucks like funnel cakes at the county fair.
09:02
And meanwhile, GM was still riding the old GMT 400. Good truck,
09:08
but it was looking like your uncle's wardrobe. Reliable, yes. Stylish enough.
09:15
So in 99, they pulled the tarp off the GMT 800. Brand new bones, brand new guts, brand new face.
09:22
This wasn't a facelift. It was GM throwing a whole new paradise and praying they didn't roll snake eyes.
09:30
Frame was fully boxed, stiffer, stronger, less flex than the old one. The kind of backbone
09:36
you want when you're dragging a cattle trailer or hitting potholes big enough to qualify a swimming hole.
09:45
Up front, they went with the independent torsion bars. I mean, you could drive it to work without
09:51
rattling the fillings out of your molds. Now back, they kept solid axle leaf springs because
09:57
let's be honest, leaf springs are like duct tape ugly, but they'll hold the whole damn world
10:01
together. And under the hood, that's where the legend got born. The LS based vortex come out of
10:08
nowhere. 4.8, the 5.3, the 6.0. And all that big gas, 8.1. If you're the kind of dude that was like
10:18
gas mileage, never heard of it. Those motors earned reputations. The 5.3, especially y'all
10:23
have heard me gush poetic about a 5.3. It'll run forever if you give it oil changes and
10:29
the occasional pep talk and everyone's while water pump.
10:34
Jim rounded the corners off, especially compared to the old square rigs. Some folks loved it. Some
10:40
said it looked too soft, but it was a truck. It was a truck you could drive to work
10:47
and park at church without anybody asking if you were moonlighting as a ranching.
10:54
The interiors got civilized. Cup holders that held actual cups, not just a loose Dr.
10:59
Peppercane. Dashboards you could read without a miner's helmet.
11:06
And if you sprung for leather, it wasn't vinyl and drag anymore. It was damn near Cadillac leather.
11:15
And then there was the avalanche. God help us.
11:19
Jim said, what if we made a truck with commitment issues? It had that midgate you could fold down
11:24
to turn it into a pickup. Great in theory, but it looked a little like a Tonka toy,
11:29
got left too close to a campfire. Still, it carved out its own little cult following. Probably
11:36
same people who like sports. I say that. I kind of like them too.
11:42
But the platform carried everything. Silverado, Sierra, Tahoe, suburban,
11:46
Yukon Cadillac Escalade. The Escalade especially, it went from grandpa's car to every rapper's
11:52
driveway. And we've talked about that. If you saw spinners and a TV in the headrest in 2002,
11:57
odds are you were looking at a GMT 800 Cadillac Escalade. And then in 2001, the heavy duty
12:04
trucks arrived with Duramax diesel paired to the Allison transmission. That was like peanut
12:09
butter meat and jelly. A peanut butter Catoa house. The jelly was rated for 500,000 miles.
12:16
LB7 can still kiss every bit of my ass.
12:26
The GMT 800 ran until 2006 and a half tons, a little longer in SUVs. And the truth is,
12:33
this thing is still on a GM's crown jewels. It's a balance right perfectly between work truck,
12:40
grit and daily driver comfort. You still see them everywhere. Sun-fated paint, headliner sagging,
12:47
but the old 5.3 humming along like it's got something to prove. They outlast the warranty,
12:52
the banknote, and sometimes the man that bought it. That's how you know GM nailed it.
12:58
And that's all we're going to talk about as far as the technical side of this truck. That's
13:02
enough. I'm a huge proponent of it. My father-in-law has had the six-liter,
13:06
which I'm not a big fan of. Boy, he sure had some issues with it and the transmission a couple
13:11
times, but he was so... When I got my Z71, he was so tickled to death that he was like,
13:19
Felly, you don't realize... He called me Felly, always. Felly, you don't realize
13:23
General Motors spent 10 years designing this truck. They spent a decade
13:27
putting this truck together. They went around and talked to mechanics and they talked to body
13:31
men. They talked to people that were in the truck market to see what people were asking for.
13:37
They looked at what Ford and Dodge were selling.
13:42
It was a well-designed, my little GMT-801, if not... It absolutely is the best little
13:49
pickup I ever owned in my life. I still kick myself for selling it. It was a fine little machine.
13:57
My second, my three-quarter-ton Duramax diesel, I hope that that truck is at the bottom of a lake
14:03
filled with every rock, sisyphus rolled up that freaking hill. Piss on that truck and that LB7.
14:13
With that little 5.3 Z71 half-ton, I worked hell out of that truck.
14:19
My father-in-law, Ken, he had this truck when I met him. His was clean. It was perfect.
14:24
He was a music guy. He had gone throughout this truck and put deadening,
14:36
what are the insulation stuff is, and the doors under the floor mat, under the carpet,
14:45
above the headliner. He had a nice speaker set up. He had gone some aftermarket speakers.
14:52
That truck dumped. He liked his music clear and he liked it loud.
14:58
He was an interesting guy. Before I spend a whole lot of time talking about him,
15:03
we're going to do something a little different today. My wife recorded something for y'all
15:15
because I really wanted her to talk about him a little bit and she said, well,
15:19
she goes, I'll write something and I'll record it and we're going to listen to that right now.
15:23
So this is my lovely wife, Rachel Carr, telling you a little something about her dad.
15:35
Because I felt like her words needed to be included. Hey y'all, I don't usually step into the spotlight
15:41
on Jerry's platforms and truthfully, I prefer it that way. He tells the stories I helped
15:46
behind the scenes, but today's podcast episode is different. It's about someone who shaped both of us
15:53
in ways that are hard to explain but impossible to ignore. It's about my dad. He wasn't just my
16:00
father. He was my foundation. He's the voice in my head that still tells me I can do anything
16:06
even when I'm at my lowest. I was his firstborn, his daughter, and he never once let me forget
16:12
how much he adored me. I don't use the word princess and neither did he because it was not about being
16:18
spoiled. I was sacred to him. He poured love into me like it was his life's mission.
