Jerry Wayne Lumber shares a mix of personal updates and automotive projects, including his first paid acting gig in a TV commercial and the ongoing rebuild of a complex transmission. He discusses plans to move his podcast content to Patreon to avoid ads and support his work. The episode also covers a recent live show in Austin, Texas, and the camaraderie of road trips with friends. Alongside automotive talk, Jerry reflects on practical workwear tips and the challenges of maintaining classic vehicles, all delivered with his signature storytelling style.
Why JW makes fun of brands, the truth behind Dawn soap and the Exxon Valdez, and why you don’t need the right boots to be worthy. Plus a road trip, the Austin show, Avalanche updates, and a new Duwali Bottoms. All are welcome in the house of internal combustion.
"There were some extra expenses that popped up on the transmission rebuild. I'm about 60% done with the transmission rebuild."
Fixing a transmission means taking it apart and putting it back together with new parts so the car can shift gears properly again. It's like fixing a big, complicated machine inside your car.
A transmission rebuild involves disassembling, inspecting, and replacing worn or damaged parts within a vehicle's transmission to restore its proper function. It is a complex process that can extend the life of the transmission without needing a full replacement.
"I've rebuilt the three four drums, the four drums. I've rebuilt most of the rotating assembly."
Inside an automatic transmission, the three four drum helps the car switch between third and fourth gears by moving parts inside it. It's like a special part that helps the car change gears smoothly.
The three four drum is a component inside an automatic transmission that controls the engagement of the third and fourth gears. It houses clutches and bands that help shift the transmission smoothly between these gears.
"I've rebuilt most of the rotating assembly. And my God, what a Lovecraftian horror show that was."
The rotating assembly is all the parts inside the transmission that spin around to help the car move. Fixing these parts is important so the car can drive right.
The rotating assembly in a transmission consists of all the parts that spin or rotate, such as gears, shafts, and clutches. Rebuilding this assembly is crucial for the transmission to function correctly and transfer power efficiently.
"You wouldn't believe that in order to keep your car going down the road, it required that many O-rings, but it is. The O-rings. And I think the O-rings might be the most important thing in the whole damn thing. You pinch or twist one of them O-rings or one of them flat rings and you're done."
O-rings are little rubber rings that stop fluid from leaking inside the transmission. If they get twisted or pinched, the transmission can stop working right.
O-rings are small rubber seals used in transmissions to prevent fluid leaks and maintain hydraulic pressure. They are critical for proper transmission operation, and damage to them can cause transmission failure.
"You pinch or twist one of them O-rings or one of them flat rings and you're done. You're going to burn up a unit."
Flat rings are flat rubber or metal pieces that help stop fluid from leaking inside the transmission. They work like little seals.
Flat rings, also known as sealing rings or gaskets, are flat seals used in transmissions to prevent fluid leaks between components. Like O-rings, they are essential to maintain hydraulic pressure and proper transmission function.
"Now next I got it because I'm putting a shift kit in it. I had to modify the pump as a rebuilt pump and I had to modify the servo when I rebuilt servo."
A shift kit is a part you add to an automatic transmission to make the gear changes quicker and stronger. It helps the car feel more responsive when shifting gears.
A shift kit is an aftermarket modification for automatic transmissions that changes the transmission's hydraulic controls to improve shift firmness and speed. This can enhance performance and reduce wear on the transmission.
"I had to modify the pump as a rebuilt pump and I had to modify the servo when I rebuilt servo. And no, it's not a Corvette servo."
The pump in a transmission moves fluid around so the car can change gears. Fixing or rebuilding it means making sure it works like new again.
The transmission pump circulates transmission fluid under pressure to operate the hydraulic controls that manage gear changes. A rebuilt pump is one that has been repaired or restored to proper working condition.
"I had to modify the pump as a rebuilt pump and I had to modify the servo when I rebuilt servo. And no, it's not a Corvette servo."
The servo is a part inside the transmission that helps push parts to change gears. Fixing it helps the car shift better.
A servo in an automatic transmission is a hydraulic device that applies pressure to bands or clutches to engage or disengage gears. Rebuilding or modifying the servo can improve transmission shift quality.
"...e servo when I rebuilt servo. And no, it's not a Corvette servo. If I hear that again, I'm on the screen."
The Chevrolet Corvette is a famous fast car made in America that many people admire for how it looks and drives. It has been around for a long time and is known for being sporty and powerful. Talking about a 'servo' means someone is fixing or working on a part that helps the car work better.
The Chevrolet Corvette is an iconic American sports car known for its performance and distinctive design. It has a long history dating back to the 1950s and is often discussed in automotive circles for its engineering and cultural impact. The mention of a 'servo' likely refers to a component related to the car's braking or power steering system, highlighting technical details in a rebuild context.
"But I do have to do some work to, there's a little bit of machining and work to do on the valve body for the shift kit. And once that's done, we'll slap the whole thing together, get that bugger back in the truck."
The valve body is a part inside an automatic transmission that helps control when the car changes gears. Sometimes it needs to be adjusted or worked on to make the gear changes smoother or faster.
The valve body is a complex maze of channels and passages inside an automatic transmission that directs hydraulic fluid to control gear shifts. Modifying or machining the valve body is common when installing a shift kit to improve shift quality and transmission performance.
"We still got to swap that differential out to just got a bad differential, but got a spare. So, y'all wish me luck."
The differential is a part that helps your car's wheels turn at different speeds when you go around corners. If it is bad, it needs to be replaced so the car drives right.
The differential is a drivetrain component that allows the wheels to rotate at different speeds, especially important when turning. Swapping out a bad differential is necessary to maintain proper vehicle handling and drivetrain function.
"...Will loading. Big Will loading, got in his Honda Accord. And he lives in a, he lives in an area of Houst..."
The Honda Accord is a very common and dependable car that many people use every day. It's easy to drive, saves gas, and is comfortable for passengers. In the podcast, someone is just talking about driving this car in their neighborhood.
The Honda Accord is a popular midsize sedan known for its reliability, fuel efficiency, and comfortable ride. It is often praised for its strong resale value and practicality, making it a common choice for daily commuting. The context suggests a casual mention of the car in a personal or local setting.
"We weren't building project cars. We were changing headgasket on the old bill Cutlass Sierra."
A project car is a car that someone fixes up or changes to make it better or different, usually as a fun hobby.
A project car is a vehicle that someone buys or works on with the intention of restoring, modifying, or customizing it, often as a hobby or for resale. It typically requires significant mechanical or cosmetic work.
"We were changing headgasket on the old bill Cutlass Sierra. We weren't wrenching to have a good time."
The head gasket is a part inside the engine that keeps important fluids separate and helps the engine run properly. If it breaks, the car can have big problems.
A head gasket is a critical component that seals the engine block and cylinder head, preventing leaks of coolant or engine oil and maintaining compression. Failure can cause engine overheating and serious damage.
"...We were changing headgasket on the old bill Cutlass Sierra. We weren't wrenching to have a good time."
The Oldsmobile Cutlass Sierra is a type of car made by Oldsmobile, popular in the 1980s. It was a common family car that many people drove back then.
The Oldsmobile Cutlass Sierra was a mid-size car produced by Oldsmobile, a division of General Motors, primarily in the 1980s and early 1990s. It was known for its comfortable ride and was popular as a family car during its production years.
"And my dad had got us some Schwinn bicycles and me and him had started riding bicycles together."
Schwinn is a company that makes bicycles. Their bikes are known to be good and last a long time, so many people use them for riding around.
Schwinn is a well-known American bicycle brand famous for producing durable and affordable bikes since the early 1900s. Their bicycles have been popular for casual riding and family use.
"Dad's got our bikes on the trunk of the Cordova. You've got to take them out and put them together because we had to take them apart and fit them in that trunk."
The Chevrolet Cordova is an older car with a big trunk, which means you can fit things like bikes inside it. It was a popular family car back in the day.
