The Tappet Brothers tackle a variety of quirky car-related questions and anecdotes, including the mysterious 'whoop tube' from a caller's Lincoln Town Car. They humorously discuss the impact of their show on local politics, share stories about a Honda Civic with a bra, and delve into the challenges of driving with a malfunctioning door. The episode is filled with witty banter, practical advice, and a puzzler that leaves listeners pondering. The brothers also revisit past callers to see how their advice held up over time.
Lee’s Lincoln Town Car feels like it wants to brake on it’s own when cruising down the highway. His mechanic decided that it’s a problem with the “Whoop Tube”. Click and Clack and the rest of us hoping to find out what the heck a “Whoop Tube” is on this very episode of the Best of Car Talk.
"Guys, I got a 1994 Lincoln Town Car. I bought it new in 1994. Got 103,000 miles on it and it kicks and bucks on me occasionally."
The Lincoln Town Car is a big, comfortable car that was made for luxury. It's often used as a fancy taxi or limousine because it has a lot of room inside.
The Lincoln Town Car is a full-size luxury sedan that was produced by Lincoln from 1981 to 2011. It is known for its spacious interior and smooth ride, making it a popular choice for limousines and luxury transportation.
"Got 103,000 miles on it and it kicks and bucks on me occasionally. The symptoms are like you'd be going down the road and all of a sudden it's like you kept the brake and that's the buck..."
When a car 'kicks and bucks', it means it suddenly shakes or jumps while driving, which can be a sign that something is wrong with the engine or transmission.
The terms 'kicks and bucks' refer to a vehicle's erratic behavior, often indicating transmission issues or engine misfires. This can happen when the car unexpectedly jerks or shifts gears abruptly.
"...it's like you kept the brake and that's the buck and then it'll kick back up like, no, it's grabbed another gear or something..."
The transmission is what helps your car change gears so it can go faster or slower. If it's not working right, the car can feel jerky or jumpy.
The transmission is a crucial component of a vehicle that transfers power from the engine to the wheels, allowing the car to move. Issues with the transmission can lead to problems like the 'kicks and bucks' described.
"I had a little, a really cute little Honda Civic 5-speed that I got a couple months ago..."
The Honda Civic is a small car that many people like because it's dependable and gets good gas mileage.
The Honda Civic is a popular compact car known for its reliability and fuel efficiency. It has been a favorite among drivers for decades and is available in various trims and configurations.
"So I went ahead and fold that car, which is a great car. And I got a little Ford ZX2."
The Ford ZX2 is a small, sporty car that Ford made a while ago. It's designed to be fun to drive.
The Ford ZX2 is a compact coupe that was produced by Ford in the late 1990s and early 2000s. It is known for its sporty design and fun driving experience.
"...ing to these notes, she called about her 91 Dodge Spirit. Don't remember her."
The Dodge Spirit is a family car that was made in the early '90s. It's known for being roomy and a good choice for people who need a reliable vehicle without spending too much money.
The Dodge Spirit is a midsize sedan produced from 1989 to 1995, known for its spacious interior and affordability. The 1991 model is part of the first generation and was popular for its comfortable ride and practical features. It may be discussed for its nostalgic value and as an example of early '90s American sedans.
"It was an O2 sensor. The O2 sensor was malfunctioning so badly that the car thought it was flooding and it stopped giving itself gas."
An O2 sensor is a part of the car that checks how much oxygen is in the exhaust. This helps the engine run better and produce fewer emissions.
An O2 sensor, or oxygen sensor, measures the amount of oxygen in the exhaust gases of an internal combustion engine. It helps the engine control unit (ECU) adjust the air-fuel mixture for optimal combustion and emissions control.
"It's a 1989 Chevy pickup. How big a pickup? It's a full-size. K1500."
The Chevy K1500 is a large truck made by Chevrolet, designed for heavy-duty use. It's known for being strong and reliable, often used for work and towing.
The Chevy K1500 is a full-size pickup truck produced by Chevrolet, known for its durability and versatility. It was part of the C/K series of trucks, which were popular in the late 20th century.
Car
Chevrolet 350
"Well, it's got a Chevy 350.
Yeah."
The Chevrolet 350 is a type of engine used in many Chevy cars and trucks. It's known for being powerful and dependable, making it a favorite among car enthusiasts.
The Chevrolet 350 is a small-block V8 engine that has been widely used in various Chevrolet vehicles since the 1960s. Known for its reliability and performance, it has become a popular choice for both street and racing applications.
The antifreeze reservoir is where the liquid that cools the engine is stored. It helps keep the engine from getting too hot while the car is running.
The antifreeze reservoir is a container in a vehicle that holds the coolant fluid used to regulate engine temperature. It is essential for preventing the engine from overheating and maintaining optimal operating conditions.
"Well, everybody says that it's the valve cover gasket, except for my mechanic. And he doesn't think that it's possible that that could be the case."