16:26
And I believed him. When he told me I was smart, when he said I could do anything,
16:31
when he signed off every message with dad loves the baby, she's the best one. I believed
16:36
him because he meant it. And I knew he meant it because he always showed up for me. It didn't
16:42
matter where I was living at the time, he would just be there. He showed up in Lubbock when I got
16:48
mono in college and could barely move. He showed up in Houston when I had to be hospitalized for
16:52
a kidney infection. He slept on a chair beside me for three nights. He never missed even one
16:58
award ceremony, recital, sports match, or special event. More than that, he never
17:05
missed an opportunity to tell me how proud he was of me. We had a connection that ran deep,
17:11
music, art, creativity. He made mixtapes, burn CDs, and playlists that felt like little emotional
17:19
blueprints. Songs were how he said what words couldn't always convey for him. And he knew more
17:25
about music than anyone I've ever met. I want you to know I could spend hours telling you
17:30
about how cool he was because he was so cool. He was a real-life rodeo cowboy. Went to high school
17:37
with Billy Gibbons. Partied in river oaks with the bushes. Yes, those bushes. Was on the flight
17:44
crew for the Goodyear Blimp in Houston. Did beautiful leatherwork. Was a legitimate dog
17:50
whisper. And he even smoked a little grass with Jerry and I on the back porch from time to time.
17:56
But those are not the things he wanted to be remembered for.
17:59
He wanted to be remembered as a man who loved his family more than anything. And he did.
18:05
He was silly and fun. He sang with his whole heart.
18:09
Danced and played and laughed. Oh, how we laughed.
18:13
It's really because of him that I love comedy. We watch more comedy specials before I hit the
18:19
age of 17 than most adults do in their entire life. We love to joke and rib each other.
18:25
And unlike my mother, he beamed with pride and admiration as my sarcasm skills blossomed into
18:31
something downright operatic in my teen years. So when I took the job as operations manager at
18:38
Houston's Laugh Stop, it felt like a dream. And he was the first person I called.
18:43
He came to many shows during my tenure there. And of course that's where he first met Jerry.
18:48
Before Jerry and I were really even friends yet. And this is where Jerry's part of the
18:54
story begins. It's funny how things work out, right? Every child deserves a parent like the one I had.
19:01
And every day I try to parent our kids the way he parented me. With presence, with joy,
19:07
with marvel at their individuality, and with total belief in who they are.
19:12
And of course, with the unwavering, unconditional love and support they deserve.
19:18
The truth is, I'll miss him for the rest of my life.
19:22
But I'll always carry the love he gave me. It's still here. It's still guiding me.
19:28
Thanks for letting us tell you about him.
19:40
That was a lovely rate.
19:41
Can't tell. She liked dad a little bit.
19:51
He really was. He was on the flight crew for the America's Good Year Blink.
19:57
He had a set of these glasses. Mine's a little worn out and sweaty, but
20:05
this is a glass that I always drink my whiskey out of.
20:08
One of his good year. He was on the good year of America's and
20:17
absolutely loved that job. He had so many stories about it.
20:22
Everybody wanted to ride in a blimp, so when they went to places,
20:25
you know, always local celebrities was trying to figure out how to score themselves a ride on the blimp.
20:32
These are those in Memphis and old Jerry Lee Lewis saw them in their flight suits,
20:39
had to come to, how do I get on that blimp? They told him who he needed to talk to.
20:45
Of course, Jerry Lee marched over there and had himself a conversation.
20:51
Before they knew it, they was on the blimp, soaring above Memphis, Jerry Lee looking down
20:57
on his little defunct kingdom. Ellie could probably see all the way to disgrace land from there.
21:07
He had a pistol in his pocket the whole time. Nobody knew until they got up there,
21:12
old man had a pistol in his pocket, whooped it out and show everybody.
21:17
I said he was kind of a hoot. I first met again.
21:27
When Rachel was hired only at the club, I was on, I mean, I was just on all the shows back then.
21:35
I was basically, I was the club emcee. I was featuring for people. I was there every week and
21:42
Pop, as I come to college,
21:47
Pop dug my sense of humor. He always liked it when I was on the show.
21:52
Got a little moth here, so he always liked it when I was on the show.
21:56
He would hang out. I hung out many times after shows, talking to him and
22:04
occasionally Rachel's brother would be there.
22:06
I always enjoyed his presence. He always had good questions. He was always
22:14
interested and he was funny. He was funny. Sorry, my heart is killing me.
22:22
He was funny. He had plenty of jokes. He'd get a laugh.
22:28
He's had a great sense of humor. He was always looking cut up about something.
22:39
In the early days when I met him, I just knew him as Rachel's dad.
22:47
Rachel had a boyfriend at the time and so I wasn't trying to, you know, stop my type of shit.
22:54
To me and her, we're just kind of becoming friends. We just knew each other through work.
23:04
He was always good to me. He was always good. I always made sure to come up after a show,
23:07
talk to me. Every time he was there, we'd sit there and have a beer together.
23:14
Tell stories about old Houston. Both of us had a little bit of
23:17
a little bit of old Houston knowledge, much older than me.
23:29
There wasn't long after that.
23:33
What was? I knew him probably a year or so before me and Rachel dated. Me and Rachel
23:37
had known each other a couple of years, the time we started dating.
23:40
The time I made my move finally got off my ass and went after her the right way.
23:53
But very early on in being her dating, he still didn't know. He didn't know we was dating.
24:02
And I had basically been living at her apartment. I've been staying at her
24:06
apartment for a month. I hadn't left. We were having fun.
24:12
He came into town. We was all going to go to the rodeo.
24:17
The cook-off, big cook-off, Houston livestock show in rodeo. It's a huge event.
24:24
All these big cook-off teams come out, throw a big ol' soiree. You know what I mean?
24:32
It's a big deal. He had tickets to cook out. He was going to take Rachel and all her friends.
24:41
He showed up at her apartment that night. I'll never forget.
24:49
We were getting ready to leave and we were all just goofing off and that kind of stuff.
24:54
And I went to walk out of the door with Rachel's friend, Andrea.
24:58
And Rachel goes... I think she called me babe. She said,
25:06
babe, did you take your key? And he looked at me. I'll never forget the look I got from that man.