The Chevrolet Cordova was a mid-1960s full-size car known for its spacious trunk and classic American styling. It was part of Chevrolet's lineup during that era, offering a large trunk space suitable for family outings and carrying items like bicycles.
"He pulls up and of course he's got a nice new Ford pickup truck, match camper, works, running boards, chrome alloy wheels, you know."
A pickup truck is a type of vehicle that has seats for people in the front and a flat open space in the back to carry things.
A pickup truck is a light-duty truck with an enclosed cab and an open cargo area with low sides and tailgate. They are popular for their versatility in carrying goods and passengers.
"He pulls up and of course he's got a nice new Ford pickup truck, match camper, works, running boards, chrome alloy wheels, you know."
Running boards are like small steps on the side of a truck that help you get in and out more easily.
Running boards are narrow steps fitted under the side doors of a vehicle, commonly trucks and SUVs, to help passengers step into the vehicle more easily.
"Pulls this bike out. Looks like a triathlon bike. It's got a little computer on it, all kind of specials."
A triathlon bike is a special kind of bike made to go fast in races where people swim, bike, and run.
A triathlon bike is a type of bicycle designed specifically for triathlon races, optimized for aerodynamics and speed, often featuring aero bars and a unique frame geometry.
"...South Bend, Indiana where the Southern Methodist Mustangs in Dallas, Texas did something that this broadca..."
The Ford Mustang is a well-known fast and cool car that many people like because it looks sporty and has a strong engine. It's been popular for a long time and is often connected to fun driving. In the podcast, they might be talking about a team or place with the same name as the car.
The Ford Mustang is a classic American muscle car known for its powerful engines and sporty styling. It has a rich history since its introduction in the 1960s and remains a symbol of performance and freedom in automotive culture. The mention likely ties into a sports or regional team reference, playing on the Mustang name.
"He grabbed the door handle steadying himself a little as the familiar rumble of Steve's old mobile overtook his auditory senses. As he turned his head, the rocket 88, long and impossibly black in the sunshine, rolled alongside him as Les Paul and Mary Ford wailed about the height of the moon on KRLD from the car speakers."
The Oldsmobile Rocket 88 is an old car famous for being one of the first fast cars with a strong engine. It helped start the trend of muscle cars that are powerful and sporty.
The Oldsmobile Rocket 88 is considered by many to be the first muscle car, introduced in the late 1940s. It featured a powerful V8 engine and was known for its performance and style, influencing American car culture.
"It's all all ready. And I think I get the Avalanche over here. I'm going to make me a little, I have ..."
The Chevrolet Avalanche is a truck that also feels like a big car inside, so it's good for carrying things and people. It has a special part that lets you make more space when you need it. In the podcast, someone is probably getting ready to use this truck for a task.
The Chevrolet Avalanche is a unique pickup truck that combines the utility of a truck with the comfort of an SUV. Produced from 2001 to 2013, it features a versatile midgate that allows the cargo area to expand into the cabin. The mention suggests someone preparing or organizing something around this vehicle.
"...They're not going to change the direction of your journey. I forgot to say, you're already worthy in my ey..."
The Dodge Journey is a type of car that is bigger than a normal car and good for families because it can carry more people and stuff. It's not the fanciest, but it gets the job done. In the podcast, they are probably using the word 'journey' to talk about a trip or experience.
The Dodge Journey is a midsize crossover SUV known for its affordability and family-friendly features. While not as refined as some competitors, it offers flexible seating and cargo options. The mention plays on the word 'journey,' likely in a metaphorical sense.
Select text to request an explanation
Are you really digging for peace?
Or is that just a lie?
Tell to help us please.
Sure that you really want real behind all the stories that go.
Still remembers fire.
Press remembers rain.
Welcome to the Wrecking Yard.
I'm Jerry Wayne Lumber.
Y'all are presumably still y'all.
All welcome here in the Church of Internal Combustion.
We just asked that you show up with an open heart.
It's two o'clock on Sunday y'all.
Damn.
I thought I was running it tight last week.
I'm running it real damn tight this week.
We had had, I'll let me use this some of you know,
we had a gully washer and a half come through last night.
It was a big old pretty lightning storm starting about 6pm in the evening on Saturday.
And our power and Wi-Fi has been in and out all night.
Just barely working if it ever worked.
And then this morning was out all morning.
Just got everything back.
Trying to get this done and get it out and take it out.
We'll see if I make it.
I don't know man.
We're crapshoot today.
If I'm in the chat with you, we made it.
My goodness.
Lots of talk about this week.
Lots of talk about and short time to get through it all.
On a side note, I don't know how many of you guys are interested in this,
but we've talked about before people, you know,
unfortunately when I post my podcast on other things,
they have to put ads on it.
That's the only way I get paid for my time at all.
Because I'm not really doing any sponsors right now.
It was just kind of a pain in the ass.
I had some good sponsors, but it's just a lot to ask of somebody.
But I hate the ads too.
I know they put them in bad places.
I know they interrupt shit all the time.
So for those of you that are interested and I don't expect, you know what I mean?
Like it's not me hitting you up for money or whatever.
But I'm going to be moving the audio and the video podcast to Patreon.
It's going to be behind the pay wall.
I think it's going to be like three or four bucks a month.
I'm not going to make it super expensive.
And I'm going to have a bunch of other special content over there for people that follow that.
It will still also be on YouTube, but there's going to be ads on it.
But when I move everything to Patreon, there's not going to be ads over there.
So if you pay the little three or four bucks a month, whatever the shit it is,
then you can watch everything without any ads.
And we're going to do all kinds of stuff.
We're combining all the trucker straw and just putting them over there.
Just finally kind of, I've been trying to figure out the video hosting side of it.
So there is some expense with that.
So that's why I got to make sure I charge up.
I got Rob Peter pay Paul.
Sorry, you're Peter.
Or you can just watch it for free on YouTube.
Just, you know, you kind of try to mind the ads last.
That's how I'm saying.
A whole boy's got to eat.
I know I ain't starving, but I need a little chicken fried steak every once in a while.
That's all I'm saying.
So that's how I'm going to go about it.
Some people suggest that I thought it was a good idea.
So if those of you that want to do that, it'll be available.
I'll let you know as soon as that releases.
And, you know, those of you guys that don't mind the ads, it'll still be here for free for you.
Ain't taking anything away from me, but I'm just offering an alternative.
Because I know some people just hate the ads.
And God, if YouTube doesn't put the ads in the worst places, they drive me crazy with it too.
I wish I had control over that.
Been a good week in the wrecking yard aside from the storm and everything last night.
I filmed my very first TV commercial this week.
I've done some like industrial films, like safety films.
And, you know, I did a little maid for YouTube TV show, whatever you want to call it.
But this was my first paid ad as a paid actor and wasn't paid a lot.
Also didn't do a lot.
I had to really stretch, you know what I mean?
I had to break out of my parameters so that I could play a plumber who has one line
and hand somebody an invoice and says, this is going to hurt a little bit.
And for whatever reason inexplicably, they had the plumber wearing overalls and a wife beater.
I never seen a plumber and a wife beater in my life.
So that was a new one.
The guy kept going, well, you worked in construction, you worked in the trades in Texas for a long time.
What did you wear?
And I was like, the same thing everybody else in the trades in Texas wears.
Cargo shorts, usually camouflaged for most of the year and some kind of breathable t-shirt
because it's 9,000 degrees here most of the year.
Pair of boots, socks, you're good to go to work.
If you're doing insulation or something, you might want the long sleeves.
I always like long sleeves when I'm landscaping.
A Mexican buddy of mine turned me on to that and I realized that that is a much more effective way
to do yard work with long sleeves because it actually keeps you cooler, which is mind-blowing to me, but it works.
So when you see them old men get out there working their yard and they got that long button-up shirt
and long sleeves and the slacks and it keeps them cooler.
So I keep that kerchief around the neck everything.
It seems ridiculous that adding clothes could keep you cooler, but it like traps the sweat against your body somehow.