The valve cover gasket is a rubber or silicone seal that keeps oil from leaking out of the engine. If it fails, you might see oil spots under your car.
The valve cover gasket is a seal that sits between the valve cover and the engine block, preventing oil leaks. It's important for maintaining proper oil pressure and preventing contamination in the engine.
"The head gasket. It is a small chance that it's the head gaskets."
The head gasket is a seal that keeps the engine's oil and coolant from mixing. If it fails, it can cause big problems like overheating or engine damage.
The head gasket is a critical component that seals the engine block and cylinder head, preventing coolant and oil from mixing. A blown head gasket can lead to serious engine damage and overheating.
"Well, you know, you might want to investigate buying an engine right from GM. I think it's called a crate motor."
A crate motor is a complete engine that you can buy and install in your car. It's ready to go, so you don't have to build it yourself.
A crate motor is a fully assembled engine that is sold as a complete unit, ready to be installed in a vehicle. These engines are often used for replacements or upgrades in various vehicles, providing a convenient option for car enthusiasts and mechanics.
"Yeah, I don't know. They used to call them target engines."
Target engines are engines made for replacing old ones or improving performance in cars. They are built to fit specific needs.
Target engines refer to a specific type of engine that is designed for replacement or performance upgrades. They are typically factory-built and intended to meet certain specifications for various applications.
"...then it's either the cracked cylinder head or cracked block. Or he said a weeping block maybe."
The cylinder head is a part of the engine that helps with the combustion process. It holds important parts like valves and spark plugs that help the engine run.
The cylinder head is the component that sits on top of the engine block and contains the combustion chambers, valves, and spark plugs. It plays a crucial role in the engine's performance and efficiency.
"...then it's either the cracked cylinder head or cracked block. Or he said a weeping block maybe."
The engine block is the main part of the engine where everything happens. It holds the cylinders and other important parts that make the engine work.
The engine block is the main structure of the engine, housing the cylinders and other key components. It is typically made of cast iron or aluminum and is essential for the engine's operation.
"...What kind of a car do you have? It's an 88 Honda Accord. What do you have tied to the back door?"
The Honda Accord is a popular car that many people drive because it's dependable and gets good gas mileage. The 1988 version is an older model that people still like because it lasts a long time and is comfortable to drive.
The Honda Accord is a midsize car that has been in production since 1976, known for its reliability, fuel efficiency, and spacious interior. The 1988 model is part of the third generation, which was praised for its advanced engineering and comfortable ride. It is often discussed for its longevity and value as a used car option.
"So the dome lights on all the time. You have to get the fuse out for that."
The dome light is a light inside the car that turns on when you open the doors or press a button. It helps you see inside the car when it's dark.
The dome light is an interior light in a vehicle that provides illumination when the doors are opened or when activated by a switch. It's useful for visibility inside the car, especially at night.
"And the hinges may be all worn out so the doors sag down even more. And the latch is kind of, actually, the metal is almost ripped out of the screws."
Hinges are the parts that let the door swing open and closed. If they get old or damaged, the door might not work right and could even fall off.
Hinges are the mechanical components that allow doors to pivot open and closed. Worn hinges can cause doors to sag, making them difficult to close properly and potentially unsafe.
"...because his truck was broken down. So I took the bus and he used my car. So I've only been doing it f..."
The Volkswagen Bus is a classic van that people love for its unique look and ability to carry a lot of passengers or cargo. It's famous for being used by families and travelers, especially in the 1960s and 70s.
The Volkswagen Bus, also known as the VW Type 2 or Kombi, is an iconic vehicle that has been beloved since its introduction in the late 1940s. Known for its distinctive shape and versatility, it has become a symbol of counterculture and adventure. It is often discussed for its cultural significance and the nostalgia it evokes among enthusiasts.
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Hello and welcome to Car Talk from National Public Radio.
With us, Click & Clack, the Tappet Brothers, and we're broadcasting this week from the Political Consulting Division here at Car Talk Plaza.
Now, we wanted to share with you the great reach, the great impact that Car Talk is having on the political establishment in this country.
I can hardly wait.
Well, as you know, we never endorse candidates because we think they're all a bunch of what?
Jerks.
Gas bags. However, we have had contact with a few so-called politicians and the results have been very enlightening.
Haven't they been?
I don't know.
Well, you may remember some weeks ago, we tipped our hats to the mayor of Brooklyn, Ohio, which was the first city in the country to ban talking on a cell phone while driving.
I do remember that we did that.
We thought that was pretty courageous stuff and we said, good for you, Mayor John Coyne. That's the guy's name.
Yeah.
Well, we just got the word that Mayor Coyne, who has been mayor of Brooklyn for like 75 years, was recently voted out of office.
So, we want to apologize to former Mayor Coyne for any role that we may have played in destroying this.
Oh, that's what you remember. The great impact that Car Talk has on the political establishment.
Then we get word from our own fair city. Remember Catherine with a K?
Catherine with a K, which was last name started with a T.