25:16
Whoa, fella. What the hell's going on here? You know what I mean? He's an old cowboy, for real.
25:21
Oh, fella. What's going on here?
25:28
And her stupid-ass friend, Andrea, just burnt out. He doesn't know y'all are dating?
25:33
Like, well, shit he does now.
25:40
And then I got drunk at the damn cook-off and told him all about my love for his daughter.
25:47
And then y'all have heard that story. We went to Sherlock's and Rachel and Andrea got a little drunk
25:55
and tried to recreate the scene from the Alamo where they lost.
26:01
And he kept it together all night. He was cool. Cool heads prevailed.
26:07
But he started watching me a little closer after that, like then he knew, you know.
26:12
He said, he smoked a little weed back then. That was his thing. He like smoked a little weed.
26:20
He's one of them. He grew up, so he grew up over here and not in this house.
26:26
This was his grandmother's house, but he grew up kind of like West University,
26:33
you know, pretty close to downtown Houston. He used to hang out at Oak Forest.
26:38
And he ran around. He went to Lamar, which is one of the big high schools downtown.
26:45
He did go to, he went to school with Billy Gibbons,
26:50
told me all kinds of stories about hanging out with Billy Gibbons, you know.
26:54
Billy Gibbons had like a, I think it was a 56 Ford truck back then that he was always
26:59
working on and building. He's always been a hot rod guy and they would hang out at one
27:04
of their friend's house in River Oaks and work on Billy's truck and Billy would get his guitars out.
27:10
In fact, he told me, so Billy's first band was called Move and Sidewalks,
27:14
before he formed ZZ Top. And Move and Sidewalk played
27:20
Pops High School Prom. They were the band at the High School Proms,
27:24
Billy Gibbons and Move and Sidewalks, which that's cool as shit, you know.
27:30
He loved Billy Gibbons.
27:35
But he did. He grew up right here in Houston. He got into rodeo. He was a steer wrestler.
27:42
He was a hell of a good steer wrestler. Took a bad tumble, broke his back in a bunch of places.
27:47
Damned him there, ruined him. He had to go through all kinds of crap to get his back
27:51
back. And it plagued him the rest of his life. He was on Celebrex for
27:56
God knows how many years, you know. And that's one of those ones now they tell
27:59
you to stay away from because it causes heart problems and all kinds of other stuff.
28:03
But his only thing gave him any belief.
28:10
But he accepted me early on, being Rachel Dayton. He would, you know,
28:17
he pulled me in tight, tell me something every once in a while.
28:22
He accepted me and I can't for the life of me figure out why. I didn't have a lot.
28:26
All I had going for me was comedy at the time. And it was all up in there.
28:34
But he just, he just accepted me. He accepted me when him, when his daughter and I decided
28:43
to go rent a house together, move in together, an old forced, his old stomping ground.
28:52
He come over right when we moved in that house. He come over and helped us fix that house.
28:55
It was a house of such peace. It was all we could afford. And he come over and worked on that house
29:05
for a week. Being Rachel went to Aruba, we went on vacation. And he spent the whole week at that
29:12
house working on stuff around that house trying to help us out. He's a good dude. So when I
29:18
met him, he was in college. It's kind of weird. You don't meet to me, you know,
29:24
50-something-year-old dudes in college, but he was going to college at Lone Star.
29:28
Lived up there and not Lone Star. Sam Houston State lived up there in Huntsville.
29:34
Had a little trailer house off campus. He was renting a nice little place.
29:40
And what had happened is his father Raymond died of dementia. I talked to y'all a little
29:47
bit about that, but his father died of dementia. They found out the nursing home was mistreatment.
29:54
Ken and his brother and his mother sued that nursing home and won.
30:00
And they got him about, I think Ken got him about $250,000 out of that.
30:09
He was going to college coincidentally at the same time Rachel's younger brother was also
30:13
going to college at Sam Houston. And that's when that kid started really getting in
30:18
trouble and things started going downhill for him. And we'll get to that in a little bit.
30:29
When Ken's spending there every dime he had trying to keep that kid
30:32
in school and all his bills paid, then try to get him through college and keep him all right.
30:40
He did. He could have been, I mean, $250,000 ain't a shit ton of money, but you could set yourself
30:52
up pretty well for it. But he worked so hard trying to protect that kid and keep that kid
30:59
on the right path. And that kid went down a dark path. We still don't have a lot to do
31:06
within your day because the way he behaves and the way he treats his sister.
31:14
I finally decided I wasn't going to be able to talk to that kid anymore because I was going to end
31:17
up hurting because I don't give a shit if she's your sister. She's my wife, bro. And you're not
31:24
going to raise hands at her and holler at her and all that kind of stuff. I can't figure it
31:29
out to be honest with you. Ken was so respectful. So he was a cowboy. He was a real live hippie cowboy,
31:38
but he was not a disrespectful man. He was not a loud man. He was very quiet spoken.
31:46
I don't know how his other kid became the way he did. I really don't. It just blows my mind.
31:52
What do you know? There's a dirty doctor giving away meth to people, basically.
31:59
We had a good time in that Althea house. He spent a lot of time there with us.
32:08
He was living in Huntsville at the time, but Bill didn't finish college. He finished college
32:13
and he was going to go start looking for a job.
32:15
He would come down and hang out. He would never let me pay for anything.
32:26
He would come down. He would drive down Huntsville and pick us up in his truck
32:31
and like, man, we're going to go to his favorite thing,
32:34
shipply donuts on Ella. So way back in the 60s and 70s, the Ella location of shipply donuts,
32:42
they would stay open 24 hours. So when you were a stoner back then, that was the only game in town
32:48
was go over there and get lying at the donut show. That was one of his favorite things to do.
32:52
About nine to 10 o'clock at night, we'd
32:57
smoke us a little. We'd get in his pickup. We'd head over to the shipply donuts.
33:03
Sometimes we'd just go to a restaurant and get dessert. That was another one of his favorite
33:07
things to do and he never would let me pay for damn things. He wouldn't let me pay for
33:12
nothing. Never, ever, never got to pay. I tried it so many times. He would get so pissed at me.
33:19
Never ever let me pay for anything.