I don't know the science behind it. I'm no scientist.
But it was a super cool experience.
Every time I get to go on set, it's so interesting because I watch the camera guy, the director of cinematography.
I watch everybody, how the director moves, how the other actors behave, how the real actors do this for a living.
Because I'm at ground floor there. I'm learning.
I learn about how they set up the cameras. I look at the things they use to build out their cameras.
I ask them all kind of lighting questions.
I talk to the sound guy. I bug and piss out of him.
I try to learn as much as I can from everybody that I talk to.
It's always a remarkable learning experience for me.
And I was working with my good buddies, Rob Nielsen and Adam Taylor, who I've done stuff with them for a long time.
I really trust them and I just enjoy hanging out with them, good people.
And Joe Grisofi was in the commercial too.
And he's an actor from here in Houston and a director himself.
He's got a horror movie he's trying to put out right now called Slugger.
And I'm hoping if I kiss his ass enough, I'll get me a bit part in Slugger.
I could play a deranged old redneck with a baseball bat.
I think I could pull that off. I think that's within my range.
So it was cool. I had a good time doing that.
And I made a little money for the jukebox, which is always helpful.
Pop always say, you get a little money, somebody give me a little money.
Boy, that'll make the jukebox play right there.
I got a little money for the jukebox this week and it came just the right time.
Took care of some things.
There were some extra expenses that popped up on the transmission rebuild.
I'm about 60% done with the transmission rebuild.
I've rebuilt the three four drums, the four drums.
I've rebuilt most of the rotating assembly.
And my God, what a Lovecraftian horror show that was.
You wouldn't believe that in order to keep your car going down the road,
it required that many O-rings, but it is.
The O-rings.
And I think the O-rings might be the most important thing in the whole damn thing.
You pinch or twist one of them O-rings or one of them flat rings and you're done.
You're going to burn up a unit.
So I have a lot of anxiety over it because it's my first time.
I don't screw nothing up.
David's got me through it.
Like I said, we got most of the rotating assembly is all built and ready to go in the unit.
Now next I got it because I'm putting a shift kit in it.
I had to modify the pump as a rebuilt pump and I had to modify the servo when I rebuilt servo.
And no, it's not a Corvette servo.
If I hear that again, I'm on the screen.
It's just regular servo come out of a light duty truck, half ton truck.
So it's not the 95 93.
It's the five 93 year order of the shit, the 55 55.
But I do have to do some work to, there's a little bit of machining and work to do on the valve body for the shift kit.
And once that's done, we'll slap the whole thing together, get that bugger back in the truck.
So I'm looking forward to having a vehicle again because this one car bullshit gets old pretty quick.
And we've done it a lot of times before, you know, as I buy and sell things, but I might have held off on selling the Mazda if I knew the transmission was going to take this long.
But we're in it now.
We're almost done with it.
I was hoping, hoping to have it done this.
I'm going to go work on it tomorrow.
And, you know, hopefully you guys get a chance to get it in the truck.
We still got to swap that differential out to just got a bad differential, but got a spare.
So, y'all wish me luck.
That all goes well this week because I do have to go to Fredericksburg, Texas at the end of the week for a show in Fredericksburg with my good buddy Barry Lamineck.
After the Rockbox Theater Fredericksburg, Texas.
I've been there one time before me and Bill went there on the Christmas tour this past year.
It's a nice little theater.
Fredericksburg, I don't, I don't know how that town is going to be for selling tickets.
I did some shows out in that area two or three years ago and sold them out, but I haven't been back out there in a couple of years.
So we'll, we'll see how it goes.
Austin turned out to be a fantastic evening.
I went to Austin.
Damn, I'm losing track of my days.
Friday night, me and Big Will loading.
Y'all have heard plenty of stories about Big Will loading.
Big Will loading, got in his Honda Accord.
And he lives in a, he lives in an area of Houston called Montrose and there's a lot of construction over there.
And I think construction boys got his tires because they're pretty good looking tires.
Those people on the internet, I showed a picture of us talking all kinds of shit about those tires were pretty good shape.
There's no reason to suspect anything was wrong with them.
Will tries to do a pretty good job taking care of his car and keeping it in good shoes.
And, but we left my house and blew the right rear tire out almost immediately.
I mean, just getting on the hardy blew it out.
Went to one local little tire shops.
They had his back on the road in 10 minutes with another tire.
We checked out the other tires, everything looked okay.
Boog it our way to Austin.
I didn't have a sell out in Austin, but I did have about 60 people and it turned out to be a pretty damn good turnout.
The Vulcans kind of a small room and Will got up there and wrenched that crowd loose from the day.
Got them warmed up for me and I went up there did what I did.
We had a hell of a good show.
I had to meet so many cool people afterwards.
One lady, this lady Cynthia, she even brought me, she made a little crocheted mushrooms full of catnip for Little Miss Ophelia.
And another lady brought people bring me stuff for Ophelia all the time.
They don't bring me shit for me, but they bring stuff for that damn cat.
I think that was their third time coming to a show and they sound like they had a great time.
It was pretty, Cody Hamblin came in.
Just some cool people man, some cool people, some wrecking yard people came out.
That's always my favorite when I get to meet wrecking yard people.
I was so excited to meet you guys and then me and Will turned around and got back in that gum Honda and beat feet our way back to Houston in the dark of the night.
I don't know that I like driving across Texas with anyone better than I like doing it with Will Logan.
Me and that dude just have a groove, we groove, we just have a way about us, right?
And it, you know, fired up a little Jay.
I sat in the passenger seat burning Jay, we listened to Sturgill Simpson.
Sturgill Simpson, I don't know if you've been following all the drama with Sturgill Simpson, but you know he changed his name to Johnny Blue Skies and started recording under a pseudonym.
And the first Johnny Blue Skies record I liked, it was kind of dark and sad, but I liked it.
I liked that kind of shit.
But then he announced he was putting out a disco album and I was like, well, and this dude will just shatter genres anyway.
I've always been a fan of him.
But then he says, you're not going to release it on digital.
It's only going to be on physical medium CDs, vinyls, that sort of thing, pre-sales went through the roof.
He did the Taylor Swift thing selling different color vinyls to people.
And then he come out and said, man, I'm going to play the whole album on Instagram live.
And then when everybody showed up, it was just a speaker playing Rick Astley.
He Rick rolled everybody.
And then he came out that night and released the whole album on YouTube.
That's the only way you can listen to it digitally right now is listen to it on YouTube.
So we hooked up my phone and we played that whole album and started to finish.
I've already listened to it like three or four times, to be honest with you.
It's one of the best albums I've heard in years.
It's just fantastic.
You will groove and shake your legs will just move while you're listening to it.
It's just good ass shake.
He may call it disco.
Me, it's just good ass shaking kind of country rock and roll.
Man, it kind of reminds me of the late 70s, early 80s period of country where nobody knew what they were doing again.
And he's got live and just big brass playing to it.
But I love horns.
I don't know anything about music.
I can't tell you what they do in the music, but I like when horns come in a loud and triumph it and take over the song.
But I also love when the brass sits there right under the sound of everything else just filling the extra sound.
And boy, he just does it tremendously on this album.
So we jammed that out with Jim Paul Cawthon's last album out.
Will hadn't heard it yet and smoked our way across Texas back to Houston.
And literally eight minutes from my house on 610 blew the right front tire out 80-something miles an hour.
Scared the piss out of us.
And you all try to change the tire on 610 in the dark.
That's just a fool's errand.
That's a good way for a young man to end up dead or a middle-aged man to end up dead.
It's just a bad idea.
Luckily, we were right at the exit.
They pull off, get us in the shell parking lot.
I mean, Will did our NASCAR thing, swapped him tires out with a spare.
Thank God he had a spare.
Got back in the house.
It's good.
Just a good damn time, man.
Good trip.
It's after the tire blew out.
But I'm looking forward to Fredericksburg this week.