From the Cambridge City Council, well, she was trying to get our very own fair city to ban cell phone use while driving.
Yeah, what happened to her?
Got hit by a bread truck.
Pretty close. She lost her reelection this month.
And so, we want to apologize to Catherine for the untimely demise of what seemed like a promising political career.
I mean, she was only a young kid and that's it, nipped right in the bud.
Yeah, well, maybe she can get a job at McDonald's. Maybe she can go back and get a degree in art history.
Quickie Lube.
Okay.
In the meantime, you can call us and ask us questions about anything at all.
Even your car. The number is 1-888-CAR-TALK. That's 888-227-8255.
Maybe it should be anything talk.
Could be.
We could do that.
Even your car.
Even your car.
Yeah.
Hello, you want anything talk?
Hey, guys.
What do you want to talk about? Anything?
Well, yeah, anything. This is Lee down in Nacodish, Louisiana.
Lee?
Right.
Where are you again?
Nacodish, Louisiana.
Nacodish.
It's pronounced K-N-A-C-K-A-D-I-S-H.
Yeah, that's what I wrote. I wrote dish down there.
Nacodish.
What's up, Lee?
Guys, I got a 1994 Lincoln town car.
I bought it new in 1994. Got 103,000 miles on it and it kicks and bucks on me occasionally.
The symptoms are like you'd be going down the road and all of a sudden it's like you
kept the brake and that's the buck and then it'll kick back up like, no, it's grabbed
another gear or something and then it'll settle down and it may not do it again for a long
time and then it may do it again for the next five miles.
I don't get it yet.
You're driving along, say, 35, 40 miles an hour?
It could be 35.
It could be 25.
It could be 85.
And you touched the brake pedal.
No.
It feels like you touched the brake pedal.
It feels like you touched the brake pedal.
It just out of the blue.
It suddenly feels almost like stopping and then it picks up again.
Right.
Now, this happened about three years ago when I took it in and they said it was the whoop
tube.
Yeah, I would have thought that.
And I said, well, what in the world is the whoop tube?
I would have said that.
It's this big tube that goes behind the fuel injectors down into the transmission and they
replaced it and it ran great.
And it just started to back up about six, seven months ago.
Really?
So I wondered if y'all had ever heard of that.
A whoop tube?
A whoop.
That's what he called it.
Well, I never heard of a whoop tube.
Well, I just wanted to get another opinion.
Well, you got one.
If y'all never heard of it.
No.
So did this guy give you a whoop tube, huh?
Yeah.
He said it ran from where to where?
Yeah.
It runs from the back of the fuel injectors.
It kind of hooks into the, you know, with the breather system and then runs down into
the front of the transmission and it's about a two inch diameter tube.
And it's kind of, you know, it's bent a little bit.
The snake down between the firewall.
So you've seen this thing.
Yeah, I saw it.
Yeah.
It's about two and a half feet long.
Was it broken?
Yeah.
It had a hole in it.
That would explain everything.
Well, I wish I could help you.
I mean, I never heard of a whoop tube and I can't even imagine what this thing is.
Well, have you heard of any other reason why the transmission would kick and butt like that?
There is a snorkel that conveys fresh air from the air cleaner into the intake manifold.
Well, maybe that's what it, maybe that's what they call it in the whoop tube.
Well, whoop.
You know, there's some funny things to go on down there.
So it could be that that in fact is what had a hole in it and that can cause the thing
to momentarily lose power and to misbehave on acceleration.
But there's no connection between the engine and the transmission with this whoop tube.
So you need to have some, but you need to have whoop tube removed and see if in fact
it's got a hole in it like it did the last time.
I mean, is that guy, is that guy still around?
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's got a shop over here.
Well, it's only like 125 bucks.
Yeah.
I mean, I wouldn't mess with it.
I mean, I know it's nice to get a second opinion, but you ain't going to get one from us.
And you spent half of that on the phone call.
No, this is your nickel guy.
Oh, geez.
All right.
We'll see you later.
Okay, bye-bye.
Bye.
Good luck.
1-888-CAR-TALK.
That's 1-888-227-8255.
Hello, you're on Car Talk.
Hi, this is Jackie.
Hi, Jackie.
How are you?
Jackie.
Jackie in Portland, Oregon.
So it must just be a good old C-K-I-E, right?
It is.
None of that music stuff.
C-Q-I-Y-Z.
I know.
It's so silly.
It is.
It is.
I like the way I spell my name.
Good for you.
Yeah.
So what's up?
Well, I had a little, a really cute little Honda Civic 5-speed that I got a couple months
ago, and I couldn't get over being terrified of driving a stick and like planning my route.
Like, where can I, how can I get where I'm going without stopping on a hill?
So I went ahead and fold that car, which is a great car.
And I got a little Ford ZX2.
What's that?
It's a sporty escort.
It's actually an escort.
Oh, yeah.
It's a sporty model.
Yeah.
Brand new?
No.
It had 3,000 miles on it and C-year-old.
