S2 Ep23: Vietnam Podcast Special: Leeches, Close Calls & An Embarrassing Bathrobe Malfunction!

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We were going along and then suddenly I couldn't just see noon,

like trying to look in the mirror on the bike turns around and looks at me

and I can just see this little leech worm thing crawling up and I'm like...

Hello everyone and welcome back to the Auto Alex podcast.

If you're looking with your eye holes, you will see that the stage

or the set is a little bit different because we are in the hotel room.

I'm joined by Mr. Tom Lenthal.

Hello.

Mr. Garret Potter.

Good morning.

Erroray.

What are you doing Erroray?

I'm constipated.

You are very constipated.

Before we get on to your annals, we are very, very far away.

In fact, it would take us 116 days to walk back.

I checked on Google.

Really?

We're in Vietnam, 12,467 kilometers away, which is about 7,700 miles away.

We are doing our big Vietnam special where we have been riding motorcycles from...

Where was it?

Hoa Hin?

I can't remember any of the names.

No.

It's Ho Chi Minh City.

Ho Chi Minh City.

Or Saigon.

To...

Where are we now?

Hanoi.

No, we're not.

No.

Oh my God.

Hoi An.

There is no Hoi An.

Yeah, yeah.

We're flying to Ho Chi Minh City this afternoon.

No, that's wrong too.

Hoi An.

Right.

Okay, good.

It's been true.

No, that's wrong too.

No, that's wrong.

Hanoi.

Which city are we flying from?

Da Nang.

Da Nang, close, close, Tom.

Right, anyway, we've been on motorcycles for, what, seven or eight days?

Yes, yeah.

And that's why none of us make sense.

Yeah, and we have covered around 900 miles.

So we thought we would do a Vietnam podcast special.

So it's basically only going to be about what we've been up to, which is a lot.

Shall we get started with you, Tom, because you've never been to Vietnam.

Is it what you expected?

And we're looking outside a window now and there is pretty much a typhoon going on.

It is raining, it's very wet, very windy, but you've enjoyed yourself.

I've enjoyed myself.

I wasn't really sure what to expect, although I kind of like, you know,

we're going to ride motorbikes, we're going to do this, we're going to do that.

And I've seen a little bit on Tintinet and all the rest of it.

It has been an amazing experience.

It's just, I wasn't, it was just, it's all the weather conditions and how, you know,

so as an example, when we landed, it was really hot and humid.

And I thought, ah, it's all going to be like that.

I thought, no problem.

That's okay.

I can deal with that.

And then I set myself up for that.

But then rather foolishly, what I didn't realise was once you got up into the mountains

and it got freezing cold, because it literally when you're riding the bike,

it's really, really cold.

And we had open face helmets with short little visors and the rain coming down

and stinging my face.

And there's so many things that I would do slightly differently now

to set myself up for this trip.

What, like not accepting the invitation to come?

But no.

No, just, just equipment-wise and stuff like that.

But so that's been quite challenging at times.

Yeah.

And riding at night has been quite challenging.

And we've had some, we've had some real highs and lows, haven't we?

We have.

And some near misses.

Lots of near misses.

But ultimately we survived and we're setting out.

And yeah, it's been pretty awesome.

Yeah, we'll get into a few stories in a little bit.

But Gareth, you and I have been to Vietnam.

We've done Thailand, but for me especially and probably for you as well.

We have never seen as much of those countries as we have on this trip.

Yeah, yeah, massively.

And also the, I mean, it's a long country and it covers loads and loads of different environments.

And then the altitude as well is something that we didn't experience.

So Tom, you all right?

It gets, it gets chapping, which is weird when you consider Vietnam.

And I remember Chris giving us a whole bunch of hoodies.

And I was like, are you crazy man?

It's so hot.

But up in the mountains, the altitude just strips all the heat away from you.

And if you're wearing mesh jackets like we were from Knox, they great for conditions like this.

It's really warm outside and it's raining.

But up in the mountains, you're freezing cold and you just want to grab literally any t-shirt

and start layering up.

It wasn't just the temperature there, was it?

It was the fact that you were also soaking wet.

Yes.

We're not mentioning the fact that it rained.

It rained a lot.

So the crazy thing as well is that all the crazy weather is on the Vietnamese TikTok.

This is unusually bad.

Yeah, we didn't realise how, we just thought that this was normal Vietnamese weather,

but it's not.

It's not.

It's more sort of, shut up.

Anyway, but it's extreme even for this country.

I mean, there's roads missing.

So our guide was showing us the Vietnamese TikTok.

Vietnamese, that's how you say it, Tom.

That's what I said, did I?

I mean, there's roads that have just been washed away.

There's loads of landslides.

This is actually the heaviest downfall of rain they've ever had in one month.

Really?

Wow.

It is treacherous.

Yeah, it was actually showing us a road that we were riding on two, three days ago.

It's literally falling in half.

Yeah.

Falling down the side of the mountain.

But I think where we rode through it, it was starting to collapse.

Because remember, we had to take a detour around the collapse,

but now the roads just disappeared.

Yeah, it's cool.

So we've been doing, well, we've pretty much shot,

we've still got another morning of shooting to do,

but we have shot three episodes since we've been out here.

So, Maury, you can probably talk us through in a little bit more detail,

but we landed, we had two bikes that we bought from Titchit,

then we had to find another bike for me that we did.

Episode two, then the adventure started,

and then episode three, the adventure continued.

But in your eyes, is it how we wanted to plan the trip?

Has it all gone according to plan,

or have there maybe been some things that have happened

that have maybe made the trip better or worse?

What do you think?

I don't think anything has gone according to plan,

except for the fact that we're in Vietnam.

Yeah, we had a slight incident in buying probably one of the world's worst bikes.

Yeah, she's poops, she's quite.

If you're talking about Veronica,

are you watching?

I am talking about your most unreliable bike purchase,

shittest vehicle we ever have owned, Veronica.

And I think it'll probably come across,

you know, that it's broke so much that people will be like,

no, that can't have happened.

It ended up with just basically being a tour

of every single bike workshop in Vietnam.

We found motorbike repair shops like,

I can't believe how we just stumbled across them.

You even managed to break down in front of them.

I did, yeah.

No one will believe that.

Exactly, exactly.

I think all of the breakdowns that have happened

and there have been multiple, not only me, Tom,

because you did do some damage to your bike

and Gareth, yours also needed some fixing.

But that has, in my eyes,

brought out the best of the Vietnamese people.

Not, you know, they probably,

they always have been like that,

but we've never been exposed to that.

But, you know, when you break down,

they are so resourceful, so helpful.

And their nature is also awesome, isn't it?

It's great, yeah, they don't live above their means.

They are happy with what they got

and they make the most of everything they have.

It's the spirit of making the most that they have.

That rings true when you mess your bike up

and they've always got repair kits,

they've always got spares.

And if they don't, they know someone a kilometre away

because there's always a bike shop every kilometre.

It's literally, you can be next to the bike shop

and go, ah, you know what, I really could do with a poncho.

And it's like, oh yeah, that's the shop next door.

Yeah, yeah, that's the poncho shop.

Yeah, it literally did happen.

It was literally two shops down.

Yeah, yeah.

So we've not been riding alone, obviously.

There's been three of us on bikes,

you know, doing the video presenting.

Then we've had Rory, who's been a pillion on a bike.

Rory's brother, Tom, who's hiding behind the lampshade.

Hello, Tom.