You know, it feels good to be off my break and throw in punches again.
It's just something about being on stage.
I love this.
I love so many things.
I love writing.
But being on that damn stage, it's like something takes over.
And it's not, you know, I spent most of my life feeling like an outsider, like an observer, like somebody who doesn't belong.
But when I grab that microphone, I feel like I belong.
I feel like that's my room.
I feel like that's where I belong.
And nothing, just, there's not many things in life that give me that feeling.
That give me that feeling.
I was thinking about somewhere, I was thinking about this episode all week and write little notes down.
And I'm not here to give you a sob story, but I'm going to tell you some stories about me that you might know a little bit about, but you don't know 100%.
But I kind of want to explain, I feel, I know not everybody's going to get the point, but I feel like you guys are deeper and we're better connected than that.
And I kind of want to explain some stuff to you guys about like the astrology videos and why I do them and what the point of all that is.
Because some people might just see it as silliness, but there's a deeper point to it.
And I promise you that once I get done explaining it, you'll understand a little better.
You might watch them a little differently.
You know, I told you my parents didn't have money when I was growing up.
I'm not saying we're impoverished. I'm not out to, I don't want to try to outpour anybody.
I don't know why that turns into a competition when you tell.
I remember some guy came in and commented something after some of the original episodes of The Wrecking Yard.
And he was like, you call yourself poor, but a Jim Waffler's house isn't poorer.
And I'm like, dude, I'm not trying to have a competition with you.
I'm sorry, you grew up poorer than me, but we grew up with no money.
So whatever you want to call that, we don't have to call them impoverished or any words that trigger you
and make you think I'm competing with you for how poor we were growing up.
Let me say we didn't have money. We were have-nots.
We had food, but it wasn't great food. It was the food we could afford, but we were have-nots.
Luckily, in East Texas, everybody was have-nots, except for just a few people were the haves.
So that was a different situation growing up.
When you're have-nots with other have-nots, it doesn't matter as much because nobody's got anything to talk about with it.
But when we first moved to Houston when I was a kid, you know, 10, 11 years old, whatever it was,
then it became apparent I was a have-not. I didn't know before.
I got hand-me-down clothes from my older cousins. I didn't think nothing about it.
I was just excited to get some new clothes.
I didn't know that, you know, other people had new clothes from the store and that's-
you know what I mean? Like it was just- and my clothes came from Kmart when I got new clothes.
My shoes came from Kmart when I got- that's what my parents could scrap together and get.
They were living paycheck to paycheck and sometimes the paychecks didn't come.
My dad was doing everything he could to support us.
That's why we moved to Houston so he could pursue a job that disappeared in Hillgold.
That job disappeared.
You know, people don't realize the oil field crash was bad for everybody in 87, but it started in 82.
Okay, the OPEC and all that.
That all started in 82 and money was getting scarce long before 87 and jobs were getting disappeared long before 87.
We got to Houston and I went to the Houston school and I started experiencing things I'd never experienced before.
I remember- I don't remember the kid's name. I think it was Andy, but he was kind of a cool kid.
I was kind of dorky. I didn't really fit in.
And I was humming the Kmart song kind of under my breath before class started one day.
And he'd come over there and he looked me up and down. He looked at my shoes and my corduroy pants.
And he's like, your clothes look like they come from Kmart. Is that why you sing the song?
And I just remember all the other kids in class laughing at me. I remember how that felt.
I remember feeling my face get warm to the touch. I remember wanting to hit.
I remember being angry.
And that was just the beginning.
Because once I found out I was sensitive about it, then they didn't let up.
Then the jokes were there all the time. All the time about how broke I was.
I didn't have the cool haircut. I didn't have the cool clothes. I didn't have the cool shoes, whatever.
I never even thought about having that stuff before, but it was a parent that I did not have.
I had so much trouble fitting in that the teachers got concerned about me and I was getting bullied.
I was a little small runt of a little shit. I was getting bullied left and right.
I tell you all, I'm my only friend in that little apartment complex.
The apartment complex we lived in was Have-Nots.
My only little friend there was Melissa at that time. She lived in that apartment complex with a little girl and we hung out.
She was the only friend I had in Houston.
I was getting in trouble at school and things weren't going well.
And school counselors, of course, they were kind of New Age being in Houston and stuff.
They'd get together with my parents and my parents keep getting called to school, which usually gets my ass whooped.
Because that was my dad. My dad comes from generation people that when things weren't working right, you hit them.
TV, cars, kids. That's how you fix things. You hit them.
And, or you yelled at them.
My parents sent me to the school to convince my parents had me go talk to a therapist.
Of course, my dad's lived by. You know how much it's going to cost?
Everything back then was how much it's going to cost.
Being a dad now, I understand it, but I don't voice it to my kids.
It's not their duty to be worried about that.
Boy, he was living. Oh, it's going to cost money.
And I go to this therapist and she asked me all about, you know, what's wrong.
And I don't know. I'm a kid. All I know it's wrong is I'm not home. I'm not where I'm supposed to be.
I want to be back and kill. I want to be around Granny and Papa. I want to be around my cousins.
I want to be around the other have nots where everybody felt the same.
I want to be back where I felt like I belonged to some extent.
I know I don't belong in this place.
I get down with the therapist and then my parents go in there and talk to the therapist.
We're going to go home to our apartment.
And I'll do dinner. My dad's just seen. He's just red in the face, pissed off.
You just tell the old man's about to blow a gasket.
And my mom sent me to my room.
So I heard my dad could talk and I went in there at the time I was into whittling bossa wood.
I was trying to make bossa wood airplanes and I didn't know what I was doing.
I was mostly just whittling bossa wood waiting up and I was sitting there with my little pocket knife.
My dad come through the door and about took it off the hinges and he just started railing.
Just yelling. I remember I was holding that piece of bossa wood and I started crying at some point.
He was just yelling at my face.
You thought you were going to tell that therapist that all you want to do is go home
and somebody were just going to pack our shit up and move back home.
That's never going to happen. We're never going to scream in my face.
Blood pounding in his face screaming and hollering in my face about how we were never going back home
and I need to stop being a little pussy and get that shit out of my system
and he slapped that bossa wood out of my hand because I started crying.
I don't want to see you crying. I don't want to see you know just that shit.
Just all up in my face screaming and hollering at a 10 year old.
Like a man fucking possessed.
Because of his own insecurities and his own freaking flaws that he couldn't figure out
or be adult enough to deal with.
That's why I say all the things I say about pain.
I'm not carrying a grudge. I just want to instill how serious it was so that you understand.
You're 10 years old and there's an adult screaming in your face like that.
You don't know what to do. It's fight or flight and all I had was flight.
And of course shit doesn't get better at school.
It just continues. I just learned how to hide better and how to put on different masks to get away from.
That's the through line about truck astrology. That's the through line about all this shit.
I have a hard time understanding people that make their whole identity about something they can buy.
Their whole personality wrapped around something they can buy.
That's why I make fun of the sunglasses. That's why I make fun of the truck brands.
That's why I make fun of all of it.
Because there's no truck you're going to buy that's going to change your life.
There's no sunglasses you're going to own that's going to change your life.
It's all a facade. The only thing that changes your life is your perspective of it.
If you'll notice I'm real, I do it subtly, but I generally champion the broke guy.
I like the ugly patch colored trucks. I like the guys who are just barely keeping it together.
I make jokes about them. I love them. I'm honest enough to talk about them honestly.
Because I'm one of them. That's why I make fun of the brim of boots.
But I say we're all just a step away from wearing them.
Because we shouldn't be marketing so crazy in the way it wraps people's brains up there.
They're not selling you sunglasses. They're selling you lifestyle. They're selling you a freaking lie.
All that shit. I like to have nice things as much as a nice person.
I'm not saying if you want a certain truck because you just like that truck you're a bad person.
I'm not saying that. But you know what I'm talking about.
You know the type of people I'm talking about who feel like they're better than others
if they got a certain brand or something. That's who I'm poking fun at.