33:24
That was a good time for us in that little out of your house and we saw him out. He would come
33:28
over and he'd hang out. That's where I was doing my growing up, learning how to be
33:47
a man. I knew some things but I hadn't put them into practice. I was living with a woman.
33:56
I hadn't learned what that's like for a real long-term commitment.
34:04
He was dropping little bits of truth on me here and there.
34:09
Some of you guys have heard my story about him in the Adderall Hill that time.
34:18
That was in the early days working on the house. What had happened was
34:21
Dylan was having trouble at school and Dylan goes over and sees this psychiatrist in
34:27
freaking Midland, this junk doctor named Dr. Ben Hinkins. He's had a stroke since then,
34:33
thankfully, because I used to spend a lot of time thinking about catching this doctor in the
34:38
dark alleyway and just putting an ass whooping on him for the damage he did to Rachel's family.
34:45
He started describing her little brother a bunch of Adderall.
34:48
Ken was having fatigue. He was going through some stuff. His back was all jacked up and
34:55
he was depressed. He thought, well, I'll go over and see this psychiatrist, too.
34:59
The psychiatrist put him on that damn Adderall mess, too. That shit's basically just speed.
35:05
I don't care. You frame it any way you want it. I don't think there's a lot of good in
35:13
it. I've known doctors that got through med school using the mess, and even they'll tell you, man,
35:18
I wish I had messed with it because it's a... That thing is a get you.
35:29
And it did. It got Dylan. It got Rachel's little brother triggered schizophrenia,
35:37
and he went off the deep end hearing voices and stuff.
35:44
Ken did everything he could in his power to try to stop it from happening and help that kid.
35:51
They ever spent money on doctors, spent money on psychologists. Just everything.
35:58
Preachers. Anybody could help that kid.
36:01
And he kept it all to himself while he was doing it. He didn't complain about it. He didn't complain about him.
36:17
When he got out of college, he didn't have a lot of money.
36:22
And he also knew that I had gone to him one night
36:27
and asked him for his blessing to ask Rachel to marry me. We've been together
36:33
about six, seven months at that part.
36:38
I knew I was in love with that girl. I knew I wanted to be married to her.
36:45
And I caught him out on the porch one night. He was over there hanging out and came over the house.
36:49
Showed me how to cook chicken on the grill because I kept drying out the chicken.
36:53
He was tired of eating dried chicken. So he showed me how to grill some chicken without drying it out,
36:59
which means he grilled the chicken and I watched like a dummy.
37:10
nearly 30 years old, making a little money, tearing motorcycles apart and
37:15
parting them out and selling them for parts and fixing up some motorcycles and selling them,
37:21
making a little bit of money, making a little bit of money bartending, making a little bit of money.
37:26
I was bartending in a place called the Kentucky back in.
37:35
And I went to him like a man because I knew how important he was for Rachel.
37:42
And I asked him for his blessing to ask Rachel to marry me.
37:45
And he gave it. And it always surprised me. I just, I was just sure he was going to tell me I don't,
37:54
I don't think it's a good idea, fella. I think you need a little more stability, things like that.
38:01
He didn't. To his credit, he knew how much his daughter loved me and he knew his daughter well
38:10
enough to know that she's probably going to do what she wanted anyways, whether he agreed to or not.
38:23
And I kept that a secret from her. I bought the ring, I had the ring for months
38:30
and I was going to ask her on Christmas Day to marry me.
38:33
That was the whole plan. And I asked her on Christmas Day to marry me because I wasn't very
38:44
original at the time. We were gearing up, Christmas was coming along and
38:51
things weren't going great for him. He went and stayed at his,
38:55
he went and stayed with his mom and his brother here at this house.
38:59
But him and his brother just couldn't get along. Him and Jerry were
39:03
just as different as two souls could be and they couldn't get along and Jerry had been
39:08
the man of the house here for a while and was the older brother and wanted to make sure Ken knew that.
39:16
They were just at each other's throat, couldn't order to get along.
39:20
Rachel was upset. It was Christmas Eve. She was upset and she was like, I don't know why
39:25
my dad, I don't know why he just doesn't come over here and hang out with us. Well, I knew why.
39:29
He didn't come over here and hang out with us because he knew I was going to propose to her in
39:33
the morning and he wanted to let us have that moment.
39:40
She's telling me all this. She'd been on the phone with him. She was upset
39:45
and she was holding, we had went to KFC and got some chicken. She was holding this box of
39:49
KFC chicken and I ran off the bedroom and I snatched that ring and I run right in there
39:54
on December 24th and got down on one knee in the kitchen there while she was holding the box of
40:02
chicken and asked that girl to marry me and she immediately said yes and after we got over the
40:11
little excitement I said, now call your dad because already he's not coming over as he
40:16
thought I was doing this tomorrow. Call your dad telling him to come over and he came over
40:20
and he spent that Christmas with us. We had an extra room at the time when
40:28
we ended up just inviting him to stay there, just move in for a little while until he got
40:32
him a job. He had his fresh college degree. He felt like he had been held back a lot in life
40:41
because he didn't have, he didn't finish college the first time and he thought
40:45
he hoped that having that degree was going to help him out some.
40:51
It didn't because it's all mythology but
41:05
problem is when you're that age employers take a different look at you and it's like
41:10
how much of a liability is this guy? He's going to have health problems. He's already in his
41:15
late fifties. How long is he going to be with us? That kind of stuff. It's ages,
41:22
happens all the time and nobody would give him, nobody, I mean he would go to interview, interview
41:30
and a man was brilliant and nobody would give him a supporting chance. He ended up taking a job
41:36
at Frickin' Target, stocking at Target with a bachelor's degree. The years of experience
41:44
and knowledge under his belt. The man had owned his own car lot. He'd built up a huge
41:52
landscaping and tree service here in the Woodlands. That is if you have the original
41:58
Woodlands Monopoly game, his tree service is in there. He knew everything. He really was a dog
42:08
whisperer. The man had bred dogs and trained dogs. By the time he came to live with us,
42:18
we already had a dog he had trained. He had trained this little dog named Tina, this little
42:24
old Jack Russell. He had bought her as a puppy and trained her and then gave her to Rachel one
42:31
night while she was visiting him in Huntsville. Never forget she brought that dog home at night
42:37
and she was so excited. She called me on the phone on the way. I got a big surprise.