Also riding pillion.

So we have two amazing guides.

We've got a guy called Nguyen, who's 29 years old.

He works for Tidget.

And then we've got a 20 year old guy called Huay,

who also works for Tidget.

And without those guys,

none of this would have been possible.

No, no, we would still be in Ho Chi Minh.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, like, I cannot say how good these two guys were.

Yeah.

And the work ethic as well,

there was nothing too like,

we would come up with some stupid requests of,

can we do this?

And they'd be like, yeah, no problem.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I've arranged it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And also just the generosity of everyone

that we've come across the way as well.

So we wanted to do a review on one of the VinFast cars,

which is a local car brand here.

And anyway, we were like, how do we get a whole,

and then Nguyen obviously managed to just organize it.

And then we had wanted yesterday that we reviewed.

But the crazy thing is on the way out,

our hotel sort of meet and greet person came out.

Oh, I've got one of them.

Do you guys want to just use it?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Imagine just giving your car to some random strangers.

She did also say, you pay me.

She asked, she has two conditions.

One, have you got a license,

which we do have already, a natural license.

And it was like, if you break it, you pay.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But that was the same deal with the higher one, wasn't it?

Pretty much, yeah, pretty much.

Which you told me as I was sliding through a corner.

Oh, God, yeah.

So yeah, we've got a V2 episode of us driving this VinFast VF3.

And it's effectively a quadricycle.

When you get it up to any meaningful speed.

And try the corner.

Yeah.

Bearing in mind, it's got a top speed of 100 kilometers an hour.

I looked down on the dials and we were doing 106, Tom.

Downhill.

And I went flat through the corner.

Yeah.

And it turns out it doesn't handle too good.

No.

Especially when you're nearly doubling the weight of the car

with the opposite.

Yeah.

So all four of us are in there.

We were riding the bump stops in the rear.

And it just wasn't a happy little V2.

No.

Yeah.

I just tipped it in and it went, oh.

But yeah, bringing it back, obviously, to our trip.

So we have had a few discussions about how much does it

cost to come out to Vietnam?

How much do hotels cost?

How much does food cost?

Yeah.

And then we quickly came to the realization that all of those

costs added together equates to what you could probably get in

Europe and you wouldn't be living like kings.

Roy, you've probably got a bit more information on prices

and stuff.

Because I think all of us would say, if you want to go on

holiday and if you want to push yourself a little bit to do

something different, go to Vietnam.

Because yes, it takes a long time to get here and get back.

But once you're here, you literally live like kings.

You see a completely new culture.

It's a bargain.

I am converted because I do like to go away for a nice week.

I came in with my wife as you know.

And I've worked out for the cost of a very, very nice hotel

in Europe and a short flight and all the rest of it.

We could probably come here and spend a week, 10 days.

It's been the same amount of money.

It's crazy.

It's really good value for money.

One thing I will say is if you do want to challenge yourself

and get onto a motorbike, maybe just around the town to start off with,

will be fine.

It's not a novice thing, is it?

Yeah, if you want to go for a more hairy ride,

sort of like what we did up in the mountains in this sort of weather,

just be careful.

Be really, really cautious.

Some of us had to be more careful than others, didn't we, Gareth?

Yeah, so I just crashed bikes.

And they come onto wheels and I just crash them.

I remember just coming around the corner.

Your bike was just on the floor.

I was like, what's happened here?

Yeah, it just locked up the front in gravel.

And I was just like, I'm going down.

And I was like, I'll roll this out.

You managed to crash a bike as well, Roy?

I did, Roy.

Yeah, technically I did crash a bike.

And Tom, so do you.

You weren't even on the bike and you managed to crash.

All I was doing was getting my phone out of my bag.

Yeah, with your big old hand-fisted mate on that.

It literally just fell over.

Your crash was so bad, it was actually a bike-on-bike crash as well.

Yeah, it did fall over and go into it.

It was very nearly bike-on-man bike.

Yeah, it did nearly get him in there.

No, nearly got me.

Well, that doesn't matter.

No, it did, but it did get him in there.

Oh, did it?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, the bike fell under it.

That's all right, he's the one.

It's bulletproof, that's it.

So we're talking about basically, Tom was so get up.

He were parked off and the bike on its kickstand was very, I would say...

Kickstand, sidestand.

Sidestand, it was just something.

He didn't park his bike properly, that's what we're saying.

Yeah, yeah, I messed up.

And then the bike basically just tippled over.

It did just tip over, went into the next bike and then into nearly Alex.

And it did get you in there.

I'm just having flashbacks of my Fireblade and the S1000RR

just lying on top of each other in my garage, crushing each other.

Yeah, well, you've done that, haven't you?

Yeah, yeah.

But going back to prices, Rory, the average couple or so,

like if they wanted to do a bit of an adventure and Live Like Kings as well,

because we are in a five-star hotel.

Yeah, yeah.

And the thing is as well, the flights have actually come down a lot.

As long as you're flexible, I think the main thing is would go in places like this is,

if you say, I need to go away on a Friday and be back on this Tuesday,

you're going to be paying like probably £700, £800 for a flight.

But if you can go, all right, I can go away in March

and then select the whole month, go on any website, Skyscanner or whatever it is,

and then be flexible dates, you can get away on a good airline like Qatar Airways,

which is what we flew with.

You can get a return flight for like £380, which is like to get somewhere like this is insane.

It clicked with me when we went to the first, what I call,

we stayed in the apartment on the first couple of nights, didn't we?

And then when we went to our first, what I would call a nice hotel,

so it's like a four, five-star hotel or whatever.

And I spoke to you, and it was like £38 a night for a double room,

and I was like, you've got to be kidding me.

And even this one that we're in now, was it £50 a night?

£50 a night, but these are five-star hotels.

You can stay in an equivalent to like a travel lodge,

Premier Inn or whatever like that.

Those are like £12 a night.

These aren't bad hotels for that price.

So just for context, sorry, this is £50 a night.

Brother Tom, would you mind just moving the camera

and just showing what this bedroom looks like?

Because you're obviously seeing a very small portion of it.

There is the world's biggest round bed.

There is a bath, a shower, a toilet

with one of those tap things to clean your house,

which is a game changer.

You like them? Oh, I like them.

We're thinking of getting them installed.

You know what? I'm getting new bathrooms in my new house,

and I think I'm going to ask Ryan.

Yeah, you're going to get Jet Watch.

I built it. You bought one of those Jet Watch.

You're going to use a bum bum Jet Watch.

Or my bum bum.

Because you know, out here, if you eat something dodgy,

you and I both...

Yes, yeah.

Like toilet paper just doesn't cut it anymore.

It just stings a bit there.

It's like, well, really?

Well, some of them are on really high,

so that they're adjustable,

but you don't know how high they are until you use it for the first...

Oh, are they adjustable?

Yeah, so there's a knob that you can turn it up and down, yeah.

And then sometimes someone who obviously

has been in your room before you has wanted really high pressure.

Well, I had a dribble one, and I know you really have to.

No, there was one of them in the last hotel.

I thought it was going to come from my mouth.

It was bad.

Oh, my God, yeah.

This is where you step in, it just comes in.

No, no, every good podcast.

It's a shit talk, isn't it?

But the other thing is, what about these hotels?

The breakfast.

Yeah.

Oh, mind-blowing.

You think a buffet in England is good.

Oh, yeah, but...

It's nothing to come through an aged hotel.