That's the whole mentality is what I'm poking fun at.
Because it's the same person. The only thing that determines who you are as your character.
The shit you own does not. You may feel superior while you're driving down the road.
But you ain't. It's only through perspective that you're allowed to feel that way.
It's only because marketing has sold you this bullshit that you feel that way.
I was watching an ad on TV the other night and marketing is gross for me.
It's a necessary evil. You got to have it to sell shit.
But I have to use marketing. I try to be sincere about it when I do it.
And I try to be open about it. Yeah, I'm trying to sell you tickets to come see me at a show.
That's how I make my living. But I also try to give you your money's worth.
I'm not selling you a lie. I'm not telling you it's going to be the greatest show you've ever seen.
It might not be. But you're going to see a good show.
I was watching an ad the other night and it was Don Dishwashing Liquid.
It came on TV.
And it had these little cartoon ducks running around on a sink.
Talking about how great Don Dishwashing Liquid is.
And it kind of grossed me out, man.
Because if you understand why ducks are associated with Don,
and I think probably most of you do if you really think about it,
Don Dishsoap became famous for cleaning oily wildlife.
Particularly ducks and other seabirds, primarily after the Exxon Valdez oil spill.
And it was 89.
Remember when they were on TV, the wildlife rescuers cleaning the oil soap birds in Alaska
and images and footage of volunteers gently washing birds with Don spread wide
and stuck in the public consciousness.
Don had been used for wildlife cleaning even before that.
Like all the way the international bird rescue had decided it worked good in the early 70s
because we were always spilling oil in our water by that point.
But the Exxon Valdez disaster was like the real turnip.
That was the one that was televised, right?
Public awareness, proctor and gamble.
The people that make Don Dishwashing soap leaned into it.
Eventually making wildlife rescue a core part of Don's brand identity.
So much now that they got cartoon ducks in the damn commercial.
If you really think about it, it's just, it's three kinds of effed up, right?
Because proctor and gamble's petrochemical dependencies are through the roof.
They're deeply reliant on petrochemicals across most of their major product categories.
The irony with Don Dishwashing liquid is pretty damn striking.
The soap is itself largely made from petroleum derived ingredients.
The damn surfactants and sodium lorosulfate and a bunch of other words I can't say all petroleum derived.
They're entire Don, head and shoulders, panting, galette shaving products, plastics and packaging to sell those products and transport them.
Synthetic fragrances are all synthesized from petroleum derived aromatic compounds.
So the loop is almost poetic in its absurdity, right?
Petroleum industry extracts oil.
Petroleum industry spills oil and kills a whole shit ton of wildlife.
And then they use a soap made from petroleum to clean the ducks.
And then they market selling the soap with cartoon ducks that they endangered in the first place.
As a result, we buy more Don and demand for petroleum derived surfactants and all them other words I can't say continues, increases.
It's a freaking masterclass in what they call cause washing, where a brand associates itself with solving a problem that its own supply chain helps perpetuate.
The duck becomes a feel good symbol that actually obscures the real picture rather than illuminating.
I mean, to be fair to Project Gamble, they didn't cause the Exxon Valdez spill.
And the wildlife rescue work genuinely helpful in the moment.
I mean, it's almost funny, but it's actually kind of bleak.
When I saw the commercial and I really thought about it grossed me out and I went to do some research like how many of these birds do they even save?
And honestly, they only treated about 10% to 30% of the wildlife that got by the spill.
The vast majority of affected wildlife from that oil spill was never recovered at all.
Estimates just somewhere between 250,000 and 500,000 seabirds died along with thousands of otter seals and other animals.
Most sank or washed shore in places too remote to reach.
So the birds that got the famous Don treatment on TV were just a small fraction of total casualties and they were just essentially the lucky ones who died photogenically close enough to help.
The image that the duck she saw got washed on TV maybe made up one or two percent of the actual damage and about half of those didn't survive either.
The rescue was real.
The care from volunteers was genuine.
I'm not knocking those people at all.
But the story told about it was curated to be hopeful and redemptive in a way that the full reality simply ain't.
And cause washing, it's not singular insulated to this industry.
It's all over the place.
Just like every year around October, right?
What do you see?
All these products on the shelf with a little pink ribbon.
They care about breast cancer.
Pink ribbon.
We're fighting breast cancer.
They pay for that ribbon.
What do they do?
They donate a fraction of a cent per purchase?
Hell, a bunch of companies that ran pink ribbon campaigns have manufactured products containing chemicals linked to breast cancer.
But the cause and that little pink ribbon on their damn bottle creates a little fake halo that the product itself does not deserve.
There's a fact that H&M and Zara have both launched conscious or sustainable clothing lines.
While their core business model depends on overproduction, cheap labor, disposable clothing that ends up in landfills.
The sustainable line is real, but it's only about 2% of their inventory.
Budweiser is one of the worst.
Budweiser and all their veteran support.
I mean, they have run extensive campaigns on our military veterans while lobbying against policies that would benefit military veterans and most of the working class.
It's just gross, man.
It's just gross.
And it's the same shit with everybody's trying to sell you something.
Everything you see on TV trying to sell you something.
Everything on there.
It's just they're not all nefarious.
They're not all evil.
I'm not saying I'm not saying all marketing is nefarious and evil, but it did come from TV was literally invented to sell you shit.
And to make those as a result of that, then there becomes a secondary line of, well, if you can't afford it, if you can't afford to buy these kind of clothes, you can't afford to buy this kind of truck, then you're not successful.
You're not doing well.
You're failing America.
You're not, you're not being what you're supposed to be.
That stuff went on the whole time I was through school because we were broke most of the time I was in school.
Now, after I graduated everything, my dad's career took off and he really, you know, started doing well for himself.
But while I was in school, they were not.
They were hoping to make rent every month.
They were hoping to keep a car running so dad could get back and forth to work.
That's why we were out in the driveway, wrenching on cars every night was because we wanted to.
It's fun.
We weren't building project cars.
We were changing headgasket on the old bill Cutlass Sierra.
We weren't wrenching to have a good time.
Remember I was telling you about my pop ball lawn mower and how he didn't hunt for trophies.
He didn't fish for trophies.
He hunted and fish to eat.
That's, that's how we did cars.
We didn't work on cars to build project cars and build hot rods and to build cool stuff.
We worked on cars so we could eat.
Dad worked on cars on the weekend, make a little extra scratch.
He worked on our cars and I worked on them with him so that, you know, mom could get us to school and he could get to work.
We did it so we could eat.
There was this period of time.
My little sister was in Girl Scouts.
One of the girls in her Girl Scout troop came from kind of an affluent family that lived a little ways away from him.
They had money, a big old three story house.
They weren't rich, but they had, they were habs.
He was an engineer or something, had a real good high paying job.
Mom had her own business or something.
There was money coming in and out of the house.
Kids wore new clothes and you know, all the good shit.
I remember they were doing a Girl Scout thing down at Brazos Bend State Park.
And my dad would always go to help my mom with the Girl Scout troop and I'd get drug along too.
And my dad had got us some Schwinn bicycles and me and him had started riding bicycles together.
But not like people ride bicycles, you know, not with all the gear and money for that shit.
We rode bicycles on our blue jeans and our tennis shoes that we mowed the lawn in.
An old trucker cap and a t-shirt.
No fancy gloves or fancy clothes or any of that shit, you know.
I can't remember, I think their last name was Stokely.
I can't remember the dad's name, but me and my dad were kind of off in the background at some event,
talking about our bicycles.
He's like, oh, I ride, I cycle too.
Maybe we go to do that thing at Brazos Bend.
I'll bring my bike.
You guys bring your bikes.
We'll go for a ride.
Dad didn't have many friends.
You know, he worked all the time.
I think my dad wanted to fit in as bad as I did and I think he had just as much trouble with it.
He just wouldn't admit it.
And I remember we'd go out there at Brazos Bend.