Oh.
And the problem is the car came wearing this cute little black bra.
Yeah.
And I really like how it looks.
From Victoria's Secret.
Victoria's Secret.
Right.
It's cute.
Yeah.
They sell that.
It's on page 31.
I happen to see it just today.
Yes.
Especially made for the VX2.
And I like how it looks, but I don't know if it's okay to wash, I haven't washed this
car and I've had it for almost two months because I don't know if I should take the bra
off it when I wash it, but I'm afraid if I take it off, I won't be able to get it back
on.
So I have a bra problem.
Jackie.
What does your instinct tell you?
I mean, what would you do with everybody?
You know, I started to say I've never had a bra on a car and I've never really understood
the purpose of them.
Although I know what the expressed purpose is.
It just seems so damn silly to me.
I can't believe it.
And I would guess, first of all, I mean, if it rains, you don't take the thing off.
Yeah.
So you take it through the cow wash.
So you take it through the cow wash and soap and everything.
No, but if you're going to wash the thing, you want to get all the grime and grit out
of there.
It's like taking a shower with your underwear.
Come on.
You don't do that?
That way you wash your underwear.
That way you never have to change your underwear.
But it takes three hours before you can get dressed.
You're going to run around the house and stay in front of the fans.
Well, you know, that's what I was thinking.
It would feel a little soggy, but then I thought, I'll never get the thing back on.
No, you won't get it back on either.
And that's what you should do.
You should take it off, wash the car and throw that stupid thing away.
That's what my boyfriend said.
And I said, no, but I like how it looks.
Oh, you do?
Yeah, I do.
What's wrong with you?
Well, it's just, normally I don't like this car because it breaks it up because it's this
sage color and it's got this black.
It's really kind of cute.
Well, I wonder how much the thing costs.
Oh, a lot.
Yeah, I bet.
Yeah.
Like what?
A hundred bucks?
Well, yeah, I'm sure it does.
I mean, if you go through the car wash once, the thing is not going to fall apart.
You might be able to go through the car wash five or six times.
Well, you got to worry about shrinkage.
I'm low, you know, low setting.
But it hurt my car.
Oh, it won't hurt the car.
It won't hurt the car, except that if you did it for many, many times, water would certainly
get trapped between the car and the bra.
And that wouldn't be good.
Okay.
Yeah.
Well, you may have to contact the bra manufacturer to see what they have to say.
I mean, there must be some literature about this someplace.
I have tried to find it and I have had no luck.
I've even sat around in my car close to another car, like a fancy, expensive car that has a
bra on it, waiting for somebody to come out and say, aha, what do you do?
That's exactly what I was going to suggest.
I mean, I'm sure that there must be more, many of our listeners who have maybe not.
I was thinking that.
Because it's really a dorky thing, huh?
Well, it's a BMW thing, you know?
Oh, okay.
And quite honestly, the people that had the real high performance cars, I mean, come
on, yours really isn't the high performance car.
It's an automatic.
Yeah, and an automatic to boot.
Must chuckle a little bit when they see you go by and say, oh, God, you should take that
thing off.
Well, here's what I would suggest.
If it were my car, I wouldn't want to have to go through this agony and angst, among
other things.
And I would, even though you like the look of it, I would take the thing off and paint
one on.
There you go.
Huh?
That way you get the look.
No one will know.
Yeah.
And you don't have to worry when you go through the cow wash.
No, that's an idea.
There you go.
There I go.
All my problems are solved.
See ya, Jackie.
Good luck, Jackie.
Thanks a lot, guys.
Bye.
Bye-bye.
All right, Tommy, do you remember last week's puzzler?
All right, just give me a hint.
Help me out here.
Just a little hint.
Well, I'll give you a hint.
It had to do with a bonk.
Actually, many bonks in the head.
Bonk in the head.
Yeah.
Something I can relate to, but I have no idea.
I'll have the answer in just a minute.
Our state of stigma report helped us understand that believing in mental health is easy,
but asking for help is not.
Now, with the report on our hands, we can work to make mental health care more accessible.
To get matched with a therapist, visit betterhelp.com.npr for 10% off your first month.
This is our glass.
On this American life, one thing we like is a good mystery, sometimes about really big things,
but most times, the little mysteries are the best.
Our lost and found is currently filled with pants.
I don't know.
I've never seen this happen.
Is this true?
This is true.
Mysteries of every size, each week, this American life, wherever you get your podcasts.
Hi, we're back.
You're listening to Car Talk with us, Click and Clack the Tappet Brothers,
and we're here to talk about cars, car repair, and da, the answer to last week's historic
and folklore puzzler, and here it is.
And I still don't know what it is, historic and folklore.
Well, this puzzler just happened to have come from my vast pile of puzzler suggestions,
which I am slowly working through the date on this one, December 31st, 94.
And it came from Benjamin Schultz, who I think was a high school student when he sent me this,
and he's probably married with kids and driving a minivan now, but who knows?