If you like drinking tea in the morning like me,

I would strongly suggest bringing your own tea bags.

That's finger one.

The coffee is very good, though, so if you're breakfast...

Yeah, yeah, yeah, coffee's coffee, isn't it?

It's very good coffee.

Whoa, you can't say coffee's coffee.

And there's robust out here, anorabic,

so if you're a coffee nut, then...

The buffet breakfast is like nothing I've ever seen before,

because there's rice and chicken,

and they don't do breakfast in the same way we do breakfast, do they?

No.

But also, we did find out that Tom is not the best at trying new things, I would say.

I'm not great, but Tom, you...

I think that's a little bit unfair.

You took it to a new level.

He is the Carl Pilkenton of our generation, isn't he?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We were saying that Tom is literally just an idiot abroad.

He's quite amazing to see, though.

He's just like sitting there going,

what can I have a fork, then?

It's like, well, they use chopsticks here to...

Yeah, but I want a fork.

Yeah, but to be fair, I have...

I mean, there was another word put in front of fork,

but I can't say that really.

I have learned how to use chopsticks.

You have, Tom.

I've adapted and overcome already.

You have.

So question, when you take Meg out to a nice fancy Chinese or Vietnamese restaurant,

are you going to use chopsticks?

Oh, I'm going to show off.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, 100%.

Wow.

Impressive.

Did my tuition help you with your chopsticks?

Oh, yeah, definitely.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, I've got it now.

I've got the knack of it.

So I've been using them since I was a child.

Really?

Yeah, I was forced.

Yeah, my mum was like,

God, you will your chopsticks!

It was when you...

She's doing away all the forks, all the spoons, and all the knives.

It was when you sent a picture of me stabbing something to your mum for reaction.

No, I said to them a whole Chinese side of the family,

and they were just really insulted that you did that to the food.

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Should we talk a bit about our journey, where we started,

where we've ended, and maybe some highs and lows?

Maybe Rory, if you kind of map where we've come from and where we are now.

Yep. So we landed in Ho Chi Minh.

Yeah.

And our first goal was obviously to buy the bike,

which was a challenge in itself because where do you even start

with buying a bike in a completely strange country?

Like, there's not really a Facebook marketplace here.

There's not like, we couldn't just go on eBay and just buy something,

or go on AutoTrader, phone them up and go, yeah, yeah, we'll buy it.

So anyway, we spoke to a new one who is our local guide,

and next thing you know, we're going to this shop that he's taken us to,

because we said we'd want something a bit interesting.

We just want something, a normal bike.

We don't want to go to a normal dealership where we'll find a new bike,

and it'll be boring and easy.

Because that's too easy.

Exactly. And everything's scripted.

But we did, in one day, like this wasn't that the bike was pre-bought or anything like that.

In one day, we went there, we looked at it, we bought it, and then made some changes.

Buying it was also a challenge as well, because it was so shit.

We should have known when the guy literally,

he literally said, I don't want to sell this bike to you.

Yeah, he said how much it was, and then we were like, okay.

And then he was like, oh no, now I'm in trouble.

Yeah.

And then we managed to convince him.

Yeah, he thought it was massively overpriced.

Yeah, probably, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But yeah, we then basically moved up the country.

So we made our first stop in this national reserve.

Does anyone remember the name of it?

This is Jungle.

Tom?

It's Catty N.

Catty N.

Oh, brother Tom.

Catty N, which that was our first night in an interesting place, I would say.

But we turned up there in the pitch black.

Oh, that was the Eco Lodge.

That was the Eco Lodge, yeah.

Yeah, it was dark when we got there and we couldn't see a thing.

No, so we literally did our first day and it ended up with us riding in the pissing rain.

And we arrived there and we were dripping wet and everything like that.

And then we got into the hotel.

We all tried to dry our stuff.

Some of us were sharing some of our rooms

with other people.

We didn't want those people in our room, but they were in there.

Oh, do you mean the little bug people?

No, yeah.

Oh, we are joins.

There's a little knock at the door.

Clear point shows.

And we are joined now by Nguyen, who is our...

Nguyen.

We've got Nguyen.

Let's put that back.

Right, Nguyen.

Okay.

Bring it in, bring it in.

Let's give you a bit of space.

Come on.

So if you're watching with your eye holes, this is Nguyen.

He is our amazing guide.

He works for Tidget.

And you have an Instagram as well.

So if you want to do like a bike ride, then go to Tidget

and ask for Nguyen.

What's your Instagram?

WintyMan is my Instagram.

We were just talking about our trip, and Rory was just going

through, you know, where we started.

We were at Catiyen at the moment, aren't we?

So we're standing in Catiyen.

I had some weird insect in my room, and you had a scorpion.

Yeah, I had a scorpion trying to get it into the room,

and I pointed at it.

Holy shit, that's a scorpion.

Kill it, Alice.

Get it, get it, get it.

And he got squashed.

And then I got some chopsticks, and I smashed it in my mouth.

So you dipped it in some sugar.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But going back to prices as well, that one was seven pounds a night.

Seven quid, yeah, seven quid.

And it included breakfast.

So if you don't mind living with animals, seven pound

will get you a room for the night.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Is that how your wife feels?

Millipede.

I had some weird millipede.

I don't know what it was, but it had little tentacles coming off it.

And then there were two beds in the room, and it crawled under one bed

that I was originally sleeping on, and I was like,

well, I'm going to move over to the other bed.

And I moved over to the other bed, and it crawled under that one.

And I was like, this is great.

And I couldn't see where it was going.

It was going somewhere.

I just had this fear of waking up, and there'd just be

like some weird insect in my mouth.

That was the place where I walked in there at night,

and I've turned the lights off.

But I didn't realise that I turned the lights off.

I turned the whole main switch off.

And then I woke up at half past two in the morning sweating

like a lunatic, because I actually turned the AC off as well.

And I was googling how to turn the AC back on,

so I couldn't do it.

And then I realised I just turned everything off.

I would have loved to have seen that.

Oh, it was good.

That was our first night of trying to work out

how we were going to dry our clothes as well,

because they got soaked.

So I think a few of us have tried a few different techniques.

I had some stuff outside, some stuff inside.

I think Tom...

The stuff outside just didn't dry at all.

Yeah, so we worked that.

But it's so humid outside,

even though it was like 28 or whatever like that,

it just didn't dry.

So you had to bring it inside to let the air con dry out,

which was weird.

But being in this position before in Durban,

similar sort of humidity, you crack the air con on,

lowest it can go,

and then you get all the fans in the room working,

and you just know it's really energy intensive.

But your stuff is crispy dry in the morning.

Crispy dry.

And then where did we go from there?

Cati and we went to...

Dalat.

Was it next to it?

Yeah, so Dalat is the like...

It's basically quite high altitude.

I think it's about 1,500, 1,600 meters.

Yeah, 1,500 meters.

And it's...

How would you describe it?

And it's more of a...

I don't know, it's somewhere where a lot of local people go

for a holiday, isn't it?

Like it's...

There wasn't many tourists there.

There is a few touristy things to do.

Like there was Mario Kart we were meant to do,

but we ran out of time because of...

What reason, Alex?

If you're going to say anything about Veronica,

you keep your dirty mouth shut.

Perhaps it's because bike is shit.

And then, yeah, we went to a night market there,

which was interesting, wasn't it, Tal?

Oh, that was really good.

That was really good fun.

Do you have the hat?

You're going to show the audience.

He's in my bag.