We set up all the shit for the girls so they can do their little whatever the hell they're doing at Brazos Bend Girl Scout event.
Dad's got our bikes on the trunk of the Cordova.
You've got to take them out and put them together because we had to take them apart and fit them in that trunk.
It's a big trunk though.
We're getting our Schwinn bicycles together.
I think that guy's name was Don.
He pulls up and of course he's got a nice new Ford pickup truck, match camper, works, running boards, chrome alloy wheels, you know.
Finding shit you could get in 89 and 90, whatever it was.
Probably like 91, 92.
Pulls this bike out.
Looks like a triathlon bike.
It's got a little computer on it, all kind of specials.
I mean, it's probably, in 1990, it's probably $2,000 worth of bicycle, which was just something that we couldn't even afford.
We couldn't even fathom.
He's got the special helmet, the arrow helmet and the gloves and the riding gear.
I know my dad felt embarrassed.
I felt embarrassed, right?
It felt like we showed up something we didn't know what we were showing up to.
You can't help that.
Maybe some people don't feel that way and good for them.
It took me a long time to not feel that way, but I did not feel that way at 14, 13 years old.
It just felt like the cool kids at school were showing out again and I was still the broke kid that couldn't afford to play.
And we take off riding, of course, he hits third gear and just disappears and leaves us.
I mean, my dad go out and ride about four or five miles, but I can tell my dad's, the joy is gone from it, right?
We both feel like two hicks on bicycles and our blue jeans.
We ride us four or five miles, come back, help mom with the girls.
Of course, Don shows up 30 minutes later.
He's on a road 20 miles on that super bike.
This is not Don's fault. That's the life Don knew.
I'm not saying Don was a bad person.
I'm not trying to point any devilish shit at him.
That's the life he knew.
He was a man of means. He could afford those things.
He didn't know we weren't.
Maybe he did and he just didn't care.
Maybe it didn't matter to him.
Maybe he was so far removed from it, he couldn't begin to understand it.
That's a possibility too.
I don't know. I can't speak for Don, but I'm not saying Don was a bad guy.
I'm just saying that in that moment, I felt less than.
And when you spend a lot of your life feeling less than,
it becomes a pattern that you recognize immediately.
I think I probably told y'all a little bit about this story.
I don't know the depth of it, but...
When I was in middle school, boy,
all the cool kids were wearing these pants called Z-Caverichis.
And they were these baggy jeans.
There was Z-Caverichis and another brand.
Jerbo, I think.
Jerbo'd some shit like that.
And they were kind of these baggy blue jeans.
And they were the hip most popular thing and all the cool kids wore them.
My parents, they were like 60 bucks a pair.
My parents didn't have $60 a pair of jean money.
Okay, I wore Lees.
Well, that little, that Stokely girl,
she had an older brother who was a little bit older than me.
And he had a bunch of Jerbo and Z-Caverichis jeans
that he'd grown out of his mom got him some new ones.
His mom gave them to my mom for me.
His old ones.
Boy, I thought I was cool.
I put them Z-Caverichis.
They were white.
I put them Z-Caverichis on.
It's cool black shirt he gave me.
And boy, I felt cool walking in that school.
Well, a couple of people know.
Boy, look at them Z-Caverichis.
You know what I mean?
Like, you know how it is.
Like all of a sudden people were talking to me that didn't talk to me.
Like, oh man, those bad ass pants.
Oh, you look good today.
I felt cool.
It's silly.
It's stupid, but I felt like I belonged.
That first hour or so of school where I was getting all that attention,
I felt like, oh, I'm one of y'all now.
I'm like one of the cool kids and I'm in the cool kid.
I still felt like a dork inside,
but outwardly I felt better.
I felt like I belonged to something.
I felt like I was a...
I got the right pants.
I got the right shirt.
Not wearing my K-Mart clothes.
It's so damn trivial.
Let something make you feel that way.
Then after a second period,
I was walking to my next class
and here comes that boy that I got them pants from.
And he makes some crack.
I just bear he points at me because, hey, that's my old pants.
And it just felt like everybody in that hallway was laughing at me all of a sudden.
And I just wanted to disappear and run away.
I don't think he was doing it to be mean.
I think he was just trying to be...
I'm not saying anything bad about that, dude.
I don't think he was trying to be mean or cruel.
Sometimes the cruelty is in the indifference,
in the not knowing your situation.
He was just getting a laugh from his buddies.
But his buddies were everybody.
He was a cool kid.
Had the right clothes.
Parents drove the right car.
It's the same through line in all of it.
It's the same through line that Don Dishwasher and Liquid's doing.
It's the same through line that marketing does.
They give you the feeling, they offer you the feeling,
but they retain the power.
They don't give you the power.
It's the same trick my neighbor did,
you know, that kid did me in the hallway.
Because you think, you think if you got the right,
you think you're going to get let in if you got the right things.
If you own the right things, you're going to get let in in the club.
But you're not.
You're not.
And that's okay.
I found out eventually that it wasn't a club I wanted to be a part of.
That's the through line behind the truck astrology and all that stuff,
is I'm simply making fun of this brand loyalty bullshit.
There's never been a time in our history
where folks have clamored more
to pay people for the right to sell their shit.
People, people break their neck to buy high dollar brands.
So everybody else know they got that the cost of sunglasses
and the Oliver people's sunglasses.
It doesn't matter.
They're all made by the same damn company.
That's why I make fun of their shit.
And I suspect most of you already know that,
but if you hadn't figured out by now, that's the explanation behind it.
That's what it's about.
It's a kid that grew up without
that finally realized how silly it was.
And I might not have realized it if I'd been a half.
I bet I wouldn't.
I think growing up the way I did is the reason I can see it.
And I love you guys.
Sorry that got heavy.
Not sorry it got heavy.
Sometimes we need heavy.
So let's let's take a break from that right now.
Let's wrap that up for right now.
And let's uh...
Let's return to the Wally Bottoms Texas.
The diesel from the big GM bus
droned along the dark highway through the flats of Indiana.
The lights from other cars on the road
catching the corrugated steel and illuminating it
giving meaning to the nickname Silver Side.
Small Zenith portable radio crackled on the overhead rack above the third row.
It's dial glowing amber in the dark bus.
Someone having found a Chicago sports program
cutting through the static.
The voice of the announcer bled through the noise of the engine
thin and distant like a transmission from another world.
And we'd be remiss here on WJN tonight
if we didn't take a moment to talk about
what happened this afternoon down in South Bend, Indiana
where the Southern Methodist Mustangs in Dallas, Texas
did something that this broadcaster is still having some difficulty believing.
Fred Beners, and you're going to want to remember that name folks
completed 22 passes for 336 yards
against a Notre Dame defense that came in today
believing this was going to be a pleasant Saturday afternoon in Northern Indiana.
The final score, 27 to 20
and somewhere on a bus headed back to Dallas, Texas tonight
there are some very happy young men from the Southwest Conference.
Someone towards the front of the bus
led out a long slow holler and a few others answered it
then the bus went quiet again.
Just the diesel and the dark and amber glow of that little radio.
Steve retched back over the seat and handed Tom a couple of benes.
How's the shoulder my man?
He grunted as he pulled his flask loose from his duffel bag.
He took a swig and swallowed his own pills
before turning back to Tom with the flask.
Something to wash him down with.
Tom grinned through the pain and the dark as he took the small metal flask.
He tossed the pills back before putting it to his lips
and feeling the whiskey burn down the lining of his throat like a steam engine.
Shoulders wrecked. He half croaked.
Steve laughed.
His voice was a little nasally and it came out in his genuine laugh.
My man, you were a wrecking ball out there tonight.
I'm surprised the damn thing is still on.
Tom chuckled and said nothing.
Stared through the fog bus windows out to the nothingness of Indiana.
When the benes came on everything felt bright, lighter.
Hell, even his shoulder felt better.
Everyone got a little louder.
The accomplishments of the game became more mythical as the bus rolled through the night
and everyone's legend got a little longer.