We'll hear from him.
I hope.
Here it is.
At the beginning of the First World War, the uniform of the British soldiers included a brown cloth cap.
Ah, yes.
They had not yet discovered the advantages of metal helmets.
But as the war went on, the war office became alarmed at the high proportion of men suffering head injuries.
They therefore decided to replace the cloth caps with metal helmets.
Da!
Well, it's military intelligence and you know what that is.
Yeah, an oxymoron.
From then on, all soldiers wore the metal helmets.
However, and this is the puzzling part, the war office was amazed to discover that there were more soldiers
hospitalized with head injuries than ever before.
Now it can be assumed that the intensity of fighting was the same before and after the metal helmets were introduced.
So why should the recorded number of head injuries per battalion increase when the men were wearing metal helmets rather than cloth helmets?
And I know the answer too.
Well, it's just an example of how statistics can lie to people and have people crying out,
I knew we shouldn't have been using those damn helmets.
And the reason is rather simple.
Before the helmets, anyone that got hit with a piece of shrapnel and wearing a cloth helmet.
Did not have any injuries.
No, he was dead.
He was a goner.
At least with the helmets, people got a chance to survive and become part of the statistic.
Of injuries.
Of injuries, exactly.
Better to be a statistic injury, an injury statistic than not at all.
Death statistic.
And that's exactly it.
In fact, without the helmets, they had many more fatalities.
And with the helmets, they had fewer fatalities, but more injuries.
And you don't think you're going to catch flak on this one?
Not me.
Benjamin Shultz.
I thought we were going to hear from him, but now I know we're not under here.
He's going to be laring me Wyoming.
He probably mailed a letter yesterday because he heard the puzzle.
He heard his name mentioned last week and he sent them.
And now he's at the post office trying to get the letter back.
Well, I thought it was pretty good.
Otherwise I wouldn't have viewed it.
I love it.
I'm with you, Ben.
I love it because it's so obfuscated and twisted.
And we have a winner.
The winner is Marilyn Murphy from Chattanooga, Tennessee.
And for having her answer selected at random from among all the thousands of correct answers that we got,
Marilyn is going to get a $25 gift certificate to the Car Talk Shameless Commerce Division
with which she can get, among other things, a copy of our brand new album.
Why you should never listen to your father when it comes to cars.
You've heard of gifts for the person who has everything.
Well, this is a gift for the person who thinks he knows everything.
Your father.
Good work, Marilyn.
Anyway, we'll have a new, I would have to say...
Challenging, folkloric, historic.
Let's not build it up too much.
We'll have a different puzzle coming up.
Well, that's something.
That's something.
That doesn't always happen.
I had to go for a modifier and I found one.
Different is good.
It'll be occurring in the third half or maybe the fourth half of today's show.
We'll see how much energy we have.
So stay tuned for that.
Hey, you'll never guess what it's time for.
Time to blow the autumn leaves onto my neighbor's lawn.
No.
It's time to play Stump the Chumps.
Stump the Chumps is our lame attempt at quality control.
When we invite a caller back from a previous show and find out just how bad our advice really was.
And whether a settlement conference is still a possibility.
So who's stumping the Chumps this week?
It is Colleen.
I have notes from this.
Colleen from Minneapolis, Minnesota.
And according to these notes, she called about her 91 Dodge Spirit.
Don't remember her.
And she said, I quote, I'd be driving along up there on the Minnesota highways.
Yeah.
And the car just losing speed.
Don't you know?
Yeah.
Did she say that?
Yeah.
You bet you.
It's all coming.
It starts going slower to the point where I'm putting on my hazards and eventually it
just stops and starts driving again.
And you are trying to get over from the far left lane to the far right lane?
Without getting run over by the big truck honking at me behind exactly.
And this has recovered on its own every time?
Every time.
So I got desperate and took it to a Dodge dealer.
There you go.
Yeah, I'm thinking they would know.
And what they want to do is put a co-pilot test on it, which is some machine they hook
into the electrical system and I push the button every time it happens.
Right.
But it's like a $150 test.
So I'm wondering if that's money well spent or if I should just drive this.
You said you were putting your life in danger.
Is your life not worth $150?
Well, it depends.
Not worth $150?
Boy, they have frugal up there in Minnesota, aren't they?
Boy, good thing we don't work up there.
We never make any of our boat payments.
If I remember correctly, we told Colleen that the problem certainly could be fixed.
It was probably a fuel related problem.
Either a plug fuel filter or more likely a weak fuel pump.
I remember.
I don't.
I remember.
Well, let's find out.
Colleen.
Yeah.
Are you there?
I'm here.
Before we ask you what was wrong with your car, we have to come and mirandize you.
Will you please certify that the answers you're about to give here today on Stump The Chumps
have not been influenced by our staff, the staff of National Public Radio,
or that keeler guy who's just trying to make us look bad.
Is that true, Colleen?
That's true.
Okay.
Okay, go ahead.
Let us have it.