We went to a night market and we bought some hats,

didn't we, with little ears that flop up,

which is quite funny.

And then Alex asked me prior to going to the market

if I would like to try a certain fruit.

And me being the boy that I am,

because I didn't know any better, I said yes.

And we shook on it.

And we did it. We had a deal.

And you don't welch on a deal, do you, Tom?

You don't welch on a deal, Alex.

So I just don't do that.

To say that the fruit in question was mildly disgusting.

Yeah, well, there's a reason it's banned on subways, hotels,

just generalised.

Yeah, there was even there's warnings on the hotels saying,

or not warning, you know,

this is not allowed in the hotel,

but I'm now fully informed.

You know, and yeah, we had a little go on this bit of fruit

and I was yacking.

My body immediately rejected it.

Immediately, it just came flying out.

And then I was just like, and Alex is there with a plastic bag.

So for those who don't know,

durian has a very weird smell to it.

It is almost like vomit.

Yes.

It's very, very bad.

Vomit is shit.

Yeah, it's horrible.

So the question, do a lot of local people actually eat that?

Or is it more of a quiet taste?

I think it depends on a person,

but most of people in Vietnam would eat it.

So do you eat it?

Yeah, I love it.

Describe the taste.

No, you don't.

Describe the taste.

No, you don't.

No way.

Yeah.

The thing that really got me is when I was expecting it to be

of a consistent, you know, sort of like,

you know, like hard all the way through, you know.

Expecting just an apple or something.

Yeah, that's kind of, or a pear or something like that.

So it's got like a sort of like,

quite a, it's got like a skin type exterior.

And then when you bite into it, it's just like...

Is it like custard?

It's like mashed potato.

Just came squirting out into my mouth.

And then it was just like, oh, it's making me feel bad just talking about it.

And I was like, oh my God, it was like, you know,

it was, oh, it was just felt so alien and awful.

And yeah, I couldn't leave it on my mouth.

It was just, yeah, I had to go.

And the best thing is obviously we've got the vlog camera with us.

So we have got all of these amazing little moments on camera,

and it will make you feel like you're with us.

Yeah, I would, I would cherish that face for life.

Yeah.

It was, it was bad.

Yeah, so wrong, wrong to laugh.

Natrang?

Natrang.

Yes.

People go to Natrang.

It is very much a Russian part of Vietnam.

Oh, is that the coastal city?

Yeah, it's like Ibiza for Russians, basically.

It's, I don't know, it's a bit of an odd one.

A nice place.

And we had a Mexican there that was really, really good.

And the hotel was actually really nice.

We were in a hotel and we met some Russians,

which was interesting because they started talking about the war

and saying that they were kind of out of it.

And then this guy actually lived in Natrang.

Cornwall.

Was it the Cornwall guy?

Yeah, he lived in Cornwall.

The Cornwall Russian.

And then now he lives in Natrang.

Now that's his, that's his place for residence.

And then from there we went to...

Well, that was, that was a place where we saw the most sort of like,

probably devastation from the typhoon.

No, no, that was the next bit.

That was...

Yeah, recently.

Was that the next day?

Yeah, yeah, Tommy, it all blends into one, doesn't it?

Wow, that's bad.

We've done a fair bit.

So this was, well, next place was called...

Quinyun.

Which, again, another seaside sort of resort.

But unfortunately, it got very much hammered by the typhoon.

Yeah, we were going along and there was some restaurants

that we were originally going to go to.

And they were on the beachfront.

And they just weren't there anymore.

Yeah, disappeared.

It was when we were riding in and there was just sand all over the road.

And I was thinking, you think they'd clean up, really, wouldn't you?

You know, but then they dawned on me that they have been cleaning up

for the last week and a half.

Yeah, I cannot tell you how quick people in Vietnam

just get on with things and just go, all right, well, I need to clean up.

Well, I mean, we've seen the work ethic from New Year, haven't we?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's insane how quickly they've managed to move on from...

So just while we're talking about Vietnamese doing work,

the road works that we saw.

Zero warning, right?

Zero warning, a couple of blokes in the middle of the road,

filling a pothole and we're all just driving around it.

And I'm like, oh, my God.

And then there's a lorry on the wrong side of the road coming up.

Yeah, yeah, he's so hot.

And everything's got air horns.

When you have a little motorbike helmet, it's coming out at like 120 decibels.

And all the lights, you know.

Those air horns are going to haunt you.

They are going to haunt me, yeah.

I did watch, like, watching them over and over,

wherever I'd see, like, someone coming up behind,

they're doing massive air horn.

And I just see this little, sort of, from Alex usually,

whereas this little, like, driving along, air horn goes off and then he's like...

And that's a little job where he's obviously just been

scared of a massive truck coming.

Because they come out of nowhere.

They come at some great speed, don't they?

Especially the buses, the bus and coach.

The road drivers are insane.

You know what's really weird?

The roads are absolutely terrifying.

But then as you ride more and more,

you're like a truck in my leg, that's fine.

I just go, I literally go around him.

And there's a truck in front of me.

I'm literally undertaking.

Everyone's always so chilled, like, you get cut up,

or you're having a beer crash and you're like, okay, just keep going.

It's Vietnam, I'll get used to it.

And no one's in a rush, except for the coach drivers.

Oh, the coach drivers are in a rush.

Oh, the taxis.

And the taxis.

They are in a massive rush.

It is funny, like, there were moments where we would break down,

and then we would be in the road, broken down.

Usually, anywhere else, we'd be like,

and we need to move, guys, this isn't safe.

But no, we've then just acquired the whole part of that road then.

And then we've just moved into the middle of the road, going like,

you know, right, how's it going?

As a truck goes flying past us, we're like...

Meanwhile, I'm going down the road,

trying to bump start my bike on the wrong side of the road.

And I'm like, yeah, this is normal.

And then just doing U-turns on blind bends, because people expect it.

Like, it's so stupid.

And all they do is beep, beep, beep, beep, just for you to know that they're there.

Yeah, yeah.

And you're in the middle of the road, you're in the wrong,

but they're like, dude, dude, and then you'll move out and carry on.

Yeah.

All right, so where did we continue the journey then?

Oh, now I'm going to lose track of where we were.

So then after then...

We have our handy tour guide.

We went to Mang...

Mangden, yes.

Mangden, yeah.

So Mangden, we went back into the mountains again.

And then that's when just the weather got very bad.

That was true.

Very bad, really.

Yeah.

And we were always quite late and it got quite dark.

This was...

Why were we late, Alex?

Alex, yeah.

Because we're still on UK time and you weren't waking up in time.

Nothing to do with how bad your bike was.

Veronica was...

She was a troubling, mistress, she really was.

But I've got to start to also say that when we've been talking to Nuri,

does tours all the time with people from the UK

and you never, ever arrive in the dark, yeah?

Rarely.

Very rarely, yeah.

Very, very rarely.

How many nights have we ridden?

I think half of it.

I've said more than half.

It's more than half that we arrived.

I think we did one day and on a whole trip that we arrived

and the sun was still setting but it hadn't fully set.

Other than that, it was night.

Every single night.

When we did arrive early, it was rush hour but still dark.

Yeah, yeah.

And it's rush hour and if you've ever seen videos online, YouTube, etc.

of Vietnam rush hour going into a city, it's organised carnage.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But it works.

It works.

I didn't see one crash.

It's the swarm.

The only crashes I saw were from us white people.

Who put that gravel there?