Tom and Steve have been friends since freshman year and played together all four years.
The Levens had enough money to get Tom out of Diwali Bottoms and on to SMU
but they didn't have bucks like Steve's family.
His dad was a Cibelo and it seemed like everyone in Dallas moved him.
Steve always had money pills.
He was a decently tough fullback but nowhere near as talented as Tom on the field.
His dad had enough money and influence to keep him on the team though.
The benes had worn off by the time they got south of Springfield.
Steve's flask empty, conversation quiet and flat again.
Sleep came for the victorious young men in those late hours as the silver side bus pierced through the night.
The morning sun danced across Tom's closed eyes as the bus rumbled into Dallas the next morning.
He fought being awakened by tilting his head into the seat until they lurched to a stop in the parking lot near the field house.
By the time he had collected his gear and stood up, Steve and most of the other linemen were already headed to their cars.
The stiffness from being on that bus for the night threatened to keep him immobile as he carried his bag towards his car.
The 49 custom Ford had been a gift from the old man when he made the team.
The maroon paint gleaned under the hot Dallas sun making him squint just a little.
Everything in Dallas was shiny this morning except for Tom.
The pills are great til they ain't and the next morning everything just feels gray.
He grabbed the door handle steadying himself a little as the familiar rumble of Steve's old mobile overtook his auditory senses.
As he turned his head, the rocket 88, long and impossibly black in the sunshine, rolled alongside him as Les Paul and Mary Ford wailed about the height of the moon on KRLD from the car speakers.
Steve turned the knob down, leaned his head out towards Tom.
Go get your rest my man. Tonight we're going to be received like we deserve.
My dad got us a reservation at Campissi's and then we'll head to Sipango for some honeys.
Tom laughed as he opened his door. Don't you ever get enough?
Tom was no prude but he could even think about girls with that monochromatic landscape playing in his head at the moment.
Steve wretched out and popped Tom on the hip as he was getting into the Ford.
Enough! I'll have enough when I'm dead daddy. There may not be enough beddies on Greenville for the two of us.
We didn't beat Notre Dame so the hometown honeys could shake our hands.
He grinned as he said it before mashing the gas pedal leaving Tom questioning his own choices as the tires from the Oaseville left their own pound of flesh on the steaming concrete parking lot.
The ice in the glass had given up by the time Tom reached for the phone.
He'd been sitting with the number on the notepad in front of him long enough for the bourbon to quit being cold and start just being brown.
He picked up the receiver and dialed.
Three rings before a voice answered that he didn't recognize.
Smooth, unhurried.
Good evening, Savello properties.
Tom cleared his throat. This is Tom Levins calling for Steve.
Steve Savello.
A pause just long enough.
Mr. Savello will return your call tomorrow Mr. Levins. Have a good evening.
The line clicked.
Tom set the receiver down and looked at the notepad.
Outside the window the east Texas dark had settled in completely over the equipment yard.
Rose a vital machinery sitting in the dark like broke promises.
He freshened his drink.
Steve still sounded the same after 30 years when he called back the next morning.
They'd rehashed a few fun evenings before he told Tom to come see him at his office and Preston Center.
The office was impressive. Good carpet, real art on the walls.
Steve's assistant had led Tom in and had him wait alongside him in the hardboard leather chairs.
He hadn't offered his name but seemed to know Tom already offering no pleasantries just silence as he sat upright in his own chair facing straight ahead.
Tom had begun to wonder if he'd made a mistake calling Steve after all this time but his back was against the wall.
In July of 1982, Penn Square Bank had collapsed and sent the east Texas oil field into a spiral with cruel indifference to the size or scope of the businesses it was gutting.
Tom had spent the last year watching his receivables dry up while his debt payments remained as constant as taxes.
There were no loans and every rat was climbing over the edge of the boat stepping on anyone that could help them reach the handrail.
Tom was shaken from his internal tale of demise by Steve popping him on the shoulder as he walked into the room.
His face still as jovial as a college football player but the eyes betraying the mask deep and dark, devoid of emotion.
My man, can't believe you're here. Have you taken a milia? Let's have a bite after we wrap up this bit of business.
Still wearing the false grin as he settled into the deep back leather chair behind his desk.
The sun from the window glinted off the deep shine of the desk surface as Tom leaned forward.
Before he could speak, Steve's still nameless assistant placed his hand on Tom's arm, not forcefully but firm as if a need to control the situation had materialized.
The assistant spoke.
Mr. Civello, I looked at the books he brought.
He's over leveraged across the board on equipment loan.
Without funds or a complete reversal in the oil field, Levin's rentals will be out of commission within just a few months.
Tom winced it here in his position explained so coldly.
Steve spoke up.
Tom were friends. Why'd you let the situation get so dire before you called?
I could have helped before things got so tight.
Tom swallowed with a dry throat before moving his arm loose of the assistant's grasp.
He straightened the sleeve of his jacket with his left hand and did his best to trust his own voice to not sound like he felt.
I thought I could release a few pieces and get it back in control, but some of a bitch in OPEC has the whole industry by the Steve cut him off.
Hey, hey, hey, my man.
I don't know anything about oil and OPEC. All sounds like nonsense to me.
I do have money though. I know money. I do have that.
I'm going to help you brother. We go too far back.
Tom relaxed back into the chair. His tension temporarily eased.
I don't know how to thank you brother. Things are going to turn around. This is just a hiccup.
Soon as those Iranians, he trailed off without finishing because Steve leaned forward, his brow furrowing.
The congenial mass disappearing as he clasped his hands on the desk.
Hey, hey man. I know you're going to pay me back.
That's understood my man, but Tom, Tom, I'm not a bank.
I'm not in the company saving business.
This loan is a favor, Tom favors have to be paid back on top of loans.
The smile Steve displayed now resembled the rows of teeth Tom had seen on the sharks he'd caught in the Gulf of Mexico.
The eyes cold, calculating for just a second before the contrived smile of friendship returned to his face.
Tom felt goosebumps raised against the sleeve of his shirt.
A bead of sweat gathered at his neck behind his collar as he mumbled out, thanks, thanks Steve.
Of course, of course, of course.
The assistant spoke as he stood to open the door to the office.
I'll take care of the transfer, Mr. Cibello.
Steve's mask was back now and fully engaged.
Excellent. Now let's go get a bite to eat, brother.
The salmon at Turtle Creek is divine.
You're not going to go home.
Tom stood and stared at the city through the window.
He wasn't sure he wanted to go home, but it didn't have anything to do with fish.
Truthfully, he just wasn't hungry.
Tune in next week for more from The Wildly Bottoms Texas.
Episode 10 in the can.
We done it. Look it up, baby.
We're rockin' on. We're going to get to the bottom of this shit eventually.
I reckon.
How deep is old time in it?
Oh, you just don't know.
Need for money to put people in some uncomfortable situations.
Let's do some testimonials and comments from last week and I got those right here.
A little testimonial if you will daddy.
A little testimonial.
testimonial.
Oh, our good old buddy, David Beckett.
When I was younger, I was the person that if something needed lifted or towed it, I did it by myself.
I never wanted to stand around and wait for help.
I just did it and never thought there would be a time when I could no longer do it without help.
Now at 70, my mind says go for it, but my body says, are you stupid or what?
Young, strong days are long gone.
The want to is still there. The can do is in my love you, JW.
I love you too, brother David. God bless you. Thanks for your testimony.
I think a lot of men can relate to that. I can't do things. I can do 10 years ago.
I still want to though.
I was working on a dagger board the other day and needed to stand it up that big old ride board.
You ain't got something 50 up in there, bro.
I couldn't sit down right for two days. I thought I pulled everything loose from my back.
At Jacob all trades, master of fun. The old man just can't catch a damn break.
First is boy, now a shop. Sheesh.
Also, you somehow give me cold from Texas to Indiana. It's been a hellish weekend.
Brother, I hope you get feeling better soon, man. That sucks.