I'm sorry you were wrong.
Again?
Colleen.
How wrong were we?
It was an O2 sensor.
The O2 sensor was malfunctioning so badly that the car thought it was flooding
and it stopped giving itself gas.
Yeah, that is certainly a good answer.
Well, so you went for the pilot, the co-pilot?
I actually took it to a different mechanic and I asked them to do the test that you had told
me and several $7500 worth of diagnostics later they came back and said it was the O2 sensor.
Oh, so they did a scan test.
Yep.
Oh, so we're half right.
Do we get credit for that?
I mean half?
Well, I mean...
No.
I guess no partial credit?
No partial credit.
Oh my God.
Oh, my professors in college are like that too.
Motion denied.
Colleen, you've been a good sport to play and we want to thank you for playing Stump the
Chumps.
And I'm glad that you got the thing fixed because you were putting yourself in harm's
way there.
That's true.
Thank you.
You'll never be on car talk again, but that's all right.
Thanks a lot.
Thank you.
See you, Colleen.
Wow.
Oh, jeez.
Well, I mean...
Well, I mean...
Let me just look at the notes.
What did we actually say to her?
It was probably a fuel-related problem.
Now, it could have been a non-fuel-related problem, but we said it was a fuel-related problem.
It sounded fuel to me, especially when she said it felt like it was running out of gas.
Well, we suddenly looked fuel-ish today.
Okay.
1-888-CAR-TALK.
That's 924-928-934-555-squared.
Isn't it really?
Try it.
It works.
942-455-point-839-455-squared.
Wow.
Is 1-888-CAR-TALK.
Try it.
It works.
Hello, you're on car talk.
This is Wayne.
I'm from Brighton, Michigan.
Hi, Wayne.
Brighton, Michigan.
Yeah.
What's going on in Brighton, Michigan?
Well, I guess my automobile is not running too well.
We're here to help, Wayne.
Okay.
He's crying out in the darkness.
What kind of a GM car is it?
How'd you know?
Michigan.
It's a 1989 Chevy pickup.
How big a pickup?
How big?
It's a full-size.
K1500.
Okay.
4x4.
Better.
Extended cab?
No, not extended cab.
Okay.
By swing back.
Vented underarm gussets.
All right, Wayne.
What's up?
Well, it's got a Chevy 350.
Yeah.
And there's oil in the reservoir.
What reservoir?
The antifreeze reservoir.
Oh.
That is...
Oh, boy.
That stinks.
That's not good.
How do you know it's oil?
I've stuck my finger in it and I've had other people look at it.
I had my mechanic look at it.
Are there like little globules floating around in the antifreeze?
No, it's about an inch thick.
Oh, jeez, Wayne.
Yeah, so what do you want?
Prayers or just compassion?
What do you want?
What can we do to fly?
What does the sandal v know?
Yeah.
Well, everybody says that it's the valve cover gasket, except for my mechanic.
And he doesn't think that it's possible that that could be the case.
The valve cover gasket?
The engine.
The head gasket.
The head gasket.
It is a small chance that it's the head gaskets.
One of the head gaskets.
Yeah, but he didn't want to get into that.
Find out that that was a problem and charge me all this money to tell me that you need
to buy just buy a new motor and I'll put it in.
How many miles are on this thing, Wayne?
122,000.
Well, you know, you might want to investigate buying an engine right from GM.
I think it's called a crate motor.
Well, it's going to go into a crate.
Yeah, I don't know.
They used to call them target engines.
The target is like the engine compartment.
I don't know why.
Amen.
Drop it in.
Yeah, they bring it by helicopter.
You just stay there with the hood open all the way.
And, you know, it might be a lot cheaper to do that than to go exploring like you want
to do because once he takes off the heads and finds out that the heads, the head gaskets
aren't in fact gone, then it's either the cracked cylinder head or cracked block.
Or he said a weeping block maybe.
Or a weeping block.
Or a weeping block.
And then you'll be a weeping driver when you find that out.
Well, let me ask you this.
Can I drive it for a while?
Yes.
About an hour.
Oh, no, you might be able to drive it for a long time.
Yeah.
You're not losing a lot of oil, obviously, because otherwise there'd be more in this bottle.
Right.
I just pull off the tube that connects to the radiator and then just put it into a container
and drain the whole thing and then just fill it back with antifreeze and it seems to be okay.
You haven't noticed the reverse is true that you're getting antifreeze in the oil?
Nope, haven't.
Yeah.
Well, actually, you're better off because getting antifreeze in the oil is worse than
getting oil in the antifreeze.
Right.
Because if you end up with more antifreeze than oil, then you're going to wreck the engine.
Well...
Yeah, I mean, if you love the truck, then I would go and get myself an engine and I would
get one of these target engines in the crate.
But in the meantime, you can drive this thing because the worst thing that can happen to
it is you wreck the engine.
Which is...
It's wrecked already.
So what?
So when do you think this will happen?
How long?
What's today?