42:43
I was like, hell yeah. I thought Poppy gave her some good weed or there's going to be a sexy
42:49
surprise when she got home and then she walked in carrying this dog and this dog carrier and I was
42:57
so bad. I didn't want no damn dog. I don't want no damn dog. I like dogs. They don't live long enough.
43:05
They just hurt you. She came with that dog. Boy, I didn't want nothing to do with that dog.
43:10
Three days later, that dog's in the shop with me every time she got.
43:13
You know, I've heard me talk a little bit about her.
43:20
Back when that dog died, I was mad all over again. 13 years ago, I told you I want no dog and then
43:25
I'm heartbroken over a little old dog.
43:38
But he's living with us where we start bumping heads a little bit, you know.
43:42
That's where things got a little too cozy, you know.
43:51
You know, he didn't like the way I did much of anything. I kept shop a mess. He didn't care for that.
43:58
He didn't like the fact I didn't keep the yard up probably as good as I should have.
44:05
And he didn't mind telling me.
44:06
I mean, I decided I was going to plant some plants one time. We went and bought some plants.
44:14
We're going to plant some plants down inside that house. And he knew everything about landscaping.
44:19
I didn't know nothing. I was digging these holes and he's, I'll never forget.
44:23
You're about to put an eight dollar plant in a six dollar hole, fella.
44:27
Why are you going to waste your energy? That plant's just going to die.
44:31
You got to dig that hole out. Give them a root for room to expand. Walk me through it.
44:36
Boy, by God, I know how to plant stuff now, you know.
44:45
I went out and sprayed weed killer on the lawn one day and actually sprayed some of his truck.
44:49
Boy, I thought he was going to come under and do something out of me.
44:52
He went out there and washed that damn truck, muttered something about it.
44:57
That spray shit don't work worth a damn, no house, you know.
45:01
You just spray and say, if you don't know what you're doing, you probably just
45:04
killed half the grass. Boy, I was mad at you. You don't know what you're talking about on me.
45:08
It's your enough big old fricking circle that grass by his truck died.
45:14
He's telling me shit all the time. I didn't want him telling me all this shit, man.
45:19
By God, boy, he had an answer for everything.
45:31
I don't think he knew what to make of me all the time.
45:41
Well, we had a lot of good time, man. He took us one night. We all went and saw Robin Trower
45:45
and Jack Bruce live. It was cool as shit, man. One of the best shows I've ever been to in my
45:51
life. He would turn me on to music. Rachel wasn't kidding when she said music was his
45:54
language. That's why he was talking. He would give me mixed CDs, man, that had music.
45:59
Music I still listen to. I can't hear two notes
46:07
of Greg Altman's cover of
46:15
I can't remember the name of the song right now. I can't hear. I can't hear two notes.
46:28
This is a Jackson Brown song that Greg Altman covered.
46:34
Count the time and quarter comes
46:40
I might listen that night.
46:48
I might remember what it was.
46:50
It was all kind of he gave me he had a whole he found out I like Jethro Toll, but I didn't
46:54
know any of Jethro Toll's early music. So he made me a CD of all his favorites of the early
47:00
Jethro Toll. He turned I was a I was a surface level ZZ top fan when I met this man.
47:07
And he turned me on to old Billy bluesy Billy. Blue Jean blues, good stuff and really made
47:16
I'm one of the biggest fans of Reverend Willie G you ever meet in your life. I'm hoping the hell
47:20
I get to meet that for one day just so I can talk to them all about Ken and see if
47:24
you I know he remembers him. They had too much time growing up together.
47:31
He turned me on. I grew up during the grunge phase. The grunge was popular when I
47:36
was in high school, but I just never got into it when I was in the country music.
47:39
He turned me on the Pearl Jam. I was not a Pearl Jam guy until he turned me on the Pearl Jam.
47:47
He bought us tickets so we'd go see ZZ top at the rodeo.
47:52
Like I've seen ZZ top so many times and about half of them was because of him.
47:57
You know, I'd seen him when I was younger. Uncle Bobby was infatuated with him.
48:06
I probably told y'all this story, but when when the Crohn's disease like jacked me up
48:18
real bad before our wedding, we found out I had Crohn's disease and I damn near died.
48:24
It was in so much pain and screwed up and I got out of the hospital and they put me
48:28
on one drug and that drug made my kidney shut down. So we had to switch to another drug and
48:34
that drug was I forgot what it was making something else not work in me.
48:40
And then they put me on the last drug they put me on. I was fatigued so bad I couldn't
48:44
even hardly get just get up go to the bathroom took me like 15 20 minutes.
48:48
I was miserable. I wasn't eating. My hair was falling out. My fingernails were turning to
48:53
paper. That shit was trying to kill me. And doctors, nothing they were coming up with
49:00
was helping. I remember he said one night, I got something make you want to eat fella.
49:08
He rolled us up a big old joint and we spoke that joint right there in the livery big old
49:14
big old hog leg of the day. And Rachel still she's like that. I remember she was so happy
49:20
because I looked up there and said, can I have peanut butter and jelly sandwich?
49:23
And she made me about three of them. I walked them down four days later. I was back at
49:27
work doing construction.
49:43
I think about him and most things I do nowadays. I think I wish he was here to see who I am now
49:49
the calmer guy who's kind of got it figured out. I mean, I figured out that kind of
49:56
I'm starting to figure it out. And if I don't wish he was around to see this part,
50:02
he'd be right here with us.
50:03
This was the first time I went to see him in Huntsville. Rachel was like, hey,
50:26
we're going to visit my dad tonight and we get up there and
50:34
he was smoking his old one hitter and he offered me something. I was like, I don't really like
50:39
I don't really like pipes. I just like to join some kind of old school.
50:43
I was talking out my ass. Hey, I didn't really smoke weed that much.
50:47
He rolls this joint and hands it to me to light it. And it's long. It's big old joint.