Hope it warms up a little bit for you guys up there, man.
You know Carl Sr.? Carl Sr. ain't the kind of guy that...
Carl Sr. is one of those type of dudes that's so accustomed to loss that it doesn't faze him as much anymore.
He just figures out how to fix it and goes on.
You can see a bunch of whale and gnashing tears when you got sent off to Vietnam.
He just went over there and did the job they made him do. Came home and don't talk about it.
Carl Sr. is a complex, complex character.
He's a man raised without a father trying to be a father.
And I think he's doing a pretty good job.
At M-T-H-I-B 90210 J-W.
One of my first bicycle ride of the year over the weekend.
What a good time. Have you been out riding this year yet?
No, I have not. I keep threatening to go ride that bicycle. This is the real deal.
This is just nowhere safe around here to ride.
And I didn't have a little carrier for my Mazda or a way to move the bike around my Mazda.
I'm excited about the Avalanche because just about a mile, two miles down the road,
through some really congested traffic, there's a bunch of bike trails and stuff down in Buffalo Bay.
And I love riding those trails.
I mean, granted, there might be a serial killer down there now, even though they keep assuring us there ain't,
but boy, sure are a lot of bodies popping up in that bay.
I think I'll be riding when the sun's out.
You know, but also, I'm a big old boy. You know what I mean?
And I think if I've never been a serial killer, but I just think if I was out there looking for somebody to do something I got to,
I wouldn't pick a guy that was going to be heavy and a lot of work to move around and tote.
You know.
But yeah, that's my idea. Like I've got the bike all fixed up, I threw my spokes and done it all.
It's all all ready.
And I think I get the Avalanche over here. I'm going to make me a little, I have a little board I made for my last truck,
carry my bike in, set the bike up with the wheel turned over the tailgate.
I'll probably just tote the bike like that and I can run down there above a little bay and get me a ride in a few days a week.
Where I don't have to worry about getting run over.
Because around here is not a good place to ride.
I got a lot of work to do so I can't afford to get my brain broke again right now.
That's the other thing. I have to wear a helmet now. I have to.
Like I know you're supposed to, but I have to.
My, you know, the neurologist that worked with me when I broke my brain last time,
I've had three or four major head injuries in my life and after that fall off the roof,
he told me and my doctor fat told me, you might not have another one in you.
Okay, you got you a good old hard head, but you done bounced off everything you can bounce it off of.
And I don't think you got any more hard hits left in you. The next one's going to do some pretty permanent damage.
They both admonished me and of course they told my wife so she's not going to let me out of the house without a helmet on.
I hate bike helmets because they just look so big and tall and stupid on my head and they feels like they're catching the wind.
I wish somebody made like a really snug one that fits down that's a little more, they're already dumb looking.
I don't really care about looking cool, but I would just like it to fit my head a little better.
I used to wear a BMX helmet, but then it just looked like it was orange.
It looked like I had a big pumpkin on my head and bike helmets are high dollar.
I saw this crazy thing that you can wear is like a collar and something happens when you fall off your bike,
it inflates around your head, makes a magic helmet pops out nowhere, but it's like $400 and you can only use it once.
I might look around and see if I can find me a sleeker helmet or something that fits better, you know.
But there I am worrying about how shit feels and looks and is the sleeker helmet going to do as much keeping my brain together?
And not that I intend on falling off my bike, but I know me and I like to fall off shit.
And you just never know when you're going to come around a trail and bump into somebody else.
It's kind of crazy the way it's set up there.
So they have these trails for walking and walking your dogs and then they have a separate trail for jogging only.
But they want you to ride your bike on the walking your dog trail.
And these people just walk their dogs with no sense of self-awareness whatsoever.
So they'll be over here on this side of the path, six foot wide path in some places,
and your dog will be completely on the other side of the path doing fuck all and what all, you know.
I don't know how many people's dogs I've almost run over, how many people I've almost run over coming around a curve and all of a sudden there's just somebody taking up the whole path.
So we need to figure out some better head protection, I guess.
That's a me problem. Let's get back to you.
Let's wrap this thing up.
Hopefully I can get this son 50 edited and get you guys away on time.
Let's think about all this advertising stuff and the have nots and the hads and the way they can make a feel at times.
It's sobering to know that every day of your life someone's trying to sell you something.
Television was invented to sell products.
Every show you loved while they were written by folks trying to tell stories have been co-opted to sell you a lifestyle.
Streaming service with exclusivity, you know.
Soap operas were literally called that because they were utilized to sell soap.
That's why I make jokes about brands. I'm not trying to insult you personally.
I'm trying to tell you that your identity isn't something you can buy.
You don't have to base your whole personality around a brand or a tangible good.
It's literally the whole point of truck astrology.
I was the kid who got made fun of for the Kmart and hand me down clothes.
I believed, truly believed that I could stop being an outsider watching if I bought the right things.
Got the password to get in.
I did and I still felt like an outsider because I didn't believe in it.
I try to be sincere in my marketing. I know it's a necessary evil.
It's something I had to do. I have to do it to survive as an entertainer.
But also why most of my content is on the internet for free.
No one has to buy anything to be in this club.
If you'll notice, I always suddenly champion the broke guys using what they got to get by because that's what I believe in.
Sure, I make jokes about them because I love those folks enough to be honest.
But they're jokes I've lived in.
I was raised, taught, mentored by men with dirty hands and complicated hearts.
I suspect a great deal of you were too.
Take a minute to really look around at everyone trying to sell you something this week.
Whether it's sunglasses and a lifestyle or don dish washing commercials utilizing cartoon ducks
to try to convince you that Procter & Gamble's petrochemical needs weren't responsible for ducks getting covered in oil to begin with.
Ducks that a handful of were saved by soap made with petroleum products.
I bet if you look really hard around you, you'll begin to see it for yourself.
You don't need the right boots or the right cooler or the right truck.
It's okay to want them and work for something you genuinely want, but you don't need them to be worthy.
They're not going to change the direction of your journey.
I forgot to say, you're already worthy in my eyes. That's why I'm rooting for you.
I'm J.W. and I love you.
Oh, sorry. I had some fire on my chest this morning, this afternoon.
Oh, y'all. Sometimes it feels like an old Baptist preacher.
Boy, it's on my heart to talk to y'all about this.
On a less serious note, I hope you guys have a great week.
Thank you for sharing your Sunday with me. Hope I get this up in time that you get to enjoy it.
Hope you guys are listening while you're out doing your thing this week.
Maybe you'll relate to some of what I said. I hope so.
We're all going to be all right.
I promise you that.
Even those of us that haven't learned all these lessons, we're going to figure them out.
Some people got to learn shit the hard way.
I'm just trying to help as many people learn less stuff the hard way as I can.
Because I learned a mess of it the hard way and it's a sucky way to learn.
It's a sucky way to learn.
Hope you get around obstacles in your life like Teflon this week.
I hope you spend a lot of this week feeling worthy.
That's what I really hope.
If you really need something boost your spirits, go on YouTube and search Johnny Blue Skies Mutiny at Midnight.
Listen to what some Kentucky boy thinks is disco.
And I guarantee you if that music don't make your legs shake and your ass shake a little bit, then you might not have a soul left.
I don't know.
I got it to pick you up.
And the way you did it kind of forces you to just listen to the whole album.
I can't remember the last time I just sat down and listened to the whole album in front of the back as the artist intended.
But it was a nice departure.
I find myself, every time I've listened to it, that's what I've done.
I just played it and let it go and just enjoyed myself.
Maybe some of you enjoy it too.
I'll let the bastards get you down.
And if you're in Fredericksburg, Texas this weekend, this coming weekend, then come on out and see your old boy.
It ain't going to be the greatest night of your life, but it's going to be a good one.
We don't have us a hell of a time.
Might even convince you to buy some stickers.
Woo.
Lord, I won't use no cartoon ducks.
I promise you that.
All right.
Love you guys.
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