What do you want to date?
How about just...
I'll give you an approximate time.
It's now November, right?
And winter's tough on it.
Winter's tough.
I'm going to guess you are not going to make it.
This truck will have no problem being Y2K compliant.
I will bet you make it to spring.
All right.
Put your money where your mouth is.
My money is there, man.
Ten bucks.
Ten.
I was going to go with a dollar.
We will call you back right after Christmas.
Okay.
Right after New Year's, rather.
Okay.
And if it's still running, we'll call you back on March 21st, spring.
Okay.
And if it's running, then my brother owes me ten bucks.
You got it.
All right, Wayne.
All right.
Well, thank you.
You guys have been very helpful.
So you didn't tell my brother you're driving to California for Christmas?
I don't care.
You can go anywhere you want.
He will make it to spring.
Drive the hell out of it, Wayne.
All right.
See you later.
Okay.
All right.
Look, it's time to take a short break.
That's right.
We have to fill up my brother's coffee IV.
We'll be back in a minute.
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Ha!
We're back.
You're listening to Car Talk with us, Click and Clack the Tappet Brothers, and we're
here to discuss cars, car repair, and whatever.
Oh, the new puzzler.
I can hardly wait.
Well, like I said, I have a huge, my brother knows, an enormous selection of potentially
crummy puzzlers.
And this is in the least crummy pile?
Do you put them in piles?
Do you have piles?
I had piles once Brighton took the medication.
Yeah, so?
You guys may, you may not like this.
And if you don't, tough.
We'll have to read what they say.
And I don't know who sent this because I lost the last page of the letter.
Wow, it's long.
Oh, it's handwritten.
Handwritten.
I like the handwritten ones.
Here it is.
You get a letter in the mail predicting the winner of a heavyweight championship match
a few weeks before the event.
Yeah.
There's no other information in the letter, just a prediction.
Yeah.
It's like the Dempsey football fight.
Football's gonna win.
Football's gonna win.
You don't take it seriously thinking it's a prank from a friend.
Nevertheless, the prediction is correct.
Oh, man, I love it already.
You receive subsequent letters predicting the winners of events a few days before they
happen.
The letters correctly predict the winners of, I said the heavyweight championship out,
the World Series.
Wow.
The NBA Finals.
Wow.
The Presidential Election.
The World Chest Championship.
I got it.
I know the question and I know the answer.
NCAA Basketball Finals.
Yeah.
The Rose Bowl.
Wow.
You are amazed these letters are always correct in their predictions.
Yeah.
Even though some are upsets.
Wow.
Shortly after the Rose Bowl, you receive a letter stating that if you send, you knew this was
coming, 10 grand to a certain address.
Yeah.
One week before the Super Bowl, you'll receive a letter with the winner of that event.
I've got it.
Yeah.
Should you?
And why?
Now, if you think you know the answer, write it on the back of a $10 bill.
What happened to $20?
Oh, no, no, no.
A holiday special, of course.
Write it on the back of a $10 bill.
Or a frozen spinach tofu egg roll.
Yeah.
And send it to Puzzler Tower, Car Talk Plaza, Box 3500, Harvard Square, Cambridge.
Our Fair City.
Matt 02238.
Or, of course, you can email your answer from the Car Talk section of cars.com if you'd
like to.
What's up?
Well, I actually have been cheering every time I got home recently because I've been driving
with my door tied shut.
I have a 1988 Honda.
That's a new movie, isn't it?
Door Tied Shut.
Well, you know, that does bring you back to your roots.
I mean, everyone should at one point in his or her life.
It's humiliating.
It's good.
It really makes you.
It grounds one.
Yes, it does.
It does.
It does.
And everyone should do that.
And getting into contorted positions in the grocery store parking lot to get in and out
the passenger side door.
Yeah, especially if you have a stick shift.
What kind of a car do you have?
It's an 88 Honda Accord.
What do you have tied to the back door?
It's really, I don't even want to tell you.
It's tied from the seat, like the neck rest, to the seatbelt.
I love it.
And it's hanging open, actually, half the time, too, because I can't get it tied tight enough.
So the dome lights on all the time.
You have to get the fuse out for that.
I think it's going ding, ding, ding.
The seatbelt's dragging on the ground.
Yeah, the beeping has been very, very challenging.
I've been driving from Annapolis to D.C. back and forth each day and listening to the beeping
the whole time.
Yeah.
And this happened because of an accident?
No, it didn't happen because of an accident.
I bought the car used two years ago, and the door always, like, didn't really close straight,
but it wasn't too bad.
And after two years of slamming it shut, it's kind of, I guess it's worn out.
The latch.
Yeah, you may have worn out the latch.
And the hinges may be all worn out so the doors sag down even more.
And the latch is kind of, actually, the metal is almost ripped out of the screws.
Oh, jeez.
It doesn't look good.
Well, you've got to fix it because this is very dangerous.