The other thing as well, just before we mention it,

we obviously had Noon.

Noon is really experienced with doing a lot of these tools

but the other guy that we had, Quay,

he has never really even left Ho Chi Minh before.

This is his first time.

Also, right now as we're speaking, he's doing another first.

Yes, he's flying home for the first time.

So it was amazing getting to see him experience his own country

and seeing different parts of it and then leaving

because he's a city boy, he stays in the city, that's what he does.

So he was getting to go out and see all of these other things.

But also because Ho Chi Minh as well is so hot,

it never really gets cold in Ho Chi Minh.

So we were getting into Latin, we were cold and he was freezing.

Like you would see him literally just shivering,

trying to ride this bike up.

So yeah, it was honestly,

but the dedication, he just kept going and going and going

and then the bike would break

and because he was sort of a mechanic as well,

he would literally stop and then stop trying to fix the bike.

That's been fantastic.

Yeah, because that's the other thing

and all these places we stopped,

which obviously every single one of them,

we did stop because Alex's bike was so crap.

We would stop there and not only would you go to a mechanic shop

and then the mechanic would help you,

they would let them play because he would have obviously time

to then fix the other things on the bikes as well.

He would just pick up their tools and start fixing the bikes.

I couldn't believe how you could literally pull up at a workshop,

have a quick chat with the guy that owns it

and then just start using all of his tools

and just crack on and start fixing the bike.

And then at the end of it, they wouldn't even charge us

and sometimes they were refusing to take money off of us.

Would you let that happen at Tom Lenthal Limited?

Oh, no.

What about if a Vietnamese man came up on his motorbike

and said, could I borrow some tools? I'm stuck.

Oh, yeah, that's different.

Okay.

Well, I don't fix motorbikes

and I've got a newfound respect for the Vietnamese.

So maybe it's a little bit of that.

They've looked and thought, he's poor white guys.

They're broken down.

They have an excuse to use some tools.

Some bloke in Ho Chi Minh City tucked him right up.

And now we've got to help him out of this.

He was amazing because he...

I don't know, the guy who owned the bike shop

literally lost interest.

And he rebuilt the whole clutch and you're like...

So yeah, we had clutch issues, throttle cable issues.

Generator issues.

Generator, so you're like alternator issues.

Welding issues.

Exhaust issues.

Yeah, self-inflicted exhaust issues.

Yeah, the guy let me use his welder.

Correct?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Started welding exhaust.

So yeah, if you follow any of us on Instagram,

you'll get little snippets of what we've been up to.

But yeah, Nguyen, how many kind of tours

do you think you've done?

How long have you worked for Tidget as well?

So I've been working with Tidget for like almost four years now.

And I believe that I do at least two a month.

Two a month.

But these can be like what, so your next tour, for example,

is from Hanoi to Ho Chi Minh?

Yes, correct.

Which is 14 days?

Yes, it is 14 days.

So you say you do two a month for that?

At least.

If it's that length, you're literally just out for the month.

Actually with that one, like sometimes we just do four days

or seven or something like that.

But it's still long, you're doing them a long time.

Yeah, also very long time.

The longest one I have been so far is about 26 days straight.

26 days?

Yeah, really?

Wow, okay.

Was that them just stopping a lot more

and taking their time in each place?

Technically no.

So it is Ho Chi Minh to Hanoi and we do the north.

Oh, and you did what?

The Haja Loops, don't you?

Doing everything, yes.

Wow, okay.

You go up to Sapa and all that.

Yeah, Sapa, Haja.

That sounds like it.

Right, V2 coming up.

So it's so new, of all of the trips that you've done,

has this trip with us been the most hectic, full,

with the most amount of breakdowns as well?

I can say that this is full of emotions.

You should be a politician.

You've probably been through all of that.

It was like we would be on the side of the road.

The worst was probably when Tom managed to burn his clutch out

trying to wheel spin mud into Garro.

Thought I'd broken the bike.

Yeah, you did break the bike.

I've broken it beyond repair for the trip is what I thought.

It got to such a bad state that I was looking around thinking,

right, who can we sell this bike to and where can we buy that?

Yeah, we were like, you know,

we were just going to go and find me another bike to buy.

Yeah, but you were so ham-fisted that there was no more clutch

material on the clutch plates.

It was not a metal.

Just one moment.

Just because you wanted to cover me.

Can you tell me this is a common problem on that bike, yes?

Yeah, correct.

For people like this.

Thank you.

I've got the people.

Yeah, there we go.

There we go.

But for Tom, it was so much of a common problem with the bike

that they then had wrote a massive warning on your fuel tank saying,

beware of the clutch.

Do not slip the clutch or from bad driving.

Poor driving.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Which Tom, what did you then do?

I think I drove excellently.

No, no, no, no.

The clutch would not agree.

So, Nune, were there any points of the trip where you thought,

ah, shit, we're in trouble.

I don't know where we're going to go from here.

Or did you always think it will be fine,

there'll be someone to help us?

I think the clutch was the first time I saw Nune going,

this is not good.

It's like, there was that moment.

How far did we have to go to find the clutch?

I think we had to find about four kilometers or five.

About that.

Oh, dear.

You would have been willing to walk that way.

We had to push you.

I've pushed motorbikes further than that.

Before we continue, a quick show of love to this week's second fantastic

sponsor, Febi Bilstein, with whom we have been partnered for 2025.

And I'm sure you guys already know the Febi name,

because their OE matching quality parts have helped keep countless cars alive

on the channel for quite a few years.

Talk us through.

We'll start with Big Pete, where I think we've ordered every single part

that Febi has to offer.

He's had a full restoration, yeah.

And then recently, my Mini, I've tested out every single Febi part.

We've now had a timing chain put on it.

We've had the head gasket.

Turbo.

Turbo, yeah.

Febi now do turbos as well, which is insane.

They partnered with Garret and...

Paul Gawner.

So you can now get an OE turbo.

Yeah, yeah.

It's just great.

Plus the E30 as well, that was a full Febi restoration as well.

Yeah, you guys know the Febi name already,

and the wheels would not be rolling on any of those cars without Febi.

And what we love most about Febi is they literally have every single car part

at the fraction of dealer prices.

And as you know, their parts are widely available wherever you like to get your parts from.

Febi also has a sister company called Blueprint that specializes in Asian cars,

and as with Febi, you get a three-year warranty on everything you buy.

And to find the car parts, you can use Febi's parts finder.

Yeah.

And all you have to do, just put your registration in,

and it will show every single part that Febi made.

Some of the cars that we have, they make like 500 parts.

Even down to like a brake rubber on an E28.

That car is 50 years old, and they're still making parts for it.

So do as we do, and do as the lady does,

because she was just asking about the Febi parts finder.

Yeah, she wanted to know about Febi parts.

Yeah, yeah.

Because she heard brake rubber, and she was like, oh, E28?

She was like, I have a BMW E28, yeah, yeah.

So yeah, just head on over to the website, and you will not be disappointed.

So again, Febi, thanks for supporting us.

We genuinely love what you guys do.

Shall we give her a hand with the parts?

Yeah, we'll show.

OK, OK.

But yeah, in your experience, were there any moments where you were like,

OK, this is now a bit too much.

I don't know if we can get out of this.

Or did you always think there'd be a solution?

So to my experience, all of this can be fixed.

So the reason why Rory's seeing me that day is kind of tough,

because we had the mountain road up ahead,

and then we will be arriving late at the hotel.