50:56
He had these special papers that came out of a roll. He could roll these joints just
51:00
about as long as he wanted to. He rolled this. I mean, it would look like a straw.
51:07
When we started smoking that thing, and I remember I talked about three hits off of it
51:12
and he put on, he wanted us to watch his documentary about the band. I think the
51:17
documentary is called The Band. Leave on Helms and all that. It's The Band.
51:25
And we're watching documentaries along the shit. We're watching the documentary.
51:31
And I took about a third or fourth hit on that joint and he offered it back to me and I
51:35
go, ah, I'm good. He goes, no, fella, you said you want to smoke the joint. We're smoking a joint.
51:40
And we, the three of us, spoke that damn thing and watched that whole documentary about the band.
51:47
And then I had to drive his daughter back home to her apartment in Houston.
51:51
I was driving that monster. I felt like I was driving a damn spaceship at night coming down 45.
51:58
I never been so thankful to see the Houston skyline in my life as that thing
52:01
coming to view, coming out for it. I'm almost there, baby. I made it because if I wreck and
52:07
hurt his baby girl, this son of a bitch will comb the ends of the earth and make sure I have paid my dues.
52:20
He lived with us for a little while there in that little house and
52:25
we had bumping heads a little too much. He decided he was going to go do something else.
52:32
He was also, he wanted to come back to you, so him and Rachel's mom had moved out to Midland for her job.
52:41
He had this thriving business here, all this stuff, but she got offered this really good promotion in the oil industry and that's the,
52:50
she didn't really give him a lot of option. We got to take this job, we're glad to do this.
52:55
He had a rough time when they got out there in Midland because he didn't have his friends and his connections and all that stuff.
53:05
He struggled and then she,
53:13
the way they divorced was ugly. They waited, Rachel was in college
53:23
her and her dad and her younger brother went on a trip to go do something.
53:27
Him and Gail had been fighting and they come back to the house and
53:34
all her stuff was packed up and in the garage, but she'd gotten the flu and couldn't finish moving out.
53:39
She was just going to move out while he was going out of town with his kids.
53:43
I ain't here to bash Rachel's mother.
53:47
We don't see eye to eye on a good many things right now because of stuff involving her younger brother.
53:56
But she was very important to me for a long time and I would get, Ken would tell me stuff about her.
54:01
He was mad at her, you know, viciously betrayed by her and he was still angry about it.
54:05
He would tell me stuff. Me and him would bump heads about it. I'm like, don't tell me a shit about my mom, man.
54:11
I mean, lo and behold, he turned out to be right about a whole bunch of it.
54:14
I wish I'd just shut the hell up and listen to it.
54:19
But we'd bump heads a little bit, but he, he had wanted to come back. He never wanted to go to Midland.
54:25
He had always dreamed about coming back to Houston and so he came back to Houston and realized
54:29
Houston had changed a great deal and it wasn't the same town he grew up in
54:35
and him and his brother didn't get along and they were always sort of fighting and arguing and
54:40
they'd cost him his relationship with his mother. He had a hard time having a relationship with his
54:45
mother because he was so angry about stuff with his brother and he decides to go back to Midland.
54:56
Because the one thing he had found in Midland was it was kind of small town back then.
55:02
He still knew folks around town. It was a little slower pace living.
55:07
And he decided that was for him and he, he went back to Midland
55:17
not too long before we got married.
55:24
Marriage day, our wedding. We got married in Vegas at the Nation Hotel.
55:30
The day of our wedding, I was staying back there in the pastor,
55:33
pastor Jack, come back there and talk to me a little bit about the ceremony.
55:38
I was to make sure I had my vows ready and
55:43
Ken walked up to me and grabbed my hand and shook it. He said,
55:46
Well, Phil, it's all yours. You better take care of it.
55:54
And then he went and walked his daughter down the aisle to meet me, married me.
55:58
And he never gave me a lot of judgment. I mean, he would correct me and stuff like that, but
56:08
I'm sad that we bumped heads as much as we did, especially for Gene.
56:21
We would go out to Midland and visit him. He'd be sad every time we left because there just
56:26
wasn't enough time and he was, he was out there. He was working for a TV station, doing all kind of stuff.
56:39
He came when both our babies were born and time at the house with us
56:45
and time walking in those babies in the world. He loved and grand babies.
56:51
Him and a little Noah, boy, they had a bond. Even though that kid was just a little squirt,
56:55
boy, they had a bond. He was tickled at everything that kid did. Love that little Junie.
57:07
The whole time he was taking the Adderall and the Adderall was messing with it.
57:12
He would get, you would see it any, you know, in the afternoons. He would just be
57:18
he always felt like he wasn't doing enough or he didn't have enough and he was frustrated with life.
57:27
A lot of men can become. It's really easy. I've been there. It's really easy to get into that mode.
57:32
He would tell me these stories that felt, I don't know when I became the old guy on the job site.
57:36
He used to tell me that all the time. I don't know when I've, all these dudes call me the
57:39
cool old dude. I don't know when I became the old guy on the job site. And when it happened to
57:44
me later on, I was like, damn it. When the hell did I become the old guy on the job site?
57:49
I go into comedy club now. I feel ancient. All these kids gunning for my job.
58:02
All that time, me and Rachel kept persevering. You know, we moved up to spring. I started
58:06
the business. He was out there middling.
58:16
He had a couple of different things he did and
58:20
he'd come visit us every once in a while for the holidays, whatever. We'd kind of switch
58:23
out between hanging out with mom and him on the holidays.
58:27
He was there at our house that day. Me and my dad almost coming blows in the driveway the day out.
58:40
They whooped the shit out of all them Christmas lights. And he told me then,
58:44
he said, man, if something's making you feel like that, you got to cut out your life. It's
58:47
going to make you sick. It's going to ruin your health.
58:58
When my mother got sick
59:08
and it just kept getting worse and worse, he would call and he would ask to talk to me.
59:14
And his whole message was love. You got to be strong for your mom, fella.
59:22
You know, it sounds like your dad and your sister ain't...
59:25
You got to be strong for your mom. You got to let her know you're okay no matter what's
59:30
happening to her. She's got to... She can't be this sick and not think you're okay, fella.