I know that's why I always feel like when I'm going faster on a corner that the door
is going to get enough momentum to swing open and pull the seat out with it because the
It's tied to the seat.
It's tied to the seat.
Yeah, and so are you.
I know.
So are you.
Wow.
I know.
That's the problem.
So how long have you been driving with the rope?
Well, I haven't been driving that long because my boyfriend was actually driving.
He drove with it for like three weeks because his truck was broken down.
So I took the bus and he used my car.
So I've only been doing it for like two weeks.
What do you do in Washington, DC?
I work at a magazine publisher.
Okay.
And your boyfriend?
He's sort of a scientist.
He works out in Maryland on doing experiments on the rivers of the bay.
On pigeons?
What?
We don't need to know any more about him.
That's enough.
Okay.
Except for the few we take home to experiment.
Working on the river banks.
Okay.
All right.
All right.
I was just curious.
But I had noticed real reason for that.
How much rust is on this car?
Not much at all.
Yeah.
Got it.
What do you think?
You could obviously try to fix it yourself, but without the benefit of seeing it, it's
going to be tough for us to recommend what you should do.
You could take it to a body shop, and there are body shops, and there are body shops.
There are some that will do a job and make it work, make it functionally okay, but not
make the thing aesthetically pleasing.
So they may have to go at the door with hammers and chisels and whatever to get it to close.
And it may be ugly when they're done, but it may be perfectly safe and functional.
And then there are body shops that will do everything correctly.
So you'll have to choose.
You want to stay away from them.
You may want to stay away from them.
Then there's always welding.
You could weld the door shut.
No.
I don't want to use the passenger's door anymore.
Yeah.
I don't know if I would recommend having your boyfriend do it because you're never going
to trust that it's going to work.
There will always be this lingering doubt.
Is this the turn on which the door...
Right now, don't forget.
Right.
The door is at least tied shut.
After he fixes it and pronounces it fixed, you'll have to rely on his ability solely.
To keep the door closed.
Right.
And I'll tell you, the fear and the anxiety will gnaw away at you to the point where you
will never, ever again make a right hand turn.
He's been pretty good in the past though.
He's a sort of scientist and you can't trust them.
They're too theoretical, you know?
Yeah.
Once they think they have the explanation for something, they choose to be...
They keep saying, well, it should have worked and I'm going to miss Melissa, but there are
more people, more fish in the sea, he'll say, and goodbye, Melissa.
Here's what you do.
I think you take it to a body shop and ask them to give you an estimate.
If they tell you they can fix it for a hundred bucks, fix it.
If they tell you, look, it needs a new door.
Well, then your boyfriend can do that.
Okay.
You can buy a door and unbolt the old one and put the new one on.
Of course, it'll be a different color.
Right.
And if you haven't already destroyed the latch and the striker, you may be able to get by.
But you can go to a junkyard and buy all that stuff off a functioning 88 Accord.
And there's probably lots of those.
And there may be lots of those in the junkyard.
Or just swap to the whole car.
Right.
You see a nice 88 Accord with the door on it?
Say, I'll give you 50 bucks for the door and the car that it's attached to.
And I'll give you my car return.
But do fix this because what you're doing now is dangerous.
Yeah, it is.
I mean, if there were to be an accident and the crew was trying to extricate you and the
door doesn't open because you get it tied to the headrest, that's no good.
Yeah, that's not good.
Okay.
See ya, Melissa.
Thank you.
Get right on this.
Okay.
Bye-bye.
See ya.
But it does.
See, the duct tape is a real good thing to tie it to.
Well, it's happened again.
You've squandered another perfectly good hour listening to carton.
I have?
Yeah, you too.
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Thanks so much for listening.
We're clicking clack to tap your buttons.
Don't drive like my brother.
Don't drive like my brother.
Or our sister.
We'll be back next week.
Bye bye.
And now, here is Car Talk Plaza's chief mechanic, Mr. Vinegal Mutz.
Thank you very much now.
If yous out there want a copy of this here show, which is number 47, just pick up your phone
and call this here number 1-888-COD-JUNK.
And yes, that's really the number.
And what if I wanted the new Car Talk CD that why you should never listen to your father
when it comes to cars, Mr. Vinegal?
Why don't I call that same number?
No, I think you sit around and tie knots in your dental floss to one like fall out of
the sky, you dope.
Of course you'll call the same number.
You'll call the shameless commerce division at 888-COD-JUNK or visit it online at the
Car Talk section of Cars.com.
The visual imagery of me sitting there tying knots in my dental floss.
That was good.
Thanks, Vinegal.
You're a very succinct.
Hey, sink this, will ya pal?
Car Talk is a production of Do We Cheat Him and How and WBUR in Boston.
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In a divided America, a neutron is emerging among those on the political left.
After seeing J6, I started getting interested in getting supply arms training.
On the Sunday Story, meet the liberals, the people of color and LGBTQ folks who are
arming themselves because they fear more civil unrest.
Listen now to the Sunday Story on the Up First podcast from NPR.
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