So you're more worried about arriving late than fixing the bike?

Yeah, because I know that the bag will be fixed.

So was there one thing that happened for you on this trip

where you thought you might have been in trouble?

I can think of one.

Was it meeting us the first day?

No, when you got a little something in your eye, didn't you?

Oh!

You're like that, you're like that.

So yeah, explain what happened.

We'd just broken down and we'd set off.

You had Rory on the back and then what happened?

So I just left my gloves on the ground.

Somehow there's an animal.

I don't know what that called then.

An animal?

A leech.

Yeah, a leech.

Hanging on my gloves and when I rubbed my eye, always coming in.

Coming for the flesh.

We were going along and then suddenly I could have seen noon,

like sort of like trying to look in the mirror on the bike,

like this and he's sort of just looking like this.

And I'm like, what is going on?

And then suddenly it's an instant stop.

Like we are like full break on coming over to the side of the road

and then he's just like everything off

and then he's just starting to do this.

And I'm like, what is going on?

I just didn't really think much of it.

And then he starts going,

is there something in my eye and he turns around and looks at me

and I can just see this little leech worm thing crawling up.

And I'm like, was it going?

And I was like, yeah, there's something there.

And then he starts going, get it, get it, get it.

And I'm there like trying to get it.

But as I'm trying to get it, it's because they grab on really well.

It's then crawling further and further up.

Inside his eye.

And you know when noon's panicking, you're in big trouble.

And then he turns around and then he's like doing this

and smush and it's trying to get it out and he gets it.

And then it's on his finger and it clasps onto his finger

and starts biting his finger.

And then it won't come off his finger

and he's then smush on the end of the hand.

And I'm like, what is going on?

Anyway, that was been terrible.

And then we then pull over.

I'm like, what the hell was that?

And we then catch up with you guys.

And then we pull over about an hour later.

I chased you down the road after for you.

Where are they?

And I saw you and I'm like, as I turned around coming along

and I pulled alongside and I was going, what's going on Rory?

Rory goes, I knew another leech.

And he's like, what?

You're kidding me.

This is so rough.

But yeah, we pull over an hour later and then I'm then going,

oh, I'm just going to go to the loo.

So anyway, I go to the loo, come back

and then I look at my fingers and sure enough,

I've got a leech on my hand as well.

But then because I just went to the loo,

I was paranoid of like, was that on me?

Was that down there?

And then these lot all taking the piss out of me,

especially Neurin was going like, oh, no, no,

is that on there?

And he kept doing this.

And then Alex was joining in on it.

Yeah, I was.

And that came back to...

We'll move on with the story.

Back to bite you, I would say.

Yeah, yeah, we got to the hotel and then I had a shower

and I looked at my towel and there was blood on it

and I was like, oh, shit, I'm like bleeding from my penis.

I don't know why I'm bleeding from my penis,

but you know, you always think worst case.

And then I look at my penis with a magnifying glass

and I'm like, no, it's all good.

And then I look at my leg and my leg is literally

just pouring out blood.

And I was like, what's going on?

And then I was like, oh, this might be a leech.

And then sure enough, went down to dinner

and I showed it to Neurin and you were like, yeah,

100% that's a leech.

That's bloody hell.

That's what you call karma, isn't it?

I think we got them at the waterfalls

because we got very curious and went down

this really, really muddy gnarly track.

We walked because our bikes are a bit crap off road.

And yeah, I think that's where we picked up

all these little bugs.

Yeah, not nice.

And then you bathed in that puddle.

Yes.

That's the only thing in the puddle that doesn't help.

Honestly, us regaling you guys with all these stories,

I'm so excited.

Like so incredibly excited to show you what we've been up to

because it's been the gnarliest, the best life changing

moments that we've been on.

We will never forget this.

And yeah, I really hope that when you watch these videos

that you will think, you know what?

I'm going to just get on the WhatsApp group

and just say, you know, March, April, May, whatever,

let's just jump on the flight

and let's just go hire some motorbikes

and let's go on an adventure of a lifetime.

And we'll take Newn with us.

And yeah, Newn is the man that you want.

Like he's been the best tour guide we possibly could have had

and has got us out of so, so many problems.

And now he's YouTube famous as well.

Yeah, that's it.

And his English is perfect and he can fix anything

and he can speak to anyone and just sort you out

any time.

So yeah, we are very, very, thank you.

Yeah, we've been very, very lucky to have you.

Although, yeah, thanks very much.

He can't get lobster cheaper than what it should be.

Ah, yeah, okay, yeah, yeah.

If you come to Vietnam and you're offered lobster,

just say no and walk away because it is so expensive.

It's not so expensive.

It's really cheap compared to Euro.

It's still cheap.

Compared to Euro.

No, it's like.

But Alex couldn't handle the fact that you'd go from

realistically and make like, you'd go out for a meal.

People, we were going to get a 20 pound dinner

and you ended up spending like a hundred and.

A hundred and twenty or something.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The lobster was actually like 80 or 90 percent.

But it was cool.

Of the entire bill.

It was, it was.

It was cool, but it wasn't actually that tasty.

The prawns were fantastic.

Yeah, the prawns were amazing.

Yeah.

But that is because you did ask them to cook the lobster

in a way that they didn't want to cook the lobster.

Yeah, well, I don't know how you cook lobster.

Well, we did ask them to put it on fire.

But then you pointed out we were on a wooden pontoon.

Yeah.

Which might not be the best idea.

So anyway.

So, Nuan, what have been your kind of like favorite moments?

And yeah, what have been your favorite moments then, do you think?

I'll put in you on the spot now.

I'm thinking about all the breakdowns.

So you've had many favorite moments.

We jump into the bikes and Tom, Alex, Garrett started talking.

And then that's when Tom stepped up and he said something

that always hilarious.

That's been my favorite moments.

All of that.

What, me talking shit?

What?

All three of us took a crap to each other.

Just stomping into the air.

And also, Huay, who's 20 years old,

he's like the mechanic who came with us.

He does not speak a word of English.

No, he does now.

Although he does know three words.

Would you like to tell us what those three words are?

Oh, fat men.

Yeah, we took great pleasure in him calling you the old fat man.

Yeah, he embraced that.

He did really embrace that.

There was an absolutely comedy golden at his best.

We didn't capture it.

But it was Tom trying to teach him swear words.

And so he was like, he was going, F, shit, right, F, shit.

And then Huay just looked at him and went, huh, huh?

Old fat man.

He was right on the money.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It was good.

Anyone thinking about coming out and doing a trip like this,

you mentioned like equipment and stuff you would do differently.

Yeah, yeah.

Like if people want to come out and do this,

what's your recommendation for people to bring with them from the UK?

I would start with like a European spec helmet.

Yeah, definitely a European spec helmet.

We had to wear, and we didn't have to,

but we chose to wear open face helmets more from the filming point of view.

But if I had the choice now, I would go with a flip top lid

with potentially a secondary visor.

So you can have it as open face or closed face.

So you've got the option of that.

I would definitely bring some waterproof boots and waterproof socks.

Yeah.

100%.

And some just some really good waterproofs and some elbow knee protection.

Yeah.

Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun.

So when you're riding in the city,

I don't really think it's necessary that you have all that gear.

But definitely when you're up in the mountains,

those roads are slippy because there's mud and stuff

that's falling off of the side of the road.

Yeah.

And as Gareth proved, you fell over or fell off on a corner just mid-breaking.