59:38
You got to put on stiff upper lip. You got to let your mom know you're all right.
59:43
He'd been feeling bad. He'd been having...
59:46
This is off in January. Rachel's birthday is January 21st and it's coming up on her birthday and
00:01
my mom had been in a coma for a day at that point. And he was real sick and he had been
00:08
talking to Rachel. He's feeling real bad and she's like, dad, I want you to go to the hospital.
00:16
And we... I just told Rachel, I was like, let's load the truck. Let's go to Midland.
00:34
Yeah, my mom's in a coma. You can't do anything for her.
00:40
And we drove out there in Midland and they had him in the hospital. He had had a heart attack.
00:45
And they put a stint in him.
00:55
And then he went home to recover. And the day that he had... After he had the stint put in
01:03
is when my sister called me and told me mom was awake. She had come out of her coma
01:08
and we loaded up the truck and he's like, well, go be with your mom. I'm okay now.
01:15
I got some recovery time but your mom's awake. You need to go. We drove through Texas that night.
01:27
Get there and have that last day we had with my mother,
01:31
where she was awake and conscious. We took the kids over to see her and
01:38
he just told me, he said, go, go.
01:44
I can't tell y'all everything about the man but
01:48
he sure meant the world to me even when we was fighting and arguing.
01:57
He was driving a concrete truck at the time for a company called Ingram Concrete out there in
02:01
West Texas. And then trucks inside him, concrete trucks out there in Midland,
02:06
they'd get to be about 110, 120 degrees. You know, the air conditioners can't hold up to that with
02:12
all that heat from the concrete behind it. They might have got better trucks now.
02:18
Well, it started... He had another hard attack when he went back to work trying to drive a truck.
02:22
He just couldn't do it no more. We had an extra room at the time. We had moved to Conroe.
02:30
Business was going pretty well. I had a big major contract and I had a lot of side work and
02:37
Rachel told me, she's like, Dad, just come here. Come stay with us and
02:43
we'll put you on the payroll. Get you a little money every week.
02:48
You can just go up there a couple of days so I can focus on some other things and
02:53
hang out the mountain and shack. And this is where
02:57
boys started bumping heads because he thought I should be running my business a different way.
03:01
But also, he was just supposed to take a break. He was just supposed to take a break. The man,
03:07
just like any of most of us, he'd know how to take a break. So he'd get up there and he
03:12
overworked himself and he'd get all hot and feeling bad and stuff. Pop, why are you doing it?
03:16
You don't even do all this. We had a big fight, man. At that time, I was running that whole
03:22
property and I was the face on the property. I was the one that had to talk to all the
03:27
residents to deal with them. Because the people I worked for didn't generally fix a whole lot of
03:33
things or have the budget to or claim they didn't have the budget to. I was the guy that had to
03:39
explain why things didn't get fixed or put people off. And he got real frustrated and
03:45
he quit talking to me for about a couple of days. He was just mad as helped me. I couldn't
03:49
figure it out. And it was Memorial Day and I just wanted him to hang out with me in the
03:53
thing. I wanted him to hang out with us and the kids and have a good time. But he was just pissed
03:57
off, wouldn't have already talked to me. And I just, he was a very, he wasn't a
04:02
confrontational guy. And I just walked up to him in the garage and I go, Hey man,
04:09
are you going to be pissed off at me forever? Or can we just talk about whatever the
04:13
shit you're mad about and get this out of our system? Because I would really love for you
04:17
to hang out with your family. It's Memorial Day. We're going to grill some food and
04:23
have a good time. I'd like you to just enjoy it with us.
04:28
And he, he said, boy, I just, he said, when I tell somebody I'm going to do something,
04:33
I do something. When I tell somebody I'm going to do something, I do it.
04:38
And you, I watch you go around that property and you tell these people, all these things
04:41
you're going to do, you don't ever do them. I was like, well, I'm not allowed to do them.
04:45
I don't have money to do them. But I have to tell them something, put them off. He goes,
04:50
well, tell them it's not getting done. Be honest with them, Phil. Man ought to be able to say,
04:55
if man says he's going to do something, man ought to do it.
05:01
I was like, I don't think you understand my job. He said, well, then you need to find a better
05:06
job if that's what your job is. It's just going to ruin you. Boy, I was mad at him,
05:11
but we, we sell it off. We all have Memorial Day together and hung out.
05:20
Me and him, we, we got the, he had another heart attack at work and I was like,
05:26
I can't have you out there on property. You're too much liability with the heart problems.
05:31
And I'm sure in some way, he suspected that was disrespectful. And he got to where he wouldn't
05:38
even hardly talk. He'd just glare at me. He was so mad at me.
05:41
He wanted me to cut my hair. He didn't, he didn't, he really can't have long hair all
05:48
your life. First time to grow up. But I got, I found a little nugget to wisdom on,
05:57
still not about the hair, but about, it wasn't long after that I decided I was going to become
06:02
the man who did do what I said I was going to do. And I started telling them people the
06:05
truth and did not make me popular at that property. And I did end up quitting that gig
06:14
sometime afterwards.
06:22
Here he died. Actually, I quit that gig. So I didn't want to put up with them people anymore.
06:27
Then I fell off a roof and broke my body all the hell. But
06:30
it was all, he was always, he wasn't even mad at me. He was giving me lessons.
06:40
I regret, I regret that little, that, that whatever that was, that thumping chest
06:47
shit we were doing and bumping heads. He ended up moving out. There was too much for Rachel.
06:54
And we arguing all the time.
07:03
You know, he went up to, he had a buddy in college station, his buddy, Tom, that he grew up with
07:07
that ran all the maintenance out at A&M and went up to college station. He worked for Tom for a
07:13
little while. And eventually made his way back to Midland.
07:19
Got him a job with the water company, found him some good housing.
07:35
And Rachel would get back on even kill. Me and them hadn't really spoke a lot, you know.
07:53
We bought the house when they moved in.
08:10
Come about January, 2015. He was feeling bad again, feeling sick.
08:17
Rachel, he's going to go back to the hospital.
08:24
They decided they were going to do another stint or something. I don't remember 100% what it was.
08:31
They told him he had to stop taking that medicine. He was taking his cell bricks
08:38
Damn, Madderall was jacking with me.
08:46
And I couldn't leave work at the time. So Rachel flew out. I took the kids, kept the kids and
08:54
Rachel flew out to Midland to be with him while he had his operation. She had to fly home the next day.
09:01
And he never woke up from his operation. He had a stroke on the table and
09:09
never woke up from the operation. Y'all heard that story.
09:12
We lost him that, I believe it was February, early February 2015.
09:22
And it destroyed my wife. It broke her heart a million pieces.
09:26
Pieces that will never be, but she'll never be the same person again that she was before that
09:30
happened. She'll never be the same person without him in this world. That kind of loss changes you.
09:42
I think we're going to wrap it up right there.
09:56
Do some testimonials, you know.
09:57
A few testimonials. I got my act together today.
10:17
Oh, sister Amy Irish, look at her. Oh, sentiment girl. So happy to hear for these testimonials from
10:25
last season's last podcast where I told the story about Mr. Forrest.
10:30
So happy to hear Forrest found you and he was able to articulate how profound and meaningful
10:36
directing our podcast has been and to give you clarity that it's not just for you,
10:40
it's for us with each and every episode. Thank you Forrest. I'm glad Forrest found me too, Amy.
10:48
Forrest affected the entire way I was looking at this thing. I was looking at it in a very
10:53
selfish manner and Forrest showed me that that was not the way to go about it.
11:02
They made me new eyes, brought me into season three feeling renewed.
11:11
At ATX Nomad 698. Hey, man, found you through your AC monologue. Just want to say you're
11:18
incredible writer and storyteller. I know nothing about cars. I still find myself glued
11:23
to your stories. Thanks for sharing your life with the world. Thank you, man. I appreciate you
11:28
listening, brother. A lot of these stories ain't about cars. I love to talk cars, but a lot of
11:38
these stories are just about where I was in my life. And that's the whole thing. We're working
11:44
on the book right now. I hadn't even told y'all this. So now instead of one book deal, I
11:51
have two. So I had so much from the first podcast that we decided that to cut it. It was at a
12:02
thousand pages and we'd cut any more of it. It was just going to be so we made two books
12:07
and our publishers on board with it and just totally excited about it. And so it looks
12:12
like it's going to be two books now instead of just one.
12:15
At James Norman, J.W., it's not necessarily the cars that draw me to your podcast,
12:22
much as it is the life stories you share. I relate so much to your childhood stories.
12:27
It's almost like you're talking about my childhood in a way. That being said, I'll
12:32
still be watching your podcast and following you even when you run out of car stories to
12:36
talk about. Like you, there are certain cars or pickups I can look at and remember a
12:41
part of my childhood and thought I was the only one that was like that until I found your YouTube channel.
12:47
My poor wife, I swear, thinks that I've lost my mind because we'll be going somewhere and I see a
12:52
car or truck and I'll think about a certain memory or era of my childhood or teenage years and
12:58
go into a long drawn out story where they're about that memory and whatever family member
13:03
owned that type of vehicle. Keep on keeping on brother. I hope this continues to be a
13:07
success for you as many years as you're able to do this. You relate to so many people like me
13:13
that it's almost like we have found another home. That's how I feel about it. Thank you
13:18
very much for that. Enjoy reading that. That's all. I'm just trying to be a little light
13:26
in the darkness here, folks. I know I'm not splitting the atom. There's a better podcast
13:31
out there. I'm sure that y'all can spend your energy and time listening to.
13:39
But I just, I like thinking, man, if I can just be a positive voice in the dark, then that's,
13:44
I can be a little light in the dark for people. Maybe they won't struggle as much as I did
13:49
to find some peace. It took me a long time to find my peace and it was right in front of
13:55
me the whole damn time. The thing about life, church, is you never know who you are to somebody else.
14:16
You ain't allowed to. It ain't, it ain't written down anywhere you can read it.
14:26
Oh, you can, you can hear what they say about you. Sure. You can catch a whisper when your name rolls
14:33
across somebody else's supper table. But you'll never, not in this life, see yourself the way they see.
14:44
Every man, every woman, every passing soul carries a different version of you in their mind.
14:57
Hundreds of reflections in a hundred cracked mirrors and somewhere in that swarm of reflections,
15:04
a whole mess of folks got you figured for nothing but dust and failure.
15:10
And that's all right. That's all right.
15:21
Because the truth is, you don't live in everybody. You live in the few, the few who love you,
15:33
the few who know your name in their marrow and call you by it even when you're stumbling.
15:41
I confess to you tonight, I've lost night staring at the ceiling wondering what pop thought of me.
15:49
He was never shy about telling me what he didn't like. He was never stingy with correction.
15:54
And still, I like to believe
16:02
that when the dust settled, he loved me.
16:10
He loved me enough to hand me a blessing, loved me enough to open his hand and place in it the most
16:20
sacred life he had on this earth. Rachel, Lord have mercy. When I was 30 years old, broke down and
16:30
bent more boy than man, more fool than husband, I looked them in the eyes and asked him for
16:35
that blessing. And I'll tell you plain, he didn't take as long to say yes as I might have had. I've
16:42
been the gatekeeper. So maybe I'll never know the full weight of his thoughts, but I do know this.
16:52
There was a moment in his life where I was good enough, good enough for the most precious thing
16:59
he had. And I like to think tonight that he's watching, nodding, enjoying these small victories
17:05
being hurt or stacking up together. That's why I stand here every week and I tell you I'm rooting for
17:16
you. Because sometimes it don't take the world believing. Sometimes it just takes a handful of people
17:23
betting on you, lifting you, carrying you into the next chapter. So hear me. There is room at
17:28
this table. There's room in this family. There's room in this life for every single one of us.
17:36
I'm J.W., and I love you.
17:48
These days I sit on these days. That's the name of the song. These days. These days. Greg Allman
17:55
covered it. It's a Jackson Brown song. Go listen to it and think about everything you ain't
18:01
ever done right and then get over that shit. But listen to that song these days.
18:07
Welcome to season three, boners. I love you.