And it wasn't because there wasn't enough grip on the road.

It was because there was debris and stuff and gravel on the road.

So it was really unexpected.

So anything even the most experienced rider can fall off and go down.

So yeah, but just make sure the gear's lightweight.

And actually, in fact, even when you're up in the mountains

and it's really cold or it's a lot colder,

as long as you've got fully covered good water protection.

You don't actually need a lot of underlayers on.

Yeah.

Speaking about gear as well,

boots is a really important thing, Tom, isn't it?

Like, you want good boots.

Yeah.

So like, as you know, Newn was wearing like proper what I call

full-on motocross boots.

I think they're probably a little bit more than you need.

Like, you want something colorful, don't you?

Something that'll stick out.

Oh.

You know, we were shopping last night.

So before you reveal, if you're listening to this with your ear holes

and listen to the entire podcast, obviously,

and then maybe when you've got some time, go onto YouTube

and have a look at what Roy is about to pull out.

So we went to a shop in Hoi An,

which is the home of basically custom-made anything.

Shoes, clothes.

Especially leather stuff.

Yeah, they're really good at that.

And Tom saw a lovely pair of shoes that's going to go with it.

They're quite loud.

His very loud suit that he has.

Yeah, because we also had suits made, obviously.

And these are your shoes, Tom.

And they were made last night.

So they've been made probably overnight by a man.

It's going to be interesting to see if they fit, actually.

Well, let's chuck them on.

Let's have a little, shall we do a little fit test?

So, you know, but me being the generous chap that I am.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

This is a loaded statement.

Because you're going to say you bought me some shoes, are you?

Well, he did.

Yeah, but why is that?

Because he ruined my trainers.

Oh, and they've got the stitching in them now.

Will you hold that, please?

Did you get your purple stitching in the end?

No, they didn't do purple stitching, unfortunately,

but that's okay.

Sorry for all the rustling, everyone.

So, yeah, the lady had to actually measure you up yesterday,

didn't she?

It's the proper size.

Yeah, their feet are so big that she got these of A4.

Oh, God, they're still a little bit tight.

Oh, yeah.

Do you think she just gave you the length?

Well, I think she just measured the length

and because we didn't have a lot of time,

I don't think they've done the width, to be honest.

I think they'll stretch out, won't they, Tom?

Well, they will, because they're going to get very wet today.

Yeah, that is true.

Yeah.

So, Tom's boots that he's got are a mixture of yellow, red and blue.

And another yellow.

There's two yellows there.

First tan, isn't it?

It's a bit...

Oh, wow.

That is a bit of you, Tom.

I would say if you saw Tom wearing his suit

and his boots that he's got, you'd probably cross the street.

What was it you called him yesterday?

Old Fat Man.

It began with a P, didn't it?

But, yeah.

The Increditor.

So, they're Christmas party shoes, aren't they?

They are definitely Christmas party shoes.

Yeah, they are something, Tom.

It's good, isn't it?

Yeah, that's nice.

Strong look there.

Yellow suit, I've got a purple suit.

And going back to it, they'll offer you a lot of protection

on your foot.

They will, indeed.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So, I've got some...

I think they're Sidi or Spidi boots that come above the ankle.

They're kind of rubber and plastic.

So, they're fairly waterproof, so they're really good.

Good for drinking out of as well, would you say?

Sure, yeah.

They hold water well.

They do hold water very, very well.

And then I was just wearing shorts, which, yeah.

It's not the best if it's warm.

No, but you're going to wear shorts.

When you come here, you're going to wear shorts.

I would disagree.

I had the hiking trousers on the whole time.

Hiking trousers.

The black ones.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But what I mean is, if you come off,

those hiking trousers are going to do nothing.

No, no, no, they're not.

They're not wearing protection.

But I would say wear hiking trousers over shorts.

Well, though, they got very wet and they just hold the water.

Yeah, but they're dry.

Yeah, but they're quite, they're quite light.

Having been the only person who properly binded,

I would highly recommend a mesh armor jacket.

So, this one has back protection, elbow and shoulder protection,

because I rolled into it.

Yeah, I was going to say, I think you would have done a bit more damage

if you weren't wearing that.

It wasn't massively fast, because it was just kids for kids.

It was enough to just take that impact off.

Yeah, exactly.

And I would, and because it's the temperature variations are massive here,

a mesh jacket is perfect for hot and medium.

Which I recommend that.

Nguyen, you must be the only person in Vietnam

that I see wearing full bike gear.

Like, and I mean, the only person.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And tell us, tell us what your kit consists of.

So, I have the boots, of course.

Yeah, the boots.

Yeah, all the cross boots.

Knee guards.

Heaps.

Yeah.

And then, like, a shoulder ties inside.

That includes heaps, partition, and a jacket.

Big jacket, yeah.

Armor jacket.

And then full, over to the top of that all,

is a full, pretty much, suit.

Which, like, a motocross suit style thing.

Which, he started wearing this in Ho Chi Minh when it was 32 degrees.

Yeah, and we're like, you're mental.

What is he doing?

He's not finished there,

because he doesn't only put his helmet on,

because before the helmet goes on,

you put the big snood thing over.

So, yeah, you look like a robin bank.

You look like a ninja.

Yeah.

When you first put that on,

everyone was thinking you are mental.

And then it got to about day three

when it was starting pissing it down with rain.

And we were heading into the lat,

and it went to about 14 degrees.

And we were like, I should have worn that.

We did it, yeah.

You 100% get it.

Yeah, no, it's been amazing.

Tom, what have been your highlights, would you say?

My highlights, I think as difficult as it was,

I think riding in the rain through the mountain jungle area

with the mist and the noise of all the creatures in the jungle.

And I kind of lost myself riding down the twisty roads,

and it was just sort of so surreal.

Yeah, it took me into a place.

It was lovely.

So sorry to interrupt there.

Brother Tom has just written a little message on his phone,

because there's one story that we need to hear from Old Fat Man.

And it was a mirror.

Do you remember you were getting your laundry done?

So this is a message.

I haven't heard this yet.

You don't know this story.

I haven't.

Do you know, I've got the gist of what happened,

but I haven't heard it.

So I...

So, okay, right.

A lot of our clothes are getting really, really wet.

So we've got to a nice hotel.

They've got laundry service.

I'm like, brilliant.

Me being me, the Wally that I am.

I was messaging them,

how do you do the laundry?

He's rushing me back and I'll do it.

Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

He's making me laugh.

It was like, right, there's a form over there.

There's a pencil over there.

So I fill it all out and I ring up a ring up reception.

Yes, I've got some laundry, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

And it was a bit broken English, the guy back.

And I couldn't really understand what was going to happen.

And I thought, okay, but I think it was up.

Someone was going to come and collect it at some point.

I was like, okay, fine, no worries.

I need a shower.

Jump in the shower.

Get a shower.

And then there's a ding-dong, you know, someone.

I'm like, oh, shit, right.

Okay, I get out of the shower.

And I'm like, oh, and there's robes.

You know, because it's a spa.

There's robes in the cupboard.

So I think, right, no problem.

I'll grab a robe.

So I put a robe around me.

They're not really Tom's size.

So anyway, don't worry.

I thought myself, I'll do it like that and I'll tie it up.

Be all right.

Okay, no problem.

So then I bend over and I pick up the bag and the bit of paper.

You know, I don't know who's going to be at the door.

So I, so it's like a little hallway going up to my door

and I open the door and hide it behind the door.

Yeah.

Okay, I'm still back from the door.

You know, she doesn't need to see me in a robe.

It's not a good look.

No.

So I know I picked the bag up and I hand it to her.

And it's a young girl, right?

I handed her the bag, right?

And she's looking horrified.

And I'm like, you know, and I thought,

can't see me.

I'm not at this point.

I know, right?

The sort of tie things come on down in the road.

A little bit open, but I'm hiding behind the door.

I'm not worried, right?

Yeah, you're fine.

Yeah.

I'm fine.

I hand it to her and she's looking like, looking at me like,

you know, like, like, she's scared.

You know, poor girl scared.

So I handed the bag and then as I turn my head to the right

to shut the door, there's a f***ing mirror on the window.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

And I'm looking in the mirror and all I can see is my old hairy knackers.

And I'm like, oh, so bad.

Bye.

Yeah, I don't think she'll forget that in a hug.

No, no, she won't.

Anyway, done a marvellous job of the laundry.

That was the worst thing.

Literally, we went out.

Yeah.

That was when we were in the sand.

No, you threw my shoes in the sea.

I had to go and get my shoes.

Sorry, you threw my shoes in the sea.

Yeah, okay, anyway, we're off.

Anyway, right?

So I get back to the room and I've got sand all over me

and all the rest of it.

I think, well, I'll have a quick shower.

Oh, God, yeah.

But I don't need to shower the bottom half of myself.

No problem.

And there's a thing going on the door.

Did she come in with that?

No, honestly, I've got the towel.

I've got the towel around me and she opened the door.

It's the same bloody girl.

And she must think, what's wrong with it?

She's like, what is it?

He's just waiting for me.

Yeah, he's like, waiting for me.

Do you really think he's going to get away with it?

Were you wearing your predator shoes at the time?

No, I was wearing my predator shoes now.

Oh, God, yeah, no, I was funny.

But yeah, we've got so many moments like this

that I can't even remember at the moment.

Yeah.

So I can't wait, like I said, for you guys to see all of this.

Rory, how's it gone for you?

Because it's been a bit of an organisational catastrophe.

It's worked.

Yeah, yeah, we made it.

We're here.

I will say that we do need to wrap this up like pretty ace up.

Because speaking of organisational, we need to be on a flight.

Yeah, but we first need to jump on bikes.

Yeah, and film the last bit of the entire food weather.

Yeah, in our suits.

Oh, it is really, it's very, really raining here.

Yeah.

But you're happy with how it's all gone?

Yeah, I don't think this could have gone any better,

but I will say that was probably mainly down to having noon with us.

I think genuinely, if you're going to do this,

yeah, you can do it on your own.

Do yourself a favour, get a guide.

Yeah, get a guide.

Get a guide.

Don't buy a shit bike.

Rent a good one.

Hey, that bike was affectionately known by Hui as content bike.

Speaking of Veronica as well, I've got a decision to make.

Because I fall in love with her.

She's my Vietnamese mistress.

And I just don't know if I can just leave her here to rot.

Because who would have her?

Because no one here.

Do you want it?

Do you want to take a bite?

I think I'll just leave it there.

Leave it where?

To rest in the sea.

Shall I just leave it on the side of the road

with a key in the ignition and see what happens?

Yeah, no one was.

Because the cost of repairing that bike will be, it just keeps breaking.

Alex, that bike needs to rest.

I've got a couple of options, either leave her here

or ship her to the UK and have her as a bit of a prop.

I don't know.

I'm still in two minds.

But I've still got plenty of time to think about it, don't I, Rory?

You've got an hour.

Oh, shit.

OK.

Shall we have a little vote?

Yeah, go on.

Oh, come on.

I'm going to be completely outnumbered.

So who thinks that Alex should leave it here?

Who thinks he should ship it to the UK?

Brother Tom, what do you think?

Yeah, shit.

OK.

I think for the memories, that bike is priceless.

Rory's currently got his head in his hands.

Rory, how are you going to organise this?

I'm not organised.

The thing I know, it costs him a pound a day

or something like that to store it here.

And I know it'll be about in two years time, it'll be like,

Alex, you know that bike that you're still paying for?

And he'll be like, oh, yeah.

There's no problem, Rory.

You're going to organise the transport.

See, I've got a better idea.

No, no, because I don't like your idea.

You've just been uploaded.

I think we store the bike here and we come back

and we finish this trip.

Finish this trip.

Well, we've gone from south to centre,

but we haven't done centre to north.

Centre to north.

It writes itself.

I'll tell you what, I'll tell you what.

OK, can we have a new vote?

Yeah.

What will I do then?

We'll store Veronica here.

I'm going to take one of the panels with me.

We'll store Veronica here.

If the videos do well and if people really like it

and if they want to see more,

then we'll have to dip over again, won't we?

And finish the job.

Centre to the north.

Look, we're taking Nguyen with us as well.

Oh, definitely, definitely.

And we'll have to fly up.

Hopefully he's learnt more words than old fat man.

But if he hasn't, we're going to be disappointed.

Right, yeah, we're going to have to leave it there

because we do have a flight to catch

and we've got a last scene to film as well.

Yeah.

But yeah, honestly, you guys are in for a real kind of trip with us

because it was literally one of the best things we've ever done.

It's been amazing.

Yeah, it's fantastic.

And you've been on a bike for, I don't know,

when did you start riding in the 40s or something?

I've been riding motorbikes for 40 plus years.

Wow, OK.

You were riding in the war, weren't you?

I was riding when I was 10, 9, 10 years old.

And how does this rank as a road trip?

Oh, it's just I've never done anything like it.

I've done road trips in Europe, lots of stuff around the UK.

I've never done, this is just, you know, as I said,

I said when we were talking the other day, you know,

for what you can do a European track day for,

you can actually come out here and do this in terms of cost

and I can't think of any good reason or why not.

Would you recommend it for a 62-year-old man or?

Yeah, definitely.

Yeah, I don't, it's not physically challenging in terms of,

you know, we're going over jumps and we're doing stuff like this.

If you're on a good bike, it's not physically challenging.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, but on the Honda 150XR that I've been riding,

it's a really easy bike to ride, really nice.

Definitely, I would definitely choose that as an option.

And yeah, it's not, it's quite exhausting in terms of the fact

that it's long days.

But without the breakdowns and stuff like that,

and leaving at sensible times, you know, I think that most people

well into their 60s and, you know, early 70s could do this challenge,

no problem.

Okay, okay, nice.

So yeah, we would hopefully look forward to being back,

hopefully seeing you, welcoming you to the UK as well,

because I think you'll have fun there.

Noon, what's your Instagram if people want to get in contact with you?

We'll put it down on screen.

Yeah, yeah, we'll put it down on screen.

Yeah, but from us, we've got some packing to do,

we've got a flight to catch, and then we're going to be in Hanoi this afternoon.

But until then, thank you very much for supporting, showing your love,

and we will see you and talk to your ear holes and eye holes next time.

We'll see you soon.

Bye-bye!

you

S2 Ep23: Vietnam Podcast Special: Leeches, Close Calls & An Embarrassing Bathrobe Malfunction!

About this episode

GMC Typhoon

VinFast VF 3

Sidi boots

clutch

throttle cable

generator

Febi

timing chain

head gasket

turbo

Garrett

BMW E30

Blueprint

brake rubber

BMW E28

European spec helmet

open face helmets

flip top lid

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